Advancing ((Advance Industries #2)) (23 page)

“Get her down from there Kye. I don’t care how but get her the fuck away from Charlotte.”

Oh My God this is so messed up. My hands are sweating profusely. I want the ground to swallow me up. I don’t want to be up here while the crowd go wild. The applause is almost deafening but all I can focus on is the gun pointed at my stomach. Strange things are playing in my head – the guy from Kye’s time being shot, the blood, red. The blood on my thighs and on the sheets in the lilac room. My baby, she’s pointing the gun at my baby. I know that’s ridiculous but she knows I’m pregnant. Aim it at my head or my foot not my fucking stomach. I can’t take that again. I’m sure I’d die if she shot me this close but my brain thinks it’s funny letting me imagine I’d live while I lose another child.

I’m a crazy combination of seething mad and piss my pants scared. I look out at the crowd and my eyes lock on Kye’s. I feel mine start to fill with water, if she hurts us he’ll lose it, he’ll break. He’s standing strong but the slight droop of his shoulders and the hardness of his jaw tells me he’s only just holding it together. His eyes are filled with pure anguish, I wish I could just get to him and take away even an ounce of his pain. I watch Trask stride to his side and I stare at them both, silently asking what should I do. I can’t make a rash decision this time. I can’t run, I’m frozen in fear, fear for myself, fear for Kye, but more for our baby who doesn’t deserve this.

I rip my gaze away from them and watch Charlotte delight in the attention she’s receiving. I walk into the gun until it’s firmly pressing my abdomen. That got her attention. I put my mouth to her ear so she’ll hear me amidst the whooping and hollering.

“Charlotte, you’ve won. The presidency is yours. Please... Just let me go.”

“How would that look to my adoring public? Nothing is mine with you alive, you know how it works, they may want me but the title automatically goes to you.”

“I don’t want it. I give it up.”

“SILENCE,” she commands the crowd.

“Miss Ecnavda has something she wants to say and you all need to bear witness to this.” She looks my way “Come around the front of the podium and kneel.” She moves so the gun is now pressed in my back and I shuffle forward with shaking legs. I kneel facing the crowd and hear a collective gasp as Charlotte holds the gun to the back of my head. I close my eyes knowing if I see Kye I won’t hold it together. It’s funny what races through your mind in the moment that you know you’re going to die. A kaleidoscope of images race past and I can’t lock on to one of them to make this any easier, to make this okay and accept what’s about to happen. A tear escapes and trickles down my cheek. I know it’s stupid but I wrap my arms protectively around my stomach. My one and only act as a mother without a child. My heart races, my eyes are squeezed shut so tightly that lights flash behind my lids. I inhale a huge gulp of air which gets lost as it turns into a strangled sob.

BANG! My heart is pounding, if it beats any longer at this pace it’s likely to explode. I can hear a commotion but I can’t grasp what’s happened. No pain, I’m not dead but I can hear gunshots. I open my eyes and see the crowd fleeing in all directions. I turn around slowly and see Charlotte has left the podium and is sheltering on the steps. Kye and Trask rush frantically towards me and I reach out to them. Get me down, please just get me down. My fingertips graze Kye’s hand but then he’s falling almost in slow motion - like time just stands still. It’s stopped as I stare at his tormented eyes. Falling backwards into Trask. Trask raises his gun and fires right past my face. My eyes widen in shock and he catches Kye one handed. Then I see it – red.

Red on Kye’s t-shirt.

Red blurring my vision.

“Nooooooo! No. No. No!” It’s the only word my mind allows me to think, to say and to wail. Just no. I don’t see the audience around me. I don’t hear anything other than the crack in my heart. I don’t feel anything. I don’t
feel
.

Time used to move so slowly when I lived at the labs. The days were filled with dread, never knowing when they were going to come and pluck us from the safety of our room and lead us away for some test or other. The waiting and not knowing was often worse than the actual act itself. The mind is funny, it makes you believe all sorts, it conjures up scenarios that could happen but most likely wouldn’t. It tricks you, it whispers and taunts. There was no set schedule for when we were needed, we were often roused from sleep and groggily taken.

Time with Kye always seemed to move too fast. We never had much time to just enjoy being together, to just enjoy being happy. Our lives were fast paced, filled with adrenaline but also a love that can’t be put into words. Words are responsible for so much but we don’t always have the adequate ones.

Words are often said with no thought.

Words don’t always answer the questions we sought.

Words are responsible for conflict and pain, joyous times and personal gain.

Those are the words to a poem I found and they’ve stuck with me because they’re so true. For a long time, I didn’t speak. What would have been the point? I had no words that were worth saying or worthy of being heard. Silence became my best friend. The only friend I let in.

For the first time, time it seems is on my side – it isn’t rushing past too fast nor ticking by too slowly. It just is. It’s evened out. Because I’ve learnt when time is involved everything can change in an instant.

I’ve found my voice. God, have I found it. Now, I’m in a different kind of pain. The kind I can’t hide away from, I can’t ignore because to get the end result I have to embrace it. I have to push through it.
Push
.

But I don’t want to. Not without him by my side. Not without him holding my hand, filling me with calm. I can’t do this without him. I want him to witness this, the one thing he truly wanted. I want to see his emotion as our baby is brought into the world and I want to witness his eyes when he holds our baby for the first time.

But he isn’t here. He isn’t with me and for us. He promised he’d be here.

So where the fuck is he?

So much has happened, we’ve finally found our footing after his injury. A day I don’t like to look back on. So many secrets were revealed. So many things had to be sorted out and put in place. Trask killed Charlotte after she fired at Kye. I had access to files I would never have seen before and it seems Johnson had a relationship with a starry-eyed young woman named Charlotte. When she gave him a daughter – Destiny, he left her and took the baby to bring up at Advance Industries, he banished her so his wife would never find out about his infidelity and Destiny grew up with me... Until the girls had those chips implanted and she tried to leave. She was the reason the girls knew what would happen if they set foot outside the labs. I almost feel sorry for Charlotte because the way she was treated turned her into the woman she was. Things were revealed about her that made me finally understand why she was the woman she became. I can’t imagine having a child taken from me. I know now why she was so bitter, why her exterior was so hard, so unforgiving and unrelenting. I’m not sorry that she’s gone, though. She almost took Kye from me and that’s something I could never forgive.

Fraser was another dilemma. I just didn’t have the patience to deal with him when Kye needed looking after. I didn’t have the stamina to order his death. Too much death followed us that day so it was decided he’d be locked away, in his own private cell. Most of the team left after Kye recovered, Jonah in the hopes of finding May, his belief that the future has righted itself was staggering and as he has yet to return I pray that it has. Walker, Palmer and Trask left too. I begged Trask not to leave but he argued it was for the best and that it would be what Kye wants. It hurt for a long time but I know now why he went. I needed him but it was too painful for him to want me as more than a friend, to watch me with Kye when he wished it was him. I hate that it changed our friendship and I know he does too but the heart wants what it wants and sometimes it doesn’t always get lucky. I hope I see him again one day but I also pray he finds what I have with Kye. I want him to be happy.

Saunders, Arlen and Cal chose to stay, for the time being anyway. They each have their reasons but only Cal’s makes me smile. They weren’t leaving anyone behind in their time and it made sense. Saunders wanted to be here for the birth of our baby. Arlen is a tech genius and wanted to stay to help me with my new role as leader. And Cal, besides the fact he dotes on Kye, he’s finally had his head turned. I constantly worry about how their remaining in my time will work. It shouldn’t be possible. I still wake every day expecting Kye to say today’s the day he travels back for his grandparents, just to see with his own eyes that the future has been restored to how he remembers it. He says I worry too much, but if I don’t, who will?

If Kye hadn’t danced with death just months ago, I’d be threatening to kill him myself. But those words aren’t productive. I made a deal that if he pulled through I’d never speak in vain again. At the time, I promised all sorts but promises are easily broken. Sometimes life gets in the way and our actions are out of our control.

That’s why I’m willing to cut him some slack but if Saunders looks at me with a shit-eating grin one more time while telling me to push I might not be as understanding.

“You push!” I yell at him. My patience is wearing thin. I’m in pain, a shit load of pain. Kye isn’t here and Saunders is getting on my last nerve.

I’m in the presidential home, in my bedroom where I thought I’d feel more relaxed but turns out labour isn’t conducive to relaxation. I also thought it was embarrassing talking to him about my body but now he’s actually seeing my private bits that only Kye has ever seen. I started off shy but now I’m flashing him like my life depends on it. I never knew my legs could part this wide. I’m panting, hot as hell, my face is burning clean off. My hair is stuck to my head and I know I look as unattractive as possible... but none of it matters.

“Where the fuck is he?” I scream through another contraction.

The door flies open with such force I’m shocked it’s still attached to the hinges. “I’m here, Sweetheart. God baby I’m so sorry.” He rushes to my side looking as dishevelled as I feel and I breathe my relief out in a quick puff.

He curls his fingers around mine and squeezes gently, grinning at me adoringly. His look soon falls as I squeeze his hand through the pain and I swear if he winces I’ll kick him.

“I can’t do this, Kye.”

He presses a kiss to my knuckles. “You can, baby.”

“No, Kye, I fucking can’t.” I glare at him.

He chuckles, actually fucking chuckles. Is my pain amusing? Because I’m happy to demonstrate some pain of my own. This is no laughing matter. Why do women go through this more than once? Who in their right mind would want other children after experiencing this? Once this baby is out I’m closing my legs and never opening up shop again. Kye will have to learn to be in a sex-free relationship because this is non-negotiable.

“Man, I’m glad you’re here,” Saunders tells Kye as he claps him on the back. “Her language was making me start to blush.”

Kye barks out a throaty laugh and I give him daggers.

“Oh shit.” I gasp as I bear down again. “Fuuuucckkk!” I squeeze Kye’s hand and fall back exhausted. Apparently my labour has been quick, Saunders thought it was helpful to tell me about some women going through this for days.

“Can’t you give her something?” Kye asks Saunders.

“Don’t you think I tried? She refused.”

“Baby I know you hate medication but this will help with the pain. Why turn it down?” He uses his pleading eyes but I’m in too much pain to care. The gold flecks that are usually hidden sparkle at me and I wonder if he can make them do that on command. This is probably the only time those gorgeous eyes won’t suck me in.

“Nuh uh. No drugs are being pumped into my body. I prefer the Goddamn pain to that,” I pant again as I shake my head at him.

“Come on, Faith, big push and this will all be over,” Saunders says.

“You said that before arsehole,” I snap.

They both chuckle this time. I grit my teeth and push for all my worth. I think I’m pooing myself but I’m way past embarrassment. My face feels blown up like a puffer fish and I think I might burst a blood vessel or ten.

I feel a bulge between my legs and freak out, is the baby half in half out? It’s the weirdest feeling ever. Something just hanging between my legs like I’ve sprouted my own set of balls.

I lie back again and catch my breath. Kye let’s go of my hand and walks to the end of my bed.

“What are you doing!” I screech sitting up quickly. “Up top Kye, stay up top,” I warn him.

“But...”

“Don’t but me. Please just stay by my head. It’s bad enough Saunders is looking.”

Kye’s face darkens as if he’s only just realised that Saunders has a very nice view of his favourite place but he shakes it off quickly when I start groaning again. If he sees the mess happening down there I doubt it’ll be his favourite place for much longer. Hell, maybe I should let him look, let him be scarred by this, especially as I have no intention of letting him near there ever again. Saunders tells me the head is out and this next push should do the trick.

I don’t really remember pushing all I know is that all of a sudden I’m no longer in pain. I’m knackered and all my muscles are used to capacity but I’m not hurting. A small cry fills the room.

It’s the only sound in here until it intensifies and I start blubbering. I look to Kye who is also swiping tears away. My strong man is reduced to a puddle of mush. I reach my hand out to him and he grips it tightly, holding it to his cheek as his tears fall freely.

This right now is what I’ve been missing.

Family.

My baby is placed in my arms and Saunders who has turned into a big pile of goo as well congratulates me on my beautiful baby boy. I can’t believe I have a son. I’m mesmerised by him, he’s so tiny. I can’t stop staring at him and quickly check he has all his fingers and toes. I run my finger over his chubby cheeks, he’s so soft. Knowing we created him is the best feeling in the world. Kye hovers next to me patiently waiting for his turn and places a delicate kiss on our son’s head. My heart almost bursts. This is too good to be true, I’m almost waiting for the punchline. I close my eyes and rest my head back, shaking away my fears. Not all good is followed by bad. It’s my new mantra for when I become overwhelmed with how good my life is. I’m always waiting for the catch.

His eyes latch on to mine before his lips slant and claim me. “Thank you.” He murmurs. “Thank you so much, baby.”

I hold out my arm to pass him his son and as I do, more pain strikes. “OH MY GOD,” I bellow.

Saunders frowns at me before peering between my legs yet again and his hand flies to his mouth.

“What? What is it?” Kye asks.

“Um... She’s not finished yet.”

“WHAT?” I yell.

“Uh... I don’t know how we missed this but um... seems you are having twins after all.”

“Nuh uh...” I shake my head adamantly. “I already did my job. I had a baby already. I’m not doing
that
again.”

“I’m afraid you are.” He shrugs like it’s not all his fault that this is a ridiculous shock to the system. How could he not know?

“Tell him, Kye,” I demand as the bloody panting returns.

He blanks me completely. His jaw is wide open as he rocks with the baby. But he’s so mesmerised by the tiny human in his arms I’m not sure he cares. Great, he’s speechless.

“Owww,” I wail, this is unfair, so frigging unfair. I’ve already done my part. We haven’t prepared for two babies. What the hell?

“Saunders, how the hell did you miss this? How many more are likely to pop out?” I demand.

He rubs the back of his neck, “I don’t know Faith, I really don’t. Maybe you never miscarried? Maybe you were carrying triplets?” he shrugs as if that answer is good enough.

“That’s too many maybe’s Saun. You’re the doctor for fuck sake...” I inhale sharply again, my grilling Saunders momentarily forgotten as the pain picks up. I will have him for this, though.

We’re alone with our babies finally. I’m sure I went to sleep after baby number two made her unexpected appearance. It doesn’t feel like I’ve slept, though. Kye is passed out in the chair next to me and I prop myself up to run my eyes over him. He’s been through so much. His strength took a battering after election day. I nearly lost him. I nearly lost my happily ever after and I thank my lucky stars every day that he fought to stay. He promised to never leave me and that’s one promise he hasn’t gone back on.

There’s a small knock on the door before it opens and a beaming Cal walks in followed by Hope. She’s still shy around him but I’ve watched him chip away at her, break down her barriers and I love it. I love that she’s found her someone even if they won’t admit it. I see how they look at each other, it’s the same way Kye looks at me. I never would’ve thought Cal was capable of being anything other than the joker but I have to give it to him, he’s good for her, patient and caring – they’re so cute together. I love how he is with her, though tensions between us were fraught in the beginning.