The Battle Over Marriage: Gay Rights Activism Through the Media

The Battle over Marriage

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This proof should not be

quoted without comparison

to the final text.

The Battle over Marriage

Gay Rights Activism

through the Media

Leigh Moscowitz

University of Il inois Press

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Urbana, Chicago, and Springfield

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© 2013 by the Board of Trustees

of the University of Illinois

All rights reserved

Manufactured in the United States of America

1 2 3 4 5 c p 5 4 3 2 1

∞ This book is printed on acid-free paper.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Moscowitz, Leigh.

The battle over marriage : gay rights activism through the media /

Leigh Moscowitz.

pages cm

Includes bibliographical references and index.

isbn 978–0–252–03812–9 (hardcover : alk. paper) —

isbn 978–0–252–07960–3 (paperback : alk. paper) —

isbn 978–0–252–09538–2 (e-book)

1. Same-sex marriage—Press coverage—United States. 2. Gay rights—

Press coverage—United States. 3. Gays in mass media. I. Title.

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hq1034.u5m67 2013

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306.84'80973—dc23 2013015221

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For Amelia and Eli

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Contents

Acknowledgments ix

1. Gay Marriage in an Era of Media Visibility 1

2. Fighting the “Battle to Be Boring”:

Marriage as a Portal into the Mainstream 25

3. “The Marrying Kind”:

The Face of Gay Marriage in the News 53

4. Gay Marriage Goes Prime-Time:

Journalistic Norms Frame the Debate 77

5. Speaking Out: Representing Gay Perspectives

in News Discourse 99

6. Conclusion: The Trouble with Marriage 125

Appendix: Studying Gay Marriage in the Media 135

Notes 149

References 151

Index 159

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Acknowledgments

As with any large-scale research project, I am indebted to many individuals whose support, insights, and guidance made this book possible, from its in-ception to its completion. First and foremost, I am indebted to and inspired by my activist informants—the communications directors, public relations directors, and presidents and founders of many of the nation’s leading gay rights organizations. These are people who work long hours for their cause and their community and yet still gave their time to me. In their offices, in coffee shops, and in gay bars, they shared with me stories of their own coming out, what it was like to see their lives reflected in the media and popular culture, and how their views about marriage changed when they

began planning their own commitment ceremonies and weddings. Their

perspectives transformed this project and the ways in which I will approach my research in the future.

I am also incredibly appreciative of the careful and attentive work of the anonymous reviewers of this manuscript. The time and attention they devoted to reading, commenting on, and critiquing an earlier version of this book shaped my thinking about this project. Their insights proved invaluable as I continued to refine my arguments. This book would not have been possible without the guidance, feedback, and support of my editor, Danny Nasset, at the University of Illinois Press, and the work of the production team. I am also indebted to my father-in-law, Ray Moscowitz, who put his editorial expertise to work in meticulously fine-line editing each chapter across a period of months. I am grateful for his countless hours of unpaid labor, thoughtful questions, and the journalistic lens he provided my work.

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x

acknowledgments

I also want to thank my fantastic colleagues at the College of Charleston, who made it fun to come to work every day. They have created a truly enjoy-able and collegial place to work, full of positive energy and encouragement.

I am grateful for my department chairs, Brian McGee and Bethany Goodier, who wrote supportive letters and assisted in procuring funding for the project, and for the mentorship of Alison Piepmeier, who helped me navigate

through the world of academic publishing.

This book began nearly a decade ago at the Indiana University School of

Journalism, and I will forever be indebted to my “Dream Team” committee, Professors Elizabeth Armstrong, Betsi Grabe, Dave Weaver, and my chair,

Radhika Parameswaran. This group of mentors provided me with founda-

tional tools throughout my research training—the tools to think, to write, and to ask interesting questions. Most important, they instil ed in me a passion for academic work. Their own scholarship guided and inspired this project. They dedicated countless hours to advising, counseling, and meticulously editing drafts. I am endlessly grateful to Radhika, whose belief in the project—and in me as the one to do it—meant I could not waver. I am also indebted to the many other scholars whose work laid the foundation for this project, specifically the work of Edward Alwood, Larry Gross, and Suzanna Walters, to name a few.

I thank the Association for Education in Journalism and Mass Commu-

nication (AEJMC) for their continued support of this project, first for recognizing this work as the winner of the Nafziger-White-Salwen Dissertation Award and later as an AEJMC Scholars grant recipient. I knew I had hit the jackpot when Carolyn Kitch agreed to be my mentor for the AEJMC Scholars program; her insights and feedback on my proposal and on chapter drafts

helped me take this project to the next level. This work also received financial awards from Indiana University and the College of Charleston. These student and faculty research and development grants made it possible for me to travel and interview activists face-to-face and assisted in the purchasing of videotaped news programs from the Vanderbilt Television News Archive.

As fantastic as the journey is, the process of beginning a new life as an academic comes with a unique set of chal enges. In particular, writing a book, at various points in the process, feels self-indulgent, unrealistic, and entirely out of reach. It was the love of friends and family members from all across the country that sustained me. I am indebted to Mary-Tina Vrehas, whose

friendship and persistent optimism have been a bedrock of strength for me, and to Tamara Leech, whose balance of scholarship, activism, and parents

ing is inspirational. I am grateful for the encouragement of colleagues and n

friends—people like Andy Billings, April Bisner, Jeff Bennett, Erin Benson, l

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acknowledgments

xi

Janis Cakars, Melissa Cakars, Spring Duvall, Suz Enck, Lori Henson, Claire King, Mike Lee, David Parisi, Kristin Swenson, Brynnar Swenson, Darrel

Wanzer, Isaac West, the “sandwich” col eagues at Butler University, and many others.

I am indebted to my parents—my father, James Stickler, who through his

own model ultimately inspired me to be a teacher and an academic, and to my mother, Beverly Mehrlich, whose belief, strength, and tireless counseling provided me the emotional support to see it through. The support of my family members has been a constant—people like Rick Mehrlich, Christy

and Mike Conway, Erica and Chip Gray, and John and Stephanie Stickler.

Ray and Barbara Moscowitz provided endless support, encouragement, and,

as previously noted, editorial expertise.

Finally, there is nothing that makes you analyze your own relationship

like writing a book about marriage. And so I owe the greatest debt to my partner of the last twenty-plus years, David Moscowitz, a man who infuses everything in his life—his scholarship, his teaching, his children, even his beloved pets—with the sort of vitality and optimism that stirs you. He did all the little things to keep me going, whether it was taking the kids to the park, bringing me coffee, or staying up with me into the morning hours so I could finish a chapter.

David also gave me the children I thought I could never have, children

who continue to amaze me and frustrate me and delight me throughout this process. My children and this project literally grew together; Amelia (now nearly ten) was a year old when I began to study media coverage of same-sex marriage, and Elijah (now seven) was born soon after the first period of interviews. My project is marked by them, both literally and figuratively.

I remember Amelia scribbling on my coding sheets, helping me “fill them

out,” and Eli, scrunched a little too tightly inside my protruding stomach, kicking me incessantly as I interviewed informants. This book is ultimately for Amelia and Eli, in the hope that they will grow up in a culture where they can be who they choose to be and love whom they choose to love.

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The Battle over Marriage

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Uncorrected Advance Proof

1. Gay Marriage in an Era of Media Visibility

My marriage, it’s my center. It’s the core of who I am as a human

being. It’s the base that you turn back to.

—Carol Adair, who married her lesbian partner

of 25 years in San Francisco in February 2004

There are millions of Americans angry and disgusted by what they

see on TV—two brides, two grooms, but not a man and a woman.

This is the new civil war in America.

—Randy Thomasson, executive director

of the Campaign for California Families

For nearly a decade, longtime partners Davina Kotulski and Molly McKay

celebrated Valentine’s Day by dressing up in traditional wedding garb: Davina in a tux, Mol y in a white gown. They stood in line with hundreds of opposite-sex couples at San Francisco’s city hall to request a marriage license. Every year, they were denied one. As a committed lesbian couple and activists in the movement for marriage equality, Davina and Molly rehearsed their annual futile quest for a marriage license precisely so that they would be turned down in front of local television news crews and newspaper photographers.

With the goal of creating, as Davina put it, “a media stir,” they came year after year to protest their exclusion to the institution of marriage, to “render visible the discrimination we face on a daily basis.”

On February 16, 2004, Davina and Molly’s desire for a state-sanctioned

wedding was finally fulfilled. Capturing headlines around the globe, San Francisco mayor Gavin Newsom had begun issuing marriage licenses to

same-sex couples in defiance of California law. Approximately 1,400 gay and lesbian couples, many of whom had traveled hundreds of miles to wait in line overnight in the cold rain, met in San Francisco to be a part of the media-dubbed same-sex “marriage marathon.” Millions of Americans who tuned

in to national and local television news broadcasts witnessed something

they had not seen before, which for most was beyond their imagination: gay s

and lesbian couples getting married “legally”—at least what was considered nl

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