The Skeptics Annotated Bible (840 page)

(1.49)
“Nathanael … saith … Rabbi, thou art the Son of God.”

50
Jesus
answered and
said
unto him
, Because I said unto thee, I saw thee under the fig tree, believest thou? thou shalt see greater things than these.

(1.50)
“Jesus … said … Because I said unto thee, I saw thee under the fig tree, believest thou? thou shalt see greater things than these.”

51 And he saith unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Hereafter
ye shall see heaven open, and the angels of God ascending and descending upon the Son of man.

(1.51)
“Ye shall see heaven open, and the angels of God ascending and descending upon the Son of man.”
Jesus falsely prophesied that Nathaniel would see heaven open and angels descend upon Jesus. Nathaniel never saw it; neither has anyone else.

2
And
the third day there was a marriage in Cana
of Galilee; and the mother of Jesus was there:

2
And
both
Jesus was called
, and his disciples,
to the marriage.

(2.1-2)
“The third day there was a marriage in Cana … and … Jesus was called … to the marriage.”
415 What did Jesus do after his baptism?

(2.3-9) Jesus’ first miracle was to turn water into wine. (Good thing he didn’t he turn the water into blood like his dad did in Exodus 7.)
71 Is it OK to drink alcohol?

3 And
when they wanted wine, the mother of Jesus saith unto him, They have no wine.

(2.3)
“When they wanted wine, the mother of Jesus saith unto him, They have no wine.”

4
Jesus saith unto her, Woman, what have I to do with thee?
mine hour is not yet come.

(2.4)
“Jesus saith unto her, Woman, what have I to do with thee?
” And his most blessed mother said unto him, “I’m your fucking mother, you jerk.” (Or words to that effect.)

5
His mother saith unto the servants, Whatsoever he saith unto you, do it.

(2.5)
“His mother saith unto the servants, Whatsoever he saith unto you, do it.”

6 And there were set there six waterpots of stone, after the manner of the purifying of the Jews, containing two or three firkins apiece.

7
Jesus saith unto them, Fill the waterpots with water. And they filled them up to the brim.

(2.7)
“Jesus saith unto them, Fill the waterpots with water. And they filled them up to the brim.”

8 And he saith unto them, Draw out now, and bear unto the governor of the feast. And they bare it.

9 When the ruler of the feast had tasted
the water
that
was made wine
, and knew not whence it was: (but the servants which drew the water knew;) the governor of the feast called the bridegroom,

(2.9)
“The water … was made wine.”

10 And saith unto him, Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine; and when men have well drunk, then that which is worse: but thou hast kept the good wine until now.

(2.11-15)
373 When did Jesus’ temple tantrum occur?

11
This beginning of miracles did Jesus in Cana
of Galilee, and manifested forth his glory; and his disciples believed on him.

(2.11)
“This beginning of miracles did Jesus in Cana.”

12
After this he went down to Capernaum
, he, and his mother, and his brethren, and his disciples: and they continued there not many days.

(2.12)
“After this he went down to Capernaum.”

13 And the Jews’
passover was at hand, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem
,

(2.13)
“Passover was at hand, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem.”

14
And found in the temple those that sold oxen and sheep and doves, and the changers of money
sitting:

(2.14)
“And found in the temple those that sold oxen and sheep and doves, and the changers of money.”

15 And
when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple,
and the sheep, and the oxen;
and poured out the changers’ money, and overthrew the tables
;

(2.15)
“When he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple … and poured out the changers’ money, and overthrew the tables.”

16 And said unto them that sold doves, Take these things hence; make not my Father’s house an house of merchandise.

17 And his disciples remembered that it was written, The zeal of thine house hath eaten me up.

18 Then answered the Jews and said unto him, What sign shewest thou unto us, seeing that thou doest these things?

19 Jesus answered and said unto them,
Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up.

20 Then said the Jews, Forty and six years was this temple in building, and wilt thou rear it up in three days?

21 But
he spake of the temple of his body.

(2.19-21) “Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up … He spake of the temple of his body.”
437 Who raised Jesus from the dead?
384 Did Jesus say, “Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up”?