Dreams of the Compass Rose (2 page)

BOOK: Dreams of the Compass Rose
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For a long time there was only a forest of darkness, of trees with winding pale limbs, of leaves rich with succulence, and everywhere living eyes that reflected the moonglow—eyes of those who populated this dark. And then, just as the first lavender shimmer began in the Eastern sky, she came out of the forest into a clearing, and upon the black ruins of something ancient and remote.

The ruins were grandiose. Their nature was that of the fabric of her most vital dream. She knew it, because they stretched for miles in all directions, as far she could see through the encroaching dawn. And yet, as light gathered, pooling onto the sky, it transformed the vista before her. Slowly, very gently, the structures took on a shape, columns shone with clean marble, walls filled out where only moments ago they had appeared to possess gaps of fallen bricks, mortar filled crevices through which the wind had slithered just at the previous heartbeat.

A sensation came to haunt her briefly. She heard ancient sand granules rubbing with a hiss against rock, and breathed a lungful of dry hot air. But quickly it was gone, to be replaced with the quickening sound of the lush forest and the moist cool breeze carried from the sea.

And when at last the first piercing shard of the sun broke through thick growth on the horizon and struck the land, Learra stood at sparkling gates of gold before a fabled living city.

It lay fully formed before her, blazing with the dawn. She saw gold-capped towers and spikes of bronze, all razor-bright. She stared in wonder at perfect veined marble, rose and lapis-blue, and at shingles of sandalwood, painted obelisks and carved winged beasts, and, in the center of all things, a structure of translucent jewel hues.

And yet there was not a living soul within this world. She walked past the gates into a place of fountains, beating in the early morning light like transparent blood from a severed vein. She wandered through streets paved with cream polished stone, underneath arches carved with words she could not read, that had never been pronounced in her lifetime. And she found herself, as the sun swept higher into the sky-dome, at the heart of this dream.

She knew it for what it was, because her own heart pounded within her, and her vision had grown absolute, all her senses having receded to supplement it.

A white luminous structure loomed, wrought with enamel jewel tones—palace, temple, or tomb. And it beckoned her to enter, its delicate archway entrance shimmering with the heat of day, warping like a mirage before her. And beyond it, from deep within—cool lilac twilight.

Learra entered, catching her breath and beginning to cough from the sudden pungent odor of ancient dried flowers. The cloying dust was everywhere, choking her, while the intensifying presence of her dream arose to make her buoyant on the inside. And yet the soles of her feet felt weighted down, heavy like stone.

She was within a domed chamber. The walls were in permanent shadow, but the remote ceiling dome was filled with central illumination that streamed in from a pattern of window skylights high overhead. Razor shafts of sun fell through the skylights upon rows of coffins of brass that reposed upon the mosaic floor.

She did not bother to count the coffins. There were over a hundred, for they filled the grand chamber. Instead, she moved deeper into the room, dragging the soles of her feet, step after step.

She coughed and breathed with distaste, her lungs rebelling at the sickening ancient sweetness. She stood like a thick-minded dull creature, unsure of what to do with herself, with this whole world around her, while long moments flowed past and time blurred.

And then, drunk on time and flowers, she started to read the markings, the incoherent shapes and symbols of an unknown language running like beads of rain past her eyes. She trod heavily and yet softly, letting her vision glide along each symbol, each plaque, striving, with constant repetition, to obtain a glimmer of meaning.

And thus she paced, while the sun slowly traveled the sky towards night, and eventually dipped beyond the skylights. With that came pale violet twilight, and then there was a sudden fall of darkness.

In the dark, she found that she could still see. Vision lost its relevance and she no longer relied on eyes to perceive, but instead the awareness that came through the pores of her skin.

Eventually vision returned. From high overhead, stars poured their remote pinpoint illuminations and gave the chamber a faint form. The coffins stretched in rows of deeper darkness than the air, and, with effort, she could make out the markings upon the brass.

It had grown dull and old again, the brass. Its luster had been stripped away with the night. And for a moment only Learra pulled herself away from her task of perception, and looked around her at the chamber itself. It, the chamber, was now but a black ruin sprawled around her, with missing sections of wall through which she could see the night outside, and hear, from far away, the tumult of forest at the ruins’ distant rim. . . .

And then, the moon rose. With the coming of moonlight, ruin receded all around her, and again she could see the glamour of solid refined form. Moonlight streamed into the skylights from above, and the writings on the plaques grew clear again, while the brass glimmered pale and polished.

And as she continued to walk among the rows of brass, she began to decipher some of the symbols, which then wound and turned and slithered into her, making sense at last.

Amarantea.
She could almost read the symbols that formed the word, she saw instances of it, etched upon metal, almost like blossoms. Here. And yet again here. . . .

Ah-mah-ran-teh-ah . . .
it whispered in her mind.

And she knew, with a surety, with a pounding of her blood, where she was, at last.

What are you, what mystery? My spirit self drowns within you, is consumed. The thirst to know calls, pulls me into you . . .

And for a moment the wind wanted to answer her, swooping down in night gusts from the windows above, whispering, whispering.

There were three coffins in the center of the chamber, somehow distinct from the rest, not in appearance but in their situation, right below the central skylight.

Learra approached this grouping, for something subtle, delicate, intimate, pulled at her. She paused before each, and read the flowing wavering symbols, seeing their pattern in the moonlight, and encountering the
other,
that pattern she had come to recognize and long for. . . .

What was within the coffins seemed to whisper her name. Or was it the wind, cool and insolent?

Open the brass lid—her thoughts taunted her with dream images—open it and release the enigma inside.

If she pried open the heavy lid on that coffin, the one on the right, would she find, within, the decayed bones of an ancient king? And would the coffin on the far left contain what had once been a woman out of legend, a queen without eyes?

And the other one, the coffin that was between them, separating them even in death unto eternity—what greatest evil could be contained within it?

The soul is a flower, severed from its stem, bearing seed, planted at birth, reaped in death, but never discarded in the bottomless well.

What sin had been committed here, in this relic of a sepulcher, within a ruined place at the end of the world? What curse of madness, of unfulfilled desire, slithered about the ruins at night, and revealed their true stagnation only with the retreat of light?

Or—did it thus also show their greatest truth?

Where was it, the beast that has no name, the one that can only be seen when it sleeps?

The ruins stirred in their own bottomless slumber all around Learra. But the beast without a name tugged at her nature, her innards, her fear, urging her and yet pulling her back, seductive in its caution, always but one step away, just out of sight, at the edge of her living dream. . . .

And she knew then, with a sinking, a gentle sadness, that if she were to follow her final desire—the one that pulled at her, that called upon her to open the coffins one by one and thus reveal the final mystery—then she would find out something that was not human, was not hers to know.

Dare to know!
wailed the night.
You, who seek, you must achieve that what has driven you all your life.
 . . .

And Learra stretched out her hand with its callused work-palm, and trembling, touched the cold bronze metal of the center casket before her.

Do it . . .
Whispers came from all recesses of her mind.
Proceed, or you will die in madness.
 . . .

The brass handle of the coffin was circular, made to fit her palm exactly. The heavy lid had probably jammed with time; lifting it will require inordinate effort.

Do it . . . This is the one purpose of your life.

And yet she thought, pausing with her trembling fingers locked in an embrace upon brass. And she thought of her life, looked back suddenly, and saw in retrospect something akin to a flower that had developed from a seed, and had grown along a fine stem of experience, and had been cut promptly upon maturation, and now awaited its next stage.

The hand that held the flower was now poised on the brink of a decision. That decision could return the flower back to a familiar place where it could be pollinated and harvested of its seed. Or else the hand could take it far, into a place dark and unsure, into a place without fertile soil, without bottom, or end, outside the world. . . .

The choice was before her, in the form of desire.

Learra looked at the inscription on the coffin of brass, at the ancient coffin itself that lay before her like a lover.

She knew the words that were inscribed there without having to read that ancient tongue. She had known for the greater part of her life, and the words had become a part of her. The words, whispering within her. The words, shimmering like mother-of-pearl in her inner vision, every night before sleep would take her by the lashes. . . .

And the woman let go of the brass, told her fingers to let go, to unclench from their passionate embrace with the possibility of death before her.

While she did so, the moon continued to spill itself softly through the sky window into the sepulcher, over the black ruins, over the island that was half-real, half-desire, over the whole world. And because she had let go, and stepped away, the wind sighed softly, and died in a final echo of a whisper.

Learra never remembered walking outside, nor climbing through the desolate ruins of something precious that had long gone. She only remembered the living darkness of the forest, the tenebrous foliage, and the everpresent moonlight, streaking her path, spilling before her like thick silver honey.

Learra came out of the forest onto the shore just as dawn began to discolor the rim of the horizon over the ocean. Off the shore floated the black silhouette of the anchored ship, a great palm ready to sweep her away, to carry her back to the familiar world.

She paused, stepping into the cold running foam that exuded phosphorescence, that licked the ebony sand. She looked down, seeing again the pattern of her footsteps imprinted in the black sands of this dream shore, a pattern that would fill with eddies of water as soon as the next wave hit, that would soon be dissolved into a furrow, then nothing.

No traces of her would remain here, in this other place. . . .

With the dawn, a wind was rising from the sea. Learra turned around, placing her back to it, and facing for the last time the blackness, then the indigo, then the violet of the quickly lightening land. As she stood thus, buffeted by the gusts, she looked far into the shore line, deep into the forest, where she could see with her mind’s eye that which had called her here.

She was leaving it now.

Tears stood for a moment in her eyes, but were soon to be dried by the wind. But then—how to distinguish the wetness of tears from the moisture of sea spray on one’s face, from the very mist?

Learra turned away then, and, without looking back, waded into the cold water, black as ink, and swam toward the ship.

On the shore, the light was solidifying, falling all around from the brightening sky. And a form took shape, pale and indescribable in human words. The form moved like a ghost, stood looking out toward the sea’s expanse, leaving its own pattern of footprints.

It was growing still and somnolent and alone once again. Its task was accomplished. And so, the beast without a name lay down to sleep, and in its dreams to guard, lulled once again by the silence, lulled by the ocean and the drifting soft black sand of Amarantea.

 

I
n radiant glory, bright like the oldest wisdom, exists Amarantea. . . .

It is a dream only, a living memory in the collective consciousness, and yet it beckons the wanderer, always, from its unknown shore. . . .


Tell the story, please, Grandmother!” the little girl cried, tugging at the old woman’s sleeve.


Yes, please, tell us again of the king and his blind wife!” echoed the little boy.

The old woman, who had once had a sharp seeking gaze but now was almost blind, drew her wizened head closer to the two children.


Now, now, children,” Grandmother said with a smile. “What is there to tell? Why do you pester me so, my little Rinne?”

BOOK: Dreams of the Compass Rose
13.27Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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