Highland Sparks: Logan and Gwyneth (Clan Grant Series Book 5) (16 page)

Logan did not budge. “Then do it,” he said to her. “I’ll hold him. Nock your arrow and kill him.”

A bolt of lightning arched through the sky, freezing her in her place, lighting up Logan and Erskine in the blue of the night. For the first time in her life, she saw a touch of fear in Duff’s eyes. She drew strength from Logan’s gaze and reset herself because she was still a good distance away, nocking another arrow and pulling back. Tears still mixed with raindrops, and she was about to let the arrow fly when a rumble of thunder startled her. She couldn’t do it.

She had sent countless arrows toward him and missed each time. And if she missed him this time? She could hit Logan—the man she…loved. It was not worth the risk.

She stood down, aiming her arrow at the ground, “Let him go.”

Logan said, “Shoot him. And if you don’t want to use your bow, come over and use my dagger.”

“Nay, I have to kill him the same way he killed my da and brother.” Gwyneth’s entire body shook, as the realization that she had failed her father drove right to her core. Sobs echoed through the storm as she stared at the sky, the rain washing her tears away as she willed a bolt of lightning to strike her down. “Nay. Let him go, Ramsay. I’m a failure.” Almost on key, the sky lit up as lightning struck a nearby tree, causing the ground to shake.

She fought to maintain her balance and covered her head while the roar of thunder echoed through the burgh. When she opened her eyes again, Erskine was gone.

***

Logan stood with the bastard in front of him, willing Gwyneth to shoot him, but she couldn’t. A painful wail rent through the air and he watched as the strong woman he loved fell apart in front of him. He had a difficult choice to make. Gwyneth was too torn up with memories to finish the job. Could he do it? Should he do it? He could end the scum’s life right now. One turn of his wrist and Erskine would take his last breath.

The haunted look in her gaze stopped him. If he did it for her, he would see that look in her eyes for the rest of their lives. Nay. A boom echoed as lightning struck nearby, shaking his grip. As if driven by an unknown force, he lowered the knife and shoved Erskine away from him. “Get your arse away from here. It won’t take much to change my mind.” Duff stalked off toward the water.

Gwyneth stood in the middle of the storm, utterly defeated by what had just happened. His heart ripped in two as he watched her stare at the sky, sobbing from her core over what she would view as complete failure. He ran to her and caught her just before she crumpled to the ground. He fell into the wet puddle beneath her and braced her fall, settling her on his lap as she continued to sob.

She held a death grip on his arms, and he let her sorrow leak from her. Lightning bounced around them, thunder echoing though the night, but not loud enough to drown out her pain. He continued to hold her, not knowing what else to do but cradle her in his arms and think of the thousand different ways he would kill Duff Erskine.

Tonight she needed him.

Erskine could wait until the morrow.

Chapter Eighteen

The following morning, Logan and Father Rab sat in the room behind the Kirk, waiting for Gwyneth to arise. She knew that, yet she couldn’t bring herself to get off the pallet after what she had done—
hadn’t
done—the night before. The two carried on a whispered conversation, but she couldn’t make out their words. She was glad of it, as she’d heard enough about her failings from Erskine. She didn’t need to hear any more, particularly not from her loved ones.

No one knew better than she did about how badly she had failed. Finally pulling herself from the bed, she washed herself using the basin on the table and dressed in clean clothes before heading out into the room where her brother sat at the table with Logan.

She stepped into the doorway, and no matter how she tried, she couldn’t right her slumped shoulders. Ramsay had held her for hours the previous night, just letting her release the pain of her failure. He was indeed a special man.

Both men stood as she entered the room, and she waved them back down into their seats. Not heeding her wordless request, Rab strode over and wrapped his arms around her.

She rested her head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Rab. I failed you and Da and Gordon. I’m sure Logan filled you in on everything.”

“Gwyneth,” Rab set her back and held her hands in hers. “Bless you, but you could never fail me. I am glad you didn’t kill him. Now I don’t have to take you into the Kirk to pray for the Lord’s forgiveness for your soul.”

Her brother smiled and she couldn’t help but return it. Of course, he wasn’t disappointed in her. It didn’t matter; she knew her failings well enough.

She glanced at Logan before sitting down at the table. “My thanks for standing by me last night and keeping your word.” Her voice had dropped to a whisper and she couldn’t look him in the eye, but she had said what she needed to say.

Rab set a bowl of porridge down in front of her, but she did little more than play with it, unable to eat just yet. “Logan tells me you were operating under verra difficult conditions last night. The storm was nasty. How could anyone possibly shoot in the dark and the rain? You are not a failure, Gwyneth.”

Her brow furrowed as she peered at Logan. “Difficult conditions?” There hadn’t been any difficult conditions. She’d finally been given several chances to kill the blackguard, and she’d squandered them all.

“Aye, the way the sky opened up as soon as you followed him to the stables. Rain, wind, and lightning can all affect your aim.” Logan said as he glanced at Rab.

“I have practiced in the rain. It’s never been a problem before.” She shook her head to dismiss such thoughts.

“Gwyneth, that wasn’t rain, it was a downpour. I don’t know how you could see to make your aim straight. Plus the rain slows your arrows down when it’s that heavy.”

She hadn’t given the possibility a thought. Aye, she had noticed the rain was blurring her vision, but her tears of frustration had not helped either. Could the rain really have changed the flight of her arrows?

“Aye,” Rab said. “He tells it true.”

“Fine, I accept that bad weather conditions affected me. I’ll have to make sure the weather looks fine the next time I pursue him.” She took a bite of her porridge and ignored the two men staring at her. The room had suddenly quieted.

Rab spoke first. “The next time? Gwyneth, please let it rest.”

“Rab, I can’t,” she said, pausing to shove a spoonful of porridge into her mouth. “Besides, he said he was coming back for me, that he was going to put me on another boat. It’s either Erskine or me.” She glanced at Logan. “You heard him say it, did you not, Ramsay?”

Logan nodded. “Aye, I did. He said he would be back within a sennight.”

“Well, you can’t Gwyneth. You had your chance. I won’t hear of it happening again.”

“Rab, I am sorry, but you can’t stop me. I will train a bit more and go after him again. I will finish this. So the rain got in my way. I have to. You know that.”

“Nay.” Rab shoved his chair back and stood up. “Nay, I will not allow this to continue. Enough, Gwyneth. You must let it go.”

Gwyneth stared at him, never having seen her brother this adamant before. She didn’t know what to say, though she knew he couldn’t stop her.

Logan stood and walked over to put a comforting arm across her brother’s shoulders. “Father, I understand your concern, but she’s right. He said he would come back for her and soon. Something must be done. You don’t want to see your sister sold as a sexual slave in the East, do you?”

With that, her brother paled and grabbed the edge of the table. Logan helped him into his chair. “That is why he kidnaps women?” He took out a linen square and mopped his forehead. “‘Tis heinous.”

Logan sat down again. “Aye, he is a despicable man, and unless something is done, he will continue with his crimes and kidnap Gwyneth and others. Perhaps Gwyneth would agree not to approach him without me next time.” His gaze bore into her at his comment.

“Aye, Gwyneth, please do this for me. Promise me, sister. Although you promised before and left without him. Please. Take him with you. ” Her brother’s voice had reached an anxious pitch.

How she hated to upset him. Rab stared at her expectantly, and she wanted to promise him, but she didn’t know if she could. She would pursue Erskine when the time was right, whether Logan was there or not.

“Father, would you be agreeable if I also committed to training her? You and your family have trained her and done a terrific job, but I think she needs someone to be a wee bit tougher on her.”

Gwyneth jerked her head to stare at him. What was this game?

“Aye, I did train her, but I don’t understand what further training she could need.”

“Father, you’re a man of the cloth, so I don’t expect you to understand such things.” He reached over to wrap his large hands around Gwyneth’s, which rested on the table. He glanced at her when he spoke. “Don’t be upset with me. I must speak my mind.”

He returned his attention to Rab, still holding her hands, his touch imparting a welcome comfort. “She needs to be trained by someone who can be nasty, someone who can be hard on her.”

Rab shook his head. “And you can do this? Why? I don’t understand.”

Logan’s mouth set in a grim line as he rubbed his thumbs over the back of her hands. “It wasn’t just the rain that got in her way last night… It wasn’t even mostly the rain. He got in her head, Father.”

“What?” Rab glanced back and forth between them.

Logan continued. “He got in her head, accusing her of weakness, of being a failure. He ruthlessly taunted her, knowing how his words would upset her. No matter how hard she trains, she is a woman, and women are more sensitive…”

Gwyneth wrenched her hands back and shoved so hard against the table that she knocked her chair over. “I am not, Ramsay.”

“Gwyneth, would you please sit down and hear me out?”

Tears pricked her eyes as she met his gaze, the truth settling in her mind. She went over everything Duff had shouted at her as he walked away. He had used her weaknesses against her. Now she understood. Erskine had picked at her failings and twisted everything in her mind, making her believe what he said was true. She had made it true. Ramsay was right. She had never considered such a thing before. She set her chair to rights and sat down, staring at her hands in her lap.

Logan reached under the table for her closest hand and held it tight in his own. “‘Tis well known that women are more sensitive than men, and much more likely to react to attacks of character. Sometimes bad men use this knowledge to control their wives or mistresses.”

Gwyneth didn’t look at him, but gripped his hand tightly. “How do you know this?” He was right; she knew it in her gut. She had fallen prey to Erskine’s trickery.

“Some training I received a while ago. Doesn’t matter where. What matters is that you need to train your mind against it. Recognize it for what it is and fight back. I believe I can help you with that, though you won’t like me when I do.”

Gwyneth raised her gaze to his. “How?”

“I’ll get in your head like he did and pull at your weaknesses. We’ll go to the butts and I’ll train you to ignore me while you’re shooting. And you
will
hate me.” He said these last words with a sigh. “We’ll start first thing tomorrow.”

“Nay, today. I wish to start today.” Gwyneth glanced at Logan and then at her brother. “I accept. Rab, if you give me your blessing to train with him, I’ll agree to take him with me when I finish this.”

Father Rab closed his eyes and nodded. Then he opened them and grasped Ramsay’s hand in his and said, “Please protect my sister.”

Chapter Nineteen

A couple of hours later, they headed to the butts. Gwyneth grabbed an oatcake and followed Logan out into the misty morning. Mounting her horse, she shoved the food in her mouth and followed him down the lane to the butts. She planned to be there practicing all day.

When they arrived, Logan helped her dismount and kissed her cheek. Her body responded to his touch, just as it always did.

“What was that for?” she asked, still unsure of what they had between them.

His hand slid down the curve of her back, then rubbed her bum before he grinned and gave her a soft push toward the shooting area. She jumped at the contact, surprised at how one touch from this man could set off a bevy of responses across her skin that oft ended at the juncture of her thighs. This would not help her aim one bit.

She scowled but made her way over to the target area, awaiting his answer even though he didn’t seem inclined to give her one.

“That was to remind you that I do have strong feelings for you, and that you can’t take anything I say today to heart,” he said, his gaze serious. “I know I will anger you and even hurt you, but ‘tis for your own good. I will throw comments at you that are meant to upset you. Your job is to harden yourself and not allow what I say to change your focus and sense of purpose. Understood?”

“Aye.” What could he possibly say to upset her that much? She would know he didn’t mean it, so whatever he said would be easy to ignore. Insults coming from Logan would not upset her; she trusted him. Erskine was another story.

“Set yourself up. I’m going closer to the target and off to the side. I have seen how your shots go awry when you are upset. Promise not to shoot me, Gwyneth?” He winked at her as he crossed the field.

She ignored him. What a ridiculous question. Since she was quite sure she loved him, why would she ever shoot him? Hell, but the man conjured up dreams such as she’d never experienced before meeting him. Last night, she had woken up drenched in sweat, memories of a very hot tussle on the ground with him fresh in her mind. Nay, she’d never shoot him. Jump him? Yes. She couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across her face at the thought of running over and wrapping her legs around his midsection, ripping off her top before thrusting her right nipple straight into his...

Logan’s voice broke into her thoughts. “Gwyneth, I’d like your pledge on that. I’m not jesting. Do you promise not to shoot me?”