The Man with the Golden Typewriter (27 page)

I have just finished
Goldfinger,
& have found that it stuck to me like a limpet, or limpet-mine. I think it well up to your best Bond level, full of ingenious invention, & fantasy, & interesting or curious or unfamiliar detail. You certainly needn't have warned me about the golf. I found the tension of the game tremendous. In fact, I believe you could create extreme anxiety out of a cake-judging competition at a Women's Institute – one of the cakes would probably be a product of nuclear fission, or of bacterial warfare at least.

I was quite sorry to see the last – and what an exit! – of Oddjob: one had got so used to having him around. I particularly liked the conversation with the gangsters – and
of
the gangsters – at the conference table. Pussy is a real wit – I should like to read a whole book about her.

I don't much like the circular saw business. I think it too like a caricature of your previous torture-scenes. It doesn't (for me) create alarm or suspense – it is too wildly unreal. Surely a circular saw makes far too much noise for any simultaneous talk to be heard? And anatomically I am a little worried. Whizz goes a fly-button – but didn't other objects get in the way first, or does Bond have undescended testicles?

Couldn't you dispense with this sort of torture-scene here, and make use instead of the zillionaire's
hypnotic
powers? Couldn't he use them on Bond and silly Tilly, in order to get a hold over them, & get then aboard the westward-bound aircraft? Yes?

I don't feel that the circular saw produces any frisson in the reader – merely a guffaw. Am I wrong?

Also, p. 111, Colonel Smithers is a fearful bore. Do we need him at all? And if so, could we have his lecturette shortened or omitted? It is terribly unreal to me. Bond had surely only to consult an encyclopedia if he wanted to know about gold. I should be inclined to cut the visit to the Bank altogether.

I enclose a list of notes & queries. I expect Daniel will be sending you more, when he has read the story.

I have corrected your spelling of cabochon, carrosserie, bagagiste, & Alsatian.

Is there any particular reason for writing “Mister” out in full instead of “Mr”?

And what happened to the Claddagh ring? I did hope it would turn up again. I expect Goldfinger melted it down & sent it off to India . . .

Now I fear this letter will look like a picking of holes, or attempted picking of holes, in the stout & brilliant fabric you have woven. Not at all, of course. I only wish it to be as well armoured as possible against the digs of envious reviewers & readers. Speaking for myself, I must say I have enjoyed the proceedings immensely – more, in some ways, than ever before. And, as you know, I send you every possible wish for the utmost success.

I shall look out for the Home Service on 10 July,
⁵
& shall hope to see Q. of S. in the
Sunday Times
,
⁶
& to see you when you come back, with gold on your fingers, from N.Y.

TO MISS JENNIFER ARMOUR, Messrs. Jonathan Cape, Ltd., 30 Bedford Square, W.C.1.

Jennifer Armour, Cape's marketing director, wrote enclosing the proofs of advertisements due to appear in
The Bookseller,
and also requesting Fleming's signature in a copy of
Goldfinger
. It was a present for her
brother, who was shortly to turn twenty-one ‘and whose literary education (and consequent behaviour) has been almost entirely confined and influenced by James Bond'. She explained that he had been expelled from both school and the Navy and was ‘a generally Bad Lot, all on account of
Bond
'
.

11th March, 1959

This seems to be a pretty poor 21st Birthday present for what sounds like an expensive young man, but anyway here is the autographed copy. Tell him that both Winston Churchill and I were black sheep once and that, as long as he doesn't make it a habit, it isn't a bad way of life up to around the age of 21, which is approximately when my own shade of black dwindled to its present elephant's breath grey.

Many thanks for the pulls of the advertisements. The long one is very saucy indeed and perhaps you noticed that the News Chronicle also commented on it.

TO BERNARD DARWIN, ESQ., Dormy House Club, Rye, Sussex

In one of his finer authorial moments Fleming managed to dedicate three whole chapters to a game of golf without once losing the reader's interest. The match, between Bond and Goldfinger, ended in the latter's defeat despite his having cheated. However, as many golfers pointed out, Goldfinger had theoretically won. It concerned a matter of balls.

8th April, 1959

Thank you very much for your kindly letter and I will now confess that a lot of my cronies at the Royal St. Marks, such as Beck and Hill, say they would have given the match to Goldfinger because he ended the match with the ball he had started with. It is clearly a matter for the Rules of Golf committee and the matter must, of course, be raised officially with Gerald Micklem.

TO THE HON. ANTHONY BERRY

Fleming's friend Anthony Berry (son of his employer, Lord Kemsley) wrote to say that the journalist Jack Jones would mention
Goldfinger
in the
Western Mail
– for which service he, Berry, expected to be rewarded in gold bullion. He had, however, one small criticism concerning wine: ‘But should not Goldfinger have known that Piesporter Goldtropfchen is a Moselle and not a Hock?'

8th April, 1959

I shuddered when I got your note and hastily reached for the book. Within an hour I was talking to Ian Gilmour
⁷
and he also made the point.

It is maddening and I have hastily put in a correction for the next edition they are printing. I had asked my invaluable secretary, Una Trueblood, to check on one or two facts in the manuscript and, in particular, to ring up my wine merchant and ask him for the name of the finest hock he had. When he produced this one I put it in without question. Obviously I must change my wine merchant.

I hope Jack Jones will give it the works in his series and, when he does, an old gold filling from one of my teeth will reach you in return.

When can I come down and visit you both to discuss Kemsley Newspapers and canasta?

TO LEONARD RUSSELL, ESQ., 14 Albion Street, Hyde Park, London, W.2.

Leonard Russell was Literary Editor of the
Sunday Times
, as well as being a friend of Fleming and a fellow golfer.

9th April, 1959

It really is shameful that you haven't yet finished “Goldfinger”. I suppose you're lounging around on a tiger-skin sofa eating a big box of chocs and reading Diana Cooper!

I'm very proud of your performance on the golf course since my lesson. The Royal St. Georges is blushing with pleasure at their newly acquired fame. But there is talk that, in fact, Goldfinger won the match because he began and ended the 18th hole with the same ball and I am being strongly urged to submit the whole matter to the Rules of Golf committee. This I am doing today.

You are missing nothing here and if I was you I should stick to the chocs and the tiger skin.

Love to Dilys and see you both soon I hope.

TO MISS R. N. RENDLE, 48 Hammond Road, Fareham, Hampshire

27th April, 1959

How very kind of you to have written and I am delighted that you are such a firm fan of James Bond. Some of his critics don't like him because he enjoys himself too much!

I suppose one day James Bond will come to a sticky end but, at the present moment, he is in excellent health and quite able to look after himself. I know he will be encouraged to stay alive in view of your interest in him!

I enclose a dreadful photograph of myself which you have my permission to put on the fire.

TO JACK JONES, ESQ., The Western Mail, Cardiff

29th April, 1959

I have been away for ten days, but I must write immediately to thank you sincerely for the extremely kind things you wrote about “Goldfinger” in the
Western Mail
. It was wonderfully encouraging appreciation by somebody who would not normally stoop to my kind of book, and I am most grateful.

I quite see your point that the book should have ended before the last two chapters but I'm afraid I had no further plans for Mr. Goldfinger
and I am a devotee of the corny ending where the villain dies and the hero gets his girl – though in this case it wasn't really more than half a girl! But, in the end, I was sorry to see Goldfinger go. He was a so much nicer man than James Bond!

Again with my warmest thanks for your most kindly critique.

TO THE HON. ANTHONY BERRY

29th April, 1959

I must say you and Mr. Jack Jones did me proud and I have written today to thank him.

Thank you, too, for wasting so much space on me. Unfortunately I have looked in vain for the gold filling and I can't trace it. I fear it must have been melted down to make my wedding ring for Anne.

However, I'm sure you will agree that gratitude is worth far more than gold bullion, so here it comes.

TO SIR FREDERICK HOYER MILLAR, G.C.M.G., C.V.O., Permanent Under Secretary, The Foreign Office, Downing Street, S.W.1.

Anticipating problems with prospective film or television deals, Fleming had written to the Foreign Office requesting assurance that his books did not breach security guidelines: ‘My books are fantastic and, having had experience in these things, I have taken pains to see that they would not give offence to my old friends in the Intelligence world. I also know from senior members of that world that, far from causing offence, the adventures are followed with affectionate interest tinged with hilarity by members of “The Firm”.' On receiving clearance he gave fulsome thanks.

3rd June, 1959

Forgive me for not having written before, but I only got back from abroad yesterday.

First of all, thank you very much indeed for your swift and kindly response to my rather bizarre request, but I am horrified to hear that you are one of my “ardent readers”. I shall have to put up my sights a bit higher in future!

I think your suggested formula is very reasonable and goes as far as could be expected. It should be perfectly adequate for the film and television people and of course you can take it for obvious reasons – not least of which is that I am still a member of the special branch of the R.N.V.S.R . [Royal Navy Volunteer Supplementary Reserve] – that I shall keep a sharp eye on any film or television production which may eventuate.

It would be very kind if you could send me a formal note on the lines you suggest.

When next we meet I will invite you to seal this pact in James Bond's latest stimulant. This, on the lines of pink gin, is pink Steinhager – a tough Austrian schnapps that definitely quickens the trigger finger!

TO J. H. DOVE, ESQ., 12 Selborne Terrace, Heaton, Bradford 9

4th June, 1959

Thank you very much for your letter of May 12th and, in theory, I entirely agree with you.

In fact, I tried hard to cut out these “he saids” and “she saids”, leaving in only those which are necessary for sense and continuity.

A matter of taste comes in here and I do not like dialogue to be as curt and bald as it often is in modern writing and I prefer “he said” to “Bond said” unless it is necessary to indicate the identity of the speaker.

However, as I write my next book, my knuckles will smart from your cane and I will see if I can do better.

TO STANLEY BOWLER, ESQ., F.R.P.S., F.R.S.A., 37 Burton Road, London, S.W.9.

While replying to Mr Bowler on a matter of photography, Fleming's mention of Norman Lewis may well have stemmed from the fact that he
had recently asked him to report on Cuba where, despite official reports to the contrary, he was certain trouble was brewing.

4th June, 1959

Very many thanks for your extremely perceptive and interesting letter of May 17th.

Of course you are quite right and I will confess that, although I discussed the matter at some length with my friend who is a distinguished practitioner of your craft, Mr. Norman Lewis, the result was very much of a fudge about which I had many qualms.

Now that you mention your alternative, it is a maddeningly obvious solution to the problem and one of which I had sufficient knowledge to make use after consulting with an expert such as yourself.

Should I have cause to dabble again in photography, I shall certainly take advantage of your kind invitation to consult you.

In conclusion, I am most grateful for your valuable letter and I apologise for insulting the intelligence of yourself and countless other experts in your field.

TO DR G. R. C. D. GIBSON, 1 The Green, Anstey, Leicester

Dr Gibson, one of Fleming's most diligent motoring correspondents, was delighted to see that Bond had graduated to an Aston Martin and enclosed a card for the Aston Martin Owners Club: ‘I'm sure he would enjoy being a member of the A.M.O.C. although I'm not so sure that we would feel comfortable at having him around!' He had much enjoyed
Goldfinger
but ‘although not a psycho-pathologist, I think it is slightly naughty of you to change a criminal Lesbian into a clinging honey-bun (to be bottled by Bond) in the last chapter.' Incidentally, why didn't Fleming try an adventure about Formula 1 racing? ‘Nobody has yet written a good novel on the subject.'

23rd June, 1959

Thank you very much for your splendid letter of June 17th and for your kind invitation for James Bond to join the A.M.O.C.

Since neither Bond nor his biographer are owners of an Aston Martin, I can do no more than pass your invitation on to the head of Admin. at the Secret Service from whose transport pool the DB III was drawn.

Incidentally, I don't agree that the car should be described as the “Mark III”. That reads a bit too stuffily!

I also disagree with your penultimate paragraph, couched though it is in such graphic language. Pussy only needed the right man to come along and perform the laying on of hands in order to cure her psycho-pathological malady.