Authors: James Newman

Ugly As Sin (27 page)

BOOK: Ugly As Sin

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AH: You recently shared something with me that you thought your fans would like to know...a juicy bit of news regarding your former employer, Lance K. McDougal III? Can you talk about that?

NB:
Gladly. Last month, the Global Wrestling Association’s C.E.O. was arrested for securities fraud and obstruction of justice. Insider trading stuff. I hear he’s facing up to three years behind bars. But it gets better. I just found out that the prick’s been hit with a class-action lawsuit by no less than a dozen young ladies on his payroll. Sexual harassment.

Karma is a bitch.

AH: Last but certainly not least, anything you’d like to say about Leon? Do you miss him?

NB:
Sure. I didn’t know him for long. But he got murdered trying to help me. I’ll never forget my “number one fan.” I’d like to think I could have helped him get clean. I know the little freak would have done anything to make me happy. That would have made me happy.

AH: Nick, I want to thank you for taking the time to chat with me today. Always a pleasure.

NB:
Pleasure’s all mine, Andy. There’s so much more I have to tell you, though. You thought the stuff with Balfour was insane? Wait till you hear about the KKK shitheads, and this crazy-ass cult I pissed off without even trying too hard...

AH: I can’t wait to hear about this!

NB:
Problem is, my contract with James [Newman] says I can’t talk about it in print until it hits his next book.

AH: Damn it, man. That was just wrong.

NB:
I said I couldn’t talk about it in print. But you’re a professional, I figure you know how to keep your trap shut. I don’t see any reason why we couldn’t wrap this up right now, and I’ll tell you all about it over a beer.

AH: Make it more than one. Let me buy, and you’ve got yourself a deal.

NB:
My turn to ask you a question, Andy...why the hell are we still sitting here?

Andrew Holland

Midnight, North Carolina

August 1, 2013

Andrew Holland
is the bestselling author of
Wolf Moon
,
Slow Burn
, and
House On Harding Street
. He lives in eastern Tennessee with his daughter Samantha and a general distrust of humanity.

Holland recently survived a real life horror story of his own, which you can read all about in the book
Animosity
(by James Newman).