Pisces: From Behind That Locked Door (17 page)

"I can get you ready," Jay offered.

Stephen handed Jay the bottle and straddled his hips again. The muscles in his thighs flexed, and his skin stretched tight over his abdomen. His hand went directly to his cock while Jay poured a very liberal amount of oil over his fingers, and Jay felt a new twinge of doubt. For once, he wasn't worried over whether or not Stephen wanted him, but he was very concerned about his performance level. He didn't want to hurt Stephen, and the fact remained that he didn't know what he was doing.

"Maybe... maybe you should do it, actually," Jay said.

"No, I've been thinking about all the ways I want you buried inside of me. This is definitely on the list."

"Oh."

"Yeah," Stephen breathed, taking Jay by the wrist and guiding his hand around Stephen's hips. Jay slid his fingertips between Stephen's cheeks until he found the rapidly clenching and relaxing pucker. Stephen still held him firm, the heel of his hand pressing down on Jay's knuckles until the tip of his forefinger sank past his muscle. "That's it."

Jay worked his finger in slowly, watching for any signs of pain or displeasure. Jay needn't have worried. Stephen had looked happy with his mouth around Jay's cock, but now he seemed positively lost in the pleasure. He released Jay's hand and began rocking his hips, his cock nudging Jay's stomach while he fucked himself.

"More. Add another finger."

Jay wasn't going to question him. He seemed like a man who knew what he wanted. The addition of a second finger prompted Stephen's small whimpers to grow to full moans, and Jay's need to fuck Stephen intensified until it eclipsed every other desire he'd ever had in his life.

"Another."

Jay's third finger wasn't coated with lube, but Stephen didn't seem to notice. His muscles clenched so tightly around Jay's fingers that he couldn't even imagine how Stephen would feel around his cock--hot and pulsing with life, thrumming with energy, aching and sweating and beautiful.

"God, Jay, I'm ready. Fuck me."

With the condom in place and both of them slick and trembling, Stephen sank back against Jay's cock, guiding the tip to his tight hole. This wasn't going to work. Stephen was much too small, regardless of the lubricant, and this couldn't work. He would have explained this to Stephen, but Stephen was too busy proving him wrong. It
was
working. Quite well. The tip was already buried inside his passage, and Stephen was pushing back, sinking and sinking until they were both out of breath. Jay kept his eyes locked on Stephen's face, fascinated and adoring, like a pilgrim who'd traveled hundreds of miles to kiss an artifact that had once belonged to a saint. Watching Stephen was like watching poetry unwind itself in long, unbroken chains before dancing into a new form, creating a new shape. Jay felt a pang of guilt at the thought of his many fantasies--they'd all been so base, so naïve and shallow. Stephen clearly deserved more than that.

"Jay," Stephen choked out, pulling Jay from his feverish thoughts. He focused on Stephen's eyes, surprised by their luster. Now Stephen looked like the adoring one, as though the revelation had been his and not Jay's. The meaning of that refused to present itself, and Jay couldn't puzzle it out before Stephen was kissing him and claiming the final inches. Jay's balls brushed against Stephen's ass as he settled more firmly, his tongue dipping into Jay's mouth while his muscles, his body, the world, fluttered and clenched.

Jay decided it was a good thing Stephen had his tongue down Jay's throat, otherwise he was certain he'd just blurt everything. If he couldn't create the words to express the riot of emotions coursing through him, he'd borrow and steal them from Coleridge and Byron and Milton and Shakespeare. He'd pull verses from the Bible and
Don Quixote.
He'd babble through every Neruda stanza he could remember, and then he'd turn to Dante and Spenser. And still, he'd be incapable of expressing the true depths of devotion and awe that Stephen inspired when he rolled his hips like a slow tidal wave.

Despite the urgency and hunger, the pure need, they both moved quite slowly, as though deep under water. The air weighed heavily on their limbs and spines and breath. Jay wanted more friction, more heat, but he didn't want to disrupt the sweet balance between them, the give and take that he didn't even understand. It must have been an instinctive thing, something buried so deep it could only be accessed with the help of another person. Stephen's mouth was always on or near Jay's, their breath mingling, his hair brushing across Jay's brow. He couldn't be close enough. With their tongues sliding together and Stephen sheathed tightly around Jay's cock, they still weren't close enough. Jay enveloped him with both arms, not allowing so much as an inch of light to slip between their bodies.

"Stephen... I need... "

"What? Tell me."

"More."

"Then take it. Take what you need."

Jay appreciated the permission, but he'd hoped for more than that. Some sort of instruction or hint to let him know just where to find the final, missing piece. He rolled over without thinking, not pausing to consider if Stephen would even want their positions to be reversed. The new position allowed a different angle, and Stephen bit his lip and dropped his head back with the first hard thrust.

"Is that okay?" Jay asked breathlessly.

"Yes, yes. Just don't stop," Stephen said, wrapping his legs around Jay's hips. He grunted each time Jay pushed into him, his cheeks turning a brighter shade of red, his mouth slack and full, wanton. Now the words pounding against Jay's skull didn't seem familiar, and the rhythm wasn't iambic pentameter, like the great sonnets, but wild and explosive, syncopated and sharp, free verse based on the natural rise and fall of Stephen's chest.

"Harder," Stephen panted. "Harder. Harder. Harder." Until it became something of a poem itself. Jay responded automatically, pushing himself until his heart was pounding in his ears, but everything else felt so fucking good. If riding the stationary bicycle made him feel like he was close to touching divinity, he probably wouldn't mind exercising so much.

"Oh, Jay, I'm--"

Stephen tensed, clamping hard around Jay's length while his cock jerked, shooting sticky line after line of come onto Jay's belly. The knowledge that he'd somehow brought Stephen to this point was more than enough to send Jay over the edge for a second time. Jay couldn't say if it was better to come in Stephen's mouth or his ass, but the tight grip around his shaft was absolutely exquisite, and firecrackers seemed to go off in his ears and behind his eyes, until he was trembling, blind and deaf to everything but Stephen.

"Worth the wait?" Stephen asked as they pulled apart to breathe.

"You could say that."

"I could. Do you?"

"Yes." Jay smiled. "Definitely."

"Can I ask what prompted this extremely welcome turn of events?"

Jay wanted to enjoy the post-coital bliss by kissing soft trails on Stephen's shoulder, not talking about the events of the afternoon. But he supposed he did owe Stephen something of an explanation.

"I spoke with Jeni. And I realized I needed to accept her apology and let it go, for my own sake, if not for hers. And I thought... well, I wanted you to know that I want to change now. That I'm going to change. Though it took me over an hour to take that picture and send it."

"Thank you."

"For the picture?"

"Yes. But mostly for trusting me."

"I think I should be thanking you for being trustworthy."

Stephen idly skimmed his fingers over the hair on the back of Jay's arm. "So does that mean the two of you have called a truce?"

"Yes. I want Amy to be happy. Mostly I don't want to be the reason, even indirectly, that she's not."

"Let me make you dinner tonight."

"We could just order something in," Jay pointed out, loath to get out of bed for any reason.

Stephen kissed him. "Yeah, but I like cooking for you."

"Stephen, I... "

"What?"

"I... " No. It was probably too soon to say it, even if the feeling felt like it was as old as the cosmos. "I guess this means you're my boyfriend now?"

"I'm your boyfriend now and for as long as you'll have me."

"Forever." Jay murmured, not realizing he'd said it at all. He had though, and Stephen's smile softened in response.

"I don't mind the sound of that."

Jay blushed. "Really?"

Stephen answered the question with a careful, thorough kiss that not only confirmed he meant it, but stole the rest of Jay's doubts with it.

Pepper Espinoza lives in southern California with her husband and her cats. She has spent the last year working as a full time author, and intends to start graduate school in the fall.

You can learn more about Pepper by visiting her website: http://www.pepperverse.net

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