Read Your Heart's Desire Online

Authors: Melody Carlson

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BOOK: Your Heart's Desire
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As she changed back into her dungarees and work shirt, she felt like she had made the right decision coming here. Joseph—make that
Joe
—seemed happy. He seemed like he was already making a good adjustment. He'd made a friend and was eager about school. Now if only she could find a job…a way to keep him here.

To distract herself from fretting over her employment prospects, she rolled up her sleeves and went to work unpacking the rest of her boxes, putting things in place, and even using the leftover yellow paint to paint the few small walls of the kitchen. The black cat clock would look much sharper against the lemon-yellow paint color. Seeing that it was nearly two, she figured it was a good time to stop. Rich would probably be back with the boys soon.

She was just in the side yard, cleaning the yellow paint out of the paintbrush, when Marjorie came around the corner. “There you are, Sis.”

“Hi, Marjorie.” Caroline stood up straight, smiling at her sister. She looked sweet in a blue-and-white-striped dress. “You look as fresh as a daisy!”

“And you look like a mess.”

“Thanks.”

“Sorry.” Marjorie patted her midsection. “I just wanted to wear this dress once more before I got too big for it. Looks like you've been painting.”

“I have. Thanks so much for that leftover paint. It was perfect.”

“Oh, good.” Marjorie patted a yawn. “I was about to lie down, but Rich called.”

“Oh, no, is something wrong?”

“Not at all. He and the boys were having such a grand time, he decided to take them to the beach.”

“To the beach?” Caroline felt worried.

“Rich said that Joseph really wanted to see the ocean, and they weren't that far away. And it's such an incredibly nice day. Believe it or not, our December weather isn't always like this. And it probably won't last long, either. Anyway, Rich was excited to see Joseph's face when he saw the ocean for the first time.”

Caroline wanted to say she would've enjoyed that, too, but simply dropped the clean paintbrush down to the grass to dry. “Well, that was very nice of Rich. I appreciate it. I know Joe—that's what he wants to be called now, Joe, not Joseph—anyway, he must be over the moon.”

“And the best news is that they probably won't be home until dinnertime. Oh, yeah, Rich got the boys hot dogs. And he told me, Danny said he would take a nap on the beach.” She laughed. “I'll just bet he will.”

“Well, at least he'll be tired when he gets home. You can give him a bath and put him to bed.”

“Sounds lovely. And now, while Lulu's napping, I shall catch some winks myself. We had such a great time last night. Stayed out too late. But you only live once, right?”

Caroline wiped her hands on the back of her dungarees.

“And I want to come down and see whether my sister is a good painter,” Marjorie called over her shoulder as she walked away.

“Anytime,” Caroline called back.

As she went back inside the apartment, she realized that the boys' beach trip was benefiting her with more time to finish things up. If she worked fast, who knew how much she could get done. Her friends who were full-time housewives sometimes marveled at what Caroline was able to accomplish. Caroline never said as much, but she attributed it to being a career woman. You learned to make every minute count.

She pulled out the upholstery fabric she'd fallen in love with yesterday. It was a pleasant print in clean shades of yellow, green, and aqua blue. She had planned to use it for a slipcover for the sad, worn sofa and perhaps some curtains for the small window on the front wall. On closer inspection of the sofa, she realized that she could create a slipcover simply by cutting, wrapping, and tucking the fabric. As a result, she was able to camouflage the unattractive piece with very little sewing. But while she had her sewing machine out, she whipped up a pair of curtains as well. They weren't fancy, but the colors were cheery, and the privacy was welcome. Now she unrolled the large braided rug she'd found at the secondhand store yesterday. It was mostly shades of green…and that made her stop and think of what Terry had said about the stained-glass window.
Seventeen shades of green.

Not that she wanted to think about him. Although it was hard not to. Because really, what were the chances of meeting the same attractive man two days in a row like that? As well as having a conversation? What could it possibly mean? Probably nothing! For all she knew the lovely Evelyn was Terry's wife. And they both appeared to be in their mid-thirties, which usually meant married. And even if they weren't married, what difference did it make? Caroline was not looking for a man. Like she always told everyone, she was content to be single for the rest of her days. No one could replace Joe. Besides, she had little Joe to think of. And she needed to remain focused on him, providing for him.

By four o'clock, she was tweaking and moving things. Playing house. She added a couple of new throw pillows she'd found on sale yesterday. Covered in a spring-green-checked fabric, they looked fabulous with the new slipcover on the sofa. She pulled out the afghan she'd crocheted during the war, draping it over the back of the old rocker that had come with the apartment. Its stripes of varying shades of green seemed to add life to the old chair. She dug out the few pictures she'd brought with her, hanging them on some existing nails until she located a hammer. Then she played with the secondhand-store lamps, trying them out everywhere until she set the floor lamp by the rocker and the table lamp on the end table by the sofa. Perfect.

When she finally finished, the place looked pretty good—bright and clean and cheery. She'd even hung her favorite yellow towels in the bathroom, admiring the color contrast against the aqua blue. And she'd laid down the colorful rag rug her mother had given her a few years ago. The room looked clean and bright now—her son would no longer need to be fearful in here.

She took a quick shower; then, as she laid out some things for their dinner, she turned on the radio she'd set on top of the refrigerator. It was the same set she and Joe had purchased during the first year of their marriage. She turned the tuner until she heard the familiar sweet strains of the Glenn Miller Orchestra playing “Little Brown Jug.” She knew that Glen Miller, like her Joe, had not made it home, but for a refreshing change, his music did not make her sad tonight. Instead, she felt surprisingly lighthearted as she lit the gas flame beneath her old copper teakettle and got out the makings for tea. Home sweet home.

Yoo-hoo?” Marjorie's voice
called down the stairs just as the kettle started to whistle. “Anybody home?”

“Hello,” Caroline called back. She glanced at the cat clock to see it was a bit after five now. “Is Rich back yet?”

“Not yet,” Marjorie answered. “Can Lulu and I come down to see your painting progress?”

“Yes, of course.” Caroline ran to meet her. “Here, let me take Lulu for you. These stairs are steep. Be careful.”

“Thanks.” Marjorie surrendered the baby. “I really do hate these steps. Rich had talked about changing them, but we've been so busy. To be honest, Rich has been feeling guilty about putting you and Joseph—I mean Joe—down here. He'd hoped to have more than just the bedrooms cleaned, but—
what on earth
?” Marjorie stood at the bottom of the steps just staring with a shocked expression. “Are you kidding me?”

Caroline couldn't help but laugh. “It looks a little better, eh?”

“Did you do this? All by yourself?” Marjorie went over to the bright sofa, picking up a pillow and examining it. “This is really pretty.”

“I found those at Fuller's Department Store yesterday,” Caroline explained. “Marked down for their year-end sale.”

“I can't believe you did all this.” Marjorie continued walking around, studying everything and commenting in disbelief.
“How did you do all this?”

“With a little planning and a lot of hard work.” Caroline set Lulu down while she filled her teapot with hot water. “Care for a cup of tea?”

“This is just amazing.” Marjorie peeked into the bathroom. “Truly amazing!”

“Joe helped me paint that room.”

“But it's all so clean and orderly and pretty.” Marjorie returned to the little kitchen area, picking up Lulu. “Did you know your auntie is a miracle worker?” she said to Lulu.

Caroline set the rooster teapot and matching cups and saucers on the table, then returned with a small plate of wafer cookies. “Sorry I didn't have time to bake.” She giggled.

“I am just stunned.” Marjorie continued looking around the room as she sat in the kitchen chair. “Utterly stunned.”

“Oh, it wasn't that hard.” Caroline quickly described some of the things she'd done, trying to play down how much work it had been or how she'd stayed up late last night after Marjorie and Rich got home, working on it.

“But you did all this in less than three days. I have been in my new house for a month now and it doesn't look nearly as nice as this.”

“Of course, it does.” Caroline poured their tea as Marjorie broke a cookie in half for Lulu. “Besides that, you've had your hands full with two little ones. I honestly don't know how you managed to paint those rooms with—”

“Rich's mother watched the kids for me. For almost two weeks. And the most I accomplished was to paint two rooms. Rich's dad did all the rest of the painting.” Marjorie looked somewhat upset.

“But you sewed curtains and—”

“But there's so much
more
to do. Our house looks so bare and boring compared to this, Caroline. It's not fair.”

Caroline laughed as she reached for a cookie. “Your house is about six times bigger than this. It should take at least six times longer to fill it up.”

“But everywhere I look—it's just so perfect. Everything looks like it belongs together. It's so warm and inviting. My house will never look like this.”

“Don't forget that Joe and I were married more than ten years ago. I've still got our wedding gifts, and over the years I've collected other household items. Give yourself time, Margie.”

Marjorie let out a sad sigh. “I don't want Rich to see this,” she said quietly. “He'll think that I've been lazy.”

Caroline laughed heartily at this. “I seriously doubt that. Chasing after two little ones, pregnant with the third, I don't think that's exactly lazy.”

“You should get married again,” Marjorie said suddenly.

“Married?”
Caroline set her cup down. “Where did that come from?”

“Well, look at how domestic you are. I mean, here I've always thought of you as this career girl, but you have a very domestic side to you, too. You would make someone a good wife.”

Caroline chuckled. “Perhaps I think there is more to life than being a good wife.”

“But you're
thirty-one
,” Marjorie reminded her. “If you don't get married soon, you'll be too old to have more children. And think about it—if you hurried up and got married, you could have a baby not too long after I have mine. The cousins could play together and—”

“Oh, Marjorie.” Caroline tried to hide her exasperation. “I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I really have little interest in marrying again.”

“Why?”

“Why…?” Caroline got an unwanted image of Terry just then.

“Yes,” Marjorie insisted,
“why?”

Caroline twisted her wedding band, trying to think of a logical answer.

“And why are you still wearing that?” Marjorie demanded. “Good grief, you might as well hang a sign around your neck that says ‘unavailable' as to go around with your wedding ring on. Really, Caroline.
Why?

With a cookie-smeared face, Lulu clapped her hands together, then pointed to the cookie plate, and Marjorie gave her a whole cookie. As the little cherub happily bit into it, Caroline felt her argument against remarriage growing weaker. The truth was, she would love to have a little girl like Lulu. What woman wouldn't? She looked down at her ring. “I wear this ring because it reminds me of Joe,” she said softly.

“You think you would forget Joe if you took it off?”

“No, of course, not. I'll never forget Joe.”

“What do you think Joe would want for you?”

Caroline pressed her lips together. She knew exactly what he wanted. They had talked about it before he'd gone off to war.

“What would he want for you, Caroline?”

“Joe would want me to be happy,” she answered.

“And never marry again?”

“No, of course not. If you must know, Joe told me that if he didn't make it back, he wanted me to marry again.”

“Aha!” Marjorie shook her finger at her. “And you didn't do it.”

“There was no one around…I mean no one I felt like marrying. And, besides, I know that Joe told me that because little Joseph was so young. He didn't want me to bring him up alone. He said he would need a father. But now Joe's almost ten and—”

“Are you saying Joe doesn't need a father
now
?”

“At least he's got an uncle.” Caroline looked up at the cat clock. “Speaking of that, shouldn't they be home by now?”

“Yes. And I should be getting dinner ready. Are you and Joe joining us?”

Caroline pointed to the kitchen counter where she'd set ingredients for spaghetti. “I thought I'd cook our dinner down here. We can't keep imposing.”

Marjorie looked slightly disappointed. “Well, maybe it's for the best. I think I'll just fix something fast and easy and get Danny to bed. I'm sure he'll be grouchy as a bear.”

“Speaking of the bear.” Caroline leaned her head to one side. “I think I hear a car in the driveway.”

Marjorie stood with Lulu. “Thanks for tea. And don't think we're done with the remarrying conversation, Sis. Really, it's high time you took off that wedding ring.”

  

On Monday morning, Caroline donned a serious-looking suit and went upstairs to ask Marjorie if she minded having Joe for the morning. “I want to put in applications around town, and although I could take Joe with me, it might not look very professional. Plus I'm sure he'd be terribly bored.”

“Joe is welcome here anytime.” Marjorie rinsed a dish. “And since Danny doesn't have preschool and has ants in his pants today, Joe is doubly welcome.”

As if on cue, Danny grabbed Joe's hand. “Come on, buddy, let's go play outside. Okay, Mommy?”

“Okay by me.”

“You be a good helper for Aunt Marjorie.” Caroline blew Joe a kiss as his little cousin tugged him out the back door.

Marjorie set the dish in the drainer, then turned to Caroline. “And you're going to apply at MG Chocolates, right? Rich told me to be sure and remind you to go there. Those assembly line jobs will probably fill quickly.”

“Yes, I'm definitely going there. But I want to stop by some other businesses, too. If I could find a secretarial job, well, I think it would be better than the assembly line…in the long run. Although I'm willing to do whatever it takes to support Joe and me.”

“Good luck.” Marjorie shook her head as she dried her hands. “Although I have to say you look pretty old-fashioned in that outdated suit. Let me guess—you've had it since before the war began. You altered it during the war and then again afterward.”

She looked down at her somber charcoal-colored suit. “Well, I—”

“And, no offense, but wearing your hair like that makes you look like an old schoolmarm.”

Caroline reached up to touch her tightly pinned hair. “I just want to be taken seriously.”

“I know, but this is California, Sis. The style out here is more easygoing and youthful, you know? Women pay more attention to fashion. Especially since the war ended.” She touched her own shoulder-length hair. “Women have been letting their hair down and wearing colorful clothes. And some of us even use lipstick.”

Caroline nodded. “Yes, I sort of gathered that at church yesterday.”

“You went to church?”

Caroline quickly explained about Joe directing their way to church.

Marjorie grabbed Caroline's left hand, staring at her bare ring finger. “At least you've done one thing right.”

Caroline made a sheepish smile. “I thought about what you said. It made sense.” She didn't confess that it had been a tearful moment when she'd removed the ring last night, or that she felt uneasy and vulnerable without it today. “It will probably help when I'm applying for a job. Most businesses feel better about hiring single women.”

“Good for you. And I suppose we can address your wardrobe issues later.”

Caroline just sighed.

“In fact, I think I'm getting a plan.” Marjorie made an impish smile. “A really good plan.”

“Oh, dear!” She made a mock-horrified face.

“Yes!” Marjorie clapped her hands like Lulu. “A perfect plan!”

“What?”

“I'll tell you more when you come home.”

“I can hardly wait,” Caroline said dryly. “Anyway, I doubt I'll be gone long. I should be back by noon.”

“No worries if you're not. Joe is just fine here.”

Caroline told her goodbye, then, feeling a bit like a girl heading out for her first day of school, she walked toward town. As she walked, she prayed a silent prayer, asking God to help her find the right job. And then, since Rich had been so helpful and since he'd even asked Marjorie to remind her, she decided to go to the chocolate factory first. Get it out of the way. The truth was she did
not
want to work the assembly line, but she knew she couldn't afford to turn her nose up at anything. Besides, it wasn't as if they were going to offer her a job today.

As she turned onto Main Street, she remembered that Terry Whatever-His-Last-Name-Was worked in the chocolate factory. Certainly this wasn't the first time this had occurred to her, but it wasn't a comforting thought. Something about the man made her feel off balance, and the idea of running into him was unsettling. She suspected he worked in sales. Attractive guys like him almost always worked in sales. And although they were smooth talkers and not hard on the eyes, she had learned over the years that they were not always to be trusted. She didn't like being judgmental and would never say this to anyone, but she'd found that many of them were disingenuous.

As she came to the big brick building, she paused under the striped awnings of the chocolate shop, gazing into the plate glass window, where all sorts of beautiful chocolates were displayed. Just looking at them made her mouth water.

As she pushed open the big glass door that led into the marble-tiled foyer of MG Chocolates, the first thing that hit her was the aroma—the sweet, heady smell of chocolate nearly swept her off her feet. Had these people considered bottling this scent and selling it as perfume? Next she noticed a large display case filled with colorful candy boxes, stacked in a decorative way. Very pretty.

The sound of a jangling phone reminded her why she was here. And suddenly she felt nervous. But then she reminded herself that she had been a loyal and dependable employee for a total of nearly ten years. She had much to offer. Even if it was on an assembly line. She braced herself, standing up straighter.

“May I help you?” a pretty redheaded woman asked brightly.

BOOK: Your Heart's Desire
11.31Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
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