Authors: Ebony Lowe
The next day, mama woke me up asking me to go somewhere with her. Last time she did that, I ended up at the crazy doctor with the family’s disgrace. Wonder what she had planned today.
“Ma, I hope we not going back to that crazy doctor, I ain’t tryna hear nothing her or Kita gotta say!” I said.
“No, we are not going back to her. Besides, think you left a bad taste in her mouth. I don’t think she will want to counsel us again.” Mama laughed.
“Well it ain’t my fault. I told the truth. Sometimes mama, the truth hurts. If ya can’t stand the heat then stay out the kitchen, and if she couldn’t take what I said, which had nothing to do with her, then she don’t need to be a psychiatrist.”
“Girl, what am I gone do with you and your mouth!”
“I’m not the one that you have to worry bout mama, it’s that spawn of satan that you birthed that you need to worry bout.”
Mama just shook her head. Guess she ain’t have nothing else to say. I mean what more could she say? She knew it was the truth, she just didn’t want to say it.
We pulled up to Christ Hospital. Why we were there, I had no clue. I asked her but she told me to just go with it.
“Mama, I ain’t got time for no shenanigans!” I told her.
She gave me that look! You know that look your mama give you when you cross the line. Yea, that one! Of course she only had to look at me once for me to get the picture. Mama ain’t raise no fool.
When we walked in, I saw Kita standing there with a nurse waving at us. Not again I thought. I wanted to say something, but I had already said too much. This right here, I was so tired of. Why in God’s name does she keep dragging me and only me along with her to Kita’s appointments? I don’t want nothing to do with that girl or her fetus. I don’t understand why I am being forced to be in the same place with her, but then when I snap on her I’m in the wrong. It’s a conspiracy that’s what it is!
“Ma you gotta be kidding me!” I exclaimed! “Again?”
“Relax Riyah, the only reason I brought you with me is because I haven’t been feeling good and I was scared I wouldn’t be able to drive myself. I knew your dad wouldn’t have came.”
I looked closely at my mama and could tell she was sick. She didn’t look like herself. She looked old and tired…worn out. I blame Kita for putting all this stress on her and my family. If she wasn’t the family whore, mama would be ok.
Regardless of what mama said, I was still forced to sit through Kita’s ultrasound.
“Would you like to know the sex of your babies?” The nurse asked.
“Scuse me you said babies, as in more than one?” I asked
“Yes, she is carrying fraternal twins. This one right here is a girl, and this one, this one looks to be a boy!”
“Oh you gotta be kidding me! It’s two of those things! Ewwwe!” I yelled.
“MARIYAH!!!!” mama yelled at me
“I’m sorry mama but the thought of one of em is enough, now there’s two of em. Ya’ll letting her bring two of those things in this world?”
“Riyah, please don’t talk about my babies like that” Kita said in a soft spoken voice.
All of a sudden she was trying to act like a “good girl”, like a “innocent person”. Did she forget that she is pregnant by our UNCLE! Maybe she need to go back to the crazy doctor cuz this girl is a lunatic.
“Girl, please don’t talk to me at all” I responded
“Here we go again!” She said.
“Would you like me to leave you all alone for a minute?” the nurse asked.
“No you’re fine. I’ll leave. I’m sorry but I can’t be around dogs and its young, I’m allergic to it all, it makes my skin crawl. Mama I love you but you keep putting me in this situation and expect me to be ok with it but I’m not and I don’t think I will ever be. I’m gonna have Jeremiah come pick me up. I can’t be around her any longer.” I said as I kissed mama on the cheek and left out.
I sat in the waiting room and waited for J to pick me up. I couldn’t help but to notice the pain on mama’s face. She looked so hurt and tired and weak. Everything was taking a toll on her, but she refused to sit down and let it all go. I needed to have a sit down heart to heart with daddy. Something had to be done and soon. I couldn’t stand to see mama like that any longer.
On the way home, I kept quiet, stuck in my thoughts about mama. How bad she looked. Mama hadn’t aged much throughout her life, but now she was looking every bit of her age plus some. What could I do to make her feel better? I could stop being a bitch to Kita, but that would make me hate myself. I can’t pretend to like someone knowing deep down I despise their guts. I literally dislike the air she breaths, the space that she takes up, and the ground she walks on. Yea I know, I shouldn’t feel like that, but tell me how am I supposed to feel after what she did. There is no amount of forgiveness in the world that could make me forget the pain she caused my family. I forgive her because that’s what GOD wants me to do, but forget…? I could never do that.
hear J talking to me but I was so deep into my thoughts that I have no clue as to what he was saying. He knew too, because he asked me was I listening to him. Before I could respond my phone rang. Saved by the bell!
“Riyah” a voice said on the other end of the phone.
“Who is this?” I responded.
“Why are you calling me, I have nothing left to say to you.”
“Riyah shut up and listen! Its mama!” she struggled so hard to find the words to say it. “Mama sick”
“Look stop playing on my phone.” I snapped “Mama ain’t sick fool, I just left ya’ll remember.”
“Riyah, Mama passed out after you left. She hit her head on the end of the hospital bed as she fell down. Riyah, mama’s in a coma. Call daddy and get back here! I don’t know what to do”
“WHAT!?!?!?!” I yelled! “Take me back to the hospital NOW! Hurry up!” I yelled at J. He gave me a confused look but didn’t hesitate to do a u-turn in the middle of traffic to get me back to the hospital. I instantly hung up on Kita and called daddy.
“Daddy, where are you?” I cried to him.
“Home, what’s wrong are you ok?” He asked hearing the pain in my voice.
“Daddy, its mama! You need to meet me at the hospital NOW!
“What?, What are you talking about? What hospital? Where is your mother?” he asked not comprehending what I was saying.
“Daddy, listen to me! Mama passed out at Christ Hospital and hit her head on the end of the hospital bed, she’s in a coma. Daddy come quick!” I cried.
Before I could say anything else, the phone went dead on the other end. I knew that meant he was on his way. I was so discombobulated that I couldn’t think straight. I didn’t know who to call, what to do, what to say, I just know I needed to be with my mama.
As we pulled up to the hospital, I didn’t give him a chance to stop the car. I jumped out while he was slowing down and ran
into the hospital screaming Kita’s name. When I found her, she sat me down and tried to calm me down but I wasn’t really trying to hear her. I just wanted to see my mama and know that she was going to be ok. Seemed like only seconds later, Daddy, J and his parents, Mel, DJ, and Auntie Lynne were all there waiting to hear from the doctor. I don’t even remember them all getting there. I just remember feeling someone’s hand on my back and shoulder and feeling J grab and hold my hand tight. Didn’t realize it then, but that was the first time everyone was in the room with Kita since everything happened. None of that mattered at that time. We were all scared and thinking the worst. When the nurse finally came out to tell us that the Dr. wanted to speak to us all and for us to go into the family conference room, we all began to shake. I held daddy’s hand tight as I thought to myself, “this cannot be good”. Finally the doctor walked in. Nothing could have prepared us for what he was about to tell us.
“Jacobs family?” he asked.
“Yes, how is my wife? What happened? Is she going to be alright?” daddy asked with tears in his eyes
“Mr. Jacobs, please have a seat” the doctor said ushering daddy to his chair. Daddy looked like he was going to fall out or something. You could tell by the look on the dr.’s face that he was worried about him to.
“Mrs. Jacobs suffered a stroke. She also, as you may know, hit her head on the end of the hospital bed and also as she hit the floor. This caused more trauma in her brain and caused it to bleed and swell. Right now, she is in a coma, and we are running a series of tests to help us decide if surgery is needed. I want you to be aware that the next 24 to 48 hours are very critical. We have transferred her to ICU where she will be on constant watch. Right now she seems to be breathing ok on her own and that is a very good sign. We have her on oxygen just to help her out a little bit. We are doing everything we can to make sure she is comfortable and not in any pain. The next 48 hours are up to her. She seems to be a fighter and a strong person, so I am hoping she will fight her way through this. Surgery is an option and may be performed but right now it would be very dangerous with the swelling of her brain. All we can do now is hope and pray!”
“Thank you doctor” J’s mother said as she reached to shake his hand. Everyone else was speechless and in tears. I couldn’t believe this had happened to my mama, the backbone of our family. She couldn’t possibly think we could make it without her.
“I want to see her” daddy said wiping tears from his face.
“Of course! Once they are finished with the last test, which should be any minute now, you may come back and sit with her.
The nurse will come out and get you. Unfortunately, we can only allow two people at a time.”
“Will she know we there” I asked as tears filled my eyes
“It’s possible. Talk to her, let her know how much you love her. Hold her hand, kiss her. It may help to make her respond.”
As I watched the doctor walk out the room, I realized daddy was an emotional wreck. As much as my heart hurt, daddy’s heart seemed to hurt the most. Nobody knew what was going to happen. This was so unexpected. Mama was the most healthiest person of us all. How in the world could she be so sick? KITA!!!
5 months later…
Mama is almost back to normal. She put a big scare in us but turned out to be ok. She suffered a mild stroke, but most of the damage came from her hitting her head. She had to have surgery to stop the bleeding, which caused her to have to learn to walk and talk all over again. She’s walking with a cane now and has a bit of a speech problem but doctors expect her to heal just fine. Thank GOD! I don’t know what I’d do without my mama, and I damn sure ain’t trying to find out no time soon.
Auntie Lynne, DJ, Mel, and Bradley moved into their own house right next door to us. Auntie Lynne took Dre to divorce court and won alimony and child support. Dre is living in a motel because he can’t afford to pay Auntie Lynne and pay all of his bills. I guess karma bit him in the butt big time. They sold their house because Auntie Lynne didn’t want to live in it anymore and the judge gave her all of the profits and she split the money with us. Mama and daddy didn’t want to take it but she wouldn’t take no for an answer. I think it was her way of
apologizing to us for putting us through so much when she went missing. DJ gave up his apartment and moved back home. We were happy to have our big brother back home. He still goes to school, he just refuses to leave his mama side because everybody is scared she may have a flash back or something and disappear again. Mama and daddy are back like old times. Seems like they are more in love with each other than they were before if that’s even possible. Mama still helps Kita even though daddy is totally against it. Hell, everybody is except her. I guess that’s why a mother’s love is so special. She got her a job and a studio apartment and she’s due any day now. I still haven’t forgiven her nor do I plan to. Mama keeps trying to push in my face that I’m going to be an Auntie but to be honest, I don’t want no parts of those kids lives. In fact, I don’t care to see them or her for that matter. Jeremiah and I are still together. We broke our promise to our parents and “did the do” on my 17
birthday. Oh don’t worry, we haven’t told them, and don’t plan to although I’m sure they know cuz they aint stupid, and as daddy always say, they wasn’t born yesterday. Mel and I are still very close. She rarely comes out any more. I think she depressed or something. She stays under Auntie Lynne. Her and DJ are so protective over Auntie now, they don’t let her leave without one of them being with her. Mama and Auntie Lynne are super close now. They call each other for everything. Its kind of annoying but it’s the same thing me and Mel do so I don’t know why it annoys me so much. Dre sent a letter to daddy stating that he didn’t believe the kids were his and he wanted to have it set in place to have a DNA test done as soon as they were born. Apparently, word around town is not only is Kita the family’s whore, she’s also the town whore. At least that’s what Dre thinks. I haven’t heard anything like that. Personally, I think he just don’t want to claim those kids cuz he can’t afford no more child support.
Daddy still hasn’t allowed Kita back in the house and I can’t blame him. He thinks of her as “the crap beneath his shoes”. He told mama she wasn’t his child and that she belonged to the devil because only the devil would do what she did. Mama has been trying to get him to forgive her but it ain’t working.
She keeps throwing GOD and the bible in it saying we gotta forgive and all that crap. I forgave her. Oh hush, you don’t know me! I did forgive her. Now forgetting is a hole nother topic. Mama say we can’t judge her, but I ain’t judging her. If you a hoe you a hoe, and she is truly a hoe. I think Auntie Lynne finally talked to her, but I don’t know what was said. She is kind of like mama so I’m sure she forgave her.