The Leaving of Liverpool (33 page)

‘’Ere’s the welcomin’ party, Jake, me boyo!’ Vinny shouted.

‘Shut up, Vinny Malone, everyone’s looking at you!’ she snapped.

‘Dat’s not very welcomin’, like, is it?’ Franny peered at her closely. ‘Yez’ll do no good with ’er, Jake, she’s gorra cob on!’

Jake had managed to free himself from his brothers. ‘You look nice, Phoebe-Ann,’ he said affably, despite the fact that for most of the journey home his brothers had mocked and derided him about his wife’s airs and graces.

‘Don’t you touch me! You’re drunk – all of you!’

‘Oh, aye, that’s a great welcome that, I must say!’ Peader put in.

‘You mind your own business!’ She took Jake’s arm. ‘We’re going home.’

‘Not before ’e’s seen me ma. I’ve got me instructions,’ Seamus interrupted.

Phoebe-Ann glared at him. So, she’d sent Seamus down here to bring him to see her first. No doubt to tell him a pack of lies about her going out with Alice and Ginny. ‘I said he’s coming home with me, now!’ A group of people had lingered to watch the argument. It offered a small diversion, but a policeman was also making his way across to them. ‘How dare you make a show of me like this, Jake Malone!’ she hissed, pulling at his arm. ‘You’re a disgrace! You’re disgusting, that’s what you are!’

He pulled away from her grip. ‘If yer goin’ to carry on like this I’m goin’ ter see me ma.’

The policeman was within earshot. ‘Jake, please?’

‘Leave him alone,’ Seamus interrupted.

‘You mind your own bloody business, Seamus Malone! Go on, clear off!’

‘I’m not havin’ you speak to me brother like that.’ Jake was also getting annoyed. Who did she think she was coming down here and showing him up in front of everyone – brothers and shipmates and their families?

‘Are you coming home?’ Phoebe-Ann was near to tears but she wouldn’t let them have the satisfaction of knowing that.

‘When I’ve seen me ma.’

‘Having trouble, miss?’

She looked up at the policeman and then at Jake. ‘No, officer, but I’d be glad if you could see me to the tram stop?’

‘Yer not goin’ off with a bloody scuffer!’ Jake yelled.

‘You go to hell, Jake Malone!’ she yelled back while the rest of his brothers tried to calm him down, for the constable had taken out his whistle and truncheon and they had no intention of spending the night in a cell with their heads cracked.

 

She thanked the constable and began to walk towards St George’s Hall. The tears fell freely now. She was angry, hurt, disillusioned and ashamed. God knows when he’ll get home and in what state she thought, but did she really care? The answer was unclear for, when he was drunk, she found Jake utterly repulsive.

‘Phoebe-Ann! Phoebe-Ann!’

She turned at the sound of her name being called and, dashing away her tears with the back of her hand, she saw someone waving to her from the other side of the road. It was Rhys. She didn’t know whether to be glad or sorry.

He crossed over. ‘Where are you going? It’s too late for you to be here alone.’

‘I’m going home.’

‘Where’s Jake?’ Even now he found it an effort to speak of Jake Malone.

‘I don’t want to talk about him!’

He understood. He’d seen young Franny Malone staggering along the corridor of the train with a bottle in his hand. He’d also heard him arguing with the guard until Peader had appeared and smoothed things over to prevent them being thrown off the train.

‘Where’s Edwin?’ she asked.

‘He managed to get off early and caught the earlier train.’ He fell into step with her. ‘How are things, then?’

‘Same as usual. How are things at . . . home?’

‘Albert’s getting more and more withdrawn. I wanted him to go back home, to live with my mam, but he won’t. Says he won’t leave . . .’ He stopped. He was going to say ‘Lily’ but he thought it would be tactless and she looked as though she had enough to bear. His heart went out to her. If only. If only . . . ‘No sign of our tram,’ he said.

She shrugged.

‘Oh, what the hell! Let’s get a taxi, it’s only money.’

Before she could protest, he had hailed a passing cab which drew into the kerb alongside them.

‘Where to, la?’

Rhys opened the door for her. ‘Florist Street, then Lonsdale Street.’

The driver nodded. The Southampton train was in.

From the other side of the wide street, at the doorway of the ‘Royal’, Seamus Malone shook his brother. ‘Oh, that’s nice, isn’t it? There’s yer wife gettin’ in a taxi with some feller!’

Jake peered in the direction of his brother’s stabbing finger. All he saw was the back of a man climbing into a cab. ‘I can’t see her, yer bleedin’ liar!’

‘Well, I saw ’er!’

Peader shoved the pair of them inside. ‘Shurrup! Yer wastin’ good drinkin’ time!’

 

Phoebe-Ann was silent as they drove through the dark streets and Rhys felt so sorry for her.

‘Do you get out much?’

‘I go to work and sometimes I go to the pictures with Alice, and our Emily comes round when she can, but that’s supposed to be a secret.’

‘I know.’

‘Do you?’

‘Of course, but the others don’t.’

‘I saw them a couple of times and they cut me dead.’

‘They were very bitter Phoebe-Ann but I think they both regret it.’

‘Did they say so?’ For the first time that evening she felt hopeful.

‘Not in so many words but Emily said they ask if she’s heard anything about you. If you’re all right, if he’s treating you well.’ He felt awkward and yet annoyed. Quite obviously she was upset and he’d seen the rowdy group in the pub doorway. He felt he could have throttled Jake Malone. ‘That’s when she told me she goes to see you.’

‘But she hasn’t told the rest of the family?’

‘No, but give them time. If they are still interested in your welfare they’ll come round, stands to reason doesn’t it?’

She managed a smile, wishing she could tell him how much she longed to be able to visit them, to air her grievances, to share her hopes, to be part of a caring family once more. She missed them all. She admitted she was lonely and at that moment, after Jake’s desertion, she just wanted to go back to Lonsdale Street to be comforted and supported. Instead she said, ‘It was good of you to see me home, Rhys, and in style,’ she added, thinking of her only two other taxi rides. One on the night of the riots with Olivia Mercer and the other with Jake on that fateful night at the Rialto.

When they reached Florist Street and the cab stopped he got out and helped her out.

‘Thanks, Rhys. It was very good of you. You might have known that I didn’t want to come back on my own.’ She was too miserable to try to pretend that everything was fine. ‘I really do appreciate it.’

‘I know. I told you once that if you ever needed . . . help . . .’ He left the rest unsaid.

She nodded and gave him a sad little smile, then she turned and walked the few yards to her front door.

 

He hadn’t come home that night and she’d been glad of the fact. She’d slept fitfully and gone to work tired, her eyes dark-ringed. When she got home she found him sitting at the kitchen table, a half-empty bottle of rum beside him. Her heart plummeted.

‘I see you’ve come home then.’

‘It’s my house, isn’t it?’

She ignored him and took off her coat and hung it on the peg behind the door. ‘I’ll get you a meal, it may help to sober you up.’ She muttered the last words under her breath.

‘I heard that an’ if I want to drink in me own house I will!’

Oh, Lord! He was going to be difficult and she didn’t know how to handle him. ‘What did your ma have to say?’ She hoped her tone was light.

‘I don’t remember much.’

‘Maybe it’s just as well then.’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

She was losing her patience. ‘Anything you want it to mean! I suppose she told you she’d seen me with Alice and Ginny? Well, just like I told her, I’d been buying a new outfit and I was going to the pictures with my friends. You can’t expect me to stay in every night of the week while you’re away.’

Now he remembered just what his ma had said and all the taunts and innuendoes concerning Phoebe-Ann that his brothers had made on every voyage since he’d been married. At first he’d ignored them, telling them they were just jealous and they didn’t know what they were missing by not having a wife and a nice home. Lately he’d often pondered their words and their meanings, especially as she was so dull and miserable lately and now she seemed to be turning into a nag. His patience was getting thin. All she seemed to do was moan and complain and spend his money. ‘Yes, I bloody well do expect you to stay in. You’re a married woman an’ I’m not slavin’ away, pullin’ me tripe out in that bleedin’ stokehold so you can tart yourself up and go wastin’ me money!’

‘I used my own money! I didn’t spend a penny of yours!’

‘And that’s another thing! You can give that job up. I can provide for you . . . I’m not havin’ everyone sayin’ I can’t and that you have to go out to work. Yer makin’ me look a bloody eejit who can’t support a wife!’

Phoebe-Ann had a vision of what kind of a life his words portrayed and all the anger, frustration and disillusionment broke loose. She slammed the pan down on the table. ‘I’ll go out to work if I want to! I’m not staying in this house day in and day out by myself! I’ll go mad if I do. I want to be with other people, not sitting here staring at the walls or waiting until you fall in!’

He got to his feet. ‘Now you listen to me, girl! I’ve given you all the things you wanted, an’ I’m not havin’ it thrown back in me face. Me ma warned me and she’s right. Bleedin’ me dry like a leech and then showin’ me up in front of everyone. An’ our Seamus saw you gettin’ in a taxi with some feller!’

‘It wasn’t just “some feller” and your bloody Seamus hates me and always has done! But she put him up to it. I’m not stupid, she’s wicked, that’s what she is, and you’re all too thick to see it!’

He uttered a roar like a lion and lashed out at her, catching her across the side of her head. With a scream she fell backwards into the fireside rocker. A red mist danced before Jake’s eyes as he remembered Seamus’s words and his ma’s. A cheap floosie, that’s what his ma had called her. ‘Runnin’ off with someone else on yer first night ’ome, too,’ Seamus had bawled at him when he’d tried to defend her. How was he to know what she was up to while he was away? Out with her friends at the pictures. Did he believe that, Seamus had jeered. He’d been a bloody fool and now the neighbourhood would be splitting their sides laughing to see Jake Malone being given the runaround by a bit of a girl.

He caught her by her hair and dragged her to her feet. He’d show her who was the boss in this house. She needed knocking into shape properly this time. A hiding to make sure she knew that. He hit her again and again, her head snapping backwards and forwards like that of a rag doll until at last he released her and she fell in a crumpled heap on the floor. He kicked her inert form. That would teach her she couldn’t make a monkey out of him. He should have done that long ago. She needed keeping in her place like his ma had said.

He picked up the bottle from the table, shrugged on his jacket and slammed out. Now he felt his pride had been restored and he’d go and tell his ma that he
was
the master in his own home.

 

Emily and Edwin had decided to go for a walk as it was a pleasant evening and they had little chance of being alone in the house.

‘How is Albert?’ Edwin asked as they turned the corner.

‘Much the same. My heart aches to see him sitting staring into space. He’s turning into an old man. It’s pitiful.’

‘Rhys was telling me he wants him to go and live with his mam, back in Wales.’

‘I know, but he won’t go. I’ve asked him. Rhys has begged him and so have Jack and Jimmy.’

‘It would solve a lot of problems if he were to go, Emily.’

‘I know. When those two finally have enough money, they’ll go.’

‘How soon do you think that will be?’

‘I don’t know. I think Jimmy would go now but Jack’s more cautious. Says he wants enough money behind him to last a while, in case they can’t find work.’

‘If Albert went to live with Megan, what would you do?’

‘I don’t know.’

He put his arm around her and drew her towards him.

She reached out and touched his cheek gently. ‘I know we don’t get much time to ourselves. You’re very patient, any other man would get annoyed.’

He drew her closer, heedless of the fact that there was quite a bit of activity still going on in the street.

She didn’t draw away from him and the fact surprised her. Usually she was very self-conscious about public shows of affection.

‘Oh, Em. I’m a bit tired of being patient.’ He cupped her chin in his hand and tilted her face upwards and then gently kissed her.

Again, she made no attempt to draw back and yet again she was surprised at herself. The feeling of panic was absent. She felt a slight fluttering of the old fear but, as he continued to kiss her, it faded and was replaced by a deep tenderness. A feeling of belonging and . . . freedom! His lips were banishing the terrible dark memories and she relaxed. Her body felt feather-light and she could have continued to float, wrapped in this wonderful cloud of love and relief. A blessed warmth crept over her.

It was he who drew away first. ‘We could get married, Em. If Albert went to live with Megan, we could get a place near Southampton.’

She sighed deeply. Now she wanted to be with him, to love him, to tell him about the new warmth she felt, but his words had forced the practicalities into her mind.

‘It’s a big step, and what if they decide to bring the
Maury
back to Liverpool?’

‘There’s not much chance of that.’

She was her old, practical self again. ‘What will happen when they convert her to oil?’