You, Me and Him (5 page)

CHAPTER FIVE

It was a rainy afternoon. The restaurant was quiet except for Finn who was sitting at one of the corner tables. He appeared at ease in his own company. I had been to the cinema only once on my own, when I was seventeen. Three people were in the auditorium, one of which was an old lady with wispy grey hair eating a banana from a mouldy brown paper bag. I’d looked around me uncomfortably and then fast-forwarded my life in a panicked second. Would that be me in years to come?

Back to Finn. He hadn’t shaved and he looked tired, as if sleep were his enemy. ‘We’re calling the club Mirror Ball,’ he said when I asked for his order.

‘That’s quite catchy.’ I was drumming a biro against my pad; he was tapping the menu against the table.

He raised an eyebrow. ‘Look at that. You and me are making sweet music together.’

I continued to stare at him, pen poised. Tiana had advised me to play it ice cool.

‘Sorry. I’ll have a pepperoni and cheese pizza and a black coffee, please.’ When I walked back to the bar I could have sworn he was watching me.

I gave the order to Mikey and then sat down at the bar, picked up a paper napkin and pulled free the pen that was holding my hair in a ponytail. I started to sketch a picture of two figures dancing. I gave the girl an exotic feather in her hair and fantastic legs, long and slim. I loosely drew an open-collared shirt for the man with one of his arms around the woman’s tiny waist; I arched her back seductively. I sketched a mirror ball above them.

‘Josie!’ Mikey called from the kitchen. Finn looked over at me. I heard plates smashing against the floor. ‘Momo’s going to take this off my wages,’ Mikey said with a frown as we both picked up the broken china. We heard the door open and shut and a group of students piling in. ‘You go.’ He winked. ‘Thanks for your help.’

Finn was standing at the bar. ‘Can I have another black coffee, two sugars? By the way, who did this?’ He was holding up the napkin.

‘I did.’

‘Quite the artist, aren’t you, waitress girl?’

Arrogant shit. I tried to retrieve it. He sat back down in his chair. ‘Give it to me!’ I snatched air. Finally I managed to grab his hand and attempted to pull the napkin free but he wouldn’t let go. He leant back and waved it in front of me. When I tried to reach it again he was too quick, swapping the napkin to the other hand and then back again. I gave up. He placed it inside the top of his jeans.

‘Cut it out, you two,’ Mikey ordered, walking past us. ‘Momo will be back in a minute. Finn, your pizza’s ready.’ He plonked it on the table.

Finn and I exchanged looks, bonded by being told off.

He sat with his hands behind his head and looked down at the napkin. ‘I promise you my hands will stay here. Come and get it.’

‘No, thanks, you can keep it.’ I turned away with a wide smile and walked back to the bar.

A couple of students walked in holding files and library books and sat down at the corner table. One of the girls blew onto her hands to warm them up. ‘Don’t look now,’ she whispered, followed by a huge sigh because the other instantly turned to gaze at Finn. Frustrated and destined to invisibility, Mikey took their orders. I touched him on the shoulder. ‘You OK? It’s only a few broken plates.’

He nodded distractedly. ‘Josie?’

‘Mmm?’ I said, pouring coffee.

‘Do you fancy going for a drink after work?’

‘Sure,’ I said, still looking at Finn.

‘He’s an idiot, leave him to it.’

Finn walked up to the bar and sat down on one of the stools, leaning towards me. I slid the cup of coffee over to him and then bent down to find the sugar sachets.

‘Great view,’ I heard. I tried to pretend I wasn’t thrilled by the comment.

‘Are you going to buy that coffee, Finn, or are you just going to hang around Josie all afternoon?’ Mikey asked, slamming ice into Diet Cokes.

‘I think I’ll do both, particularly the latter.’

Mikey stomped off. ‘I didn’t know you could draw,’ Finn said with that smile that was about to happen.

I crossed my arms. ‘I was doodling. I know I’m no Picasso.’

He raised his hands defensively. ‘I’m sorry. Other people’s talent frightens me so much I turn into an immature monster.’

That wasn’t what I’d expected. He smiled properly. ‘Seriously, I really like it. That kind of image would make a great flier for the club. Would you … I mean, I don’t suppose you’d consider helping me design them?’

‘I’ll think about it.’ Tiana would be so proud.

‘How about this evening? We could meet and work on them?’

‘Tricky. Not sure I’m free.’

He shook the slim pink packet of sugar between his fingers and I watched him closely as he tore it open with his teeth and then poured it into the coffee.

Another group of students piled in and sat down. Finn followed me as I walked over to their table with my pad and pen. ‘What can I get you?’

‘Hot chocolate,’ said one.

‘Cappuccino.’

‘Make that two. Ooh, I might have the chocolate fudge cake too.’

They were gawping at Finn. ‘Come on, what do you say? Will you help?’ he persevered. ‘I’ll do anything in return.’

I raised an eyebrow. ‘
Anything?
’

‘Anything,’ he repeated, running a hand through his hair.

‘Are you mad?’ one of the girls exclaimed. ‘Take him up on it!’

‘Or if you don’t, I will,’ another said.

Then Dominique walked in. She was wearing skinny blue jeans which wrinkled under the knees because they were so tight, a pink mohair jumper and beige cowboy boots. ‘Finny!’

Finny?

‘I’ve been looking for you everywhere. Didn’t you get my message?’

He shook his head.

She tugged at his arm proprietorially. ‘What are you doing here?’ She eyed me suspiciously. ‘Come on, lectures start in a minute.’

There were disappointed sighs around the students’ table. The show was over.

Finn grabbed his leather jacket from the back of his chair. Then he was ripping a piece of paper out of one of his books.

‘What are you doing now?’ Dominique asked impatiently.

‘Hang on.’

She blew a large pink perfect bubble right in front of me. ‘I’ll be outside.’ She slammed the door.

A piece of paper was thrust into my hand. ‘
Meet me outside Kings, under the arch at seven. PLEASE
,’ I read.

*

Finn and I were sitting together in the college library. The air was static with concentrated energy. Before meeting Finn, I’d had to call Clarky. He’d mentioned buying some food to make a curry tonight. ‘Is it a date?’ he’d asked.

‘No, I’m just helping him design a flier for the club.’

‘Ah, that’s what he calls it. I’m going out with Sandra anyway.’

‘Oh.’ I’d been worried about letting him down and he was going out anyway. ‘I thought her name was Sandy?’

‘Sandy. Sandra. Much the same.’

‘Great, have a nice time.’

‘I will.’

As I was about to leave Mikey had asked me where I’d like to go for our drink. I had to make up a quick excuse that I’d forgotten it was my dancing class tonight.

We sat by the window. Finn wanted to be ‘someplace quiet’. I told him we had two options: we could try and find an image from a dance or film book which I could scan onto the computer; or I could draw him something. ‘Draw me exactly what you drew on that napkin,’ he insisted, moving closer. He was almost childlike in his enthusiasm, settling in to watch me as if waiting for his favourite movie to begin while he clutched a box of buttered popcorn.

As I drew, I could feel a tension between us, something I’d never felt before. Up until now I’d had lots of kisses but only one serious boyfriend, Jonathan. We went out during our ‘A’ levels. I can remember the floor was sticky with beer as we danced to George Michael’s ‘Careless Whisper’ and shared our first kiss. Jonathan had bouncy brown curls and an easy open smile, but he didn’t exactly make my pulse race. One night we had rented a movie and were sitting alone in the dark. He wanted to go ‘all the way’. I was more interested in unwrapping Quality Street. ‘Everyone else is getting past second and third base,’ he’d complained.

‘It’s not a rounders match,’ I replied, watching him reluctantly return his attention to Steve Martin and wondering what was wrong with me? Why didn’t I want to do it? ‘Perhaps you just don’t want to do it with
him
,’ Tiana had reassuringly explained.

‘Damn,’ I whispered. I’d given my lady too large a head so carefully had to rub out my mistake, blowing on the paper gently. Finn lowered his head too; our lips were only inches apart. ‘What have you done?’ Normally I wouldn’t have liked anyone sitting so close to me while I drew. ‘Her head’s too big,’ he commented. I could feel his breath on my cheek.

‘I know. Don’t back-seat draw.’

He laughed. ‘Have you been to New York?’

‘No. Why?’

‘Just wondered. I started going there in the holidays with my twin brother, that’s when I started to collect records.’

‘You have a twin?’

‘Ed. We’re nothing like each other.’

‘Is he good-looking?’ I started to laugh at my own joke.

‘Very. That’s the one and only thing we do have in common.’

Damn. Why did he have an answer for everything?

‘Actually that’s not quite true. We have good looks and music in common.’

‘You sound close.’

‘Yeah, we are. There’s no competition between us which is great. The last thing he’d want to be is a doctor and I’d never go into acting. I think he’s deluded. There’s no money in it.’

I laughed. ‘Unless you’re successful like Robert Redford, he’s my pin-up.’

‘You’ve got a nice laugh. Sexy, like you’ve got a sore throat. Is it natural or do you put it on?’

‘It’s natural, thank you. Now, how about that?’ Finn leant in much closer than he needed to, our arms touching. ‘She’s more in proportion now.’

‘That’s better,’ he agreed, but his eyes weren’t on the drawing.

‘Shh,’ said one of the readers.

‘Do you want to go somewhere else?’

‘Where?’ I looked out of the window. It was raining heavily.

‘My room? Don’t worry, it’s not far. Then we can make all the noise we want,’ he suggested with that raise of the eyebrow.

Finn gallantly held his file over my head as we ran across the gravelled path. Already I felt protected by his height. He must have been six foot three. It was rare that a man was taller than me. I followed him into an old dark building. Students’ names were painted on a wooden board at the foot of the stairs.

He opened the door. ‘Well, this is my space.’ He led me into a sitting room with pale walls and an old wooden floor. ‘Easier to do it here don’t you think?’ he suggested as he opened the door to his bedroom. He pointed to a desk under an arched window that was covered in books and papers. ‘My bedder hasn’t been in, sorry ’bout the mess.’ He started to stack books into piles. They formed two tall towers.

‘I could do this at home?’

‘No, no, better if we do it together.’

He pulled his jumper off in one swift go and then put on some Aretha Franklin. ‘I love old vinyl, there’s nothing better than that crackling sound just before the music starts. You know what I mean?’

I nodded.

‘Are you into music?’ He gently placed the needle on the vinyl.

I loved Madonna, Kylie and Fleetwood Mac. ‘Love it, all kinds,’ I added quickly.

I took out my drawing and started again. We talked. I learnt that he rowed every morning at 6.30 but was often late and got told off. He wasn’t sporty like Christo but liked to keep fit. He was restless if he didn’t take exercise. He lived off adrenalin and lack of sleep.

‘Or it could be all that coffee. Why do you drink so much?’

‘Because it’s bad for me. How about you, Josie? What do you love?’

‘Lots of things.’

‘Like?’

‘Art. Ever since I was a child, all I’ve wanted to do is paint. I wasn’t interested in toys. My father built me a tree house and I used to hang out there all the time, painting. It was my escape.’

‘From what?’

‘From the norm. I think we all need an escape. I created my own little private world. Everyone should do it, have a secret obsession.’

‘You’re right. My escape is music.’

‘Exactly.’

‘Where do your parents live?’

‘Dorset. It’s beautiful there.’

‘Isn’t it boring? I’ve always lived in London, find Cambridge way too quiet.’

‘I don’t find it boring.’

‘This is looking great,’ Finn said, referring to my picture. ‘You’re lucky to have such talent, to know what you want to do.’

‘But you do too, don’t you?’

‘Yes, I want to be a doctor, more than anything. I wish the academic work wasn’t so dry though. There’s so much stuff you have to cram into your brain, then when I don’t think any more can physically go in they give me another ten-foot-long reading list.’ He made a fist and tapped the side of his head, as if it were hollow. ‘Still, I’ve got to learn it.’

I watched him lighting a cigarette and noticed his hands were shaking. I wanted to put mine over them to try and calm him down. ‘You don’t mind, do you?’

‘No, go for it.’

‘I smoke like Pat Butcher. Want one?’

I shook my head. ‘Just don’t wear the earrings, OK?’

There was that flash of a smile. ‘What bad habits do you have, Josie?’

‘Going back to strangers’ rooms?’

‘I’m not a stranger.’ He was standing behind me now. Flustered, I stood up and turned to him with the drawing, bringing us back to more comfortable ground.

‘I like it.’ He took the piece of paper out of my hand. ‘Have you thought about what you’d like in return?’

There was a loud knock on the door and it immediately swung open. It was Christo. I couldn’t decide whether I was relieved or disappointed. Finn and me, it was going too fast, in a direction I hadn’t prepared myself for yet. ‘All right, mate. Oh, hi …’ Christo had forgotten my name.

‘Josie,’ Finn said, his voice back to normal. ‘Look, she’s going to draw our fliers for the club.’

‘Wicked! Wow, thanks, Josie.’ He looked sheepish. ‘Sorry ’bout the other day. I was rude.’

‘That’s OK. All we need to do is find a cheap printer and get however many copies you need,’ I said. ‘Right, I’d better go.’