Bare Instincts: A BBW Paranormal Bear Shifter Romance (2 page)

When Burke and Tom had been in high school, they could have had anything they wanted. Now, Tom was gone. She could only imagine how lost Burke must feel.

He certainly wasn’t the carefree man she’d seen the last time he’d been in town, and she wasn’t sure he’d ever be the same again. Her heart continued to ache as she climbed into her car and headed home.

Sure, Burke had returned her hug, but he’d pulled away quickly. It was as if he didn’t want to be around her. He’d also exuded a strange vibe that put her out of sorts. As soon as their bodies touched, it was as if all the letters in one of her books had played musical chairs. The words had jumped up, run around in a circle, and returned to a different location. She felt disoriented, confused, and a bit overwhelmed. Perhaps it was because she didn’t deal well with death.

Once home, Tasha settled into her favorite chair to read, but the words kept blurring. Poor Tom. From what his dad said, his son had struggled a lot and ended up on a path he couldn’t recover from. He’d made poor choices, but she bet he hadn’t expected to die or even wanted to die. Deep inside, though, he couldn’t have been happy. If only he’d stopped to think how his actions might have affected his family and the people who cared about him. Tom had been searching for something. Unfortunately, he’d never find it now.

It was hard enough to lose a friend, and no matter how much she thought about the reasons why he’d taken the path he did, she’d never really know. It was best to remember the good times they’d had as kids. She returned to her book, but after a few pages, she couldn’t focus. Burke’s face, and the pain radiating off him, kept appearing in her mind’s eye.

Tasha slapped her book closed and headed into the kitchen to fix more coffee—not that she needed more caffeine. What she really needed was a drink.

Going to the bar alone, however, wasn’t her thing, so she located her cell and called her best friend, Cheyenne Snow. On a Saturday night, the lucky lady would probably be busy with her fiancé, Storm Durant, but perhaps she could spare an hour for a quick drink. Having gone to school with Tom and Burke, Chey would want to know what happened.

She knew her friend would be at her veterinarian clinic, so Tasha dialed the office. When she asked for Dr. Snow, she was told that she was with an animal and couldn’t be disturbed.

“Could you have her call me when she has a moment?” Tasha left her number.

Well, that was a bust, but not all was lost. She called Emmaline Nettles, her other good friend, who worked normal hours—Monday through Friday, nine to five. The three of them often hung out together if their schedules lined up.

“Tasha?”

That almost brought a smile to her lips. “Were you hoping for someone else?” They had discussed the possibility of going out tonight but hadn’t set up a time or a place.

“No. You don’t sound good. Are you okay?”

Tasha pulled out the chair at the kitchen table and sat down. “Do you remember Tom Devereaux?”

“I know Mr. Devereaux is your dad’s Beta, but I don’t think I know Tom. Isn’t he one of his sons?”

“Yes.” Emmaline was a wolf shifter, and while the two clans did interact, they didn’t go out of their way to socialize. “I grew up with Tom and his younger brother, Burke. I just learned Tom overdosed last night. Burke was with him when it happened.”

Em sucked in a big breath. “I’m so sorry.”

“Me, too. I was calling to confirm our date tonight. I can’t get ahold of Chey, but I left her a message.”

“You sure you want to go out?”

“More than sure. I don’t want to be alone. It’s times like these that reinforce the need for good friends.”

“Amen.”

“You up for the Cove Bar at six?” They could catch a bite and share a few drinks.

“You bet.”

After she disconnected, Tasha traipsed into the bedroom to look for her old photo albums. Her parents had given her an instamatic camera when she was little and growing up, she’d taken endless pictures. Tom’s death had pushed the harsh reality of the world to the forefront, and she felt a need to look back at those childhood memories of when they were all together without a care in the world. She’d always said that someday she’d get them transferred to digital, but had never taken the time. Maybe, now she would.

Chapter Two

A
s soon as
Tasha reached their usual table on the far side of the bar, Emmaline stood and hugged her. “How are you doing?”

“I’m sad, though I’m equally mad at Tom, too. The man had everything and yet thought nothing about throwing it all away.”

Em clasped her hand. “Are you sure that was what happened? Perhaps his hard partying was a way to mask his inner demons.”

Her friend was right, but Tasha wasn’t sure she wanted to think so deeply tonight. “What I don’t get is that in high school Tom seemed to have it all.”

Lily, their usual bartender, came over with a big smile. “What can I get you ladies?”

She was so damned cheerful. “I’ll have a scotch on the rocks,” Tasha said.

Lily’s brows furrowed. “Bad day?”

“Someone I know died.” Lily had moved to town after Burke and Tom had already left.

“I’m sorry, hon, the first one’s on me.” She faced Em. “And for you, sweetie?”

“Whatever you have on draft.”

“You got it.”

Em leaned forward. “You said Burke was with him. Where’s he now?”

“He came back to town today. I saw him over at the café. He looks really torn up.”

Emmaline sucked in an audible breath. “That’s terrible. To watch someone die and not be able to help them would be my worst nightmare.”

“Me, too.”

Em looked up and smiled. “Hey, there’s Chey.”

As happy as Tasha was to see her, she didn’t relish telling her the bad news. Chey stopped at the bar to order a drink before coming over. She hugged them both then pulled up a chair. “I got your message just a few minutes ago. Em texted me earlier and said you two were headed over here.”

“I’m glad you could come. Where’s Storm?”

“He’ll stop by later. He was held up by a patient.”

“Tell her,” Emmaline coaxed.

Tasha faced her friend and told her about Tom. She also explained that Burke had been with him at the time.

She shook her head. “Holy shit. I chatted with Burke the last time he was in town. From what I could tell, both of them seemed headed for trouble. But then I’m not into all that hard partying.”

Tasha leaned back. “What makes someone want to get so high?”

Chey shrugged. “Half my Clan seems to be high on drugs or they drink to excess. Dad’s tried to change our cheetah culture, but it’s hard. I’m hoping that when Storm takes over as Alpha, he can affect some changes. My guess is that my Clansmen are not happy and want to escape, kind of like what you’ll probably be doing tonight.” She tossed her a weak smile. “It’s okay in small doses.”

Tasha agreed about the small doses part. “I can’t imagine partying all the time. It seems like a lonely way to live.”

After Lily came over and delivered their drinks, Chey held up hers. “I totally agree. To a happy life.”

“Amen,” they said in unison.

*     *     *

Burke had been
uncomfortable talking about Tom in front of Alden Wilder, but his father had seemed fine with it. Finally, he and his dad left the café and headed home. If he thought being with his dad was hard, seeing his mom cry completely shredded what was left of his heart.

When he’d walked in, she’d been with Julie Wilder balling her eyes out. Once more, he had to rehash what had happened to Tom that night. From the intensity of their reaction, he suspected his parents would be in shock for years to come. Even worse, they thought he had the answers, and that was the furthest thing from the truth. They kept asking him why Tom had taken so much drugs, and all Burke could do was hold up his hands and shrug.

Several of the neighbors had stopped by and brought over food, since that was what good friends did, but after a few hours, he couldn’t handle seeing his folks in so much pain.

“Mom, would you mind if I go out? I need some air.” Normally, he wouldn’t have asked, but he didn’t want to cause his parents any more dismay.

“Sure, hon.” She hugged him for the hundredth time. “Just be careful on your bike, and please don’t drink too much. You know how I worry.” She never did approve of his mode of transportation, or his partying ways, for that matter.

All he could do was nod. Outside, he hopped on his Harley and called his best friend, Wade Black, another bear shifter. Wade was a year older, which put him between Burke and Tom. All three used to hang out in high school. Even though Burke and Wade had escaped from Hidden Hills, they’d kept in touch. Burke’s dad had told him Wade had just come into town yesterday for his father’s birthday. The timing was perfect.

His friend answered. “Hey, man. Long time no hear. What’s up?”

Clearly, he hadn’t learned of Tom’s death. “I’m in town for a bit. Want to catch a beer at the Cove?” He’d wait until they were face-to-face before telling him about the tragedy.

“Sure. I just got in last night myself. Mom’s doing it up big for Dad’s birthday celebration next week. You want to meet now?”

“If you’re free, I’m on my way there.”

“Sure.”

Before Wade changed his mind, Burke disconnected.

As much as he wanted to ride without his helmet, being reckless would be stupid. While the summer night air was perfect for cruising, the trip downtown would remind him of Tom too much—where they used to hang out, which buildings they’d trashed on Halloween, and which parking lots they’d taken girls to make out with. Christ. If he didn’t push this horror aside, he might end up like his brother—unhappy and in denial.

When Burke entered the bar, the band was playing, and the place was packed. Wade waved to get his attention, and Burke headed his way.

When he reached the table, Wade stood and clapped him on the back. “Didn’t expect you to be home.”

“Let me get a drink, and we’ll talk.” Wade already had his beer.

Focused on locating a spot to catch the bartender’s attention, Burke wedged between two lovely ladies and held up a hand. With hungry glances, the women swiveled on their stools. Last week, he might have worked the angle, but not tonight.

A thirty something, female bartender stepped up to him. “What’ll you have?”

“Jack Daniels on the rocks and keep them coming. I’ll run a tab. Name’s Burke.”

“You got it, Burke.” She quickly fixed the drink and handed it to him on a napkin.

Once back at the table, he blurted out what happened. “Tom overdosed last night.”

“Holy shit. No way.” As expected, Wade was devastated. Tom had been a good friend of his, too.

They talked about his brother’s path to destruction and the things Burke could have done differently.

“You can’t make someone do something they don’t want to,” Wade said.

“Maybe.” Burke had heard the platitude too many times, but somehow he believed that if he’d listened better or been firmer, Tom wouldn’t have gone over the edge.

Wade lifted his beer. “To Tom.”

Burke tapped his drink. He didn’t want to spend the evening getting more depressed. “So what have you been up to?”

“Doing a little of this and a little of that,” Wade said.

Weren’t they two peas in a pod? At least Burke had made his mark in Pennsylvania. He wasn’t sure about Wade and his ability to strike it rich.

His friend looked around and stilled. “I know what will cheer you up.”

Nothing short of his brother coming back to life could accomplish that. He downed his drink. “What’s that?”

Wade nodded to one corner of the room. “There’s Emmaline, Tasha, and Chey. Want to join them?”

“Not particularly. I’m not exactly good company tonight.”

Wade pushed back his chair. “Come on; it’ll be good for you.”

His friend picked up his beer and threaded his way around the tables. “
Thanks, buddy,”
he telepathed, but being alone wasn’t what he wanted right now, so Burke followed behind. As he neared, his chest tightened and his pulse raced, almost as if he was in heat or something. This odd reaction only seemed to happen when he was around Tasha. Sure, she’d grown into a beautiful woman, but she was a librarian—not his type at all.