Hide And Keep (5 page)

Chapter 5

Maybe I could get a place. I forgot how good it feels to sleep in a bed,
Aiden thought as he ripped the tags off a t-shirt and pulled it over his head.
After it's over. If it ever ends,
he frowned as he pulled a pair of jeans on. After three years, he was exhausted with it. His thoughts had been dark lately. His mind would drift and he’d imagine giving up and coming out into the open, letting it happen. But the bed felt good. Having that every night could be worth holding on for.

Coming downstairs after he woke up had been almost heaven. If Cabbot hadn’t been there, it would have been perfect. Aiden had never had a morning after. No one had ever made him breakfast. And it was pancakes. He could live for pancakes alone. Aiden said the character was Mr. Morning After. That was a lie. In his head, Aiden was pretending he was Mr. Every Morning. He pretended he knew the body he’d put his arms around as well as his own, that this Sunday had been one of many with pancakes and shower sex. But Aiden knew better than to imagine he’d ever really be Mr. Every Morning. Men like Lane didn’t stay with men like Aiden. A man like Lane might make Aiden pancakes once or twice to save him from a few fast food meals but Aiden wasn’t the type that got long term pancakes.

But Cabbot didn’t deserve long term pancakes either. The idea of Lane with Cabbot made Aiden’s chest tight and he felt like dark heavy slow colors. He didn't understand it. Aiden had never given any thought to who his past partners slept with, before or after him. It had always been about that moment, the brief time they were together. There was never a before. There was never an after. Aiden hated that Cabbot had touched Lane. He was arrogant and thought he was better than Lane. Cabbot wanted to keep Lane on the side, always waiting for him. Lane deserved someone special that was worth long term pancakes. Even worse, Aiden could tell that Cabbot was lousy in bed. Lane didn’t like having sex with Cabbot. Aiden didn’t understand why Lane had settled but he shouldn't have.

Aiden had never been aggressive. He had never pursued anyone. His partners tended to seek him out or it was a simple matter of mutual convenience. After meeting Cabbot, Aiden was determined to have Lane. He’d wanted Lane as soon as he saw him in the terminal and his desire grew more intense with each moment they spent together. Aiden couldn’t accept that Cabbot could have Lane but he couldn’t. And Lane could use a few nights with someone that knew how worship his body and turn it inside out. Aiden might not understand the dynamics of interpersonal communication but he understood how sex and the body worked. Aiden was going to introduce Lane to Mr. Make-His-Toes-Curl-And-Set-His-Hair-On-Fire.

There was the sound of the shower across the hall. Aiden smiled and his body became taut with arousal and anticipation. Aiden knew he’d get his shower sex before he left. Lane had wanted it as much as he did. Even Aiden could see it in Lane's eyes. The phone buzzed as Aiden was sliding it into his pocket. He froze. His throat tightened and his heart started to beat faster as his body became cold and dark.
Don’t. Not now,
Aiden urged. He took a deep breath and shook his head. He wasn’t going to look. The message could wait. Fear and anger could wait. Right now, Aiden had something better to focus on. He was going to enjoy the lust and adrenaline of a new lover. He was going to get through Lane’s resistance. And then, Aiden was going to lose himself in Lane for as long as he could.

“What can I make you that you’ll eat?” Lane asked and Aiden looked up from his phone.

Aiden had spent the afternoon going over the crime scene photos from Cabbot’s case and reading statements from his phone. Lane read for a little while and watched a football game. Aiden was surprised when Lane let him eat the rest of the pancakes for lunch. It was turning out to be one of the best days Aiden had in as long as he could remember. Aiden’s lips twisted as he tried to think of what he’d liked to eat. His mother was the last person to cook for him and she had died six years ago. There was a memory followed by a terrible longing. Aiden was afraid to ask, if Lane didn’t have the ingredients, it would be disappointing. Aiden must have frowned or made another gesture that gave him away.

“What?” Lane asked. Aiden looked up at Lane.

“Can you make a grilled cheese?” He asked cautiously and held his breath as Lane’s head pulled back in surprise.

“A grilled cheese?” Lane repeated slowly and Aiden nodded.

“Yes. With apple slices or grapes and plain, sliced cucumbers.” Aiden became very still as he waited. Lane nodded and Aiden almost cried.

“A grilled cheese it is. With apple slices
and
grapes and plain, sliced cucumbers.” He announced as he went into the kitchen. Aiden felt warm bright colors burst within him and he had to clench his hands at his sides to keep from jumping up and laughing. Another memory.

“But just orange cheese. I don’t like white cheese.” Aiden called and Lane laughed from inside the fridge.

“Cheddar. Got it.” He replied.

Fifteen minutes later, Aiden had to blink back tears as he stared at two grilled cheese sandwiches, apples, grapes and cucumbers. It was perfect. He hooked his feet around the chair legs, straightened his back and locked his shoulders to keep from rocking as he started to eat. Aiden ate his sandwiches quickly then the cucumbers. He ate his apples and looked up at Lane as he popped the last grape into his mouth and found him watching. Aiden raised a brow in question and Lane smiled as he leaned back in his seat.

“You eat like a toddler.” He said and Aiden frowned as he tried to understand.

“I don’t think that’s accurate. I am much neater than a toddler when I eat. Also, I have significantly more teeth, so I can cope with more larger, solid foods.” He argued and Lane laughed.

“I’m sorry, you have the diet of a toddler, Aiden.” Lane amended. Aiden’s eyes flicked toward the ceiling as he considered and he nodded.

“Possibly. But I don’t like bananas.” He admitted and Lane laughed again as he took their plates to the kitchen.

“You know, you’re kind of adorable once you get used to the lack of filter, Aiden.” Lane said as he started loading the dishwasher. Aiden narrowed his eyes as he stared at Lane and tried to decide if it was a sincere compliment. He had a feeling it was and it made him warm.
Time to show him you’re a man,
Aiden decided as he stood up.

“I’d like to make you something. How about a cocktail?” Aiden asked as he walked toward the bar in the living room.

“I thought you didn’t drink.” Lane called from the sink. Aiden nodded as he took stock of the liquor and mixers.

“I don’t but my parents used to host parties and I would bartend. I’ve memorized at least a hundred drinks.” Aiden said as he went to the kitchen. “I need ice.” He announced as he pulled the freezer open. “What would you like?” Aiden asked as he shut the door and leaned against it. Lane shrugged.

“Surprise me.” He said with a wink. Aiden let his lips tilt in an easy grin and made his eyes look drowsy.

“I intend to.” He said softly as he slowly brushed past Lane. He let his hand drag across Lane’s lower back slowly and he smiled when Lane stiffened and held his breath.

Aiden made an old fashioned with orange bitters and set it on the coffee table as he waited for Lane to join him. Lane looked wary when he settled on the sofa next to Aiden and reached for his drink. He took a cautious sip and smiled as he swallowed.

“That’s delightful.” He sighed as he reclined. Aiden nodded as his arm extended along the back of the sofa and let his hand rest behind Lane’s shoulders.

“Why Cabbot?” Aiden asked as he traced Lane’s shoulder lightly with his middle finger. Lane frowned.

“Do we have to talk about my sex life?” He asked warily. Aiden’s head tilted.

“Why not?” Aiden countered and Lane sighed wearily.

“Because you just met the last two years. It’s not exactly something I’m really excited about or proud of.” He admitted. “Why don’t we talk about yours?” Lane looked at Aiden pointedly. Aiden shrugged.

“Fine. What do you want to know?” He asked and Lane looked surprised. Was he expecting Aiden to deflect? Lane leaned closer and Aiden started to stroke between his shoulder blades.

“Are you seeing anyone back home, in D.C.?” Lane asked. Aiden bit his lip as he considered.

“I spend more time away from D.C. than I do there. I’m not in a relationship with anyone but I do have someone that I have sex with regularly, when I’m in town.” He explained and Lane’s eyes narrowed as they searched Aiden’s.

“What’s his name?” Lane’s shoulders tightened. Aiden found that interesting.

“Paul Sloan.” Aiden said and they became tighter.

“Why aren’t you and Paul in a relationship?” Lane asked. It was Aiden’s turn to be surprised.

“Is that a real question, or a joke?” He asked and Lane frowned.

“Why would it be a joke?” His eyes were steady as they held Aiden’s.

“No one would want to be in a relationship with me.” Aiden stated. Lane’s mouth opened and closed several times before he shook his head.

“That’s stupid. Why wouldn’t someone want to be in a relationship with you?” He asked. Aiden laughed softly.

“Aside from the fact that I have no filter and eat like a toddler?” He gave back Lane’s pointed look. Lane rubbed the back of his neck as he cringed.

“Ok, but as far as faults go, those aren’t the worst. And you’re pretty upfront about your flaws. I can think of much worse.” Lane offered and took a long sip of his drink. Aiden stared out the window as he considered Lane’s point.

“I suppose but it’s never come to that with anyone. Definitely not with Paul. We’re sexually compatible but we have very little in common and have no desire to spend time with each other.” Aiden pictured Paul and reviewed everything he knew about him. “I don’t find him very interesting or enjoy talking to him. And I don’t think he really likes me. We respect each other professionally and the sex is enjoyable but that’s it.” Aiden admitted. “Also, I don’t want to be monogamous with Paul. I occasionally come across someone I’m attracted to when I’m traveling.” Aiden winked at Lane and his fingers trailed slowly up Lane’s neck and he shivered as he stared at Aiden.

“So, you’re kind of a slut?” Lane smiled and Aiden understood he was teasing.

“I don’t think so. Four partners in the last year doesn’t seem too unreasonable. And I’m always careful.” Aiden said and Lane nodded.

“No, that’s not as bad as I was expecting. And everything’s easy and everyone’s happy? No nightmares in your past?” Lane asked. Aiden felt a reflexive tightening in his chest as he pictured the text message he’d received that morning.

Unavailable

Enjoying Lake Cliff?

“Just one but I don’t want to ruin the mood.” He said as he let his fingernails scrape up and down the back of Lane’s neck. Lane sighed as he leaned closer. “Can we talk about Cabbot now?” Aiden asked. Lane frowned.

“Why are you so interested in Clark?” Lane asked as he searched Aiden’s eyes. Aiden held his gaze.

“It doesn’t make sense to me. I can’t understand what you saw in him or why you thought he was good enough for you.” Aiden said softly. Lane snorted as he raised his drink to his lips. He drained his glass and set it down before he got up and went to the window.

“I didn’t see anything in Clark. He was there and I knew it would never get complicated. I didn’t have time for feelings or obligations. We understood that we both had more important things in our lives and it was just sex, whenever it was convenient.” Lane pressed his arm against the glass and set his chin on it as he stared out. Aiden got up silently and crossed the room. Lane sighed as he rested his forehead against the glass. “I’ve been tired of it for a long time. But I didn’t have any other prospects and I don’t have time for the dating scene.” He mumbled.

Aiden stopped behind Lane and slid his hands up his back. He felt Lane tense for a moment before he sighed and relaxed. Aiden sent his hands around Lane’s waist and pushed them up his stomach. He felt the hard ridges of Lane’s stomach and firm, flat pecs beneath his t-shirt. Aiden angled his head as he leaned against Lane and bit his neck, dragging his teeth along Lane’s skin. Aiden knew Lane liked that and wasn’t surprised by the soft moan that slipped from Lane’s throat. It made Aiden feel hot and urgent, he pressed his body against Lane’s and ground his hips. Aiden felt Lane exhale, it was long and ragged and became fog on the glass in front of Lane’s face.

“What was that?” Aiden breathed into Lane’s ear.

Lane shook his head weakly and Aiden’s lips curved as his hands drifted down Lane’s body. He gently pressed them against Lane’s thighs and let them slide up. Aiden rubbed his lips against Lane’s ear and hummed softly as his hand brushed over Lane’s very large, very hard erection. Aiden could feel the heat of it through Lane’s jeans. His own cock pulsed urgently and Aiden rocked his hips, pressing it into the cleft of Lane’s ass. Lane hissed and arched against Aiden.

“This?” Aiden murmured as he ground against Lane again. Lane nodded drunkenly.

“It’s been a really long time.” Lane whispered hoarsely against the glass. That surprised Aiden. He leaned back and slid his hands over Lane’s ass.

“Cabbot didn’t…?” Aiden squeezed and his cock throbbed painfully at the feel of firm, round flesh filling his hands. Lane shook his head.

“Clark wouldn’t. He preferred fucking his wife.” Lane rasped. Aiden sucked his teeth as he traced the cleft of Lane’s ass through the thick fabric.

“I don’t know what he’s made of because your ass is killing me. You can’t imagine all the things I want to do to it.” Aiden grabbed Lane’s hips and started to rock against him, letting his erection grind between the hard globes of Lane’s ass.

“He never wanted to touch me there.” Lane breathed and Aiden shook his head in disbelief.

“I’m good, Lane. I can make you come so hard and in so many different ways… And when you let me, I’m going to fuck you so hard and so deep, I’m going to need a flashlight to find my way out.” Aiden whispered as he slid his hands under Lane’s shirt. Lane’s skin was hot and flickered under Aiden’s fingertips.