Obsession (A Bad Boy's Secret Baby) (7 page)

I loaded my two girls and three boys into the car and we set off. My job didn't pay a lot, but being able to see Ashley, Ben and the other ten year olds grow and learn was immensely rewarding. Spending the rest of the day with them made me want to have a family and kids of my own so badly.

Kids... I thought, idly checking my phone again for hundredth time. My priorities were so backwards. I sighed, seeing no reply. Mal was the only man I'd ever wanted any kind of real future with. That realization brought me so low.

“Are you okay, miss Kait?” Ashley asked as I dropped them all back off. I waved to the kid's parents who were waiting in idling cars nearby.

“Yeah, sweetie. It was just a really good movie.” I wiped my eyes, smiling at Ashley, then chuckled to hide the pain. “And sometimes good things make you cry.”

Ashley hugged me, then ran for her parents.

I stayed in my car for a while after the parents and staff had left, not knowing what to do with myself. I didn't want to go home and face the happily married couple. After about an hour, darkness had blanketed Springfield and I finally mustered up the courage to call Mal directly. Maybe for whatever reason his phone just didn't get text messages.

It went right to voice mail.

And then I started to sob.

Malik

––––––––

“H
ave a good night, Earl. Thanks again.” I closed the fire station door behind me.

It had been almost a week since I'd seen or talked to Kait and that silence was eating me alive. I still hadn't received my replacement phone from my shitty carrier in the mail, despite paying for overnight shipping.

I'd gone to the library every day to try to find contact information for her online. Neither of us had Facebook accounts, or if she did, it was hidden really well. She mentioned that she worked with autistic kids, but with so many schools and programs in Springfield alone, that didn't narrow it down much.

Short of going directly to her house, there was fuck-all I could do to get a hold of her. Considering that she still lived with Brendan, that option was off the table. I needed to contact her privately and explain what had happened.

She must have tried calling me by now. My whole body tensed as I got on to my bike, my grip threatened to bend the handle bars. What did she think of me right now? She probably thought I was gone again, that I just rolled into town, fucked the shit out of her then moved on.

Another worry sparked in the back of my heart. What if she just didn't want to talk to me? What if she came to her senses and realized that she didn't actually need me in her life? My insides twisted at the thought.

What if I never got to see her again?

It was all so fucked up!

I was so angry with myself for fucking things up again that I actually growled. I started my bike up and rode it around town; it helped to clear my head and vent this mountain of frustration that had been building up.

I got my bike out of impound and fortunately the damage wasn't bad enough that I couldn't fix it. Every night since then, I rode aimlessly through the city, just praying that I would see her or her car.

I had taken Kait's advice and checked out the fire stations for work. Eventually a small, single company station took me in. Officially I was just a volunteer until I finished my training. Being in the Marines definitely helped fast track me, but there was still a bunch of stuff I needed to learn. Good guys though, they even let me use their equipment to work on my bike.

I wasn't on their twenty-four hour shifts yet so I found myself with more free time than I knew what to do with. I was about to head back to the motel and tear my phone company a new asshole when I saw a flash of red pull down a side street behind me. I jacked on my breaks, dropped gear, planted a foot and did a reckless one-eighty much to the angry honks of the cars around me.

I didn't care.

If there was even a chance that it was Kait, I had to take it. I was lucky there were no cops around for once. They had taken to following me whenever they saw me. They didn't pull me over and they always kept their distance, but were never all that subtle about it.

We see you, motherfucker,
the gesture said.
Just give us a reason.

It did make me smile that the one time they would've had a reason to harass me they were nowhere to be seen.

A felt a pang of worry when I lost the car. Then another pang when a red car that wasn't hers drove by.

Dammit!

I doubled back and circled the block. It was a good thing, too. Hidden in the back of a building I'd never seen before was a red Jetta. What the hell was this place? The sign read “Bounce” and the parking lot was packed. I was constantly reminded of how much had changed while I was away.

I parked next to the car and instantly recognized that it was Kait's. What'd she call her car?
Juan-
something? Why did she give her German car a Spanish name? It was so uniquely adorable, that I couldn't help but smile.

I would never find another girl like her.

There was a blast of color and music and screaming when I walked in. The whole place seemed designed to amp children up. I saw that it was one of those trampoline places. I thought she worked with kids as a tutor or something, what was she doing here?

Spotting Kait was easy, she was at least a head taller than all the children around her. Kait was all brilliant smiles. Her happiness was infectious, just seeing her made my whole day brighter.

Her dark hair was pulled back into a ponytail that looked a full shade brighter in the aggressive lighting. She wore a gray tank top and black yoga pants. The athletic look suited her. More than suited her, really. I couldn't take my eyes off her. Her ample tits were fully covered, but all the bouncing...

I snapped my eyes away when I felt my core heat up and my cock stir to life. I took a few deep breaths and bought a wristband from one of their kiosk registers. I ran through the names of the offensive line of our AFC championship team. I needed to cool my jets and settle my cock in a place like this or else I was bound to get arrested.

Kait sure as hell wasn't going to make it easy for me though.

“Hey.” I half climbed, half rolled onto the massive play area and called out to her. I had to duck a dodge ball that whirred through the air.

“What are you doing here?” Kait glanced at me warily, her smile withered. It wasn't the greeting I was hoping for. I knew right away that this was going to be an uphill conversation.

“Is it not obvious that I was in the mood for some trampoline action?” I shouted to her over the noise but as the words came out of my mouth I realized how silly they were. I wore heavy, stained jeans and a faded T shirt with holes at the bottom. I looked and—probably smelled—like a mechanic. One of the fire trucks needed some engine work done today.

Kait's full kissable lips became a humorless thin line as she raised her eyebrows to the joke and resumed playing and encouraging the kids. Funny wasn't going to work when she was so obviously hurt by me disappearing again.

Hadn't she talked to Brendan? Didn't she know what happened?

I cleared half the play surface in a series of short jumps, kids were everywhere and I didn't want to accidentally hurt one.

“I'm sorry for not getting back to you sooner. After I dropped you off—” I stopped. No, of course he wouldn't tell her the whole story. If he was trying to make me out to be the villain he thought I was, he'd probably leave out a few minor details. Like all of it. “I wrecked my bike and destroyed my phone on the way back to the motel.”

That revelation drew a concerned look from Kait as her eyes flashed over me to see if I was hurt. She touched the side of my face right below the still faintly visible pistol barrel burn. The ice in her voice melted, but only for a moment. “Are you okay?”

The emotional walls came back up almost immediately as she tentatively pulled her hand away from my face. I hated that sad look in her eyes. It was the look that told her not to get invested.

He's only going to hurt you again.

It was true. I fucking had hurt her again, even if it wasn't my fault. It didn't matter. The effect was still the same. I felt like the world's biggest asshole. Why did I always hurt the ones I cared the most about?

“What happened?” Kait asked, putting a little more distance between us.

“I'm alright. The bike's seen better days.” Another joke that fell flat. “It was just an accident. I got it safe to ride again though. Can I take you out?”

“I don't know.” She wouldn't look me in the eyes. I could feel her drifting away from me. It was horrible. “Everything is crazy right now.”

“I'm still here.” I bounced closer to her, I couldn't let her wall me out. Not when we were so close to having something actually meaningful. “I'm not going anywhere. I didn't break that promise. Don't push me away, please.” I took her hand in mine. “At least not until you know everything about me and about what happened.”

We were toward the back enough that we didn't have to shout over the noise. It still should've felt ridiculous to have this conversation in a trampoline fun house, but I pushed all that away. I was fixated on only Kait, trying to carefully read the emotions that she attempted to bury.

She was my whole world.

That was probably why I didn't see the foam ball until it bounced off the side of my face.

“I got your boyfriend, Miss Kait!” A little girl across the painted line shouted, and all the other kids on her team laughed.

It took a full beat for either of us to realize what had happened. Kait's solemn expression cracked as she failed to stifle a small laugh.

“I guess I'm out.” I frowned, looking playfully defeated. I paused a moment, my frown shifting into a smile. “Your girl has a mean arm.”

“Ashley isn't to be trifled with.” Kait shook her head. But far too soon I saw her good humor wane. It wasn't working. I couldn't break through all that pain. When Kait fully cut someone out of her life she never let them back in. It scared me.

“Okay.” I nodded and began to leave. I wanted to stay, but there was nothing else I could do. I said my piece, it was up to her now. I couldn't force her to do anything. This had nothing to do with her brother at this point. The only way I was going to see her again is if
she
wanted me to.

“One month,” her words stopped me between bounces.

I just barely ducked another ball by Ashley. I shot the girl a stern look that turned into waving hands and a playful tongue-out raspberry.

“Brendan and Mariela go on their honeymoon in a month,” Kait swallowed, found her resolve and continued. “We can get together then.”

I nodded, making my way to the stairs by the edge of the play area so I wouldn't provoke another vicious dodge ball attack. It took some effort to keep my smile from swallowing my face.

“I should have a new phone soon. Same number. Text me yours again in a few days.”

Kait nodded in agreement.

“Hey, Ashley,” I called out to the little girl as I made my way off the trampolines. “Nice throw. Next time I'm on your team.”

That round of play ended while I was lacing up my boots. I sat on the other side of the raised play area, but was still close enough to hear Kait wrangle the kids and set up the next game.

“I like him.” The little girl's voice poked through the din of chaos and music.

“He's not my boyfriend, Ashley.”

“I still like him.”

Kait

––––––––

I
placed the phone on the porcelain counter. It was still warm from my conversation with Mal. He had just gotten out of work and was on his way over for our date.
An actual date!
I was giddy.

Or I would have been if I didn't feel like throwing up. I thought it was nerves, but I felt nauseous all day. Was my body trying to sabotage me?

“OK, Google.” I said to my phone, which lit to let me know that it was listening.

Maybe I had a cold? That would make sense, I did work with children. I thought about this past fall when Jonathan sneezed directly into my face. I loved the filthy little monsters, but they weren’t the best at personal space and boundaries, and one of them always tended to be ill.

I rattled off my symptoms as I uncorked a bottle of Pepto and took a long swig. Mal and I had been planning this date for a month now and I was determined not to reschedule. We had such a short window of time before Brendan and Mariela came back. Mal told me that he had every detail of tonight planned out, not that he would tell me—

'Early signs of pregnancy include,' read the bold black letters on my phone's screen

I choked on the text and spat the pink bismuth liquid against the mirror. My nose painfully tingled from the medicine that was caught in my sinus cavity.

You've got to be fucking kidding me.
I felt frantic.

No, that's crazy. I couldn't be pregnant, Mal wore a condom! He also was the only person I had had sex with... in far too long.
That
didn't do great things for my self-esteem. I hadn't even slept with my last boyfriend and that was almost a year ago.

I thought about my symptoms and realized that I hadn't had my period yet. Another wave of nausea cramped my stomach, it was nearly seven in the evening. Morning sickness was, well, a morning thing, wasn't it? I checked my phone. 'Some women get it all day, sometimes even all throughout the pregnancy'.

Joy.

I sat on the closed toilet and texted my friend Lisa, Mariela's coworker at the hospital, and asked her to discretely make me an appointment. I would pick up some of the at-home pregnancy tests tomorrow morning and see for myself, but just in case they came up positive I had to know for sure as soon as possible. Worry set in. What if it was true?

What if I was pregnant?

Over this past month, Mal and I talked constantly and everything was going great. Our relationship, if you could call it that yet, was so new. Should I tell him? My stomach sank as the dark thoughts filtered in. What if he runs away? Mal seemed serious about wanting to stay, but this was a big deal. The biggest of all the deals!