Captured Miracle (10 page)

“She will.” I pleaded. “I promise, she’ll believe me.”

“The conversation is over.” He stated and I stared up at him numbly.

He was dismissing the conversation of me contacting my mother? And so easily? How could this beautiful, strong, powerful man be so monstrous? He was a cruel beast of a man who was slowly sucking the life and humanity out of my heart. Never before had I longed to hurt someone the way I ached to cause Calix pain. I had never been this girl. I had never wanted to physically hurt another living creature before - but Calix was changing me. He was awakening within me a side I longed to keep dormant.

“If I ever get the chance,” I glared up into his hypnotic blue eyes. “I’ll kill you.”

Chapter 9

I watched the corners of his lips curl up into a grin that stilled the blood in my veins. Cold seeped through my skin all the way down into my bones as I stared up into his face. The angles of his face casting shadows in the dim light of the setting sun made me shiver hauntingly. He looked evil. Pure, radiant evil.

“I’m going to tell you for the last time, Nova, that you are mine.” He dug his fingers painfully into my waist and I gasped. “You are mine to do with as I please. I guarantee that you will never be rid of me so easily, Nova. For the rest of your life, you will belong to me. I suggest you banish the ridiculous notion that you will ever be free of me.”

His words were spoken with such confidence that I almost believed them. But then I found myself, but just as I opened my mouth to argue with him, he spoke. “You’ll get yourself ready for bed now, and then we’re going to get into bed.” His eyes were firm on my face. “Together.”

“No.” I shook my head and he growled low in his throat. His hands tightened on my waist and I cried out, more from surprise than pain, when he threw me over his shoulder. Like a sac of potatoes, he carried me from the balcony into his bedroom. Slamming the door shut, he walked brusquely to the bathroom. Screaming in rage and humiliation, I pounded his back with my fisted hands. “You asshole! Put me down!”

As soon as the words left my mouth, I felt Calix’s hand slap down hard on my bottom. Through the sheer material of my dress, my rear stung from the bite of his slap. Bucking against his shoulder I dug my nails into his back and screamed another curse. “You fucking monster!” I sobbed, hiccupping on the word
monster
. “I hate you!”

Calix didn’t slap my rear this time. Instead, he spun on his heel, no longer intent on walking me to the bathroom. Rather, he was moving quickly to the bed. My heart slammed furiously in my chest as I felt Calix stop walking, his hands gripping my hips tightly. As though I weighed no more than a feather, Calix lifted me from his shoulder to drop me onto the bed. My entire body bounced once before Calix planted his hand against my lower belly, holding me down on the bed. I couldn’t even get my heels dug into the mattress to push myself away from him because the brute was standing so close. With my legs dangling over the edge and my back pressed tightly against the mattress, I felt exposed and vulnerable. I wanted to lift my knees into my chest, but I knew that lifting my knees would only spread my legs to him. I couldn’t bear such an action, so I remained spread out on the bed for him.

A new bout of tears was already falling from my eyes. The hot water seared the skin of my temples before disappearing into my hair - but unlike the time before - I wasn’t panicked. I was just sad. Almost dead inside. There was next to no fight left in me. Calix was going to do what he wanted to do regardless of my desires and needs. There was nothing I could do to stop him, and trying was simply a waste of energy.

Yet, despite the inner excuses in my mind - I knew the truth of my sudden loss of fight.

My mother
thought
I was being tortured. She was going through the horror of imagining such a terror - yet I wasn’t living it. I felt
guilty
. I felt guilty for the lack of physical harm I’d lived through, because I knew my mother and sisters were living that very horror in their minds. And that was worse than anything I could ever have to live through physically. Not knowing truly is agonizing. I understood that statement now.

“Do what you want, Calix.” My tone was lifeless and he frowned down at me. “Do your worst. Punish me. Hurt me. Fuck me.” More silent tears streamed down my face. “Break me. I. Don’t. Care.”

He didn’t reply. For long moments, he simply stood there watching me. His expression was unreadable, but for a second - a flash of pain flared in his eyes - and then it was gone as though it had never even been there. I wanted to feel nothing for him, but that burst of pain was so raw - I knew it was the very thing that was fueling him today. That pain had fueled his decision to take me.

And that very pain would fuel his decision now.

“Are you comfortable in your dress?” He asked gravelly.

What? He seriously wanted to know if I was comfortable? I didn’t answer. I was too dumbstruck by the change in his persona to engage in such ridiculous pleasantries.

Calix raised his hands to the buttons of his dress shirt and I watched as he started to pull the buttons through the holes. He raised a single brow at me. “Are you comfortable, Nova?”

Slowly, I nodded. “As comfortable as I’ll ever be.”

He stopped moving. “Would you prefer to sleep in pajamas?” He cocked his head. “Naked?”

A frown pinched my expression. “I’m fine in the dress.”

I really would have preferred pajamas, but that would require me getting undressed and I didn’t know where he would want me to do that. In front of him? Surely, he would have given me privacy to change?

As soon as I had the thought, I wanted to kick my mental ass for being filled with such high hope. Calix wasn’t noble. He would never give me permission to undress away from him.

“Then get into the bed.” He undid the last button and I watched in something that resembled awe as he shrugged his shoulders out of his shirt.

Calix was big. In his clothes, the man was imposing. But out of them the man was all consuming. His body resembled something a male model would aspire to be. He was large and every muscle was intricately defined and molded to perfection. His skin appeared to be sun kissed, though I didn’t exactly envision Calix working shirtless in the sun. His golden tan was natural - a part of his skin.

From broad shoulders hung thick strong arms. As he clenched and unclenched his fists, the veins in his arms raised up beneath his skin in thick blue rivers. His chest was hard and defined and his stomach sported washboard abs. This man worked hard to accumulate the utter perfection that was his body.

No matter how I tried, I couldn’t seem to tear my eyes away from his form. He was captivatingly beautiful. I’d always thought I would be attracted to a man who was lean - a runner, maybe. But Calix was all muscle - he was a fighter. I sensed the will to fight within this man the same way I sensed that very will in a feral dog. It was animalistic. Primal. Calix.

“Do you like what you see, love?” Calix’s deep voice interrupted my study of him and I blushed. I felt the heat of my embarrassment tint my skin from my toes to the tip of my head. It swooped through my body in a rush of warmth that made me feel almost dizzy.

I didn’t say anything as I stared up at him from where he’d thrown me onto the bed. Bending at the waist, Calix planted both hands on either side of my head. Leaning over me in such a way made my insides clench in fear - and something else. Awareness?

His voice was gruff, “Did you want me to continue, love? Maybe you really do want me to punish you?”

I scowled up at him. “No.”

He chuckled. “Did you enjoy my punishment so much last time?” I watched as his eyes moved from where they had trained themselves on my face to flicker down over my throat, my heaving chest, my stomach - and lower. “You’re not nearly as indifferent to me as you’d like me to believe.”

He looked back up to meet my eyes and I spoke. “Then you’re an idiot. Because I hate you with everything inside of me.”

He grunted. “Nova, I think you’re the fool. You’re attracted to me. You can’t help it, much less fight it.”

“I’d like to go to bed, now.”

His lip curled at the corner, sliding into a coy half-grin. “So eager.”

“Screw you.” I bit out the words, wiggling from beneath him across the bed.

He pointed to the side of the bed he was standing on. “This is your side, Nova.”

I looked at him incredulously. “You’re picking sides?”

He shrugged. “I don’t want you near the door.”

“Seriously?” I scoffed. “You think I’m going to try and escape?”

“No.” His eyes met mine. “You couldn’t even if you tried.”

“Why is that?”

Calix grinned. “Door’s locked. I have the key.”

I hadn’t seen him lock the door, but it figures. He wouldn’t want to take the chance of little old me running through his house in the dead of the night. No, that could be bad. “If you’ve locked the door, I won’t be able to get out. Why don’t you want me sleeping next to it?”

He shrugged, “Someone else might find a way in.”

“Someone like who?”

“Does it matter?” Calix asked pointedly. “I don’t want you sleeping by the door as a precaution.”

“You think I’d hurt someone who came in here?” Wow, he might have been watching me for two years - but he knew
nothing
about me if he thought I was capable of hurting another living creature.

He sighed, running a hand through his inked hair. “I don’t think you’ll hurt anyone, Nova. I don’t want to take the chance of someone hurting
you
.”

I was stunned and it took me a moment to utter, “You would protect me?”

“With my life.” His tone was resolute.

It sent chills travelling over my spine. Calix confused the hell out of me! I just didn’t understand him, his motives, his actions, his mind. Nothing about him made any sense to me. And I didn’t like that. It made me severely uncomfortable. I’d always been studious - I worked every angle of my mind until I understood something that puzzled me, but I doubted, no matter how many angles I considered in regards to Calix, that I would ever understand him. Hell, I wouldn’t even scratch the surface of understanding this man - my captor.

“But,” I paused. “But you took me. I don’t understand why you would protect me.”

“You are mine, Nova.” Calix stated bluntly. “You are mine to protect.”

A thought sprouted in my mind and I couldn’t keep myself from whispering. “Am I yours to hurt, Calix?”

His eyes darkened a fraction and my heart raced. He opened his mouth to speak and everything inside of me tensed. “Get beneath the covers, Nova.”

“Answer my question.” I demanded, folding my knees into my chest.

“You are mine to command.” He growled in warning. “Now, get beneath the covers.”

I didn’t move. I was frozen. I remained sitting on the side of the bed closest to the door, hugging my knees like a frightened child. I felt like a frightened child - so helpless. I just couldn’t move.

Calix popped the button open on his jeans before raising a brow at me. “Are you going to get under the blankets, or am I going to have to put you there?”

“No,” I whispered. “Don’t touch me.”

“Then do as I ask.” He barked in low tones. His eyes were sharp as they watched me unfold my legs from my chest.

I scooted back up onto the pillows at the head of the bed before inching my toes between the sheets. They were crisp and clean. They felt amazing on my tired flesh, but I was still too nervous to really appreciate their cool weight.

“Now, come to your side of the bed.” Calix pointed down to the side of the bed he’d first thrown me onto and slowly, I inched closer to him. I wished he’d move to his own side. I didn’t want him standing so close to me.

“I don’t want to share the bed with you.” I murmured, watching the muscle in his cheek twitch at my words.

“You have no choice.” His hands went back to his jeans. I heard the zipper slide down and I slammed my eyes shut. I wasn’t so much of a prude that I hadn’t seen a penis before. I’d caught glimpses on late night television, but I hadn’t gone so far as to see one in person.

Call me old fashioned, but I’d always wanted to be married before I gave into sex. It was why I barely bothered dating throughout high school or the two years I’d taken between high school and the start of college.

And then I had the snarky thought,
I guess you’ve got what you always wanted - your husband will be your first.

The thought made me flinch inside. Calix would be my first - if I didn’t get away from him. I had to get away from him. I had to escape.

I would find a way.

I heard a faint click and I sensed that Calix had turned on the lamp sitting on my nightstand. “You can open your eyes, Nova. I’m not naked.”

“I’m tired.” I replied. I heard him walk around the bed to his own side before I rolled onto my side and faced the patio - away from him. Curling my knees into my chest, I hugged them tight. I’d never been one to sleep in the fetal position, but I just felt so vulnerable. This position gave me a sense of comfort, and even though I knew it was false, it was something.

“Turn off your light.” Calix commanded. I felt the bed shift with his weight and thanked the heavens it was so large. There was no reason Calix should have to touch me throughout the night in this bed. We both had plenty of room to remain on our own sides.

Reaching out from beneath the covers, I flicked off the lamp. Darkness swelled in the room before my eyes adjusted and the moonlight spilled a soft white glow over the floor. As I lay on my side, staring out through the open patio doors I felt the same kind of sadness fill my heart as I had earlier. I ached for home. I ached for my family.

Apart from a two week exchange I’d done through the school for my French class, I hadn’t ever been away from my family. I was a homebody and I liked it that way. I
needed
home.

Calix shifted in the bed and I wondered what he was doing. He hadn’t yet lain down and with every passing moment, I was growing increasingly uncomfortable within his presence. Did he plan to sit and watch me sleep all night?