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Authors: Bathroom Readers’ Institute

Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Weird Inventions

BOOK: Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Weird Inventions
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Uncle John’s
BATHROOM
READER
®

BATHROOM READERS’ PRESS

ASHLAND, OREGON

“No amount of skillful invention can replace the essential element of imagination.”

—Edward Hopper

“ShamWow holds 20 times its weight in liquid!”

—Vince, the ShamWow guy

UNCLE JOHN’S BATHROOM READER®

WEIRD INVENTIONS

Copyright © 2013 by the Bathroom Readers’ Press (a division of Portable Press).
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.

“Bathroom Reader,” “Portable Press,” and “Bathroom Readers’ Institute” are registered trademarks of Baker & Taylor. All rights reserved.

For information, write: The Bathroom Readers’ Institute,
P.O. Box 1117, Ashland, OR 97520
www.bathroomreader.com

Cover and interior design by Andy Taray /
Ohioboy.com

eISBN: 978-1-60710-794-1

E-Book edition April 2013

THANK YOU!

The Bathroom Readers’ Institute sincerely thanks the people whose advice and assistance made this book possible.

Gordon Javna

Brian Boone

Andy Taray

Christy Taray

Trina Janssen

Claudia Bauer

Dan Mansfield

Jill Bellrose

Megan Todd

Brandon Hartley

Will Harris

Jack Feerick

Chris Holmes

Erica Richman

Jeff Giles

Jon Cummings

Dave Lifton

Donny Rodriguez

Anna Zajac

Adam Bolivar

Eleanor Pierce

Eric Dodson

David Hoye

Blake Mitchum

Jennifer Frederick

Sydney Stanley

Lilian Nordland

Aaron Guzman

CONTENTS

BREATH-TO-ENERGY CONVERSION MASK

INSTANT DRUNKENNESS-REVERSING PILLS

INSOMNIA HELMET

ARTIFICIAL CHEWING HEAD

ARTIFICIAL LEAVES

FLOATING SHADE

THE ELECTRIC HICCUP CURE

3-D PRINTABLE HAMBURGERS

TOILET SNORKEL

BREATH DETECTOR

ANTI-STICK SPRAY

CAR KITCHENETTE

AUTOMATIC HAT TIPPER

THE BOYFRIEND BODY PILLOW

ARAB AUTOMATA

THE HOLODECK

ANTI-CARJACKING FLAMETHROWER

PROGRAMMABLE TATTOOS

GERBIL SHIRT

THE FLEXI-PHONE

THE FAKE TV BURGLAR DETERRENT

DIMPLE DRILL

BRAINPUT

AUTOMOBILE URINAL

A BETTER SKIPPING STONE

4 WAYS TO STOP OVEREATING

SILENT-MOVIE SPEECH BALLOONS

THOUGHT SCREEN HELMET

ELECTRONIC CIGARETTES

HYPER-REALISTIC FACE MASKS

CASKET-VISION

BUTTER STICK TYPE

FART-ABSORBING UNDERWEAR

BANANA SUITCASE

BEER CAN ROBOT

BIONIC EXERSUIT

PHONE GAS

THE LAVAKAN

THE FAKE FARMER

BODY HAIR THINNER

BEACH BOOTS

INHALED CAFFEINE

EDIBLE FECES MEAT

SCARY CHILDBIRTH APPARATUS

ROCKING-KNIT CHAIRS

INFLATABLE BREAST IMPLANTS

WEIRD VIDEO GAME ACCESSORIES

THE BOXING BUBBLE HEAD

IMPLANTABLE CELL PHONE

ICE-CUBE PIGEON REPELLER

STUFF THAT CLEANS ITSELF

DIGITAL EAR CLEANER

THE ELECTRIC DOORMAT

PERSONALIZED ACTION FIGURE MACHINE

SOLAR-POWERED BIKINI

THE DISAPPEARING DRESS

HANDS-FREE SANDWICH HOLDER

EXTREMELY USEFUL KITCHEN GADGETS

DOG DNA TEST KIT

EARTHQUAKE HOUSE

CHEESE-FILTERED CIGARETTE

THE BABY MOP

HELMET BAR

THE LEVITATING TABLE

THE PERIODIC TABLE TABLE

WHERE’S MY HOVERBOARD?

DOG TRANSLATOR

EARLY GPS

AN EARLY ELECTRIC RAZOR

THE THUMB-SUCKING STOPPER

PORTABLE LADY URINAL

THE WRIST GUN

HYPOALLERGENIC CATS

THE ELECTRIC PICNIC

GOLF GADGETS

PILLS THAT MAKE YOUR POOP GOLD

MICK FLEETWOOD’S DRUM SUIT

DAN HARTMAN’S GUITAR SUIT

THE IGROW HAIR HELMET

SAFER RUSSIAN ROULETTE

INVISIBILITY CLOAK

KEG HEAD

CAT EARS FOR HUMANS

TEETH EXERCISER

SPRAY ON WI-FI

SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE GLASSES

THE WORLD’S WEIRDEST VENDING MACHINES

SPRAY-ON CONDOMS

THE KISSING SHIELD

TOAST WITH THE MOST

THONG DIAPER

FACE-TO-FAKE TANDEM BIKE

SQUATTY POTTY

THE WORLD’S LIGHTEST SYNTHETIC MATERIAL

GENETICALLY-MODIFIED SILK

THE LEVITATIONARIUM!

SILENT PARTIES

SELF-DRIVING CARS

THE MEDITATION BAG

HIGH-FIVE SIMULATOR

SHIRTS THAT ROCK

NO MORE MISSING SOCKS!

SQUARE WATERMELONS

SMOKER’S HAT

THE MAN BRA

OLESTRA

POTTY TRAINING FOR CATS

CAT WIGS

X-RAY SHOE FITTER

SPIRAL SHOES

HEAD-SHAPED PUMPKIN MOLD

WATERLESS DISHWASHER

THE SELF-CLEANING HOUSE

VIDEO GAMES, WITH SMELLS

CRIMINAL TRUTH EXTRACTOR

FLESH BRUSHING APPARATUS

STAMP MOISTENER

THE VAPORTINI

TV HAT

SMITTENS

POLAR BEAR HATES SNORING

WILD WEST MOUSE TRAP

FUTURISTIC JAPANESE TOILETS

PERSONAL FIRE ESCAPE

LICENSE PLATE FLIPPER

SAUNA PANTS

THE ICE CREAM CONE ZONE

FINGER MUSTACHE TATTOOS

SWISS ARMY RING

THE CIGARETTE RING

MANNEQUIN GUITAR

A WORKING MODEL OF THE EARTH

WAR KITE

NEW WOOD

THE PSYCHIC PLANT

THE EYEBORG

INVISIBLE BIKE HELMETS

GREENHOUSE HELMET

REMOTE-CONTROLLED HORSE

INFINITE SOAP

HUMAN SAIL

SADISTIC BABY GADGETS

LINCOLN TUNNEL CATWALK CARS

ONE INTENSIVE COMB-OVER

NEW FRONTIERS IN CAFFEINE DISPERSAL

DUMB USB GADGETS

CORDLESS JUMP ROPE

WINE-BOT

COLLAPSIBLE RIDING COMPANION

BUBBLE HAT

SPINNING WALL

CHOW, BELLA

CONTROL-ALT-DELETE HANDLE

EXHAUST-POWERED CAR JACK

INDOOR PET POTTY

THE I-ON-A-CO CURE-ALL BELT

A SAFER COCKFIGHT

THE PLASTIC WISHBONE

ACT NOW! SUPPLIES ARE LIMITED!

ANTI-GRAVITY FLYING SAUCER

FANCY MAN MUSTACHE ACCESSORIES

RELAXATION CAPSULE

DISSOLVABLE MOUTH BURN STRIPS

THE BIG HAIR HAT

SOUND PERFUME GLASSES

STYLUS ICONS

TAPEWORM TRAP

TALKING BASEBALL CARDS

VACUUM TRAIN

TOPLESS SANDALS

PIGEON-GUIDED MISSILES

IN-CAR RECORD PLAYER

ALUMINUM FACIAL SPA

THUNDERSHIRT

EXTREMELY INSTANT NOODLES

MIRACLE WEIGHT-LOSS PRODUCTS

SPRAY-ON SKIN

THE THEREMIN

MORE KITCHEN GADGETS

THE 10-IN-1 GARDEN TOOL

BAGELHEADS

GOOGLE GLASSES

THE SOVIET CALENDAR

THE TRANQUILITY CALENDAR

THINGS INVENTED BY THE PROFESSOR ON
GILLIGAN’S ISLAND

ICE-BASED AIRCRAFT CARRIER

HAMSTER SHREDDER

SHOTGUN WITH SHOT GLASS

PEDAL-LESS RUNNING BIKE

CUDDLEBOTS

SECURITY GERBIL

THE INTERROBANG

THE NUTRITION PATCH

SPEAKER VEST

GREEK FIRE

CHARLIE SHEEN’S CHAPSTICK DISPENSER

ANTI-GRAVITY BOOTS

THE FIRST FLYING CAR

STUD SPECTACLES

NEUTICLES

BED STRAIGHTENER

BOOK: Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Weird Inventions
2.2Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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