Heart Ache (Bound by a Touch Novels #1) (5 page)

“
Not real.”

“
This can be reality.” And he wanted this reality with her, every night for the rest of forever. But the choice needed to be hers. “Come to me, Gabrielle. There is nothing I want more than for you to come to me.”

She mumbled something unintelligible and eased against his chest. And for the first time in over four-hundred years, Nikolai completely relaxed.

Chapter Four

Gabrielle buried her face into her pillow, tightening her fist around the fabric beneath her cheek. She filled her lungs with the delicious scent she recognized.

“
Nikolai,” she moaned.

The falling sensation stopped suddenly when her body fell into the mattress. She jolted to awareness, disoriented and completely confused.

“
What the hell?”

She pushed herself up and looked around the room. Everything was exactly as it had been when she’d climbed into bed, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was … off. She stretched her arms over her head, feeling completely revived, like she’d slept for days instead of hours. All of the muscles that had been ready to snap last night were loose. Yet her entire body was buzzing, like a beehive had taken up residence just below her skin.

She rubbed her hands up and down her forearms, which did nothing to alleviate the sensation. Maybe she should pop a few Benadryl before heading to the office. It would be just her luck to have an allergic reaction to the oil used in her massage. She rolled her eyes and flopped back onto the pillows. The smell that enveloped her made her heart skip a beat.

Nikolai.

And why the hell wasn’t she calling him Niko?

She hopped up on her knees, frantically pulling the bedding to her nose. The comforter, sheets, blankets, pillows; they
all
smelled like him. She tipped her head to the side and inhaled a lock of her hair. Damn, even
she
smelled like him.

This was one hell of a hangover. Too bad she hadn’t drunk anything. She frowned. Her mind raced, replaying everything she could remember about the last—she glanced at the clock—
eight hours!
She’d slept for eight hours?
Normally she couldn’t keep her eyes closed for six.

Maybe she was coming down the flu. Slapping a hand over her forehead, she felt for a fever. No. She cleared her throat. Not even a tickle.

So what was wrong with her?

Her dreams from the night before flooded her memory. She’d dreamt of Niko. But that wasn’t exactly out of the norm, he starred in her erotic dreams every night.

There was one difference.

Last night’s dreams weren’t erotic. They were sweet. They were comforting. They were everything she’d expect him to be. He’d held her, ran his fingers through her hair, spoke softly, and asked her to call him Nikolai.

She giggled nervously, twisting a lock of hair around her finger. Well, that explained the name change.

“
Nikolai.” A smile spread to her lips.

“
Nikolai.” The word flowed over her tongue like sweet, melted chocolate.

“
Nikolai.” Her insides bubbled with the excitement she always felt when he touched her.

With his name on her lips and the rest of him in her thoughts, Gabrielle glided into the bathroom, oblivious to everything but the cloud she floated on. Her reflection was of a dreamy-eyed girl, grinning like a fool.

“
Oh, good hell!” She slapped a palm against her cheek. “Get a grip, Gabby.”

She reached into the shower to turn on the water. The forward motion brought her hair down around her face and with it came the scent that just had to be her overactive imagination. Her hand gathered the auburn strands, pulling them to her nose.

Crazy or not, she smelled Nikolai.

She reached in to turn off the water. There would be no shower this morning because the thought of washing her delusions down the drain caused an actual physical pain in her chest. His scent was a comfort, as if filling an emptiness she didn’t realize she had.

A shake of her head and a sigh to clear her lungs, and she was ready to admit she was nuts. Certifiable. Get out the straight-jacket and the rubber room. Bat shit crazy!

There was no way Nikolai had been here. She’d have known if the man of her dreams was, in fact, reality. Wouldn’t she?

Nikolai vaporized into his bedroom and panted like he’d run across the entire country. He bent at the waist, resting his hands on his thighs and sucked in breath after breath.

“
That was close!”

He’d been so comfortable with Gabrielle sleeping in his arms, he’d actually fallen asleep, too. It wasn’t until she’d started stirring and said his name that he’d realized his mistake.

He hated leaving the way he did, evaporating right out from under her was the coward’s way. But it wasn’t as though he’d really had a choice.

His toes wiggled freely which drew his attention.

“
Dammit!”

Hopefully she wouldn’t find his shoes. There wasn’t an explanation that would make sense—except the truth. And the truth was out of the question.

He sucked in a deep breath, held it in his lungs for a moment, released it, and made his decision. The shoes needed to be retrieved—sooner rather than later. His eyes closed, picturing where he wanted to vaporize.

In the next second, Nikolai stood on Gabrielle’s balcony. Through the window he could see her sitting at the table, drinking a cup of coffee with her nose buried in the morning paper.

A momentary pang of disappointment surged through him as he noticed she’d already dressed for work. She always sported conservative office attire, but from the short stint in her closet he knew she had a wild side. There was more to his Gabrielle than pencil skirts, twill slacks, and professional blouses.

He forced his mind back on task and quickly changed his plan. He vaporized directly into her bedroom, fetched his size thirteen Lugz safely hidden under her bed.

Knowing he should leave didn’t make him do so.

The morning crew at KHB droned on with the news. A flutter of paper signaled the turning of a page. She giggled softly at something and Niko wanted to be the one making her smile. He wanted to be her everything.

Knowing she sat only a few inches of drywall away, yet totally out of reach was painful. It would be easy to appear at her front door. He could knock and ask to join her for coffee. Or offer to give her a ride to work. Or push her against the wall and kiss her until they were both crazed.

A shake of his head dismissed his asinine thoughts. If he didn’t get out of here, he was going to do something he wouldn’t be able to take back.

Closing his eyes, he willed his body to evaporate out of her presence and back into the lonely room that was his and his alone. He never brought a female to the place where he actually slept. There was another master suite down the hall he used for the rare occasion a female accompanied him home. The
very
rare occasion.

He hadn’t so much as touched a female since the moment he’d shaken Gabrielle’s hand. He hadn’t wanted to. From her very first touch, she held every part of him in her delicate hands.

His vampiric speed made his morning routine a quick one and he was ready in no time. He straightened his tie, trying to ignore the empty ache in his chest. Niko closed his eyes and stretched his senses to make sure it was safe, then focused on his destination.

The quiet, dark stillness of his office cloned that of his mood. Gabby hadn’t arrived yet. A smile spread to his lips. He loved when he was able to surprise her by getting to work first.

This morning, though, his anxiety outweighed his smugness. He sighed and sat down behind his desk where he waited—and waited—with his fingers entwined, resting on the blotter, and his legs crossed at the ankles. He’d tried pacing, but it only added to the nervous energy currently driving him to the verge of madness.

Every inch of him knew the moment Gabrielle entered the outer office. Not only did his heart start beating and the ache in his chest disappear, but her scent entered with her, causing his nose to flare and his every muscle to go taut in anticipation.

He tried to stay sitting behind the large desk, but having an obstacle between him and his female was more than he could handle. The battle was lost and Nikolai knew it. To his surprise, he didn’t care. His feelings for her started with a single touch three years ago and had grown into love. He waited for a few minutes, listening as she turned on her computer and stowed her things in her desk.

When she flipped on the small radio on her desk, he cursed. Well, hell. If she wasn’t going to come to him, he would have to close the gap between them—emotionally and physically.

He raked his fingers through his hair, pulling slightly in frustration. Despite his every effort to stay in his chair, he stood, then strode to the door with confidence he didn’t feel. His hand wrapped around the handle but he paused to take a breath.

What if she was avoiding him? What if everything that happened last night had freaked her out? What if…?

The door opened only to stop as it whacked into him; his head and chest absorbing most of the impact. His eyes watered and his nose ran. He sniffed and blinked, trying to see Gabrielle clearly.

“
Oh!” She peeked through the opening in the doorway. “I’m so sorry, Niko. Are you okay?”

She opened the door when it was safe and reached out toward him. Before contact was made she paused. Time stood still in that moment. Her hand shook where it suspended between them, and when she pulled back, Nikolai felt the retreat in his soul.

“
I didn’t realize you were here already.” A quick evaluation of the office—and the lack of illumination—had her looking directly into his eyes. “Do you have a headache?”

He rubbed at his temples. “Now that you mention it—”

“
Can I get you some Tylenol?”

“
No, Gabrielle,” he purred her name. “Tylenol can’t fix the ache I’m feeling.”

“
Oh.” Her forehead wrinkled into the cutest look of confusion. “Is there anything I can get you that will?”

Your love. Your heart. You.

It wasn’t like he could make that kind of declaration. She’d probably go running for the hills.

“
No. It will pass.”
Someday.
He rubbed absently at his chest where the real ache existed.

“
Niko.” Her delicate hand curled timidly around his forearm, squeezing gently.

Fire burned from the point of contact, spreading until his entire body was aflame from her simple touch. His eyes drifted closed and he concentrated on nothing except Gabby’s warm hand on his arm.

She pulled back and he felt a chill rivaling an arctic blast. “About yesterday…” Her eyes met his, holding his gaze for a long moment before she shook her head. “I’ll be at my desk if you need anything.”

That wasn’t what she’d meant to say, he was sure of it. But when the door closed, so had the opportunity to ask her to tell him what was really on her mind.

Hours later Nikolai stood behind Gabrielle; one hand on her desk and the other on the back of her chair. Her body was well aware of the closeness, the brief contact of his chest brushing her shoulder. Her hands shook as she tried to notate the changes that needed to be made to the report they were discussing. Or rather the report he was looking at. She wasn’t able to think of anything except how damn close he was and every cell in her body demanded she touch him, to be touched by him.

“
Gabrielle?”

She tipped her head toward him and gasped when she realized a slight lift of her chin would bring them lip to lip.

“
Huh?” she asked in a pathetic, dreamy whisper.

His eyes twinkled and a wide smile spread to his perfect lips. “I said … we need to get the report over to Vincent as soon as possible.”

“
Of course, Nikolai.”

He tensed and she felt his sharp intake of breath suck past her cheek. She stiffened and cringed, wishing like hell there was a way to go back and redo the last five minutes. Where were Wayne and Garth when you needed them?

“
I’m sorry. I—”

His hand moved in slow caresses over her back and his lips were suddenly right at her ear.

“
Please Gabrielle,” he purred, his accent uncharacteristically prominent, and oh, so very sexy, “call me Nikolai.”

Those words.

She blinked. Her mind raced along with her heart. This wasn’t the first time he’d spoken those words. But when…

“
Wh- what?” She turned to watch him carefully, looking for answers to the how’s and why’s of that phrase from his kissable lips.

He took a step back as if anticipating her action as she stood. The heart-stopping smile was back.

“
What?” His innocent act only heightened her suspicions and made him utterly adorable.

She took a step toward him, leaving nothing but air between them. “What did you just say to me?”