Thief: X (16 page)

“How could she even bite them with no teeth?”

“I have no idea and usually I don’t care. Maybe she’d just try and suck them to death. I don’t have to worry about how she gets her noms but push her far enough and she could rip you to pieces. Ghouls have a low tolerance to ignorance and most choose to stay as brainless freaks because they can’t cope with remembering.”

“You’re not joking are you?” Marshall let me go and I sighed,

“Things aren’t that simple when you start to see the world how it really is.”

“I’m starting to understand that.”

I pushed open my gate,

“Why’s my door open? I have no idea why I spend so much money on spells to keep things out when
everyone
leaves my front bloody door open!” I was shouting now. Wolfie and Sister Succubus looked up from behind the fridge door,

“Did you know you don’t have any food?” My eye twitched,

“Well it’s not like I expected more company was I? Let’s just go to the pub.” A smile came over Wolfie’s face and I dragged Marshall back towards the stairs,

“We really need to talk. I think I’ve figured out why your daughter was targeted. I’m not sure what Clockwork is planning and Madam Cassandra is finding me the information I need to confirm my suspicions. If I’m right it’s gonna change your life, both of your lives.”

I’d had a quick shower and changed into a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt. I stuffed my Glock in its ankle holster and headed for the door. Before I had time to open it, my mom barged through with my brother,

“I’ve left your father for good this time!” Twice in one week. Wasn’t I lucky? “Don’t worry, I have a Women’s Institute meeting and your brother won’t be a problem.” He smiled and waved at me, heading towards his room while he continued to text. My mom looked at me and then Marshall, “Maybe I might get grandchildren before I’m too old to enjoy them.” She whispered in my ear. If she wasn’t my mom, I would have punched her for the comment but life wasn’t fair sometimes.

“Was that your mom?” Sister Succubus said walking out from the living room,

“Unfortunately.” I sighed. I really needed a drink.

As we walked into the Wheel Inn, Kibble gave me a nod and I knew he wanted me to do something,

“Grab a table guys and order. I’ll be at the bar if anyone needs me.”

Kibble placed a lime twist in front of me and smiled,

“On the house.” I raised my eyebrow,

“What do you want?” I swirled the liquid in the glass and looked up at him,

“Can’t I give my favourite person in the whole, wide world a drink on the house?”

“You’re a troll Kibble, and one of the greediest ones I’ve ever known.” He smiled and I felt a waft of sin wash over me as pride filled him at the mention of how greedy he was,

“You look awful, I thought you might need a drink.”

“Really? I don’t think so. Fess up before I have to make you uglier.”

“You wouldn’t...ok you would.” I just sat and stared until I saw him give in, “Father Thomas has a zombie issue in his cemetery.”

“And?” I took a very large swig because Father Thomas had a history,

“Fifty grand if you go sort it out.” Kibble rubbed his hands together,

“Nope.”

“Come on Xan, it’ll take you half hour if that and we’ll have fifty grand for the trouble of it.”

“Nope.”

“Come onnnnnnnn!” Now he was winning,

“Me and the Church don’t mix. They don’t like the fact I can take away sin without repenting and then there’s the whole half demon thing. It’s not a good idea Kibble.” I sighed into my drink. There was more to it than that, but Kibble didn’t need to know.

“Fifty grand Xan and it looks like you need to let off some steam. You can take my spare shotgun to make it even easier.”

“Do I want to know where your other shotgun is?”

“I did those modifications to your booth that you wanted.” I was about to ask if he’d done it exactly how I’d asked when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

I was so twitchy from the last twenty four hours I didn’t even pause when I swung around, grabbed whoever it was by the throat and slammed them on the bar,

“Feeling twitchy Xan?” It was Adram. Of course it had to be Adram,

“What the hell are you wearing?” He didn’t question why I’d just body slammed him into the bar, not that it would’ve hurt him anyway. Instead he did a little twirl that made the silver sequins sparkle in the light,

“This little number? I thought we were making a night of it?” The little number being a very short sequined dress with sparkly red shoes,

“And you thought we were going to see the Wizard?” Adram smiled at my remark,

“And you always say you don’t remember watching the Wizard of Oz. Seriously though Xan, you’re really jumpy tonight. Do you want to go spar? It won’t take me long to change.”

“No, it’s ok.” I looked at Adram’s face and saw how disappointed he’d be if I’d have said yes,

“I’ve tried to give her a job to do. Nice and quick, but she won’t do it.” Kibble just had to interrupt,

“It’s for Father Thomas.” I said into my glass,

“Urgh, I know you’re still cross with him but it wasn’t his fault…”

“Cross? I’m livid Adram!” The glass broke in my hand,

“I’m gonna start charging you for glasses soon.” I shot Kibble the look of death,

“Me and the Church don’t mix. Full stop, the end, drop it!”

“It’s not like you’ll be physically setting foot in the church is it? It’s the cemetery and you and the dead seem to have somewhat of an affinity.” Adram did have a point I suppose,

“Plus its fifty grand.” Kibble added,

“If you don’t let out some of this pent up aggression you’re going to blow and who knows who’ll be in the firing line.”

“Ok.” I sighed,

“Really? That was too easy. Are you drunk?” Adram peered at me like I’d grown another head,

“Maybe blowing the head off a zombie will help. Although if I accidentally blow Father Thomas’ head off it’ll be both your faults.”

“I’ll go keep everyone occupied.” He smiled and minced towards Marshall and the others.

Ten minutes later I was standing in front of Havensbrook Cemetery’s gates. The church stood like a gothic sentinel standing guard over the grave stones. I’d winced when Kibble took his spare shotgun off the wall. It was an old English farmer’s shotgun that you had to crack in half to load the cartridges. I had two shots, not that I’d need the second. Zombies were gooey, like snot mixed with mud. I took a deep breath and opened the gates.

Most people thought graveyards were eerie at night but I always saw them as calming. Maybe Adram was right, I did have an affinity with the dead. Or maybe I just knew that it was the dead that were walking about that caused the issue and it was the one groaning that I was here to
sort
. I walked up to it and sighed,

“It’s time for you to go back to the grave.” The woman groaned. I didn’t always relish what I had to do and this was a prime example. There wasn’t much skin left on the woman and her clothes had been shredded with age. The groan hadn’t been from any remaining vocal cords but from the air gushing from what was left of her body.

I aimed the shotgun at her head and pulled the trigger. Her head splattered backwards and her body fell to the ground. I always felt a little sorry for zombies. They didn’t ask to get reanimated and yet they were powerless to stop it. I’ve even know stupid kids accidently raise one on Halloween by pure coincidence. Cremation seriously was the way to go.

I was pondering how to tell Marshall that his life was a lie when I heard a twig snap behind me. I was sure Kibble had said zombie and not in the plural. I spun around and came face to face with Father Thomas. Great, just great.

“I didn’t think you’d come.” Father Thomas smiled. He was the same as ever. His brown hair was short and ruffled. He wasn’t the typical Father and had more a look of nerd than of religious superiority. He peered at me through his glasses and I saw the wrinkles around his eyes. He was older and probably no wiser,

“You offered Kibble money. Enough you knew he wouldn’t refuse and talk me into it. About that…” He threw an envelope at me and I caught it. Inside was stuffed with money,

“You can count it if you want.”

“I
should
trust a man of the cloth. Although I would like to know why you planted a zombie in your own cemetery?” Father Thomas’ face went bright red, busted!

“How did you know?”

“Oh come on! It hasn’t rained in weeks. The ground is rock solid and there’s no fresh graves. Zombies have a hard enough time digging themselves out of the ground and make a complete mess. There’s no holes. Plus there’s the red clay on her feet…” I kicked her limp foot to illustrate my point, “…completely different soil to what you have here.”

“You’ve never been stupid.”

“And yet you
excommunicated
me!” Years of bitterness and anger spewed up, “I was fourteen. My mom cried for weeks because she didn’t know how to tell her friends I couldn’t go to church anymore. That I wasn’t welcome in a house of God. You did that. You made me lose my faith!” I marched past him before I used the last cartridge on him,

“Back to that again?” I swung around and punched him. He flopped to the ground like a rag doll. It took him a moment to realise his arse was on the ground and then he clutched his nose that was definitely broken,

“Again? I saw you once, a year later because I couldn’t cope with my mom’s crying anymore. I needed to know why and do you remember what you said?”

“It’s better than being dead.” He mumbled into his hand trying to stop his bleeding nose,

“You have no idea what my life was like back then and you were wrong. You helped convince me of the complete opposite.” I know he wanted to say more but I stormed off.

I wasn’t interested in the excuses. He’d made his choice and I’d made mine. There was no going back. I had to keep moving forward or I wouldn’t be sane enough to remember anything.

Kibble was right, it hadn’t taken me long to off the zombie and I threw the envelope at his head when I sat on the bar stool.

“Next time the answer's no, regardless of the amount of money offered.” I slid his shotgun across the bar and he cringed,

“The bat hooker is here. I’ve put her in your booth. The others haven’t even noticed you’ve been out thanks to Adram’s table dancing.”

I looked over and saw Madam Cassandra waiting, impatiently picking at her nails. It looked like she had the information I needed,

“If she hears you call her that she’ll probably eat you.”

“She’s a vampire, of course she’s heard me and I wouldn’t mind her having a little nibble.” I rolled my eyes and headed towards her,

“It’s about time. Do you know the favours I’ve had to pull in to get this information for you?”

“No, but I’m sure you’re gonna tell me.”

“I don’t like to be indebted to anyone, Xan. Here.” She practically threw the file at me, “What are you looking for anyway?”

Madam Cassandra had done a good job, I gave her that much. Most of the information matched Marshall’s file but now I also had family photos. I was right that all the girls had familiar traits and when I looked at their parents my heart sank. It was so apparent I wanted to kick myself. Stupid, stupid, stupid! Every single one had either a mother or a father that was a changeling. I didn’t know what disturbed me more; the fact I was so stupid or that Cain had actually helped me for the first time ever.

“I gather you’ve found something useful after my evening of blackmail?”

“Unfortunately.” I sighed. All I had to do now was get Marshall to believe me,

“You better hope my girl is alive and well…”

“Or what?” I felt my eye twitch,

“I’ll decimate you and everyone you hold close, starting with that cowboy of yours.” Why,
why
, did everyone call Marshall my cowboy?

“He’s not
my
anything! I suggest you leave now before I turn you to ash.” Madam Cassandra’s teeth lengthened and she hissed,

“You’re no threat to me Xan, I could break your neck before your next breath!”

“And I could fill you with enough steel you’ll be ash on the wind,
Cassandra
.” I locked eyes with her but the sound of a bullet entering the barrel of Kibble’s customised shotgun under the table made her break eye contact.

“You wouldn’t
dare
!” She hissed,

“Why not? I don’t like being threatened and that’s exactly what’s been happening this week. So, I think it’s time I fought back. Starting with you.”

“I’ll remember this.” She gracefully left the booth as only a vampire could, and glided out the door.

I sighed to myself as I looked over the files again, hoping I was wrong, but I knew in my gut I wasn’t. I now knew why these girls had been targeted, why Marshall’s daughter had been targeted but I still had no idea what Clockwork wanted with them. I felt myself staring into space as my brain pondered what the connection was. I doubted Clockwork had killed any of them because he’d have left the bodies to be found to taunt me, which meant he was saving them for something. There wasn’t anything of any astrological importance coming up, supernatural or natural. I needed the Kodak, or someone that had access to it.

“What’s up buttercup?” I was suddenly pulled from my thoughts by Adram, who’d wiggled his sequined arse opposite me,

“I need you to look in the Kodak.”

“Urgh, whhhhhhhhhhhy?” He face planted the table and bashed his head a couple more times for effect,

“You know why! The Kodak has every dark ritual inscribed in it. I need you to see if there’s anything that requires elven half breeds with changeling parents.”

“You have to be kidding me? Urgh.” Adram faked a faint and slid under the table,

“Come on Adram. You’re the only one that can even get remotely close enough to look.”

“He’s the Dark Lord Xan. He hates me!” He mumbled from under the table,

“He can’t hate you that much if he still allows you to dress him.” The top of his head poked over the table,

“That’s because I have fabulous taste…”

“Impeccable…” I smiled as he rose from the depths of despair he’d made himself under the table, “…you could be a hero if you do this.” He looked at me and grinned,