Back to You (6 page)

Chapter Five

Lynsey was surprised to receive a phone call early Sunday morning from Suzy. She wanted to meet for coffee at the Cozy Corner Diner. Since Suzy’s calls were so sporadic of late, it was a delight to hear from her.

At noon, when Lynsey arrived at the Cozy Corner , Suzy was already waiting for her.

Lynsey slid onto a chair across the table from her friend. “I’m so glad you called.”

“Well, I know I’ve been out of touch a lot lately. I’m not trying to avoid you, Lynsey.” Suzy laughed lightly, but it seemed forced, and she avoided making direct eye contact.

“How are Doug and the kids doing?” She hoped that Suzy would say something that might explain her peculiar behavior.

“Fine. Doug took the kids to his parents’ house for the day. I needed a break.” She sipped her coffee. “Anyway, I wanted to see you and find out how things are going.”

“Things are going well. My house will be ready in about two weeks. The painters are nearly finished now, and the carpet will be laid this week. Yesterday I went to a party at Caleb Smith’s house. It was to celebrate his promotion to detective.”

“Oh, and how did that go?”

“It was great.” She clasped her hands together. “I have a tentative dinner date with Owen Mitchell. He’s very everything—very attractive, very sexy, very interesting.”

“Lynsey, he has a metal mouth! He probably can pick up radio reception from Eastern Europe with those teeth!”

She ignored the comment. “And,” she lowered her voice, “Caleb wanted me to stay the night.”

“You didn’t, did you?” Suzy nearly shrieked, causing Lynsey to startle.

“Of course not. It’s too soon. But I do have to say, he’s now at the top of my eligible man list. Have you seen him? I mean, actually looked at the man? For forty-five, he looks amazing. I also have to admit that I am desperately lonely, and the thought of a handsome man holding me in his arms all night is very enticing.”

“Just don’t sleep with him and you’ll be fine.”

“He would give me beautiful, red-haired children,” Lynsey provoked.

“My brother will give you beautiful, blond-haired, blue-eyed children,” Suzy countered.

Lynsey stared down into the cup of black coffee the waitress had just placed on the table. Suzy was convinced that with her encouragement, she and Nick would become a couple and live happily ever after, but what happened between her and Nick was their own personal business. She didn’t care if Suzy
was
his sister.

Her eyes shot daggers at Suzy. “Your brother never wants to get married again. He also doesn’t want children. He’s told me so.”

“I can’t believe that,” she balked. “When did he tell you that?”

“We went out on the lake a few days ago. Nicky told me that he was married for a long time, and now he wants to spend some time alone—maybe forever. He also said that he wanted kids at one time, but not anymore. I believe his exact words were, “I don’t foresee fatherhood in my future.” As a matter of fact, I think he was so uncomfortable talking about it with me that he actually considered jumping out of that itty bitty row boat and into the lake, just to get away from me.”

“Then you’re doing something to make him say those things. My brother loves you. I don’t understand why you continually push him away. To me, it’s almost as if you think that he’s not good enough for you!” Suzy’s tone was blistering.

Anger ignited within Lynsey. “How dare you say that to me! Until very recently, your brother was still wearing a wedding ring! He still has a tan line around his finger! What we share is an occasional kiss or two. Sometimes it’s a lingering touch. If he did feel something for me, he’s had every opportunity to tell me!”

“Nicky is just shy. He thinks that you’ll reject him.”

She didn’t want to argue with Suzy about Nick any longer, or speculate about what he may or may not be thinking. Standing up, she dug in her handbag for cash and threw several bills onto the table. But before she left, she had one more point to make.

“You know Suzy, I’ve always been happy for you and supported all the decisions you’ve made in your life, whether I agreed with them or not. I don’t understand why you can’t show me the same courtesy. Between you and your brother, I almost wish I never returned to Unity.” With those words, she stormed out of the diner, the glass door banging closed behind her.

***

Nick showed up unannounced at his sister’s house early on Monday morning bearing an apricot pastry from the local bakery and take-out coffee. His original intention was to find out why Lynsey was so sad of late, and why she continually stayed closed away in her bedroom.

But when he stepped into Suzy’s house, he was immediately thrown by the changes not only in the house, but in his sister.

The once-immaculate home was now cluttered and smelled sour. Dirty dishes were stacked both in the sink and on the counter, with gnats buzzing around the mess. The cereal bowls from breakfast were still on the kitchen table. Below his feet, the linoleum was sticky and dirty. Even clothing had been left discarded in piles in every corner.

Suzy herself looked absolutely pale and drawn. She was now so thin and frail that she looked positively breakable. Her clothes were rumpled, and her hair was in strings.

“What is going on with you?” he asked as he gathered up the breakfast dishes from the kitchen table and placed them in the already overflowing sink.

“I have four kids and a husband who is always on the road. That’s what’s going on with me,” she snapped.

He didn’t believe her. “Granted, Doug has never been away so often before, but you’ve had four kids for quite a few years now. Your house is coming down all around you . Don’t you care? Your kids are living in this filth.”

“If you don’t like it, Nicky, you know where the door is. Don’t let it hit you on the way out.”

He took a seat at the table and uncapped his coffee. “I’m sorry; I didn’t come here to badger or berate you. All I want to say is if something’s going on and you need my help, just give me a shout.”

“Listen, let’s not make a big deal out of this, Nicky, or get into any wicked arguments with each other, okay? I’m just going through a bit of a rough patch, and the house just seemed to spiral out of control. I plan to get my act together and start cleaning this afternoon.”

He hoped she was serious. Over the years, he had called Child Protective Services for homes that weren’t as half as bad as Suzy’s. “Actually, I came by to ask you if you know if anything’s wrong with Lynsey. She’s pretty much been barricaded in the bedroom since Sunday afternoon.”

“Oh, about that…” Suzy picked at the icing drizzled across the apricot pastry. “Lovely Lynsey and I got into a rather heated disagreement Sunday morning at breakfast. It didn’t end well. She left the diner angry, and I haven’t heard from her since.”

He frowned. “I’ve never known you two to argue—ever.”

“Well, I said some things I shouldn’t have, I guess. I need to apologize to her.”

“For what?” It wasn’t his business, but he needed to be sure that he wasn’t somehow involved.

“Lynsey told me about Caleb Smith’s party. It seems he’s trying to rekindle their old relationship. Caleb is telling her everything she wants…no, everything she
needs
to hear.”

“Like what?”

“That he wants to settle down, get married, and have children right away. Nicky, she’s lonely and she’s vulnerable. She’s going to fall under his spell.”

He shook his head. He found it difficult to believe that a woman as strong as Lynsey could ever be lonely or vulnerable. “You have to convince her that Caleb is wrong for her,” he insisted. “Try to keep encouraging her towards Evan. He’s the right man for her.”

“No, Nicky, you’re the right man for her. But you’re too stubborn—or stupid—to believe it. I can only fight for you for so long. You’re going to lose her forever, you know. If it isn’t Caleb, and I was a gambling woman, I’d bet my money that it will be Owen Mitchell.”

He considered this. He liked Owen, and he had gotten to know him on a personal level when Evan was injured. Owen was a good guy. Still…

“I could live with her being married to Owen.”

Although he said the words out loud he didn’t really believe them in his heart. Yet, he pressed on with his little speech.

“Granted, he is a little odd. If she can see past the metal teeth, he might be very good for her. He’s a wee bit aggressive, but she could tame him easy enough.”

“So, you’re just going to give in, then?” She tilted her head and sipped her coffee.

“There’s nothing to give in to, Suzy. There is no Lynsey and me; there never will be,” he said quietly.

“Ah Nicky, stop with the act.” She rolled her eyes. “Just admit to me, finally, that you love her. I already know. I see it in the way you look at her, and I can hear it in your voice. Just admit, it, damn it!” She slammed her hand on the wooden table so hard the take-out coffee cups nearly spilled.

“Fine! I love her! I’ve always loved her! I’m not good enough for her! I never have been, and I never will be! Is that what you wanted to hear?”

He hadn’t meant to yell so loudly, but there was a point to be made. Across from him, Suzy covered her ears with her hands.

“I’m sorry,” he said lowly.

“Did that feel good?” she asked, uncovering her ears.

“Damn good, actually,” he admitted.

“Nicky, I’m only going to say this one more time and I’m dropping the subject forever because it’s straining my friendship with Lynsey. Please, please tell her how you feel. I know that she loves you too. You are a good man, and you are good enough for her. She would be very lucky to have you as a husband.”

Suzy didn’t understand that he and Lynsey shared too much negativity in their past to see their way to a future together. He knew he had broken her heart beyond repair or forgiveness, and everything that happened was entirely his doing.

“All I can say Suzy is, don’t get your hopes up for something that will probably never happen.”

***

When Nick got home, he climbed the stairs in search of Lynsey. The door to her bedroom was open and she was lying on her stomach, propped up by her elbows. She was so absorbed in the newspaper that she didn’t notice him standing in the doorway.

Dressed in a little pair of denim shorts that accentuated her shapely bottom and a green shirt that hugged her curves, she was without a doubt the most beautiful woman he had ever known, and he still loved her as much as he had twenty years earlier. He only wished he could explain to her that he had loved her enough to let her go all those years ago so she could become the success that she was now. But he didn’t know how to approach the subject, or if she would even want to discuss it with him.

“Lynsey?”

She looked up from the newspaper and smiled at him. “Hi, Nicky.”

His stomach clenched painfully when he realized that their time together, even as chaste as it was, would soon come to an end. She would be in her new home being romanced by that pig Caleb Smith.

“I know that Suzy’s pressuring you to tell her what went on between the two of us all those years ago, and that it’s straining your friendship. I just want to say that it’s okay with me if you want to tell her. I would rather it came from you. I wouldn’t feel comfortable speaking with my sister about something so personal.”

Lynsey maneuvered herself into a sitting position on the bed. “Are you sure, Nicky? I’m perfectly happy to keep our past between the two of us. It’s really not anyone else’s business but ours.”

He leaned against the doorframe. “I know it is, Lynsey, but if you feel you want to tell her, just do it. I’m not ashamed of what happened between us.”

He was ashamed by what happened—not for falling in love with her, but for the shabby way he had treated her after they made love. It set off a chain of events that drove her into Caleb Smith’s arms.

He forced a smile that he didn’t feel and walked back downstairs to start the kettle on the stove. As he waited for the water to boil, he couldn’t stop thinking about the past. There was so much he wanted to say to Lynsey. He wanted to ask her why she had kept their secret for so long. At any time, she could have gone to Kelly and blown his marriage to smithereens. But she hadn’t, even though he had hurt her beyond forgiveness.

But realistically, he knew that even if Lynsey was out for revenge, and had gone to Kelly with the truth that he had been unfaithful to her just two weeks before their marriage, it wouldn’t have changed things. After all, he suspected that Kelly knew all along, anyway. No, that wasn’t quite right—he was sure that Kelly knew.

When the coffee was ready, he took a seat at the kitchen table and thought back to the tension between him and Kelly over the years whenever the subject of Lynsey surfaced.

Every time there was an article or photograph in a newspaper or magazine about Lynsey, Suzy would bring him a copy. When Kelly would make a snide comment about Lynsey and her success, he mostly just held his tongue to keep the peace. Kelly was an extremely jealous woman, and there was no sense inciting her wrath.

But the time came when he could hold his feelings inside no longer. A national magazine ran a story on Quinn Michaels that hinted at his involvement with Lynsey, and speculated that Quinn and Lynsey would soon announce their engagement. A photo spread of the couple covered several pages, and Lynsey had looked absolutely radiant on the arm of the popular blond singer.

Kelly pulled the magazine from his hands, abruptly closed it, and tossed it aside. “Lynsey Reznor is nothing but a lucky little whore who gets by on her looks, not her talent,” she had said.

Enraged, Nick jumped to his feet, his eyes burned pure blue fire as he glared down at his wife. “I should have married Lynsey when I had the chance! I would have been happy now!” He spat the words out with venom.

Kelly said nothing. For a long moment, she simply stared at him. She then grabbed her handbag and walked out of the house.

When he didn’t hear from her for a week, he began to realize that divorce was finally an option. He felt so liberated without Kelly constantly in his shadow, making all the decisions for him. Sure, he would probably have to pay out a good portion of his paycheck to her in alimony, and he would most likely lose the house to her, but he no longer cared. He would be free!

After two weeks passed, he came home from work to find Kelly in the kitchen cooking dinner. She just walked back into the house and acted like she never left. Nick figured that her parents sent her back to make the marriage work.

He was determined to ask her for a divorce. The decision had been put off far too long. Before he had a chance to speak with an attorney, her Lupus flared up and she was hospitalized. This time, she didn’t recover.

Now, as he looked around his old-fashioned kitchen with its outdated appliances and ugly metal cabinets, he suddenly was struck by the realization that he didn’t like this house and never really did. Kelly and her parents picked the house without asking for his opinion. It was just a shell full of old, bitter, and unhappy memories that he felt desperate to shed.

Sure, the lake and the surrounding land were fabulous, and maybe that would attract a buyer. There was plenty of space to make an addition to the house. Maybe it was time to sell and start over on his own terms. Finally.