Hanging by a Moment (From this Moment Book 1) (20 page)

Without wasting any time he slides inside of my throbbing flesh as his hot mouth goes to suck on my nipple pulling the hard bud between his teeth creating hot spasms throughout my inflamed body.

I whimper.

Driving into me he groans as I grip his tight solid ass trying to get him closer to me. He moves his mouth to my other nipple lavishing it with the same mind blowing treatment.

I wrap my legs around his waist feeling my thighs grow tense as I build up to my climax.

“Give it me, baby.” His hoarse voice is my undoing.

I am drowning in him as I pull his inky hair bringing his lips to mine, kissing him feverishly as I release an earth shattering orgasm. “Oh God!
Luke!
” I shout out. The words spill out of my mouth without me even realising it. “I love you. Oh God. Fuck!”
His body stills and his lips leave mine. Raising his head, his blue eyes are twinkling as he looks at me.

A sexy heart stopping grin forms on his lips. “I must be pretty good. I got you to declare your love for me.” He has a very pleased expression on his face as he teases me. Like he has been waiting for this moment forever.
He probably has,
my subconscious reminds me.

“I love you so much.” I reach up to kiss him.

Breaking the kiss his expression turns serious. His voice is sober as he speaks and there is a very satisfied content look in his beautiful blue eyes. “I love you too... so fucking much it hurts.” He doesn’t wait for me to answer, his lips seal over mine in a hungry passionate kiss driving me wild.

He thrusts into me once more before his body shudders in spasms. We ride out our storm together as we lay pressed to each other, holding on tight. I blink back the tears from my eyes as my fingers draw circles on his sweaty hot muscular back.

I sniff. I realise I just told him I love him. And it was the easiest thing to say. Because I really do love him with all of my heart. It makes no sense to me why I waited so long to tell him. I love him, forever. And that is all I want to think about. I refuse to let my thoughts wander to what will happen tomorrow or the day after. I push those thoughts to the back of my mind. This is what matters... right here, right now... the present. I don’t want those haunting memories of those that have left me to tarnish this wonderful moment. Feeling so loved and cherished all wrapped up in the arms of the man I love so desperately. I can’t and won’t think of anything else. And I refuse to think that he will leave me. I just want to savour the moment and the incredible look in his eyes when I said those magical words. How his blue eyes twinkled with adoration when he looked at me. His beautiful face looked so happy. Content. I mentally pray to God that this relationship will last because I don’t think I can deal with another person I love leaving me. Luke means the world to me. He is my world.

Raising himself up on his forearms, he gazes into my wet eyes, his expression confused. “Those better be happy tears because you’ve made me the happiest man on earth.”

Not trusting my voice, I nod smiling.

“Good.” His face relaxes and he tightens his hold over me.

Chapter Nineteen

“I-I’m... g-giving up.” I huff out glancing over at Brit who looks equally exhausted as me. I come to a dead stop breathing in heavily. My lungs are burning and I feel like I’ve been punched a few times in the gut. Even Snow Patrol can’t give me the strength I need to run another two more steps.

Bending over in front of me to grab my knees, I wait for my breath to catch up with me. Beads of sweat are trickling down my bright pink and black striped racer back top and inside my black running shorts. I can’t even remember why I put myself through this torture.
Crazy!

“Whose... insane idea... was it to go... further?” Brit pants as she stops next to me mimicking my actions. Her beautiful face is marred by her frown. She looks like she wants to kill me. She probably would if she had the strength.

“I expect you to talk me out of insane ideas, not agree with me.” I point an accusing finger in her direction.

She looks at me narrowing her blue eyes. “Well, I’m going to Starbucks to enjoy an extra large choc milkshake with a chewy chocolate cookie. I damn well earned it. Then I’m catching a cab back to the dorm.” She moans as she bends down reaching for her toes to stretch out her leg muscles.

“Sounds like a plan, Dan.” I bend my legs back grabbing my ankle to hold it against the back of my thigh.

For some insane reason I decided to run an extra half mile today hoping it will help ease part of my stress. My nerves are a complete-tangled-up-short-circuiting mess. I am meeting up with my parents tomorrow. They flew into New York a day earlier than expected and called me last night after Luke walked me back to my room. We are meeting up for dinner tomorrow night. And thank fuck they have not mentioned Ethan again... much to my relief.

I take a sip of my iced vanilla latte. This is my second best thing in the entire world. Catch up with my best friend while indulging in the food of angels. I am sitting in Starbucks with Brit enjoying every scrumptious bite of my decadent chocolate caramel muffin. My best thing in the entire world is spending time with Luke... getting tangled around his hot hard body. I smile to myself.

“What’s that goofy grin for?” Brit asks as she licks the melted chocolate from her thumb.

I smile shyly at her. I need to fill her in on my recent chat with Luke. “I told Luke I love him.” I blurt out.

“I knew it!” She exclaims excitedly thumping the wooden table with her hand sending small pieces of her cookie crumbs flying from her delicate fingers.

I laugh at her. She definitely picked up that strange un-lady like gesture from Travis.

My bestie is over the moon when she finds out Luke and I have finally declared our love for each other. I leave out the details about his playboy ways knowing for sure that it is not something he wants everyone to know since he left Manhattan looking for a fresh start here.

“I know you better than you know yourself. And you fell for him the day we went out to Reds right?” Her stunning excited face is lit up like a child on Christmas morning.

I inwardly cringe. I know she and Jane will never let me hear the end of it when they find out I fell for Luke the very first time I saw him in the cafeteria. “Actually, I fell for him that very first day I saw him in the cafeteria.” I smirk. My cheeks are hot and I know they are the colour of tomatoes.

“
No fucking way!
You acted so cool with Jane and me.” She jabs her slim finger in my arm.

“I had to. You guys were all over yourselves trying to shove him down my throat. There was no need to encourage your good deeds.” I chuckle, swallowing another piece of muffin.

“So what was it that made you fall for him?”

“Love at first sight. I don’t know. But I was hooked.” I shrug at her.

“Shit, Em! You didn’t even fall for Ethan that fast.”

I cringe at the sound of my ex’s name. A few weeks ago I would have done anything to have him back in my life. Now I don’t even want to hear his name. And it has nothing to do with any feelings I might still have for him. Because the only feelings I do have for him are gratitude. If he hadn’t left, Luke and I would not be together. So I owe Ethan big time for leaving me when he did. Jane was so wrong about not forgetting your first love. Ethan will always have that title but his memory has definitely slipped from my mind. My mind that is consumed with thoughts of Luke... very naughty thoughts.

“There is something about him. And I saw it there in his eyes that first day.” When he fixed his blue eyes on me and stared right into my soul like he was branding his claim on me. And it was there again when Travis introduced us. I remember the tingles that rippled through my body. And I could not get him off my mind, even though he insulted me. Not that I wanted to. That was when I knew there was something there.

Ping! My mobile alerts me to a text.

Love you... forever. Lx

I wonder if his ears were burning because he could sense Brit and me talking about him. I am unable to wipe my stupid grin off my face. I text him back.

Love you more... now and forever. x

A picture of Luke and I dancing at The Greyson Hotel appears on my screen as Hanging by a Moment starts playing. It takes me a second to realise my mobile is ringing. I see Luke’s name on the screen. I frown wondering when he did that.

“What is Lifehouse doing hiding under the table?” Brit teases.

I answer as Brit throws her napkin at me winking.

“Hi.” I answer.

“Hey, princess. Just wanted to hear you tell me how much you love me.”

“I love you to the moon and back.” I giggle.

“Before I forget we are having a triple date tonight with Brad and Jane.” I hear Travis’s voice mumble something in the background. “Trav said to let Brit know. Got to go, before coach has a stroke. Love you forever. Later, baby.”

“Love you too.”

We hang up.

“What did lover boy want?’ Brit purrs at me.

“Just wanted to tell me he loves me.” I purr back at her.

“I am so happy for you, chickie. For both of you.” She smiles whole heartedly at me as she plops another piece of her chewy chocolate cookie into her mouth.

I let Brit know about our dinner plans before we make our way outside to catch a cab back to campus. There is no way either one of us are running back.

****

Brit, Travis, Luke and I ride together in Luke’s car and meet up with Brad and Jane at The Grill.  Already seated in the middle of a corner booth, we make our way across to them and slide into the dark brown leather seats. Luke slides in after me and casually drapes his arm around my shoulders.

As soon as we are all seated, a busty young blonde waitress makes her way over to us to take our order.

“And what’ll you guys be having today?” She drawls in her Southern accent as she flutters her eyelashes caked in way too much mascara at Luke. I mentally throw up all over her tight little white tank top that is clearly three sizes too small for her. I am sure she stole the damn thing from her ten year old sister.

Luke keeps his blue eyes fixed on mine as he gives her his drink order including mine totally ignoring the flirtatious moves of her hips clad in black skinny jeans.

I want to bitch slap the cheap slut instead I clench my hands into tight fists on the wood table. Jealousy is coursing through my blood and I feel the need to hit something. I have never been jealous before not even with Ethan. But just having this woman look at Luke has me wishing I had a steak knife in my hand.

After she sashays away he picks up my hand that is lying on the table and lifts it to his warm lips. He places a gentle kiss on my knuckles. “Calm down. I love you. Forever.”

I’m embarrassed that he noticed my obvious reaction to the waitress and he wants to reassure me. And I know he means it when he says he loves me.

“I am calm.” I grunt.

After placing Luke’s and my drinks on the table cheap slut waitress - clearly annoyed with Luke’s lack of interest in her - slides her ass over to Travis. She bends her slender hips to place his drinks on the table, giving him an eyeful of her ample cleavage.

I almost choke when Brit thumps her small fist hard on the table, shocking Miss Slut. She immediately straightens up and walks away.
Fuck! Really... how low will some girls go?

As soon as she leaves Brad gushes in mock joy. “Yes! She’s going to turn her attention to me next.”

Jane looks at him in mock horror. “I guess I will have to hide you under the table, babe.”

“Oh yes!” He screams in excitement. “And you can imagine the fun I will have under the table with you.”

The boys are high fiving each other when Miss Slut arrives with our meals. Licking her lips that are overdosed in gloss, she seductively places Brad’s plate of ribs in front of him.

Jane green eyes narrow at the blonde tramp. “Sorry honey, but this one,” her hand going around Brad’s big muscled arm, “is
also
spoken for.” She smiles cockily at the waitress.

Miss Slut’s face turns beet red and she leaves as soon as she sets all our food on the table.

For the rest of the evening the girls and I are amused with the excellent service Miss Cheap Slut provides us, clearly still trying to impress our guys. And not one of them gave her a second glance.

Chapter Twenty

I am so glad that I have an hour’s drive before I reach the hotel in Manhattan, giving me enough time to calm down the hot heavy feeling in my tummy. My parents have suggested that I meet them at the hotel for dinner, sending a town car to drive me over. They have not mentioned Ethan to me since that first email. And I have decided it is best to let them know that Ethan and I are no longer together when I catch up with them.

Smoothing the pale blue shift dress, I walk into the opulent restaurant where I am greeted by the hostess.

Before long, I’m being escorted to a table at the far corner of the large dining room where my parents are already seated.

As soon as my dad sees me approaching he rises from his seat. Wrapping his large warm hands around me, he draws me in for a tight hug before pecking me lightly on my cheek. “Darling, how are you?” He still looks the same. Hasn’t changed since the last time I saw him. That was eight months ago. His sandy blonde hair just showing a touch of gray at his temples and as usual he is impeccably dressed.

“Hi, dad. I’m good and how are you?”

“All the better for seeing you. You are looking stunning as always.”

Moving around him, to stand at his side, is my mother. She appears well and always stylishly dressed in the latest fashion - like she stepped out of a fashion magazine. This time in a cool mint green pants suit. Her pin straight dark brown hair is sitting on her small shoulders. Holding out her hands, she engulfs me in a warm hug.

“Emma, I’ve missed you.” She air kisses me, making sure not to get any lipstick residue on my cheeks.

“Mom, I’ve missed you too.”
Not true but why argue.

The waiter - who is standing patiently beside us, giving us a chance to finish our greeting - pulls out a dark blue winged back chair for me.  Sitting down, I thank him kindly before turning my attention back to my parents.

“So how are classes? Your final year?” Dad asks. He is dressed in a casual button down dress shirt and black pants. His jacket is neatly placed around the back of his chair.

I give them the rundown of my classes and subjects I’m studying.

“Have you applied for your internship, darling?” My mom’s crisp voice asks me.

“I will do so after mid terms.”

“All the luck with that.” Dad nods. “Any company will be lucky to have you on board.”

Our drinks arrive and I’m glad to sip on the chilled wine... just the thing I need to help me get through the evening. I’ve never been very close to my parents. They were never around enough for us to bond and sitting here is kind of awkward. However, I do love them... kind off... like how you love a distant aunt.

“Jack, Jenna, how are you?”

The voice comes from behind me. It sounds too cool and way too casual but very familiar... greeting my parents as if they are old friends going back a long way.

My spine prickles and my tummy turns as if I have just swallowed something rotten.
What the fuck? What is he doing here?

Startled by his voice, my mind is spinning out of control. He comes to stand at my side. My shocked gray eyes lock on the source of that voice and my worst suspicion is confirmed.
Fucking hell!
This cannot be happening. I am waiting for my alarm to go off so I can wake from this nightmare.

A few seconds must have passed but it feels like a couple of hours as everything passes in slow motion. Like a movie that I am watching. I watch as he shakes hands with both my parents who are all smiles at seeing him. My mom hugs him.
What?!

Seconds later, he pulls out the chair next to me and sits down comfortably. And it is only when he sits down that I realise the table has been set for four people... not three.

Anger starts to brew deep inside of me.

Turning to focus his attention on me, he speaks in that sweet familiar voice. The one that used to once upon a time send delicious shivers through me. “Sweetheart, how are you?” He places a gentle kiss on my stiff cheek.

“Ethan.” I manage to breathe out. “What are you doing here?” My voice sounds foreign to me as I try to register what the hell has happened.

What is he doing here? He is supposed to be in Switzerland, living with his parents and having dinner with his new girlfriend. The one he so recently told me about... in a letter. Not here sitting next to me, with my parents, acting like he never left. Apart from that one letter he sent me, we have not been in contact. And how is it that he seems to know my parents so well? Maybe I am going insane and imagining this whole scenario before me. Yeah, that has got to be it.

I stare at the face I once considered the most handsome I’ve ever had the pleasure to lay my eyes on. Blinking, I feel like I have entered into a parallel universe, one that I want to escape from. Now.

Ethan picks up my hand that is lying frozen on the table, softly kissing my knuckles, looking intensely into my shocked eyes. Like everything is fucking perfect in the world. Is he pretending that we are still a couple to fool my parents? Like as if I am might be afraid to tell them the truth. What is his story? Does he seriously think we can pull off this act of still being together in front of my parents?

He knows I have never been close to my parents and their opinion is the least of my concern. I know I should yank my hand away from his solid grip but my body has turned to Jell-O. It is refusing to cooperate... I am a stupid pile of human flesh and bone. And because of this he is taking full advantage of the situation. I need to set my parents and Ethan straight.

Smiling at me he speaks, his voice as gentle as I remember. “I’m back. For you.”

My head buzzes as I process his words. My subconscious is trying to kick start me out of my shock.

Ethan smiles his cocky grin.

I hear my mom speak, her voice breaking the awkward silence that has crept in. I blink as I shift my shell shocked gaze from Ethan to look at her look.

“We had a stopover in Switzerland and we ran into Ethan at the airport. He was on his way back to New York.” Her gray eyes widen at me as if I should be happy with her explanation. “When he told us what happened between the two of you, your dad and I were obviously upset. He explained all is well with his parents. They just needed some family time together. And now that they have worked everything out he felt ready to come back. I know darling, you’re excited about Ethan’s return to Midland Falls as much as we are.”

Remind me once again how Ethan’s return affects you?

I am utterly stunned. Reality hits me between my eyebrows as I figure it all out. Ethan is not putting up an act; he is trying to win me back. And he has my parents assisting him. They planned this right from the start... to get Ethan and I back together. Blood starts to rush through my veins as my body kick starts itself... as if jolted by an electrical shock. And I recover from my earlier malfunction. Feelings return to my previously numb body and I yank my hand out of Ethan’s tight grasp.

With my shaky fingers I reach out for my glass of wine and tip it to my lips, draining the cool liquid in one massive gulp.

As I recover, I turn to look at Ethan, then my mother and lastly at my father - noticing the pleased content look on all their faces. My temper flares as I speak, spilling out of me uncontrollably like a car that has lost the function of its braking system.

“Did any of you stop to think about what I want?” I shout at them, my voice laced with anger. I have never raised my voice to my parents before. I have always just kept quiet every time they left me – their young child – to travel. I have always kept quiet. Even when they forced me to go to boarding school. When they missed my birthdays and PTA meetings. My first school play... when all the other parents where there cheering their kids on, I had to rely on Brit’s parents to cheer me on. My mom was never there to hear about my first crush or to help me pick out a dress for my prom. They were never there. And now they feel the need to butt into my life. No fucking way!

“You,” I say pointing my index finger at Ethan, “and I broke up.” I shift my cold eyes towards my parents. “And you should not meddle in my life.”

My mom looks at me shocked. “We were only trying to help.” She tells me, her voice calm.

“Well, you’re not!” I bite back at her. I push my chair back and stand.

Ethan tries to grab my hand but I move it away before he does. “Em, the only reason we broke up was because I
had
to leave. Not because we stopped loving each other.” His brown eyes are wide with fear.

As if that makes it alright!
I want to scream. You did not fight for us before so why the hell now? “Wrong! It has been more than six months. And I’ve gotten over you!” I shake my head.

Spinning on my heels I walk away, out of the restaurant and into the hallway away from all this craziness. Since when did my parents interfere in my life? I was the lucky one… the one whose parents kept their nose out of my business. I never had to put up with them telling me what to do. Not even once… excluding sending me to boarding school. I mean really? They just rock up all of a sudden and are shoving Ethan done my throat. Who the fuck do they think they are? My head hurts and I’ve never been this angry in my entire life.

A warm hand grips me around my waist making me spin around to face its owner.

“I get that you’re angry with me. And you have every right to be. But don’t deny our love.” Ethan is standing a few feet from me. His expression is one of total disbelief, like he cannot seem to figure out how I managed to get over him.

I try to unsuccessfully free myself from his grip but he just tightens his hold on me.

“You denied our love the minute you decided it was not worth fighting for! It has been over six months, Ethan.” I glower at his face. “I. Got. Over. You.” I say through clenched teeth.

His one hand goes to my lower back and he pulls me towards him so our bodies are touching. His warm breath falls on my face. I can feel the heat radiating off from his body. Once upon a time, I would have melted when he touched me like this. Now it has no effect on me. “Our love will
never
die.” His soft lips come down hard on mine as he kisses me.

My hands fly up to his black suit jacket and I try to shove him off me. My lips are tightly sealed together, preventing him from slipping his tongue into my mouth. And I twist and turn as I try to break free of his grasp on me.

He gives up and releases my lips. His face is blank and his eyes are dark, almost black. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” He shouts at me angrily.

Are you serious?
After practically mauling me, he asks me what is wrong. “Get your fucking hands off me!”

Immediately his hands fall from my waist, releasing me. I breathe a sigh of relief.

I step back from him and cross my arms over my chest. I cannot believe him. This is not the kind gentle Ethan I knew. This person in front of me is a total stranger. “You thought everything’s going to be just the way it was, the minute you walked back into my life. Ethan, grow the fuck up! Life moves on... I’ve moved on.”

He rakes his hand through his dark blonde hair in frustration. “You’re angry. I get that. I’ll give you time to get over it.” He points his finger in my face as he steps backwards. “But I’m not giving you time to forget our love.”  Turning around, he walks back inside the restaurant.

My heart is beating wildly out of control, just like my life feels it is unravelling before my eyes. I wonder if the Universe is playing games with me.
Not again!
My feet gather momentum as I walk away breaking out into a run as I head towards the foyer and through the tall glass doors that the doorman has opened for me. I continue running until I step outside the hotel into the cool dark night.

A cab pulls up in front of the hotel and a young lady jumps out. I quickly jump inside the car asking the driver to take me back to MFU. Away from here.

Once settled inside the cab, I start to shiver even though it is a warm evening. The last few minutes... the unwelcome intrusion in my life has taken a toll on me. I cannot believe that Ethan is back. Back to claim me.
Fat chance in hell!

I had no desire for him to return. He made his choice when he decided to leave for Switzerland. I got over him when I realised he was not going to fight for our relationship. And now I have Luke in my life. My heart belongs to him... forever.

Oh God, Luke! What do I tell him?
I love him so much and I’m not prepared to lose him. Not ever. I look out the window, watching the dark scenery go by, taking me further away from all that went down tonight. And my parents… how could they do that to me? They did not have the decency to tell me about meeting up with Ethan at the airport. And the fact that they knew we broke up. They could have asked me what happened. But no, they just took Ethan’s word for it. Not that he lied to them. He was honest when he said he left because his dad got a transfer to Switzerland. But still we ended our relationship months ago. Did they all just assume that little old me was sitting around lonely and moping about Ethan all this time? Praying that he would return. I groan.

The drive back to the dorm feels like an eternity, like I could have travelled the globe a few times. I make my way back to my room and silently open the door not wanting to disturb Brit if she is asleep. Slowly I slip inside the room. I almost jump out of my skin when I hear her voice. “Hey, you back so soon. How did it go?”