Shadow of Hope: Book 4 - Shadow Series (2 page)

As the Armstrongs walked from their buggy to Grace Church, the sun was already glaring down on them.  “It’s going to be another scorcher,” Jonas said, shielding his eyes from the sun. 

“Maybe Zoe will want swim in your father’s pond today,” Ivy said.

“And we’ll fight over who gets to swim with her, and who gets to watch Joanna?” Jonas asked.

“Precisely,” Ivy said, with a smile.

They walked up the church steps, Zoe between them, all of them holding hands.

Standing across the road, a man watched them slyly from behind a tree.  He slid into view, after the Armstrongs went into the church, walked slowly across the street, and entered the church.  He slipped into a back row seat and watched the Armstrongs.  He wondered how he could possible get closer.  Being colored made his opportunities slim to none.  There were very few colored families in Abilene, and that made him stand out. 

He’d been watching them for weeks already.  Was she never left alone?  How could he get a closer look and perhaps speak with her?

Violet sat in the second row of the church with her mother, while her two sisters, Rose and Ivy, sat with their families, Ivy with Jonas and Zoe, and Rose with Quinn.  Both of their infants were home with their nannies. Violet watched as Jonas and his family slipped into the front row, on the left side of the church, near the new organ, since Jonas was the director of music for the church, and a fantastic musician and singer.  She watched him slip behind the new organ and begin to play a hymn softly.

Then Violet noticed Jonas’s brother, Caleb, and his, wife Julia, sit down beside Ivy, who moved over to make room for them.  She noticed Zoe get up and wiggle between her mother and Uncle Caleb, and they exchanged smiles.   Caleb put his arm around Zoe.  Violet thought Caleb would make a wonderful father, but so far, Julia hadn’t shown any signs of increasing. 

She saw Miles come in and sit beside his sister, Julia. He looked handsome in his white shirt and black pants.  The congregation relaxed their dress code in the summer. The men didn’t wear jackets or ties while the women left their large hats at home and carried fans instead.

Violet sighed.  Miles was indeed handsome, but did she love him—really love him?  Sometimes his overbearing love for her made her feel driven to take a step or two backward, and away from him.  She sometimes felt smothered.

Gavin, in Salina, was just a friend at this point.  He was handsome, but in a different way.  He was older—she guessed him to be about twenty-eight or twenty-nine.  His wife had died of pneumonia when Timothy McKenzie, their son, was about three.  Timothy was a disruptive and overly energetic child.  She cringed when she thought about having him for a son, but his father was so likeable. 

The music grew louder. She watched as the new Reverend’s family took their seats in the front row, where she’d once sat when her father had been the minister.   How she missed him. She wondered why God had taken him home so young—he had only been fifty-five when he passed.

The new minister, John Martin, had five children, the oldest of which was twenty, and the youngest was just a toddler.  He and his family now lived in the house her family had once lived in.  She wondered where they put all those children, as the house wasn’t all that big.

Her mother, Lavinia Jeffries was in her fifties, and still an attractive woman. Violet wondered if she’d ever remarry.  Her thoughts were suddenly interrupted when the organ began to play the opening for the first hymn, and the minister made his appearance.  He signaled for them to rise, and the service began with the singing of the first song.

During the sermon, Violet thought about how she might escape after church without Miles noticing and trying to stop her.  She wasn’t yet ready for the scene she knew would ensue when she broke off their betrothal.  She hoped he’d be somewhat prepared for it, since she’d been distant and especially busy since she’d returned from Salina for the summer.

As soon as the service ended, Violet hurried her mother to the buggy that was parked along the side of the church, but they weren’t fast enough, and Miles had was able to catch up to them.

“Violet!” he called.

She stopped. “Hello, Miles.”

Violet saw her mother give Miles a quick wave and head for the buggy.  “Mother needs to get home fast today.  Can we talk later?”

“Sunday dinner’s at the Armstrongs, Caleb and Julie invited me, so I suppose I’ll see you there,” he said.  “Violet, is there something wrong?”

Violet rubbed her forehead.  No, she couldn’t tell him in the church parking lot.  “I have some concerns that we need to talk about.  I’ll see you at dinner.  Maybe after we eat, you and I could take a walk.”

“You’re worrying me, Violet.  You’ve changed since you’ve come home for the summer, and you’ve been avoiding me.”  When she didn’t say anything, he turned and headed toward his buggy.  “See you later, then.”

As Miles rode home he felt a lump in his throat and an empty feeling in his gut.  He knew something was wrong.  Violet had been distant and avoiding him for the past two weeks.  He’d been so excited to have her back in town, but she always seemed to be busy or he learned he’d just missed her every time he’d called on her at home. 

What would he do if she broke their betrothal?  She’d been pushing the wedding date ahead since before her father died.  After her mourning period, her mother had given her permission to set a wedding date, yet she kept changing it and pushing it farther away, until he’d simply stopped asking.

Violet, with her strawberry blonde hair, and big blue eyes, was beautiful, soft-spoken, ladylike, and loved by everyone who met her.  He’d fallen hopelessly in love with her the first day he’d spotted her, when she’d walked into the bank with her father, walked up to his window, and stood beside her father while they’d finished the transaction. 

His friend, Quinn, had confided to him that her father was the minister of Grace Church, so Miles began going to church for the first time in his life, with the hope he might catch a glimpse of her.  One day he overheard her telling Quinn’s sister, Peggy that she was going to a barn dance that Friday.  He’d never been to one before, but he made sure to attend this one.  It was at the dance that they’d really become acquainted.  After that, he’d courted her steadily, and fell even more in love with her.  He was so smitten—no other woman in the world could interest him. He felt sick to his stomach now, wondering what Violet was going to tell him.  He also wondered how he should react if she did, indeed, break the betrothal.

On his way home, Miles saw Caleb and Julia pull down the lane to their house, and he turned and followed them. 

As they alighted their buggy, Miles called to them.   He jumped down from his buggy and hugged his sister.  Then he turned to Caleb.  “Can I talk to you for a minute?”

Julia gave him a puzzled look.

“It’s a man thing, Julia,” Miles said.

“Well, then, you two can sit on the porch while I go in and put a cooler dress on,” Julia said. 

When Caleb and Miles were settled in the chairs on the porch, Caleb asked, “What’s up?”

“It’s Violet.  I think she’s going to break off our betrothal today.  I don’t know what to do.  I can’t lose her, Caleb. I love her so much it hurts.” He patted his chest. 

Caleb sat deliberating Miles’s situation.  Violet and Caleb had always been close friends. He knew her almost better than her sisters knew her, which was probably why Miles always sought his advice.

“Are you sure?” Caleb asked.

“Well, she’s been avoiding me since she’s been home, and now she says we need to talk.  I just know—the look on her face, her body language—I just know it,” he said.

“If she does break it off, take it better than she would imagine, so it throws her off balance.  She’s probably expecting you to beg and plead, so don’t,” Caleb said.  “My advice is to act cool and not make a big fuss.”

“That’s easy for you to say,” Miles said. 

“Well, Miles, that’s what I’d do.  Women don’t like men who grovel.  Take it like a man and she’ll respect you more for being strong.

Miles sighed.  “I’ll try.”

George Armstrong was Jonas and Caleb’s father, and Phoebe was his second wife. Every Sunday since Jonas and Ivy were married, Sunday dinner was at either the Armstrongs’ or the Jeffries’ house.  Even with Hiram Jeffries gone, Lavinia had continued the Sunday ritual. 

Miles barely tasted the roast chicken at the Armstrongs’ dinner.  He watched as Jonas and Ivy fussed over their daughters, and Caleb and his sister were sneaking loving looks.  Rose and Quinn hadn’t come this week because they were having dinner with the Iversons’. Violet sat beside her mother and seemed to just push her food around on her plate, making a pretense of eating.  This made Miles feel even less confident that the talk would be a pleasant one. 

After dinner, when the guests all moved to the sitting room for tea and coffee, Violet approached him and motioned to the back door.  He felt his whole insides twist painfully, but he still followed her out to the backyard.  She led him to a swing that was a wooden bench attached to ropes and hung from a huge oak tree. 

“I’ve always loved sitting in this swing when we came here to visit,” Violet said, as she took a seat on the swing.  She smiled at him as he slid in beside her, but it wasn’t the smile he’d fallen in love with, as her eyes didn’t sparkle, and her dimples barely showed.

He thought it best to remain quiet so she could begin the end, and get it over with, so he looked down at his hands in his lap and listened.

“Miles, as you know, my job in Salina keeps me away from Abilene for months at a time, and now there’s so much work to be done: grading, testing, correcting papers, planning lessons—I barely have time for traveling back and forth.”  She paused and looked at him, as if expecting him to answer, but he remained silent.

“I thought it might be best if I—that is, we—broke off the betrothal.”

He swung his head around to look at her.  She had no tears in her eyes, and showed no remorse on her face, which told him everything he needed to know.  “I understand,” he heard himself say, but inside he was crying.  Caleb’s advice kept him from letting her see how broken he truly felt.

“I felt it wasn’t fair to you to be left here, unable to have a dinner partner, or someone to snuggle, and me, miles away in the same situation.  It just isn’t working, Miles.”

“Miles?  Miles?” he heard her say, repeatedly, but all he could do was to just sit there, shaking his head.  He couldn't think of anything to say.  He tried to heed Caleb’s advice and pretend she hadn’t just stuck a knife into his heart. If she would just stop calling his name long enough for him to think.

“Miles, talk to me!” Violet said.  “I need to know how you feel about this.”

Miles cleared his throat.  “I agree.  It isn’t fair at all.  I had asked you to quit the job and be a full-time wife and mother, but you preferred to work.  So I accepted your decision. I even offered to quit my job and get another one in Salina, but you didn’t want me to do that, especially after my recent promotion.  If your job’s that important to you, then you should keep it, and I hope you and your school will live happily ever after.”

He stood, and prepared to walk away, but she sprang up from the swing and pulled on his arm.  “Not this way, Miles.  I don’t want to end it with hard feelings.  I do love you, but I just love teaching and my independence more.  I want to be more than a wife and mother.”

Miles needed to leave before he embarrassed himself by letting the tears that were building up behind his eyelids loose.   “I really have to go.  I wish you the best of luck, God bless, and everything.”  He walked to his buggy and said, “And sure, we’ll still be friends.”  He got into the buggy and drove away.  The tears could no longer be held in check, and they streamed freely down his face.

Violet sat back down on the swing after Miles had thundered off down the road.  It was over, yet Violet didn’t feel as relieved or happy as she thought she might. Instead, she felt somewhat sad, because she really had enjoyed Miles’s company.  They’d had some great times together.  Endings, for whatever reason, were never enjoyable. 

She wondered what she'd do, now that she’d gotten what she wanted. She had the rest of the summer to do absolutely nothing.  She wouldn’t even see Gavin McKenzie until the next semester started.  She prayed Miles would get over this quickly and move on.