Three Words: A Novella Collection (35 page)

I remember the
last time I ate was at breakfast. Suddenly, I’m ravenous.

“
I look like crap,” I say. “Not like someone you’d want to be
seen with in a public place.” My face goes blotchy and red when
I’ve been crying. My eyes swell up like balloons so I look like one
of those puffy-eyed fish. Not the ones with spikes that are
poisonous, those ones you find in a fish tank. Goggle-eyed. That’s
my usual I’ve-had-a-cry appearance.

“
I don’t care.”

“
The politically correct answer in this instance would be ‘you
look great’,” I say.

“
Yeah, but we clarified that you don’t and I can’t lie. Not
even to make you happy. Especially not when you know I’d be lying.
Anyway, the swelling will go down soon, won’t it? You won’t look
like
that
forever.” He makes a face.

“
Are you attempting to flirt with me, Nicholas? ‘Cause you’re
not doing a very good job.” I smile, but only a little.

“
Damn.”

“
Do you always pick up stray girls on the beach?”

“
Not unless they want me to.”

“
I’m guessing a lot of them would want you to.” The man’s an
Adonis. His eyes are nothing short of orgasmic. And the smile.
Swooooon
. Chastising myself for being so easily led, yet
again, I concentrate on the conversation.

“
It probably makes me sound like a wanker but most chicks
aren’t interested in the
real
me. They only want one thing.”
The smile grows, and suddenly I feel insanely attracted to him.
It’s like a magnet making my insides flutter and flip flop. I
straighten involuntarily. I press my lips together, supressing the
giggle that wants to escape from heaven knows where because I’m not
a giggler. Honestly, I’m not.

“
Your three bazillion dollars?” I tease.

He frowns.
“No. My body.”

“
God knows why any girl would want that. You’re not that
bae.”

He gives me a
blank look and I realise I’ve just made myself sound like the
student I am. “Bae, you know, like ‘hot’.”

I don’t know
why I even said it. It’s a word Emily likes to use; it’s never been
my thing. Maybe I’m trying to impress him.

“
At least I don’t have snot up my arm,” he retorts. He pauses.
“So, will you join me for a bite?”

Nicholas
stands, holding out his hand. I take it and he tugs me a little too
swiftly. I end up so close to his chest we’re almost touching. We
stand that way for a second or two and I can practically see the
electricity shooting between our bodies as I gaze up into his eyes.
He’s staring at me and they’re bottomless, limitless. Like the
furthest you could see into the inky blackness of space but never
see the end. They’re hypnotising.

“
Coming?”

I will be
shortly if he doesn’t stop looking at me like that.

“
Sure,” I say, my need to find out more about this man
squashing the trepidation of doing something so spontaneous. “I
think we’ve ascertained I’m not the best company at the moment but
if you’re willing to invite me knowing that, then I’ll come eat
with you.” I slide on my shoes. They feel gritty under the soles of
my feet even though I’ve tried to brush the sand away. I take my
towel and hat, shoving them in my beach bag, which I sling over my
shoulder. A weight has been lifted. Somehow, through a simple act
of kindness, this man has managed to lift me out of my
reverie.

“
You’re not going to cry again?”

“
Only if you buy me gin. That always makes me cry.”

*****

The Beach Hut
is quiet when we arrive. The summer’s almost over and most holiday
makers have gone back to their homes in the city. We find a table
in the corner with an outlook over the water.

Like I haven’t
seen enough of the water in the last few days. Every waking minute
has been spent sitting by the ocean. Thinking. Remembering.

A waitress
arrives and takes our order. She has white blonde dyed hair with a
blue streak down the side and a rather large toothy smile. Her
dress is so tight you can see every line of her underwear. The
buttons down the front look as if they might burst if she bends too
far and she leans in Nicholas’ direction, expanding her cleavage so
he can get a good look. Geez, her boobs are weapons of mass
destruction. She could smother entire suburbs with that
cleavage.

Nicholas makes
a joke about ordering gin but she doesn’t get it. I smile at his
attempt to cheer me up and order a glass of champagne. He raises a
quizzical eyebrow at me as the waitress walks away. “Bubbles?
That’s how you get over your melancholy? I hate to see what you’re
like when you’re on your game.”

“
I’ve decided to celebrate, not wallow. And I heard the
bubbles here are good, so I should at least sample a few glasses
before I leave, right? In fact, I might have a glass of everything
on the wine list.”

“
My kinda girl.”

“
Um, yeah.” I blush at that. I’m not usually anyone’s kind of
girl. I’ve always seen myself as not needing to be part of a
couple, single is fine with me. I could, of course, be convinced to
change that way of thinking. Especially by a guy with looks like
Nicholas. My boyfriends in the past have been, shall we say,
conservative? Nice but boring? Missionary? Not to mention countable
on one hand.

Nicholas is
none of those things it seems. He’s tall. I noticed that as soon as
he stood beside me on the beach. He towers over me and I’m not
exactly short. His shoulders fill out the dark blue t-shirt he’s
wearing and I can see ripples of muscle as he bends his arm. Not
those massive ugly muscles some boys at Uni like to cultivate but
the kind a girl wants to run her hands over. His eyes are a smoky,
bluish grey and framed by lashes that should be illegal on a man.
He has a head of scruffy, dirty blonde hair and stubble gracing a
manly chin. I find myself staring at it, imagining things I know I
shouldn’t but I can’t help it. It’s that invisible magnet thing. It
seems to be pulling us inexplicably together.

Yep, Nicholas
is hot with a capital H and a full stop between each letter for
emphasis. He’s a fantasy. The type of man you lust over but know
you can never have, the type that enters your dreams and leaves you
pulsing. To look at him is to throb with desire.

And I’m
sitting here calmly discussing the wine list.

Go, me.

“
So, Sadie.”

I jump,
distracted from my naughty thoughts. “Yes?”

“
What brings you to this neck of the woods?”

I want to
answer this truthfully but I fear it may reduce me to tears again.
“It’s the first anniversary of when my Mum died. She drowned.” I
indicate the spot along the beach where we met. “I’m staying here
for a week or so till Uni starts again.”

“
What are you studying?”

“
Horticulture and landscape architecture. I’m in my final
year.”

“
So you like science and you’re creative?”

Does that make
me a geek?

“
I guess. I like being in the garden. Creating an outdoor
space is more than putting up a pergola to me.”

“
Did your mum like gardening too?”

No, don’t go
there, Nicholas. Please don’t go there.

I swallow the
thought. “Yes.”

He gives a
slow nod. I think he knows I don’t want to discuss that topic any
more. Not yet.

“
And you? What’s your claim to fame? Why are you here?” I
ask.

“
First holiday in five years. If you could call it that. My
business partner arrives tomorrow so we’re going to mix a little
work and play before we head back to town in a week or
so.”

“
Where are you staying?” I imagine him in one of those
penthouses further along the coast to the south. Despite his rugged
looks, he seems like the type, like he only looks this way when
he’s on holiday. Not that there’s anything wrong with the way he
looks. Not at all.

“
I have a shack too. It used to belong to my grandparents but
now it’s mine. I’ve been coming here since I was a kid. Surfing
mostly. Can’t believe I’ve never run into you before
now.”

“
I’m a bit of a homebody, I guess. Haven’t been here since I
was about eight.” I could never understand why Mum didn’t come to
the bay more often. I know she loved the sea but that something
changed after the summer when I was eight. She was almost reclusive
after that. Naturally, she dragged me into that way of
thinking.

“
Bet you were a cute eight year old,” Nicholas
grins.

“
I was fat and had crooked teeth and freckles.”

“
I find that hard to believe.”

Cue excited
trembling of knees. Nicholas is definitely flirting now. Either
that or I’ve been sitting in the sun for too long and I’m imagining
things. Which could be on the cards. Once, I was convinced this guy
in my course was flirting with me across the Uni Bar and it turned
out he was gesturing to his girlfriend behind me. I completely
misread the smile and went swanning up to him to introduce myself.
When I got there, he looked straight through me like I was
invisible, which I sort of wished I had been when his entire social
group began snickering at me for being so dim.

I pull a podgy
face. “See.”

“
Not seeing it.” He’s doing it again. His eyes are twinkling
and he’s looking at my mouth; staring quite openly as if he wants
to eat me up. As if by some force of nature I find myself running
my tongue over my lips and tucking a hair behind my ear, tilting my
face to show him my best side. I’m flirting back. My mother is
hardly cold in the grave and I’m flirting with a guy I’ve met on
the beach. I lower my eyes, shove my hands between my knees under
the table and try to think of something else.

Geez, it’s
hard though.

*****

We sit at the
table well into the night. I don’t know where the hours go but by
the time it’s closing I feel as if Nicholas and I have known each
other forever. Our conversation is easy and he’s managed to make me
laugh without feeling guilty for having a good time, something
nobody else has been able to do. Most of my friends tiptoe around
me like I’m breakable; too scared I’ll crack or jump off a cliff.
Nicholas is not like that. His matter-of-factness and honesty are
refreshing.

Behind the
counter the waitress is drying a very large serving platter and
looking at the clock on the wall every thirty seconds. Each swipe
of her cloth is slow and purposeful as she turns back to stare us
down. She releases an exaggerated sigh and Nicholas raises his
eyebrows in my direction. “I think she’s giving us the hint,” he
says, tilting his head in the waitress’s direction.

I glance
around the restaurant. It’s empty. Some of the lights have been
turned off and the chairs are turned upside down on the tables. I
was so lost in conversation; I hadn’t even noticed we were the only
ones left. I feel a little deflated that our evening is about to
end. “I suppose we better make a move.”

“
Yep. That plate looks lethal. She might Frisbee it at our
heads if we don’t.”

I smother a
titter and move to pick up the bill from the table but Nicholas’
hand covers mine, stopping me. His skin is warm against my
knuckles. Smooth and not in keeping with the rugged exterior he
portrays.

“
Let me pay. Please,” I say. “It’s the least I can do after
making you endure my sad sack story all night.”

“
I enjoyed myself. Didn’t you?”

“
Well yes, but—”

“
I want to.” The look in his eyes says he thinks settling the
bill will send my debit card into rocketing the stratosphere of
debt.

“
I touched it first,” I joke, not wanting him to remove his
hand, hoping he’ll play along a while longer.

He rubs his
thumb over my knuckles. A tingle begins in my hand and shoots up my
arm before slippery-dipping into my belly. “Okay. You win. But next
time, it’s my treat.” Quickly, he tugs the cheque from beneath my
fingers and pockets it with a grin.

Damn. He
completely out-foxed me. He knew the effect his fingers would have
and he played me.

“
Who says there’s going to be a next time?” It’s my turn to
quirk an eyebrow.

He leans
close, staring right into my eyes. It’s unnerving and sexy and my
lungs forget how to breathe. I’m out of my depth in this game but
I’m not going to let him know.

“
Me,” he says. “What do you intend to do about it?”

Um.
Nothing?

“
I could ignore you.”

“
But you don’t want to. And I don’t want you to.”

He’s got me
pegged.

Nicholas
stands. He fishes the bill and a hundred dollar note from his
pocket and places them on the table. “So how about tomorrow
morning. I’ll see you on the jetty around seven. I’m taking the
Constance
for a spin.”

“
I—”

“
Don’t like water?”

“
No.”

“
Married?”

I tilt my head
at him. I’m way too young to be married.

“
Can’t swim?”

Oh, this is
ridiculous.

“
Thought so. No plausible excuse,” he chuckles. “See you
bright and early then. Don’t forget a hat and
sunscreen.”

And he’s
gone.