Read Knees Up Mother Earth Online
Authors: Robert Rankin
Tags: #sf_humor, #Fiction, #Fantasy, #General, #Science Fiction, #Humorous, #Humorous Stories
For so it is written, that no matter wherever a groundskeeper will be employed, that groundskeeper will
always
be a Scotsman. (Check out
The Simpsons
if you are in doubt.)
The Campbell’s Scottish accent having been established, it can now be taken as read, so to speak.
Which he was saving up to have surgically removed. This player did
not
attend the post-match communal showers.
The term “reunion concert” is mostly a misnomer. It means that the band that have been playing endlessly and relentlessly for the last three decades have got a new gig in a town they haven’t played before.
Dave is the one with the exceedingly large ears. In case by chance you might have forgotten. As if!
Lest the reader think that the opportunity for another running gag about musically inclined authors was passed up here, let it be said that Stevie Wonder began as an author, but changed his mind and became a musician instead. Something to do with him not being able to see the the typewriter keys. Or something.
“And the roar of his Triumph could be heard throughout the land.” Exodus (somewhere or other).
As John is a generic name for
Blue Peter
presenters, no conclusions can be drawn as to his actual identity (thankfully).
Possibly something to do with that movie
The Exorcist
and the now legendary line, “Your mother darns socks in Hell!”
The telephonist had recently worked in Budgens.
A Code 10 is a price check at the checkout.
A Code 14 is a man exposing himself in the customer car park.
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Document creation date: 2010-01-22
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