Read All New Letters From a Nut Online

Authors: Alan. Ted L.,Marder Nancy

All New Letters From a Nut (12 page)

BOOK: All New Letters From a Nut
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Full text of the above letter to follow.

1413 1/2 Kenneth Rd. #193
Glendale, CA 91201

Customer Service
Harriet Carter Gifts,
425 Stump Road,
North Wales, PA. 19454.

Aug 21, 2009

Dear Harriet Carter Gifts,

Thank you for writing me back regarding your Electronic Throat Clearing Machine and Satin Sleep Cap. It’s a wonderful item!

Now I want to know if you have the ELECTRIC CHAIR. This is the chair that is designed to shock those peoples that need punishment. It is a wooden chair that you are strapped into. A wet spongy leather cap is placed on your head (after shaving your head & leg) Can i use the Satin Sleep Cap? Then the Harriet Carter volt lever is pulled & 2,000 volts go through the offender. Some mess may occur. Do you carry this item? And maybe an Electric End Table to go with it?

Also do you have Toe Socks as others have told me?

Harriet Carter is the finest co. out there for these kinds of items. I tell many about you and your dedication to helping your customers. At times I need to be addressed as F.D. Nancy. Sometimes Fred. But now F.D.

Sincerely,

(F.D. Nancy)

Full text of the above letter to follow.

Harriet Carter Gifts, Inc.
425 Stump Road
North Wales, PA 19454
215–361–5122

08/27/2009

MR F D NANCY
#193
1413 1/2 KENNETH RD
GLENDALE, CA 91201

Dear MR F D NANCY,

Thank you for your letter and inquiry.

We do not carry the Electric Chair. But we do carry Toe Socks (please see enclosed picture).

Thank you for your kind words about our company. It is a pleasure to serve you.

Sincerely Yours,
HARRIET CARTER GIFTS

B9842 - TOE SEP SOCKS

6.98 a pair

Catalog: 39 Page: 023

Toe-separating socks keep your piggies apart, dry and healthy. Just slip on these soft, comfy open-toe socks for relief from a variety of toe and foot problems. They gently separate toes to help keep medicine in place, absorb moisture, prevent athlete’s foot, blisters and corns. Made of machine-washable cotton/spandex. One size fits most. One pair. Imported.

Full text of the above letter to follow.

1413 1/2 Kenneth Rd. #193
Glendale, CA 91201

Customer Service
Harriet Carter Gifts,
425 Stump Road,
North Wales, PA. 19454.

Sep 2, 2009

Dear Harriet Carter Gifts,

Thank you for answering me regarding the Electric Chair. I am sorry you do not carry it.

Now. I was wondering if you carry the GAS CHAMBER. This is the compartment designed to gas those peoples that need punishment. Harriet Carter cyanide pellets are plopped into the compartment. The curtain is then opened allowing the witnesses to observe the punishee. A Harriet Carter lever is pulled and the poison gas is sucked in through the nostrils. Responses can include convulsions and excessive drooling. Do you carry this?

Also do you have DOG VESTS?

Harriet Carter is the best company i have ever heard of for customer service, customer dedication, and general customer (need another word here) I will note it in my folder.

Respectfully,

Full text of the above letter to follow.

PLEASE EXCUSE OUR INFORMALITY
.

By using this note we are able to give you an immediate answer. We feel this is more important than sending a formal reply which could take several days.

We do not carry the “Gas Chamber” or any pest repellant with your description

Harriet Carter Gifts
Customer Service Dept.
425 Stump Road
North Wales, PA 19454

PLEASE EXCUSE OUR INFORMALITY. By using this note we are able to give you an immediate answer to your inquiry. We feel this is more important than sending a formal reply which could take several days.

The item is still available. Our item number and price is:

We have included order form and envelope for your convenience. Thank you for writing to Harriet Carter.

Harriet Carter Gifts
PO Box 2400
North Wales PA 19454–0911

Full text of the above letter to follow.

1413 1/2 Kenneth Rd. #193
Glendale, CA 91201

Customer Service
Harriet Carter Gifts,
425 Stump Road,
North Wales, PA, 19454.

Nov 21, 2009

Dear Harriet Carter Gifts,

Thank you for answering me regarding my last letter on my Gas Chamber item. I am sorry you do not carry it.

Now. I was wondering if you carry the SOLITARY CONFINEMENT CELL. This is the Harriet Carter Adjustment Cell for those offenders that need punishment in a Secured Housing Unit with no human contact. Includes the Harriet Carter metal bed bolted to the wall and the Harriet Carter metal toilet. The offender is locked down 23 hours a day, only allowed 1 hr outside his cell for Harriet Carter exercise. He is fed only Harriet Carter Bread & Water. Also can be used as a Pet carrier. Do you carry this?

Also do you have the SMART MOP? It soaks up ten times its weight in water.

Harriet Carter is the best company i have ever heard of for dedicated and devoted customer service, customer devotedness, and allegiance (customer) & answering customer letters. I will note it in my folder. (and show others)

BOOK: All New Letters From a Nut
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