Complete Works of Robert Louis Stevenson (Illustrated) (515 page)

Jean Watt, the Deacon’s Mistress

Vagabonds, Officers of the Watch, Men-servants

The Scene is laid in Edinburgh. The Time is towards the close of the Eighteenth Century. The Action, some fifty hours long, begins at eight p.m. on Saturday and ends before midnight on Monday

DEACON BRODIE

OR THE DOUBLE LIFE

ACT I

TABLEAU I

The Double Life

The Stage represents a room in the Deacon’s house, furnished partly as a sitting-, partly as a bed-room, in the style of an easy burgess of about 1780. C., a door; L.C., second and smaller door; R.C., practicable window; L., alcove, supposed to contain bed; at the back, a clothes-press and a corner cupboard containing bottles, etc.

Mary Brodie at needlework; Old Brodie, a paralytic, in wheeled chair, at the fireside, L.

SCENE I

To these, Leslie, C.

Leslie. May I come in, Mary?

Mary. Why not?

Leslie. I scarce knew where to find you.

Mary. The dad and I must have a corner, must we not? So when my brother’s friends are in the parlour he allows us to sit in his room. ‘Tis a great favour, I can tell you; the place is sacred.

Leslie. Are you sure that “sacred” is strong enough?

Mary. You are satirical!

Leslie. I? And with regard to the Deacon? Believe me, I am not so ill-advised. You have trained me  well, and I feel by him as solemnly as a true-born Brodie.

Mary. And now you are impertinent! Do you mean to go any further? We are a fighting race, we Brodies. O, you may laugh, sir! But ‘tis no child’s play to jest us on our Deacon, or, for that matter, on our Deacon’s chamber either. It was his father’s before him: he works in it by day and sleeps in it by night; and scarce anything it contains but is the labour of his hands. Do you see this table, Walter? He made it while he was yet a ‘prentice. I remember how I used to sit and watch him at his work. It would be grand, I thought, to be able to do as he did, and handle edge-tools without cutting my fingers, and getting my ears pulled for a meddlesome minx! He used to give me his mallet to keep and his nails to hold; and didn’t I fly when he called for them! and wasn’t I proud to be ordered about with them! And then, you know, there is the tall cabinet yonder; that it was that proved him the first of Edinburgh joiners, and worthy to be their Deacon and their head. And the father’s chair, and the sister’s work-box, and the dear dead mother’s footstool — what are they all but proofs of the Deacon’s skill, and tokens of the Deacon’s care for those about him?

Leslie. I am all penitence. Forgive me this last time, and I promise you I never will again.

Mary. Candidly, now, do you think you deserve forgiveness?

Leslie. Candidly, I do not.

Mary. Then I suppose you must have it. What have you done with Willie and my uncle?

Leslie. I left them talking deeply. The dear old Procurator has not much thought just now for anything but those mysterious burglaries —  —

Mary. I know! —  —

Leslie. Still, all of him that is not magistrate and official  is politician and citizen; and he has been striving his hardest to undermine the Deacon’s principles, and win the Deacon’s vote and interest.

Mary. They are worth having, are they not?

Leslie. The Procurator seems to think that having them makes the difference between winning and losing.

Mary. Did he say so? You may rely upon it that he knows. There are not many in Edinburgh who can match with our Will.

Leslie. There shall be as many as you please, and not one more.

Mary. How I should like to have heard you! What did uncle say? Did he speak of the Town Council again? Did he tell Will what a wonderful Bailie he would make? O, why did you come away?

Leslie. I could not pretend to listen any longer. The election is months off yet; and if it were not — if it were tramping up-stairs this moment — drums, flags, cockades, guineas, candidates, and all! — how should I care for it? What are Whig and Tory to me?

Mary. O, fie on you! It is for every man to concern himself in the common weal. Mr. Leslie — Leslie of the Craig! — should know that much at least.

Leslie. And be a politician like the Deacon! All in good time, but not now. I hearkened while I could, and when I could no more I slipped out and followed my heart. I hoped I should be welcome.

Mary. I suppose you mean to be unkind.

Leslie. Tit for tat. Did you not ask me why I came away? And is it usual for a young lady to say “Mr.” to the man she means to marry?

Mary. That is for the young lady to decide, sir.

Leslie. And against that judgment there shall be no appeal?

Mary. O, if you mean to argue! —  —

Leslie. I do not mean to argue. I am content to love  and be loved. I think I am the happiest man in the world.

Mary. That is as it should be; for I am the happiest girl.

Leslie. Why not say the happiest wife? I have your word, and you have mine. Is not that enough?

Mary. Have you so soon forgotten? Did I not tell you how it must be as my brother wills? I can do only as he bids me.

Leslie. Then you have not spoken as you promised?

Mary. I have been too happy to speak.

Leslie. I am his friend. Precious as you are, he will trust you to me. He has but to know how I love you, Mary, and how your life is all in your love of me, to give us his blessing with a full heart.

Mary. I am sure of him. It is that which makes my happiness complete. Even to our marriage I should find it hard to say “Yes” when he said “No.”

Leslie. Your father is trying to speak. I’ll wager he echoes you.

Mary (
to Old Brodie
). My poor dearie! Do you want to say anything to me? No? Is it to Mr. Leslie, then?

Leslie. I am listening, Mr. Brodie.

Mary. What is it, daddie?

Old Brodie. My son — the Deacon — Deacon Brodie — the first at school.

Leslie. I know it, Mr. Brodie. Was I not the last in the same class? (
To Mary.
) But he seems to have forgotten us.

Mary. O, yes! his mind is wellnigh gone. He will sit for hours as you see him, and never speak nor stir but at the touch of Will’s hand or the sound of Will’s name.

Leslie. It is so good to sit beside you. By and by it will always be like this. You will not let me speak to the Deacon? You are fast set upon speaking  yourself? I could be so eloquent, Mary — I would touch him. I cannot tell you how I fear to trust my happiness to any one else — even to you.

Mary. He must hear of my good fortune from none but me. And, besides, you do not understand. We are not like other families, we Brodies. We are so clannish, we hold so close together.

Leslie. You Brodies, and your Deacon!

Old Brodie. Deacon of his craft, sir — Deacon of the Wrights — my son! If his mother — his mother — had but lived to see!

Mary. You hear how he runs on. A word about my brother and he catches it. ‘Tis as if he were awake in his poor blind way to all the Deacon’s care for him and all the Deacon’s kindness to me. I believe he only lives in the thought of the Deacon. There, it is not so long since I was one with him. But indeed I think we are all Deacon-mad, we Brodies. — Are we not, daddie dear?

Brodie (
without, and entering
). You are a mighty magistrate, Procurator, but you seem to have met your match.

SCENE II

To these, Brodie and Lawson

Mary (
curtseying
). So, uncle! you have honoured us at last.

Lawson.
Quam primum
, my dear,
quam primum
.

Brodie. Well, father, do you know me? (
He sits beside his father, and takes his hand.
)

(Old Brodie. William — ay — Deacon. Greater man — than — his father.

Brodie. You see, Procurator, the news is as fresh to him as it was five years ago. He was struck down  before he got the Deaconship, and lives his lost life in mine.

Lawson. Ay, I mind. He was aye ettling after a bit handle to his name. He was kind of hurt when first they made me Procurator.)

Mary. And what have you been talking of?

Lawson. Just o’ thae robberies, Mary. Baith as a burgher and a Crown offeecial, I tak’ the maist absorbing interest in thae robberies.

Leslie. Egad, Procurator, and so do I.

Brodie (
with a quick look at Leslie
). A dilettante interest, doubtless! See what it is to be idle.

Leslie. ‘Faith, Brodie, I hardly know how to style it.

Brodie. At any rate, ‘tis not the interest of a victim, or we should certainly have known of it before; nor a practical tool-mongering interest, like my own; nor an interest professional and official, like the Procurator’s. You can answer for that, I suppose?

Leslie. I think I can; if for no more. It’s an interest of my own, you see, and is best described as indescribable, and of no manner of moment to anybody. (It will take no hurt if we put off its discussion till a month of Sundays.)

Brodie. You are more fortunate than you deserve. What do you say, Procurator?

Lawson. Ay is he! There’s no’ a house in Edinburgh safe. The law is clean helpless, clean helpless! A week syne it was auld Andra Simpson’s in the Lawn-market. Then, naething would set the catamarans but to forgather privily wi’ the Provost’s ain butler, and tak’ unto themselves the Provost’s ain plate. And the day, information was laid down before me offeecially that the limmers had made infraction,
vi et clam
, into Leddy Mar’get Dalziel’s, and left her leddyship wi’ no’ sae muckle’s a spune to sup her parritch wi’. It’s unbelievable, it’s awful, it’s anti-christian!

 Mary. If you only knew them, uncle, what an example you would make! But, tell me, is it not strange that men should dare such things, in the midst of a city, and nothing, nothing be known of them — nothing at all?

Leslie. Little, indeed! But we do know that there are several in the gang, and that one at least is an unrivalled workman.

Lawson. Ye’re right, sir; ye’re vera right, Mr. Leslie. It had been deponed to me offeecially that no’ a tradesman — no’ the Deacon here himsel’ — could have made a cleaner job wi’ Andra Simpson’s shutters. And as for the lock o’ the bank — but that’s an auld sang.

Brodie. I think you believe too much, Procurator. Rumour’s an ignorant jade, I tell you. I’ve had occasion to see some little of their handiwork — broken cabinets, broken shutters, broken doors — and I find them bunglers. Why, I could do it better myself.

Leslie. Gad, Brodie, you and I might go into partnership. I back myself to watch outside, and I suppose you could do the work of skill within?

Brodie. An opposition company? Leslie, your mind is full of good things. Suppose we begin to-night, and give the Procurator’s house the honours of our innocence?

Mary. You could do anything, you two!

Lawson. Onyway, Deacon, ye’d put your ill-gotten gains to a right use; they might come by the wind, but they wouldna gang wi’ the water; and that’s aye a
solatium
, as we say. If I am to be robbit, I would like to be robbit wi’ decent folk; and no’ think o’ my bonnie clean siller dirling among jads and dicers. ‘Faith, William, the mair I think on’t, the mair I’m o’ Mr. Leslie’s mind. Come the night, or come the morn, and I’se gie ye my free permission, and lend ye a hand in at the window forbye!

 Brodie. Come, come, Procurator, lead not our poor clay into temptation. (
Leslie and Mary talk apart.
)

Lawson. I’m no muckle afraid for your puir clay, as ye ca’t. But hark i’ your ear: ye’re likely, joking apart, to be gey and sune in partnership wi’ Mr. Leslie. He and Mary are gey and pack, a’body can see that.

Brodie. “Daffin, and want o’ wit” — you know the rest.

Lawson.
Vidi, scivi, et audivi
, as we say in a Sasine, William.) Man, because my wig’s pouthered do you think I havena a green heart? I was aince a lad mysel’, and I ken fine by the glint o’ the e’e when a lad’s fain and a lassie’s willing. And, man, it’s the town’s talk;
communis error fit jus
, ye ken.

Old Brodie. Oh!

Lawson. See, ye’re hurting your faither’s hand.

Brodie. Dear dad, it is not good to have an ill-tempered son.

Lawson. What the deevil ails ye at the match? ‘Od man, he has a nice bit divot o’ Fife corn-land, I can tell ye, and some Bordeaux wine in his cellar! But I needna speak o’ the Bordeaux; ye’ll ken the smack o’t as weel’s I do mysel’; onyway it’s grand wine.
Tantum et tale.
I tell ye the
pro’s
, find you the
con.’s
, if ye’re able.

Brodie. (I am sorry, Procurator, but I must be short with you.) You are talking in the air, as lawyers will. I prefer to drop the subject (and it will displease me if you return to it in my hearing).

Leslie. At four o’clock to-morrow? At my house? (
To Mary.
)

Mary. As soon as church is done. (
Exit Mary.
)

Lawson. Ye needna be sae high and mighty, onyway.

Brodie. I ask your pardon, Procurator. But we Brodies — you know our failings! (A bad temper and a humour of privacy.)

Lawson. Weel, I maun be about my business. But I could tak’ a doch-an-dorach, William;
superflua non  nocent
, as we say; an extra dram hurts naebody, Mr. Leslie.

Brodie (
with bottle and glasses
). Here’s your old friend, Procurator. Help yourself, Leslie. O no, thank you, not any for me. You strong people have the advantage of me there. With my attacks, you know, I must always live a bit of a hermit’s life.

Lawson. ‘Od, man, that’s fine; that’s health o’ mind and body. Mr. Leslie, here’s to you, sir. ‘Od, it’s harder to end than to begin with stuff like that.

SCENE III

To these, Smith and Jean, C.