Raven (3 page)

Garrett grabs my hand and I try to ignore the electric current racing up my arm, down my spine and straight to my belly. I’ve never been tasered before, but it probably feels just like this. Weaving through the rest of the students making their way through the parking lot, Garrett stops at a lifted, black pickup truck. For the life of me, I’m not sure how I’m going to get inside this beast.

“Need some help?”

“If you want me to get in this thing, then yeah, I’m gonna need some help.” Before my brain has time to catch up to what’s going on, Garrett grabs hold of my hips, hoists me up and into the cab.

As I bunch my skirt between my knees, Garrett shuts the door, leaving me alone. I wait for him to enter and my thoughts are racing wildly through my head. How did he afford such a nice truck? Does he have a girlfriend? Does he know about my mom? Does he think I’m pretty? Can he tell I’m attracted to him? These aren’t the thirteen-year-old feelings I used to have for Garrett. We’re already at the “I woke up for some water and Mom left Cinemax playing in the living room and I got an eyeful, I might need to jump you now” feelings.

Unable to answer any of the above questions, he climbs into the truck, fires it to life and takes off out of the parking lot like he owns the damn thing.
Speeding down the road, we’re a good five minutes from the school before Garrett opens his mouth to speak.

“You’re lookin’ real good, Rian.”

“Thanks. You too,” I respond, trying to hide my crimson cheeks from his view.

“Where ya staying? You and your mom just move to town?” He has no idea what’s happened. One of a billion questions has been answered.

“Yeah and no. My mom died. I’m living down here with my Aunt Elaine.” Garrett’s face drops and he fumbles for a minute until he can find his words.

“I’m real sorry, Ri. What happened?”

“Can we not talk about that right now? I wanna know what you’ve been up to.”

“Been living here since Dad got transferred a couple years back. I start on the
basketball team and work part-time at the deli across town. Nothing real exciting.”

I shift nervously in my seat, wanting to ask about any romance in his life, but can’t find a way to find out without prying. If he wants to tell me, he will.

“I’m really digging the new look. When I left you were all about what the other girls were wearing. It’s cool to see you come into your own.” Turning my head toward the window, I let a small smile crack—the only one that’s shown since before everything with Tom happened. It feels real nice.

“Thanks. I like it
, too. Feels more like me, you know?”

“Yeah. You always did like the way your mom dressed. You look just like her.” Quickly realizing that he’s talking about my mom again, he shuts his mouth and shakes his head. “I’m sorry. It’s just weird that she’s not here. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

I don’t even realize that tears have started to pool in my eyes, glazing them over. “It’s fine. These are her clothes. When I left home, I didn’t want to be the same girl I had been before. Worrying about what the latest trends are just to fit in was never me. I had to make due when you left. It was hard without you,” I whisper, wishing I could take it back.

“If I didn’t have to leave, I never would have. You know that, right? You were my best friend.”

“I know if you didn’t have to, you wouldn’t have. It wasn’t pleasant. For so long, I had you to protect me from the wolves, and then one day you were gone. I’m happy to see you again, though.”

“What do you say we make up for some lost time?” Garrett asks with a devilish grin. I know that look and exactly what he’s planning on doing.

“There’s a lake nearby?” I’m not familiar with the area, only having come here a few times when I was younger, but he has to know it like the back of his hand by now.

“Yep. You up for it?”

“I ain’t no chicken. Let’s go.”

Garrett makes a sharp turn on a side street, taking the gravel road all the way down until I see water peeking from behind the trees. When we were younger, we
used to swim in the lake by our house, lying out on his parents’ pontoon until the stars came out. It was our thing.

Parking on the grass a few yards from the lake, Garrett’s first out of the truck with me hot on his heels. It’s an unspoken rule that the last one in is a rotten egg, and I promise you, a rotten egg I am not. Knowing that I’ll probably drown in this skirt, I wiggle out of it, thankful for the boy shorts I’m wearing today, and let the cotton puddle at my feet. Stepping over the skirt, Garrett’s still wrestling with his shoes when I hit the water full speed and dive under.

“Hey, cheater. You still got clothes on,” Garrett shouts from the bank.

“It’s not my fault that you’re wearing more than me. Skirt and flip flops come off in much less time than sneakers and jeans.” Dipping my head back to get the hair out of my face, Garrett finally gets his shoes off and starts working on his jeans.

Nothing could have prepared me for the sight I was about to see. Unbuttoning his pants and letting the zipper down, he lets the denim drop to his ankles. His muscular thighs are barely hidden by the tight boxer briefs he’s wearing underneath. Pulling his shirt over his head, Garrett’s abs glisten in the late afternoon sun.

Licking my lips, I have to remind myself that when I last
saw Garrett, he was a fifteen-year-old, lanky boy with no muscle tone whatsoever. This man before me … he’s got muscle on top of muscle and it’s downright the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. I make sure that when Garrett finally makes his way into the water I keep my chest below the surface to hide my ever present hardened nipples. I could always lie and say the water’s cold, but he’d know I’m a damn liar.

“Race you out to the buoy and back?” Garrett takes off ahead of me, leaving me in his wake. Kicking off the bottom
, it doesn’t take me long to catch up and pass him. He should know better. If there’s one thing that I’ve always done better than him, it’s swim.

As expected, I reach the marker first, holding myself afloat and taking in large gulps of air. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a workout like this. The laps they made us run in cheer practice can’t compare to swimming a quarter-mile at full speed.

“Looks like you can still kick my ass,” Garrett chuckles when he reaches the buoy.

“Don’t you ever forget it,” I respond, splashing water in his face. Spitting out what got in his mouth, he tries to dunk me under, but again, I’m much smarter and quicker than him. Dodging out of the way, I start making my way back to the bank.

Forgetting that I’m only wearing a tank top and a pair of boy shorts, I lie on the warm sand and take in the sun while waiting for Garrett to make it back. Closing my eyes and putting my arm over my face, I don’t notice the shadow that’s probably cast over me when he’s hovering above me. It’s his sharp intake of breath that startles me back to reality.

Moving my arm and squinting my eyes, I peek out at Garrett who looks lost in his own mind. “Why are you just standing there? You’re blocking my sun.”

“I just … wow. You really grew up these last couple years.” Taking a seat next to me, I start thinking heavily about what he’s just said.
What does he mean that I’ve grown up?
Did he expect me to stay thirteen forever?
I mean, I turned fourteen a few days after he left, but how much can one really grow in such a short amount of time?

“What are you talking about?”

“Have you looked at yourself lately?”

“Every morning when I get ready.”

“Well, maybe it’s me that’s just now looking at you.”

Chapter
5

The next two weeks go
by painlessly. Starting a new school and making new friends should have been more difficult, but Garrett’s been there the whole time. He’s introduced me to the group he hangs with, and for the most part, they’re pretty nice. All except Valerie.

After our first awkward encounter, I asked Garrett what her deal was. Apparently they dated for a few months when he first moved here. I assume she has a thing for him, or a thing against anyone else who might.

I still haven’t managed to come up with the nerves to ask Garrett about our time at the lake. I’m almost positive he was flirting with me, but who knows. I heard enough from my mom when I was younger that guys aren’t always the best clue droppers and more times than not give off false cues.

Garrett’s also taken over picking me up and dropping me off after school. I tried the whole
, “It’s okay, Elaine has no problem doing it”. That didn’t go over well, especially when he walked me in on the second day to introduce himself to Elaine. Now all I hear from her is, “Garrett’s such a nice boy” or “You should keep him around for a while.” I can’t win with these two. I’m officially out numbered.

“You ready to go?” Garrett sneaks up behind me at my locker, putting his arm around my shoulders. To the passerby, it could appear that we’re more than just friends.
I hug him around the waist and attempt to walk away, only his hold tightens, pulling me closer into his chest and he starts to walk down the hallway, forcing me to follow. Thankfully, no matter how hard he works out in his gym class, he always smells amazing. You have to give it to a boy that knows exactly what cologne to buy and how to use it properly.

Speaking of those who don’t understand that cologne is not to be bathed in, Eli, Garrett’s friend walks up to us, blocking our path to the student parking lot.

“Hey, G. And Rian, how are you?”

Garret
t nods and I respond, “Good, thanks.”

“I was thinking.
There’s a game Friday night. Garrett’s gonna be playing, so if you’d like to go, I can take you.” I think I’ve just been asked on a date.

Looking up at Garrett, his jaw twitches and his hold on me tightens even more. If I wasn’t dealing with the opposite sex here, I would think he’s not happy about this proposal. Wanting to test my theory and see if Garrett actually does have a slight crush on me, I accept the offer from Eli.

“Yeah. Sounds like fun. There’s a bonfire later too, right? I haven’t been to one in ages.” Trying to breathe through my mouth so I don’t smell his overdose of body spray is a futile effort because now I can
taste
it. Twisting my mouth into a smile, I start walking, still with Garrett’s arm wrapped around me. “Give me a call when you’re on your way Friday. I’ll see you then.”

“Wow. Okay. That was easier than I thought.” Eli’s eyes light up like the Fourth of July and he allows Garrett and
me to pass.

“All you
had to do was ask,” I say, meaning it more for Garrett than Eli, but it works for either.

When we reach the truck, Garrett doesn’t come around to my side to help me in.
Weird.
Bracing myself and using every ounce of upper body strength I have, I lift myself into the cab. We don’t make it out of the lot before the questioning starts.

“What was that about back there with Eli?”

“He seems like a nice guy and asked me to a basketball game. I mean, it sounds like fun. I’ve never been to a game that I haven’t cheered at. It’ll be nice to be able to sit and actually watch.” That’s the truth. I love the game and used to enjoy cheering, but always wanted to just watch the players on the court. It was never an option for a cheerleader.

“And the bonfire?” Garrett seethes.

“You told me about it yesterday. I figure if I’m going to the game, I should get the full experience. Unless it’s invite only and I totally fucked up.” Starting to feel like the outsider I had forgotten I am, my cheeks heat with embarrassment. What if I just invited Eli somewhere even
I
wasn’t welcome?

“That’s not it, Rian. Anyone can go to the bonfire. I don’t know why you’re going on a date with Eli Barton.” Garrett shakes his head in disbelief but never takes his eyes off the road.

“What would you rather me do, Garrett? Hang out with you and you alone? Not make any new friends? Not date? I’m kinda confused.” Much like my mother used to be, I’m a free spirit. I have some serious control issues, especially since what happened.

“You’re with me all the time, yet you accept a date from someone else. Rian, what do you think we’re doing here?”
Slapping the dashboard, he cuts the wheel hard, sending me flying into his side.

“I’m trying to get home in one piece. What the hell is wrong with you? The only
guy who’s shown me any interest and I’m supposed to ignore it? Sorry, Garrett, that’s not how it works. I’m a woman. I’d like to have at least
one
date before I graduate.”

“
The only guy who’s shown you any interest
, my ass. If you want to go on a date, Rian, I’ll take you on a date.”

Whoa. What the hell just happened here? Is he jealous? Theory proven … I think.

“Thanks for the offer, but I’d rather go out with someone who actually wants to date me, not someone who’s offering me a date out of pity.”
Let that one sink in, Garrett.

Garrett slams on the brakes and throws the truck in park. Looking ahead once I regain my bearings, I realize we’re at the lake. Taking off his seatbelt, he exits the truck, leaving my mind reeling.
What in the hell is he doing?

Climbing down, I follow him all the way to the water’s edge when he turns to face me, grabbing hold of my biceps. “There would be no pity in a date with you, Rian.
My first day of high school, the first day we were really apart, I knew I wanted to be more than your friend. I wanted to date you, but that’s not possible at fourteen, now is it? When you came back in my life, I thought it could be a second chance. I wanted to give you some time to deal with everything—moving here, your mom’s death and adjusting. I’ve been very vocal about how beautiful you are, how much you’ve grown, but you just don’t see it.”

Swallowing hard, he starts to gently rub my exposed arms with
his thumbs. Staring deeply into my eyes, my heart’s beating a mile a minute waiting for him to tell me where all of this is going. “I’d very much like to take you on a date. Ten dates. For you to not date anyone else. I’d like you to go to the game and bonfire with me, not Eli. I’d like to be your boyfriend, Rian.”

If it’s possible to swoon, that’s exactly what I’m doing. He’s got me exactly where he wants me. Aft
er everything he’s said, there are no words to show him I feel the exact same. I’ve loved Garrett since the moment he saved me from the bullies.

Standing on my tip toes, I grab the back of his head and pull him down to me, softly kissing his full lips that taste like absolute heaven. Garrett retreats, holding me at arms
’ length, just staring at me. “Are you sure?”

“Listen to me. I’ve always wanted to be
your girlfriend, but you never gave me any indication that you felt the same way. I wasn’t about to ruin our friendship over my feelings. I need you in my life too much for that. When Eli asked, and you didn’t say anything, I thought it was because you weren’t interested. I’ll call Eli later and tell him that I won’t be going to this game, or any other games, with him.”

“So you’ll be my girlfriend?” The most adorable grin spreads across his lips, almost childlike, so full of glee and unadulterated happiness.

For the second time today, my response is the same. “All you had to do was ask.”

****

Friday morning at school, I’m surprised to find a gift bag in my locker. Setting my backpack on the floor and the books in my hand on the top shelf, I remove the tissue paper only to have a white jersey with red lettering stare back at me. Pulling it out of the bag, the red number four on the back makes my heart flutter.
Garrett’s away jersey.

As tears spring to my eyes, Garrett rounds the corner with a few of his
basketball buddies, wearing his home jersey—identical in every way to the one in my hands, except it’s red with white lettering. As he passes by me, he winks and blows a small air kiss. Not wasting any time, I pull the jersey over my head, over my tank top, and silently send thanks to my mom in Heaven for not allowing me to wear a skirt today.

Even after everything nasty I said, you still look out for me. Thank you.

At my last school, it was common practice for the girlfriends of the players to wear their jersey, either home or away depending on the location of the game that night. Since I never really dated, I never got to experience this. And this … it feels fantastic.

Walking down the hall to my class just before lunch, I run smack into Valerie. I mean, really, if looks could kill
, she would have killed me and brought me back to life just so she could do it all over again. This girl is not my biggest fan and I’d do well to just ignore her. Regardless of her feelings for Garrett, it’s me he chose. It’s me who’s loved him since I was a little girl. She’s just going to have to kick rocks.

Thankfully
, I don’t have to see her the rest of the day and it’s not long before the final bell of the day rings. Meeting Garrett in our usual spot, he stops in front of me, urging me to get on his back. I ride piggy-back the entire way to his truck and he deposits me safely in the passenger seat.

“Even though Coach is mad at me, he’s letting me start tonight. Since you have experience in cheering, I’m gonna need you in those stands screaming my name.”
Oh, all the ways I could take that.

“
Your
name’s the
only
one I wanna scream,” I respond, winking. “Why’s Coach mad? Did you screw up in practice or something?”

“No, I didn’t screw up. I’m always perfect. Haven’t you met me?”

“Well then, what happened? Are you too perfect for him? Is he jealous of your mad basketball skills? Maybe he thinks you want his job after you graduate.”

“No,” he laughs. “I’ve been missing a half hour of practice every day to drive you home. He was pretty pissed, but I’m still the best player he has and he knows it. And there’s no way for me to take
his job. I won’t be around next season.”

“Wait, you’ve been missing time so I had a ride home
? Elaine could have picked me up or I could have ridden the bus!” I yell, startling him.

“That’s not the point. I’m not having my girl ride the bus. Coach can get over it. He did actually. I stay an hour later than the other guys and spend time on the weekends practicing. Like I said, I’m the best he has.”

“Whatever. That’s not the point. You shouldn’t be going out of your way for me. What if you miss practice and screw up in a game? You won’t get any scholarships.” Worry crosses my face.
What if I’ve cost him his future?
There’s no doubt that if he’s the best the school has, he’ll have scouts hounding him.

“It’s fine, Rian. I don’t need a scholarship.”

“Are your grades that good? I don’t remember you being the class genius, Garrett.”

“Ri, I’m going to the Army. I enlisted a few months ago and I leave for basic about a
week after graduation.” I feel like he’s just hit me with a ton of bricks. Why did he wait so long to tell me he was leaving? And for the Army no less. I know he’s from a military family, but hell, shouldn’t he have told me this?

“I don’t know what to say,” I whisper, lost in my own thoughts. He’s going to leave me just like everyone else did. What if he goes to war and dies? What if he finds a new girl and I’m left here wishing he’d come back to me?
What if everything goes to shit when he leaves like last time?

“There’s nothing much to say, really. I always knew I’d enlist. It’s kind of a
rite of passage in my house. As soon as I turned eighteen, I met with them and signed the papers. I’d already be gone, but you have to have a high school diploma.”

“What about us?” I can’t believe I’m being so selfish right now, but
dammit, I’ve waited all these years to feel an ounce of what I do when I’m with him, and in a few short months he’s going to be gone. Boyfriend or not, being back in each other’s lives only confirms that everything seems to be better when he’s around.

“You’ll be here. After you graduate next year, we can figure out where to go from there. I’m hoping I get stationed somewhere
nearby after basic, but that’s no guarantee. We’ve gone three years apart and we picked up where we left off. Another year isn’t going to matter. I’m still your boyfriend and you’re still my girlfriend. ”

“You don’t think it’s going to matter?” I scream
in frustration, throwing my hands in the air and hitting my knuckles on the roof of the truck. “You think I can go back to missing you? Missing the person I am when we’re together? Not having you by my side? Not kissing you whenever I want to? You think it’s going to be that easy?”

“What do you think would happen if I went off to college? It’s no different. Some of the scouts that want me are from schools in Michigan and Indiana. You gonna drive six hours just to kiss me? No, you wouldn’t. I’ve always had this future planned out for me. I’m sorry if it hurts your feelings, but this
is life, Rian. It’s what I have to do.” I don’t think he’s trying to be an ass or make me sad. He’s probably frustrated like me. Still, it hurts.