Recovery (14 page)

Some call me a party girl. People see me as happy, full of life, with absolutely no cares in the world. They see what I want them to see. But no one knows me… really knows me. No one sees the lonely little girl who resides in my soul. The little girl whose own mother couldn’t care less about her growing up. The little girl who was left alone, raising herself while her mother drowned herself daily in alcohol and depression. The little girl who lost her daddy when she was six, and who would give anything to have him back. No one sees me.

So here I am at the tender age of twenty-three, living my life as a perpetual party girl. Currently I’m stuck working in my brother’s bar—the bar he and Blake opened together. Trace came back to keep an eye on me after Mother started getting sick, and unfortunately stayed after she passed last year. Since I’m currently not talking to him, I’m pretty sure he put his little minion, Noah Reese, aka bar manager, on “Tatum duty”.

Noah Reese.

He’s hot, there’s no doubt about it. I can’t keep my eyes off of him, actually. With his brown spiky hair, light brown eyes offset by his impossibly dark lashes… he’s gorgeous. And when he comes into the bar with some perfect Barbie draping herself all over him, I get a tad upset. Those girls aren’t right for him. Not that I am. I’m not right for anyone. Sure, I have my boyfriend, but I’m not in love with him and actually, he’s kind of a jerk.

So if Noah wants to keep an eye on me, that’s fine. I
definitely
don’t mind. But I hope he doesn’t have any plans to save me from my life of self-destruction because in order to save me, he will have to see me…

And I’m never going to let that happen.

Perfect.

That’s me.

That’s the only acceptable way to be, according to my father. I loathe the man. There was never any love from him growing up. Just lecture after lecture about how anything less than perfect was intolerable. Perfect grades. Perfect manners. Perfect athlete. Perfect SAT scores. Perfect college. Now, I have to get into the perfect med school. I would like to tell him what a perfect asshole father he is, but I won’t. It takes too much energy to argue with him. I learned this lesson at a very young age. He wasn’t always this way, but after Mom died he changed and I was forced to change with him.

The only little bit of reprieve I get is working in Trace’s bar. No expectations there. In addition, I have recently acquired another job. Trace asked me to keep an eye on his little sister, Tatum.

That girl…

She’s outta control. Drunk and disorderly every goddamn night. Her and her loser boyfriend. He’s such a dick to her… it takes everything in me to not knock his ass out. I can’t even stand to be in the same room with them, but I told Trace I would watch out for her because there’s just something about her.

I can’t help it. She’s breathtaking… long black hair and light blue eyes with one of the most beautiful smiles I’ve ever seen. But, she’s also like a lost little girl who needs help.

I see the façade… the front she puts up for other people. And I recognize her pain, no matter how good she is at trying to cover it up. She’s clearly hiding something, I know it. So I watch her closely, never really saying much, hoping that one day she’ll let me in, but watching her lead her life down the dangerous path she’s on right now isn’t going to be easy.

I have a feeling I’m about to find myself swept away by the hurricane that is Tatum O’Connell.

First of all, a big, big thank you goes to my hubby, of course. Thank you so much for listening to me talk about these characters as though they really exist and for not looking at me like I’m crazy when I get super excited about them. Your support and confidence in my writing has given more strength that you will ever know. YOU are my Blake. Forever and always. Thank you. I love you so much.

My girls. My muses. Thank you. Your crazy antics provide me not only with
a lot
comic relief, but serve as great writing material for Nycole, Kyndall, and Rylie. As with the last book, I hope that you keep these memories close to your heart as I try to catalog the little things you do on a daily basis. I love you all so much and hope you are proud of your portrayal in Alex and Blake’s stories. Because I sure am.

Jena Eilers. Thanks, Rock!

Jennifer Roberts-Hall. Thank you so much for taking the time to edit my stories. I love that I have you and your wisdom in my corner. I love that you just
get
Alex. I love that your knowledge of her helps me so much to tell her story the way it needs to be told. And…I love you. Thank you so much for everything my friend.

Natasha Tomic. Ahh! I love you! Sooo much. You are such an amazing person and I hope you realize how special you truly are. Thank you for your support and advice, your pimpage, and your love for these characters. And, of course, thank you for your help with the most important scene in the book, among many other things related to this story. You helped me weave a truly incredible story that I am so proud of. Thank you!

Lisa Paul. My sista from another mista. Thank you for making me laugh…constantly. I love you! You, my dear, are an amazing writer and I can’t wait to see where this journey takes both of us. Thank you for your pure genius ideas while running through the storyline and beta read. Your additions made this story everything I hoped it would be. Smooches.

Amy Burt. Thank you, once again, for beta reading for me. You are so amazing! You have a great eye and you caught things that made me laugh when you pointed them out. I sincerely hope you understand that I will be giving you every single piece of work I produce in the future. You were my first reader ever and your love and support for the book gave me the courage to write another one. Thank you so much…for everything.

Jena Eilers. LOL! Gotcha! Well, friend, another one down. Thank you for everything. I know you can probably recite the story line for line by now, because I’m pretty sure you’ve read it enough to do so. Thank you for not only your support, but your advice as well. I know you will always be truthful, whether about writing storylines, making career decisions, questioning particular scenes to see if they make sense…everything. I absolutely could not have done this without you. Thank you. YOU are my rock. I love you!

Eric Nelson. Thank you for seeing the bigger picture. Thank you for taking the time to read this story early in development and for guiding me in a direction that I really feel captured what I was trying to get across to the readers. Your critiques and challenges to the story made this book what I wanted it to be. Thank you!

Sarah Hansen. For my beautiful cover. You out did yourself once again! It’s absolutely stunning. Thank you for creating the
perfect
image to showcase the rest of Alex and Blake’s story. You are an amazing artist who produces brilliant covers. Thank you!

Julie Titus.  You are an amazing formatter.  You make my books beautiful.  I love everything you do with them; your visions couldn’t be more perfect for the way Alex and Blake’s stories should be presented.  I love you and your sweet, sweet heart!   Thank you so much for giving me something to be so proud to show off.

Book Bitches, Into the Night Reviews, Totally Booked, Natasha is a Book Junkie, Rock Stars of Romance, Flirty and Dirty Book Blog, Devoured Words, Whirlwind Books, Three Chicks and Their Books – Thank you. You were all such a meaningful part of my journey with Running on Empty and I wanted to say
thank you
to each of you for your love of Alex and Blake as well as their story. Your words of support and inspiration mean more to me than you ever possibly realize and have given me confidence when I found it lacking. Your belief in my writing is something I hold very dear to my heart, and I owe
every one
of you so much for that. Thank you.

My other girls. My crazy crew of lovely ladies who, without a doubt, make my face hurt from laughing so hard. To EVERYONE in ANGTFD! I love you! You ALL are amazing, strong, beautiful, and talented writers! Here’s to each one of our successes. Love you ladies!

And finally, to the readers. Thank you so much for taking a chance on this mother of three and her attempt to start a writing career in order to live her dream. I love each and every one of your posts, your feedback, your emails…every interaction with you reminds me of how lucky I am to have such a great group supporting me. Thank you for giving me courage to live my dream. It’s because of YOU that I’m able to continue to write and I hope to keep making you proud.

L.B. Simmons is a graduate of Texas A&M University and holds a degree in Biomedical Science. She has been a practicing Chemist for the last 11 years. She lives with her husband and three daughters in Texas and writes every chance she gets.