Becoming His: The Teaching of Rebecca (3 page)

Rebecca simply nodded and turned to follow as the woman stepped back into the stairwell.  She climbed and climbed until they reached the very top of the house.  She briefly wondered why Miss Lambert had made her go all the way to the kitchen only to have to climb the stairs again but pushed the thought aside as Mrs. Williams walked down a narrow hallway and opened a door.  She stepped aside to allow Rebecca to enter.  Rebecca gasped.  The room was tiny and crowded with two cots that took up most of the floor space.  The only other pieces of furniture in the room were a small table that had one chair and a washbasin that held a washbowl and pitcher.  There was no wardrobe or dresser.  Instead, several hooks hung on the wall beside the cots and a small shelf was hung above them. There was barely enough room for the two of them to stand together.

“You’ll be sharing a room with Patsy.  She works in laundry and will help teach you when you are ready.  Just put your bag on the cot for now.  Go ahead and begin to undress while I find you a uniform.  I’ll be right back to help you out of your corset.” 

Rebecca watched as the woman left the room and in a daze, stepped to the cot she had indicated and sat down wearily.  She put her face in her hands suddenly drained of her strength.  She wanted nothing more than to lie down and sleep.  Instead, she heard Mrs. Williams return. 

“Oh sweetie, come along.  You don’t have time to rest.  Dinner needs to be prepared and served.  Come on, let me help you dress.” 

Rebecca stood and was silent as her dress was unbuttoned and removed.  She had always been helped to dress by servants but found herself feeling shamed as the older woman chuckled after untying and pulling down the first of many petticoats for Rebecca to step out of.    “Goodness gracious, I don’t see how you young women even move in all these clothes.  No matter, you won’t be needing these and, believe me, you would simply pass out having to dress so while working.” 

Rebecca still didn’t speak and found herself soon down to her corset cover, corset, chemise and her drawers. For the first time in her life, she actually thought about the unique differences among the classes.  The girls she had grown up with had been pampered their entire lives and thought nothing of changing their ensembles several times a day.  Rebecca had never once given thought to the poor servants that picked up after her.  She had never given a thought to the far simpler uniforms that had surrounded her from birth.  She could tell from the soft roundness of the kinder woman helping her that no corsets or heavy petticoats could possibly be hidden under her plain black dress.  Rebecca blushed as the woman unlaced her corset and removed it.  Rebecca felt immediately cooler as the room was unspeakably warm. 

“You have time for a quick wash up before we go.  There is soap and I brought you a washrag and a towel.  Remember, these are for you to use all week so make sure you hang them to dry after each use.” 

Rebecca simply nodded and poured a bit of water into the basin.  She wet the rag and pressed it against her hot face.  She felt her eyes fill and forced her tears back.  She would not cry!  Instead, she scrubbed her face and neck glad of the coolness of the water.  Once done, she dropped the cloth and dried her face on the thin towel that Mrs. Williams handed to her.  She dropped that as well.  “No Missy!  Pick it up and wring out your washrag.  You hang them on the hooks there.  You don’t want them to get dirty and musty before washday.” 

Rebecca hung them on the hooks beside the washstand.  She spoke for the first time.  “Ummmm, I saw some girls washing already.  Should I just ask them to wash these?” 

Mrs. Williams laughed and said, “Goodness no, child.  Patsy and Molly and the other girls do not tend to our wash until Sunday.  They have enough to do keeping all the upstairs ladies in clean clothing and towels.  I think it is ridiculous that they drop their clothing and towels all over their rooms but it is not my place or concern.  You’ll learn soon enough I’m sure.  Now, hurry up and put this on.” 

Rebecca took the plain gray dress that was pressed into her hands.  It was totally shapeless.  She drew it over her head and it fell to cover her feet.  Rebecca wrapped the white apron around her waist, tying it in the back.  The apron hung to her ankles.  With a chuckle, Mrs. Williams untied it, pulled her dress up so that her feet were free and then wrapped the long ends around Rebecca’s waist twice before tying them again in the back. 

“Thank you,” Rebecca said softy. 

Mrs. Williams’ heart ached for the poor thing.  It might not be obvious as to why this young woman had found herself downstairs, but it was definitely obvious she was in some sort of shock.  “You are welcome.  Now you are almost ready.  Here you go honey.” 

Rebecca took the remaining items handed to her.  She blushed as she realized she was holding a pair of muslin drawers and a pair of black stockings.  She looked up, her face red. 

“Fancy drawers have no place in the kitchen Rebecca.  These might not be too pretty but they will serve you well.”  

Rebecca simply nodded and reached under her new uniform and untied her soft, white drawers edged in lace.  She stepped out of them and then remembered to pick them up and place them on the bed beside her other discarded clothing.  She stepped into the drawers handed to her and was shocked to see they had no closing seam up the middle of the legs.  She looked over in confusion. 

“They are split crotch miss.  You’ll find these useful for when you need to do your necessary as well as…well, never you mind.  Hurry up now.” 

Rebecca pulled the horrid undergarment up and tied it as tightly as possible.  She felt horribly exposed though she was covered.  She finally pulled on the simple black stockings and tied the plain garters around her thighs.  The plain black shoes were too large but Mrs. Williams stuffed some paper into the toes to make the fit tighter.   When she stood, Mrs. Williams looked her over. 

“Well, you are a very tiny little thing aren’t you?  I couldn’t tell under all that clothing.  I’ll try to find you a smaller uniform and undergarments but these will have to do for now.” 

Rebecca looked down to see the drawers already slipping off her thin frame.  She grabbed at them and tried to tug them back up.  Mrs. Williams shook her head and without a word, pulled the uniform up and then dragged the drawers up over Rebecca’s tiny bottom.  Rebecca blushed but said nothing.  She felt the excess fabric gathered at her waist and then pinned into place.  “That should hold them up for today.  I’ll make it a priority to find ones that fit.  It simply wouldn’t do for you to lose your drawers while working.” 

Deciding that she was as presentable as she could be for now, Mrs. Williams quickly undid the pins holding Rebecca’s beautiful hair up.  Rebecca stood still as the woman brushed through the waist length locks as quickly as possible and then braided the strands into a heavy plait down her back. “There, your hair is lovely Rebecca.  You’ll find it much cooler and much easier to care for when all that is needed is to brush and plait it.”

“Tha….thank you for your help,” Rebecca said, her eyes dropping to her clothing on the bed.  It might not have been as current or as fashionable as some of her classmates, but it was definitely more elaborate than the plain drab uniform she was currently wearing.  The stockings itched against her tender skin and the looseness of muslin of her drawers made her acutely uncomfortable.  She blushed remembering how exposed she truly was. 

Mrs. Williams picked up the clothing and said softly, “This is new for you Rebecca.  I know it seems impossible right now but you’ll find that it doesn’t have to be horrible.  Just do your work and learn as fast as you can.  Be obedient and follow the rules.  You’ll discover that most of the staff is quite friendly and more than willing to help you.  However, none of us can step in if you run afoul of Miss Lambert, Mr. Danvers or the upstairs faculty.  I don’t know why you are here but promise to try to make it as comfortable as possible.” 

Rebecca nodded, her eyes filling at the kindness being offered.  It was the first she had been offered in months.  She took a deep breath and brushed the tears from her cheeks.  She gave a tentative smile and held out her arms for the clothing.  “Thank you again.  I’ll do the best I can.  Perhaps you can find a place to store these? I have a feeling I won’t be needing them.” 

Mrs. Williams smiled, glad to see the girl attempting to make the best of what must be an appalling situation.  Together, they emptied the valise of all but a few items which Rebecca put on the shelf above her cot.  Mrs. Williams took the valise, promising to keep Rebecca’s things safe.  She led Rebecca back down the numerous stairs until they were once again in the kitchen. 

If Rebecca had thought the activity in the room was busy before, it was positively frantic now.  Mrs. Williams handed her a broom with instructions to sweep the room as best she could without interfering with anyone’s activities.  Rebecca nodded and began to sweep around the edges as she watched the others perform almost a dance.  Pots and pans were stirred and soon dozens of bowls of fragrant soup were being carried through the door into the large dining hall.  Rebecca felt her stomach growl but ignored it as no one else was eating or even looking like they’d be eating any time soon.  She hadn’t eaten much lunch and missed tea but could only hope that she’d be allowed at least a slice of bread before bedtime.  Too shy to ask any questions, she kept her eyes down and worked at manual labor for the first time in her life.

It wasn’t for several more hours before Rebecca was given a chance to rest.  After the evening meal had been served, which consisted of several courses as well as dessert, she was able to sweep most of the floor without running into another person.  She was told to put her broom away and help with the huge pile of dishes.  She had never thought about all the plates, bowls, glasses and endless silverware needed to feed dozens of people.  She scraped food into pails and thought about stuffing an uneaten roll into her mouth.  She resisted the urge and watched as a few young boys came into the kitchen to remove the buckets.  She had no idea of what they would do with what seemed to be a huge waste of food to her.  Her attention was focused on washing dish after dish, her hands quickly growing red and swollen in the scalding water.  She never once complained and kept her head down and her hands busy.  She handed a washed dish to the girl drying and it slipped and fell to the floor.  At the sound of the shattered plate, the room froze.  The girl looked up quickly, her eyes wide.

“I’m sorry!  It just slipped!”  Rebecca nodded knowing it had been an accident and wondered at the fear in the girl’s eyes.  She didn’t have to wonder long.

“Millicent!  Come here immediately!”  Rebecca’s heart pounded at the voice.  She didn’t have to turn around to know that Miss Lambert had obviously returned to the kitchen.  She realized she hadn’t been frightened until this moment.  “You too, Rebecca!” 

Rebecca shook but dried her hands on her apron and turned to follow the poor girl.  Soon, both were standing in front of the very unhappy headmistress.  “Hands!”  Rebecca was confused until she saw Millicent hold out her hands, palms up.  She followed her example.  She was horrified to see a large ruler slap down onto the upturned palms.  The loud smack filled the room.  Millicent moaned as the ruler slapped into her right palm a dozen times and then a dozen were applied to her left. 

By the time the ruler stopped, both palms were very red and Millicent had tears rolling down her face.  “Th…thank you for disciplining me, Miss Lambert.  I’m….I’m sorry for breaking the plate.” 

Edna simply nodded and then turned her attention and her ruler to Rebecca.  “Honestly, you’d think you could make it through a day without being disobedient.  Hold your hands out and don’t you dare move them.” 

Rebecca was ashamed and wanted to defend both herself and Millicent.  It had been an accident but she took her cue from the other girl.  She held out her palms and though she flinched and bit her lip at the intense and sharp pains from each slap of the ruler, she refused to cry out.  It seemed that Miss Lambert was unsatisfied and hit Rebecca much harder than she had Millicent.  Still, she could only do so much.  Once the two dozen had been given, Rebecca said, “Thank you, I’m sorry the plate broke.” 

Edna gave her an ugly smile and said, “You’ll address me properly young lady and make a proper apology as well or you will find yourself bent over, your drawers parted and this ruler applied to your naked posterior.” 

Rebecca’s face flamed at the threat and she suddenly understood what Mrs. Williams had meant about the ease of wearing split drawers. She forced herself to say.  “Forgive me, Miss Lambert.  Thank you, ma’am for disciplining me.  I’m sorry for breaking the plate.” 

Knowing the words were false, but unable to find just cause for further discipline, Edna said, “The cost of the dish will come out of your wages, Rebecca.” 

Rebecca simply nodded not even having known she was to get wages.  She saw Millicent open her mouth and knew she would try to take the blame.  Before the girl could speak, Rebecca said, “Yes ma’am.  I’ll be more careful ma’am.” 

Edna glared at her but turned away.  She stalked out of the kitchen, slamming the door behind her.  Millicent looked up in awe at the new girl.  “You didn’t have to say that.  I dropped the plate.” 

Rebecca gave her a small smile as she rubbed her hands together in an effort to ease their burning.  “It’s okay.  I didn’t rinse it well enough and it was slippery with soap.  Let’s just try not to break another?” 

Millicent smiled and they returned to the sink of dishes.  When the last one was finally rinsed and dried, they carefully stacked them in the cupboards.  Rebecca was exhausted and realized that all this work would be repeated again and again and again.  She stood in the kitchen and then suddenly grinned.  She might have gotten her hands spanked for breaking a plate, but, by God, she had made it through! 

She heard Mrs. Williams calling her and then found herself seated around the huge table.  The staff ate family style, passing bowls and platters and pouring from pitchers of milk and water.  Rebecca found she enjoyed the simpler food and the company far more than she had upstairs where the girls were under constant supervision for proper etiquette.  In the dining hall, conversation was kept to whispers and that was only risked when both Mr. Danvers and Miss Lambert weren’t in attendance.  In the kitchen, voices were raised in laughter.  Everyone was laughing as one of the upstairs maids told a story of one student who had made her produce pair after pair of those fancy drawers until the girl was satisfied that the lace on the accepted pair was properly ironed.  The girl laughed until she looked up and saw Rebecca.  Her face flushed and she murmured, “Oh, sorry Miss.  I didn’t mean….”