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Authors: Sibylla Matilde

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BOOK: Little Conversations
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 “Okay, buddy, what kind of pizza?” Devin asked as she
climbed in his pickup.  “I’m starving!”

“I just ordered a plain ol’ pepperoni, but I need to stop by
the store.  I am all out of Tabasco.”  Ronin said, looking at her out of the
corner of his eye while he drove. 

“Ewwww…  Okay, let’s run to the store, then.”

Ronin pulled into the grocery store parking lot.  They
walked through the automatic doors and made their way through the aisles
looking for the Tabasco.  Wistfully, Devin watched Ronin out of the corner of
her eye.  She still felt weird, icky twinges when she thought of the other
night with Jake. 

And last night was… she wasn’t sure what last night was. 
But, somehow, it had sort of broken something loose in her.  As she walked
beside Ronin, she was doing her best not to blur the lines in their
friendship.  It really wasn’t fair to him.  It wasn’t right to go back and
forth like she had been. 

But she was suddenly really, truly finding it hard
not
to touch him.  It seemed like the most natural thing in the world to grab his
hand as they walked down the aisles.  It took everything in her to hold back.  She
was always holding back. 
For what?  For Jake?
  She thought back again to
Ronin’s words on the phone this morning.  The guy had a point. 
Would she
ever be able to trust Jake, even if he did break up with Melanie and come back
to her? 

Suddenly, Ronin stopped walking, set the basket down, and
turned to her.

“Come here, sweetheart,” he said, his hand outstretched. 

“Ronin, what are you—”

His eyes narrowed.  “Just come closer.  Listen.”

She stepped up to him and he pulled her closer, his hands on
her hips as hers landed on his chest.  Devin’s skin tingled everywhere his body
contacted hers.  His lips brushed a burning trail across her forehead before he
rested his cheek just above her ear.  He started to sway, a small turn, a slow
step and another turn.

“Ronin, what the hell…?” she trailed off. 

“Shhhhh, just listen,” he whispered in her ear.

It took a minute for her brain to catch on, but Don Henley’s
voice began singing
The Last Worthless Evening
, and the words slowly
registered to her as they drifted through the speakers in the store.  As he
danced her slowly in the aisle, one of his hands slipped from her hip to slide
up her back, pulling her even closer.  Devin’s hands rested on his shoulders as
he pulled back to gaze down at her. 

“I don’t understand.  What are you doing?” Devin asked
quietly. 

“This song,” he whispered, “Joe’s always playing DJ during
parties, and the guy hasn’t bought a new CD since we were in the eighth grade. 
But this song.  That first night when you showed up at my house for a party, this
was playing when I first saw you.”

Overcome by this admission, she could only look at him with
her mouth gaping open.  Unsure of what to say, she rested her forehead against
his chest, letting the lyrics wash over her.  From time to time, Ronin’s voice,
barely a rumble in his chest, barely a breath, would
almost
form the
words of the song… entreating her to give him a chance.

A little, old lady appeared at the end of the aisle, pushing
her cart towards them.  Seeing their quiet rhythmic steps, she smiled sweetly,
and turned back around, heading to a different aisle.  Ronin continued to sway
to the music, pulling her along with him until they moved as one person, and
the lyrics continued to echo through Devin’s mind. 

The song ended entirely too soon, and Ronin pulled back somewhat,
cupping her cheek and softly kissing her on the lips.  He took a half-step
back, looking at her, as though he was trying to gauge her thoughts.  In that
moment, that look in his eyes—her spirit screamed at her to get her heart off
the shelf.    

Fuck baseball…

“We should go,” she whispered breathlessly, unable and
unwilling to pull her gaze from his. 

Ronin glanced over her shoulder.  “There’s the Tabasco,” he
said softly with a smile, reaching over her head and grabbing a bottle.  Devin’s
body and mind remained frozen in the sweet moment as Ronin picked up the
basket.  Standing straight, he slid his other arm around her waist, tucking his
fingers lightly into the waistband of her skirt, and guided her towards the
check stand.

Chapter 15 – Don’t Pull Back

 

 

 

They sat on Ronin’s couch eating pizza out of the box and
watched The Expendables 2, which, in Ronin’s mind was far superior to the first. 
Every major action star from the past couple decades together in one movie.  Quite
the appropriate choice for Ronin, really.  He wasn’t exactly the kind to go for
something mushy and lovey-dovey.  The guy sorta made Chuck Norris and
Sly-Rocky-Rambo look meek. 

Devin picked up their napkins and the pizza box as she walked
into the kitchen.  She put the leftover pizza in the fridge and grabbed a
couple bottles of beer before she closed the door.  As she sat sideways on the
couch facing Ronin, she leaned her shoulder up against the back.  He looked
down at her, and she handed him one of the bottles.  Twisting the top off, he handed
it back to her, making Devin smile at his chivalry, before he reached for the
second one.  He took a couple sips, his eyes on the movie, and Devin studied him
closely.  His smile.  The way his eyes crinkled in the corner when he laughed. 
The way he slid his tongue along his lips after taking a sip of his beer.  Goosebumps
shot down her arms.

Ronin glanced over to see Devin watching him and not the
movie.  The dim light in the room made his eyes glow with a luminescence that
hypnotized her.  Her mouth went dry, and her heart rate picked up as his
expression began to change.  His eyesight shifted momentarily to the slight
rise and fall of her chest, and she could almost feel his gaze touching her skin. 
He audibly groaned at the slight tremble of her lips.

“You okay, honey?” he huskily asked.

Devin lowered her gaze for a minute and then looked back up
at him.  “You were right,” she finally said in a low voice.  Ronin looked at
her quizzically, unsure exactly where she was going with this, but he didn’t
speak.  He waited for her to continue and, before long, she did.  “Letting go,
moving on—it means I have to accept that it’s really over with Jake.  That I
need to cut that last string; that last tie that keeps dragging me along.  As
long as I keep hoping he might want me back, this shit will never stop.”  Devin
took a deep breath and looked down.  Her voice dropped to a whisper.  “But it
is really over,” she exhaled with a shaky breath and looked back into his eyes.
 “I’m ready to let go.”

Ronin’s breath caught and his gaze became intense.  “Honey,”
he said softly, “what is it you’re getting at?”

Devin reached for his bottle and set it, and hers, on the
small table beside the couch.  Biting her lip, she raised her eyes back to his.
 “I want… this.”  She motioned between the two of them.  “You and me.”

Ronin froze while the words she barely whispered registered.
 “You sure?”

Devin nodded almost imperceptibly, feeling a tingle of
desire course through her.

“Because I will stop if you ask me to,” he said quietly,
clenching his eyes shut, and then his hazel gaze met hers again, burning intensely
with need.  “But, honey, it’s starting to take everything I have to pull back.”

She could barely breathe as she turned away from his
piercing gaze for a moment.  Watching her hand as it moved to rest on his knee,
she rose gently and reached across him with her other hand.  Her heart
fluttered as she pushed his arms to his sides.  In a fluid motion, she slid her
leg over him, climbing onto his lap to face him, flush up against him.  Her breath
grew choppy as her hands rose to caress his stubbly cheeks.  Her lips drew
towards his.

“Don’t pull back,” she whispered a hair’s breadth from his
lips.  “I need this.  I need…”  The words evaporated in her throat as she
focused on his lips, so she simply touched them with her own.  Softly, slowly, she
kissed him.  For a moment, she feared he would push her away.  And then his
mouth moved faintly against hers.  His tongue grazed her lips, and he turned
his head to deepen the kiss.  For the first time in forever, everything felt so
incredibly right.

“You,” she exhaled into his mouth.  “I need… you.”  

Her lips met his again with a bruising force, and one of his
hands slid up her back, pausing at the base of her neck, and then tangled in her
hair as it gripped her tighter.  The other rested on her hip, clenching feverishly. 
Devin moaned and unconsciously pressed harder against him, his hands gripping her
more tightly in response.

She pulled back somewhat, looking at him with a heated gaze. 
For a moment, his eyes showed a wary vulnerability, as though he anticipated her
following her usual pattern, coming onto him before pulling away.  His left hand
fell from the nape of her neck to rest on her hip, mirroring the right. 

Breathing heavily, she slowly reached down to the hem of her
shirt, and pulled it over her head.  His eyes darkened and his breath caught.  She
slipped her hand behind her back, releasing the hooks of her bra, and slowly
pulled it off as well.  His hands drifted to the bare skin of her thighs,
holding on so tightly that she was sure there would be dark bruises the next
day. 

“Please, don’t pull back,” she repeated softly as she
slipped her shaking fingers through his short hair, pulling his lips back to hers. 
She could feel the conflict in him, the tremble that ran through him, as she
kissed him.  Her fingers slipped to the buttons on his shirt, deftly undoing
them and baring his chest.  She pulled him closer to her, away from the back of
the couch as she pushed the shirt off his shoulders and down to his elbows,
trapping them close to his sides. 

Devin wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed herself
against him, skin to skin.  The coarse hair of his chest feathered against the silky
softness of her breasts, her nipples aching where they rubbed up against him.  Still,
his hands remained locked at her hips, his mind unwilling to give in.  She had
led him here before and had always pulled back, always left him painfully wanting
her.  A moment of shame burned through her as she thought of her callous
actions and his gun-shy response. 

Not this time though.  This time, she wanted him with every
fiber of her being. 

Her hands fluttered down from his neck as she reverently
kissed him, her fingers caressing each smooth ripple of muscle from his
shoulders to his waist, feeling him tense beneath her as she began to work the
fly of his jeans.  Her lips left his to travel across his jaw, over to his ear.
 “Please,” she whispered again.  “I want this.  I want you.”

“Fuck, honey.  I’m right here for you,” he muttered softly.  “I’ve
been here… for you, for so long.”

Her fingers began to unfasten the fly of his jeans, slowly
releasing him.  She kissed and suckled and nibbled at the cords of his neck as she
worked him free and stroked his length, growing braver and feeling the need
build inside her.  Ronin jerked a fraction and strained against the confines of
the shirt that held his arms immobile.  Groaning harshly, his hands inched their
way along the edge of her skirt, baring more of her skin in their wake. 

She rose up a little on her knees as one of her hands pulled
aside her panties.  Her eyes held his as she used the other hand to position
him at her entrance.  Slowly, she sank down on him.  His moan and the clench of
his fingers into her thighs set her on fire as he filled her, impaled her, made
her whole. 

She was his, truly possessed by him. 
Finally
.

Using the muscles in her thighs, Devin began to gently raise
and lower her body, rocking against him very slowly to feel every sensation
gained from his hard length as it slid so intimately inside her.  She struggled
to choke back breathy sobs, but couldn’t contain the sounds coming from her
throat as she begged and pleaded for him to move with her.  His hands slid
around to grip her backside almost painfully, and he began to guide her into a
slow rhythm, meeting her gentle thrusts. 

“Oh fuck,” she mumbled against his neck.  “You feel so… Oh,
God… fuck me.”

One of Ronin’s hands slipped out of the restraining shirt
and reached up to cradle her jaw, pulling her mouth back to his.  “God, baby,” he
breathed into her.  “If you stop, it’s gonna kill me.”  His other hand stayed down
at the curve of her ass, pulling her more tightly against him.  She rolled her
hips once, twice, and Ronin’s head fell back on the couch with the agonizing
potency of the sensation. 

“Dev… Jesus Christ, Dev,” he groaned.

Her own head fell back on her shoulders, pushing her breasts
forward as her body clenched around him.  Ronin opened his eyes, and he leaned
forward a bit.  His lips fell upon her nipple, sucking it firmly into his mouth
and causing a gasp to fly out of Devin’s throat.  Ronin’s hand slipped down
between them, touching the exquisite spot where they were joined.  His thumb
teased her clit, and his hand massaged them both with the surrounding moisture as
she pushed up and down on his aching cock. 

“Ronin,” she exhaled.  “oh, please… don’t stop.”  Devin’s
muscles began to tense and tighten, her entire body gripping him as they moved
together.  Her fingernails raked across his shoulders as her head fell forward. 
Her body went rigid, and then she exploded into waves of tremulous pleasure,
wracked with fierce jolts. 

She vaguely felt Ronin shift, lifting her easily, using his
arm to lower her to the coffee table.  Never breaking contact, he began to
pound furiously into her.  Still riding the waves of her orgasm, she felt
another one building deep inside her as he stroked against her.  He shifted her
just a little, and the new angle of his penetration tore a long, loud cry from
her throat.  She felt a new and incredibly strong pressure begin to emanate
from her core. 

“Look at me, sweetheart,” Ronin breathed.

Devin’s eyes opened to see him above her, gazing down at her
as he worked her over, picking up speed, driving into her harder with each
thrust.  Her muscles clenched deep inside, and tremors began to build intensely
inside her.  His breath stuttered, his eyes locked on her, and she curled into him,
shaking wildly, shamelessly screaming his name into his shoulder.  With a
groan, she felt a shudder run through Ronin’s body, and felt the warmth of his climax
surge into her. 

They lay there trembling, attempting to catch their breath. 
Devin luxuriated in the sensitivity he had evoked from her.  She had never come
undone so vehemently, like her entire body was shaking apart and bursting into
a million bright stars. 
Why hadn’t they done this sooner?

Ronin chuckled, and she realized her question had been out
loud.  “I tried, honey.  I knew it would be like this.”  He raised his head and
looked down at her lying on the coffee table below him.  He nuzzled the hair
from her eyes.  “Every time I kissed you, every time you trembled at my touch, I
knew.  And every time you pulled away… fuck, I thought I was dying.”

He lifted off her, wrenching another sharp breath from her
as he slipped out of her tender swollen flesh.  He lifted her up with him back
to the couch, settling her still straddling him on his lap.  She felt limp,
sated,
a-fucking-mazing
.

“Well,” she breathed out, “I’m a fucking idiot.  That was
incredible.”

“Honey, you were worth the wait,” he murmured with a smile.  “But
I am in no way done with you tonight.”

Ronin scooted her hips back slightly and tucked himself back
into his jeans, leaving the fly undone.  Then he pulled her more closely up
against him and stood with her legs wrapped around his waist, carrying her draped
over him back to his bedroom.  Beside his bed, he slid her body down the front
of him until her feet touched the floor.  Then, reaching behind her, he
unfastened her skirt, all the while nibbling slightly at the delicious spot just
behind her ear, exploring the delicate curve of her neck.  A tingling vibration
fluttered through her as Devin felt Ronin pushed her skirt down her hips until
it fell to the floor. 

Dropping his lips to her collarbone, they delved a little
lower towards the swell of her breast, and Devin arched her back to allow him
access.  His tongue teased the skin around her nipple, causing it to harden with
aching anticipation.  His hands slid up to both her breasts, firmly cupping
them as his lips caressed back and forth across the soft flesh, skirting the
aching buds.  Devin’s fingers traced the heavy musculature of his arms, urging
his hands towards her nipples.

“Ronin, please,” she whimpered.

“Mmm, not yet, honey,” Ronin murmured against her skin
between kisses and slight nips of his teeth.  “This time, I want to savor every
bit of you.”  

Devin’s nails clenched into his solid forearms, and her eyes
closed tightly, as though she was unable to fully take in both the sight and
the feel of him taunting her body.  His left hand slid behind her, pulling her
closer as his lips found the skin on the underside of her breast.  She gasped
at the sensation.  Putting all her weight on one leg, she lifted the other to
slide up his side and hook around his waist.  The wetness of her panties
pressed against his abdominal muscles, forcing a soft growl from Ronin’s throat. 
His hands slid along her tense body, exploring every bit of her skin as his
lips and tongue trailed along behind—across smooth valley between her breasts,
the fine skin just above her navel, and back up to her collar bone.

“Ronin,” she begged again with a sharp breath.

“Shhhhh…”  And his lips again circled her breasts, leaving her
nipples painfully tight and unassuaged.  “I could do this forever.”

His hand began to drift down her back and slipped beneath
her panties to cup her ass, squeezing lightly as he palmed it and mimicked the
motions and rhythm of his other hand and his mouth on her breast.    Devin’s
entire body swayed from the passion he elicited in her, and he guided her back
slightly, taking the tiny step that brought them closer to his bed.  His hand
left the curve of her backside to nudge her hips back a little more, pushing
slightly and lowering her to the mattress. 

BOOK: Little Conversations
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