Baby Experts 02 (8 page)

But Jared surprised her by asking, “Do you mind if I come in?”

Now she
did
look at him. “I don’t mind.”

Jared followed her inside, then slowly closed the door. “Tonight didn’t go the way I’d planned,” he admitted.

“I know. I thought we’d just have a relaxed evening and enjoy each other’s company.”

He took a step closer to her. The multicolor tones of the lamp created an intimate atmosphere as he rested his hands on her shoulders. “I’m anything but relaxed when I’m with you.”

They were both breathing faster…both waiting for whatever happened next. Maybe he was giving her the chance to back up or turn away. She wasn’t going to do that. Already her feelings for him were too serious to deny.

Without further warning, he embraced her. His mouth covered hers in a demanding kiss that took her breath away. Responding to Jared was as instinctive as breathing. He groaned as she reached around his neck and laced her hands in his hair. Warning bells in her head demanded she be careful. She knew this desire they were giving into was dangerous. Yet hadn’t she wanted this all night? They were alone now. Hadn’t she dreamed about intimacy with Jared that went beyond stolen kisses?

He broke the embrace to separate the edges of her shawl. Afterward, he pushed it over her shoulders. It fell to the floor. Free now, unencumbered by the layer of fabric, she tunneled her hands under his suit jacket, wrapped her arms around him and felt his heat through his shirt. He was still for a few moments as if he were appreciating that type of intimacy. But then, ready for more, he broke away to shrug off his jacket. It fell to the floor on top of her shawl.

Touching became as high a priority as kissing. He passed his hands up and down her bare arms, then removed the pins that held the curls on top of her head. One by one, they pinged as they landed on the hardwood floor. In no time, her hair was down around her face and he was stroking his fingers through it, angling her head so he could kiss her deeply, so his tongue could explore more thoroughly, so they could fall more overwhelmingly into their desire. Jared wasn’t seducing her. This wasn’t about seduction. It was about mutual need. She needed Jared. She was falling in love with him. She needed to know he wanted her as much as she wanted him. His hungry, fevered kisses told her that he did. His touch reiterated the same hunger.

When Jared fingered the fastener at the back of her neck, he hesitated for an instant and she knew why. He was giving her the opportunity to say stop. He was giving her a few moments to decide if she wanted to go further.

She didn’t need time to think. Right or wrong, smart or stupid, risky or dangerous didn’t matter. Only she and Jared together mattered.

Giving him the go-ahead, she tugged his tie down and began unbuttoning his shirt. Her actions were a clear message he quickly read. He nimbly unhooked the fastener under her hair, then slid down the zipper at the back of her
dress. With tantalizing slowness, he let the fabric drop but didn’t push it from her breasts. Rather he kissed her collarbone, lingered at her neck, moved an earring aside to tongue the shell of her ear. The tingling sensation on her skin, the intimate brush of his lips was as exciting as his kiss. Shivers danced down her spine and a delicious warmth began curling in her womb. It had been so long since she’d felt desirable…so long since she’d acknowledged her needs as a woman. Those needs included being touched and caressed and kissed. In her marriage, she’d always let Richard lead. Now she felt bold and needed to give pleasure, too, rather than just receive it. She slid her hand inside his shirt and caressed his chest.

Jared mumbled, “Emily, You’re going to make this happen too fast.”

“What’s wrong with that?” she asked, giving him a saucy grin.

With a wide smile, he pushed her dress from her breasts. “You’re not wearing a bra.”

“The bra’s in the dress,” she whispered.

“How convenient.” Leaning forward, he trailed kisses above each breast, then around them. He was driving her crazy, but she loved it. Finally he slid her dress down her hips and it fell to her feet. She was naked from the waist up, lacy bikini pants below.

With Richard, even after six years of marriage, she’d still felt self-conscious as if her figure were too lush, as if she didn’t match his ideal of a perfect woman. But the way Jared was looking at her, she was glad her breasts were full, proud her hips were rounded. She felt no self-consciousness at all and wondered who she was becoming.

“Do you know how sexy you look in your panties and high heels?”

“No,” she admitted.

He took a breast into each palm, bent his head and kissed one nipple, then the other. When his tongue teased her there, she thought her knees were going to give way.

He must have guessed because he scooped her up into his arms and carried her into the living room to the sofa. The moon shone through the window, casting just enough light that she could see the intense desire in his eyes.

When he laid her on the sofa, she teased, “Maybe I should see how sexy
you
look in your underwear and shoes.”

He laughed, a joyous laugh she’d never heard from him. Then he was kissing her again, undressing her completely.

Suddenly he stopped and seemed frozen.

“What’s wrong?”

“I don’t have a condom.”

She sat up and took his hand. “I’m on birth control…a hormone IUD.” She stopped, then went on. “I never had it removed.”

She thought Jared would start kissing her again. She thought they’d pick up where they’d left off.

“You’re really on birth control?” he asked as if he didn’t believe what she’d told him.

All she could do was reassure him. “I really am. But if you’re concerned about anything else…”

He seemed to come to some conclusion. “No. Nothing else.”

Quickly Jared shucked off his clothes and stretched over her on the sofa. They lay still, appreciating the intimate fit of their bodies the moment before desire plunged ahead into no-return passion. When Jared kissed her neck, she stroked his back, knowing they’d started a dance that could only end in completion.

Emily reached down and caressed Jared. He groaned, accepted the pleasure for a few moments, then took her hand away. “I want to make sure you’re ready.”

She was stunned by his thoughtfulness. But tonight it wasn’t necessary. “I’m ready now.”

He took her at her word and propped himself on his elbows. As he kissed her mouth, she thought she’d climax without him being inside her. But that would be such a loss.

He entered her with a long, smooth thrust. Their bodies glistened now and she’d never been hotter, more excited, more aroused. Jared drove into her again and again. All she could do was instinctively wrap her legs around him and hold on tight.

The climax, when it came, was a hailstorm of sensations. Delicious tingles began at her center and spread to every nerve ending. Her body tightened and then wondrously unwound, shaking her until she trembled all over.

Jared went still, waiting for her to enjoy every last wave of pleasure. Then he pressed deeper and harder and faster until she came again and he found a shuddering release.

They lay there in the profound silence. Emily’s heart rate slowed as she caught her breath and floated back to earth.

Jared raised his head and asked, “Are you okay?”

A deep concern in his voice tightened her throat. “I’m good. How about you?”

He brushed her hair away from her cheek. “I’d like to tell you that this isn’t what I intended when we came in. But…I think subconsciously this is what I wanted since the day I hired you.”

“But you didn’t
know
me.”

“Chemistry like we have has nothing to do with knowing.”

“I don’t believe that. Are you saying you hired me because you wanted to have sex with me?”

He swore. “I knew I shouldn’t have said anything. I knew this was going to get complicated.”

“We just had sex, Jared. Sex is complicated, at least for me. I don’t have sex with any man I just happen to be attracted to.”

“And you’re the only woman I’ve had sex with since my divorce.” He pulled away from her and sat up as if that revelation had been a little too honest. “Bathroom?” he asked.

“To the right. Under the stairs.”

The night drafts seemed to invade the house, and Emily suddenly felt cold. She was falling in love with Jared Madison. That idea was terrifying enough. But the really scary part was that he would look on tonight as if it were just pure sexual pleasure. Hadn’t he felt more than that? Hadn’t he felt something that went beyond the physical?

There was an afghan on the back of the sofa and she reached for it, sitting up, and wrapping it around herself.

Jared had picked up his clothes on the way to the bathroom. When he returned to her, he’d flung on his shirt and slacks, but the shirt was still unbuttoned and hung loose. “I’d better go,” he said, sitting beside her on the sofa, reaching for his socks.

“We have a bottle of brandy Tessa’s father gave her. Or I can make coffee.”

“I’d better get home. I’m sure Chloie would rather sleep in her own bed than on my sofa.” He slipped into his shoes and tied them.

“Jared—”

Straightening, he settled his arm around her and kissed her lightly on the lips. “I did not mean to suggest I hired you because I wanted to have sex with you. I just meant the first time I saw you, I was attracted to you. More than
attracted to you. But I never intended to act on it. Then suddenly, there you were, so gentle and compassionate with my daughters, eager to help. I never wanted to take advantage of you.”

“You haven’t.”

“I’m not sure about that. I do know tonight was a mistake and one we shouldn’t repeat.”

Deep down, she’d known that’s what he was going to say. Giving in to desire had a price. That price could be even thicker walls between them. She hoped not. That was the last thing she wanted.

Jared said, “About tomorrow. What should we do?” He meant about their get-together with Tessa and Vince.

“Do you still want to go?”

Jared considered it. “I’d like to see their place, the barn and what they’re doing. It would be good for the girls to spend time with other children.”

“I could just not go.”

“You suggested that before and I vetoed it, remember? Tessa and Vince are
your
friends. How uncomfortable would you be if we both go?”

“I can focus on the kids and help Tessa in the kitchen. There’s no reason why we both can’t have a good time.”

She wanted to believe that. She didn’t want to cut Jared out of her life or have him cut her out of his. She still believed they had a chance for more, if he’d only let his guard down…if he’d only believe he could be happy and have more in his life than his children and his work.

“It’s settled,” she said with a shrug, as if none of it really mattered, as if sex were just casual entertainment, as if her feelings for Jared hadn’t taken on a whole new dimension tonight. “I’ll meet you at Tessa and Vince’s at four.”

When Jared studied her, Emily hoped he was only
seeing her mussed hair, her heated cheeks, her just-kissed lips. She hoped he wasn’t seeing the love growing in her heart for him.

If he saw that, he would cut her out of his life.

Last night had shaken Jared to his core.

The scent of sage drifted with the wind as he glanced at the cotton fields in the distance, then watched Amy and Courtney toss a sponge ball to fourteen-month-old Natalie. Emily sat on a blanket with ten-month-old Sean in front of her. With his shoulder still mending after surgery earlier in the summer, he didn’t yet have full use of his arm. But Vince had told Jared his son had come a long way.

Jared stood at the edge of the yard where the foundation of the new barn lay waiting for the construction crew.

Tessa strolled toward him, her blond hair blowing in the wind. She was a beautiful woman but…he’d never been attracted to her. So why did Emily pack such a punch? Why could she turn him on with a lift of her brow, a smile, a look?

“Don’t you love to watch them play?” she asked Jared.

“I do. I really love to hear them laugh.”

“I know. Laughter means everything is right in their world.”

“I think about when Amy and Courtney grow up. If they’ll still be close…if they’ll go to the same colleges.”

Amy ran over to Emily, dropped the ball into Sean’s lap, then laid her head on Emily’s shoulder.

“Your twins like Emily.”

“They do.”

Tessa didn’t say anything for a few moments, but he could tell she had something on her mind. He waited.

Finally she looked away from the kids to him. “Emily’s still vulnerable.”

“Meaning?” He didn’t like anyone poking into his life, but he knew Tessa meant well.

Last night you and Emily seemed…closer than boss and employee. Today you’re staying a room apart. I know this is your business and hers, but she’s a good friend, Jared. I want to see her happy. Not hurt again. When she first moved to Sagebrush—” Tessa stopped and her expression said she might have revealed too much.

All Jared had to do was think about the way Emily had given herself to him last night. She’d been free, passionate, erotically sensual. He’d even trusted her word she was on birth control. And he didn’t trust women easily anymore.

“Her husband was a bastard, wasn’t he? She hasn’t said much. But I’ve gotten the feeling she felt used…put down.”

He could see Tessa didn’t know whether to answer or not. Finally she replied, “I think you’re on the mark.”

After last night, Jared knew Emily deserved a man who wasn’t closed off to her…a man who trusted wholeheartedly and could dream. He was closed off. He didn’t dream anymore except for a happy future for his twins. He wasn’t the man for her.

He assured Tessa, “I won’t hurt Emily.” He knew he wouldn’t because he was going to keep his distance. They would work together amicably and he would shut down his desire for her. He could do it.

He’d had a lot of practice shutting down and burying his feelings ever since he was ten. It shouldn’t be hard to do now.