Authors: Kate Rockland

150 Pounds (43 page)

BOOK: 150 Pounds

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Thunderous applause.

Oprah scanned the audience. “It seems we have one more question, folks.”

Really? Alexis had to pee and hoped they could wrap things up quickly. What else could they possibly say on the subject?

“Yes, I have a question for one of your guests, Alexis Allbright.”

Alexis looked up. She knew that voice. She turned her head, and Shoshana was grinning at her like a loon. So was Oprah. What was this all about? Suddenly she saw Noah standing in the aisle with a microphone. Her heart flipped in her chest.

“Alexis Allbright, mother of my child to be. Would you marry me?”

Shoshana let out a little squeal of glee.

Someone in the audience let out a loud whoop.

Alexis swallowed.

“Well, dear, what do you say?” Oprah asked.

Noah made his way down the aisle, getting clapped on the back by a few people, but he ignored everyone and kept his eyes locked on Alexis’s.

Her voice trembled, then grew stronger: “Yes. Yes, of course I will.”

“She said yes!” Oprah said, beaming. The audience gave them a standing ovation, and the cheering was deafening.

Noah climbed the three steps onto the stage and got down on one knee. Shoshana clapped until her hands hurt. She loved proposals. And weddings. And anything romantic, for that matter. Noah slipped a very small, humble ring on Alexis’s hand. Shoshana loved the diamond; it was small, pear-shaped, and not at all the kind she would have associated with Alexis. She would have figured her for a Tiffany girl. However, the ring was beautiful and Alexis was clearly thrilled.

Noah kissed Alexis, to even more cheering. Alexis’s cheeks were a bright rosy red.

“Well, I love a happy ending,” Oprah said. “And I greatly look forward to reading
Worth the Weight
posts, and having you two back on the show in the near future. I wish you nothing but success,” Oprah said, and she stood up to hug both of her guests before they made an exit off the stage.

Oprah turned to the camera closest to her. “When we get back from break, we have a very special guest returning to the show, my friend and yours, Dr. Oz, here on a break from his own show to talk to us about the importance of eating heart-healthy foods.”

The ceiling camera panned over the audience as they clapped for Alexis and Shoshana, who exited just as they’d come on the show, holding hands. Once they were out of view they grabbed each other tightly and hugged.

“We did it!” Shoshana shouted.

“We really pulled it off!” Alexis screamed.

“You’re getting married!”

“Holy shit, I know! You better be a bridesmaid!”

“I will! I’d wear taffeta for you, I swear!”

They jumped up and down.

Last year felt like a lifetime ago—Shoshana and Alexis couldn’t wait to start pooling their resources of advertisers and contributors. They’d rented a studio above Noah’s restaurant, where they would share a writing space. Neither could have afforded such an extravagance before. Interest from sponsors was already high, and they had plenty of money for the start-up from a combination of Alexis’s inheritance and the money Shoshana had saved from
Fat and Fabulous
advertisements.

Pam watched Shoshana gracefully leave the set, head held high, shoulders back. Grabbing the brand-new soft, pretty pearl-gray coat she’d bought herself that morning in a size XXXL, she couldn’t help but beam with pride as she went to congratulate her daughter backstage. She found her holding a glass of champagne.

Gathered together were Billy, Emily, Alexis, and Noah. “To
Worth the Weight,
” Alexis said, taking a very small sip, then leaning over to give Noah a soft kiss. The tiny diamond glinted on her finger. Shoshana winked at her, and felt the sweet taste of the bubbly slide down her throat. She looked around the room and felt extremely lucky. It didn’t matter if she weighed 150 pounds or 215. What mattered was that she found happiness. And she had. They both had.

Acknowledgments

I’m not sure that anyone ever bothers to read the acknowledgments page, but when I was young and developing a love for reading books it always struck me as a secret passageway into the author’s mind; after the reader lives with fictional characters for many pages, when the book is done they are suddenly thrust into a cold bath of reality, and reminded that the world they’d just inhabited has come to an end. Because of this, I hope the warmth behind my words shines through, spreads cheer, and that the gratefulness I feel is evident.

Thank you to Ryan Fischer-Harbage, my agent, who almost a decade ago allowed a kid just out of college to bombard him with a manuscript and a dream, and made that dream a reality.

This book would have never happened if it weren’t for my amazing editor, Katie Gilligan, who totally
gets
funny, quirky women. Katie, you are not only a smart and talented person, but you run marathons! You are my hero.

Thank you to the entire Thomas Dunne Books team, the art department for creating such a fun cover, and Dave Cole for copyediting
150 Pounds
. Without his dedicated work I would have dates out of order, characters spouting nonsensical sentences, and Shoshana’s bra size wrong.

Thanks also to Kate Harding, author of
Lessons From the Fat-O-Sphere,
which I picked up one day and could not put back down. Thanks for letting me call you up and interview you all the way in Chicago!
Shapely Prose,
though closed down, was a blog that had a huge impact on me.

Thank you to my friend Kevin O’Donnell for helping me come up with a very important expression that Billy uses, and to Dana Spencer for giving birth to the real Noah.

Thank you to my loyal readers, who have not only provided support on Facebook as I wrote
150 Pounds,
but actually bought my first book and therefore made me a writer.

Thank you to my parents, Michael Rockland and Patricia Ard, and my brother, Joshua Rockland, for listening to me talk about this book for two years.

A
LSO BY
K
ATE
R
OCKLAND

Falling Is Like This

Kate Rockland is a frequent contributor to the
New York Times
Styles section and has also written for
Playboy
,
Rolling Stone
, and
Spin.
She is the author of the punk-rock novel
Falling Is Like This
. Kate lives in Hoboken, New Jersey, with her husband, son, and cat, Elizabeth Taylor. She weighs 150 pounds.

For more information, or to have Kate speak to your reading group, please visit her at
www.katerockland.com
.

This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

THOMAS DUNNE BOOKS.

An imprint of St. Martin’s Press.

150
POUNDS.
Copyright © 2011 by Kate Rockland. All rights reserved. For information, address St. Martin’s Press, 175 Fifth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10010.