When Love Comes to Town (13 page)

“You’re becoming a bit of a regular.”

Look who’s talking. Stop fooling yourself, Neiley Nook, you’re glad to see him and he knows it. Let him rabbit on a while and then steer the conversation toward his little bachelor pad. “What videos d’you have, old-timer?” That’d be a good opener. “I’m horny as hell!” That’d be sure to give poor old Sugar a heart attack. Jesus, look at him, yapping away like an excited schoolkid. Of course he’s excited, he knows that in fifteen minutes you and he will be driving to Clontarf in his sex machine.

“You look like a little lost boy with your hair wet.”

Tell him that you took your cap off in the hope of catching pneumonia. Tell him how empty you feel tonight. Wouldn’t he just love to become a confidante?

“Neil, sorry about the phone calls, I didn’t realize they’d cause you such hassle.”

Grin politely.
Just don’t do it again, Sugar, or you’re dead meat. And don’t be driving past my house late at night hoping for a chance meeting. It’s pathetic, I should know. Oh great, bulging wallet’s out and he’s buying another round. A belated birthday drink, he says. Feeling better now, maybe this world isn’t so bad after all. The headlines. Radio star feels merry after two pints. More like, gay radio star feels randy after two pints. But, Sugar, perhaps you should know, if that guy in the T-shirt walks through that door, you’re history.

“You’re certainly knocking them back tonight.” Uncle Sugar’s wallet reemerged.

Yeah, what d’you expect? I have to get drunk to face your sad little pad. Cut the crap, Sugar, let’s go out to your car, before I start to cry. I’m in a mess, Sugar, can’t you see? You’re the only one in the whole world who’s in love with me. Sad, isn’t it? Worse than that, it’s pathetic.

“I love the watch, is it new?”

Any excuse for a grope. Fondle my skinny wrist, tickle my hand, I don’t care, it feels nice. Wish I could fall in love with you, Sugar, it would save so much hassle. But I couldn’t, not in a million years. Life is funny, isn’t it?

“D’you fancy coming back for a cup of coffee?”

Phew, thought you’d never ask. But not so fast, agree reluctantly. There are roles to be acted out here, games to be played.

Maybe I’ll play the game Trish played with Gary when they first met. Coy and shy and the oh-I’m-so-innocent face. Ah fuck, can’t be bothered. A little nod. Okay, I wouldn’t mind a cuppa. Look at the face on him, he can’t believe it. Poor old Sugar, he’s going to burst a blood vessel. Finish the pints and let’s hit the road.

Sugar slipped another tape into the VCR and sat back in his armchair.

Oh Jesus, he’s looking over again. Pull your T-shirt right down over your weapon. There, he won’t see much now. “Hey, Sugar, d’you hear about the sexy bullfighter? He died on the horn.” Ha, ha, ha, very funny, aren’t I? Would you look at the collection of pornos he has? No wonder he looks worn out. What does he do? Sit in here every night? Forget about Sugar and concentrate on the action. Oh God, it’s amazing.

“D’you want a hand there, Neil?”

Would you fuck off. No, don’t say it, just throw him a disdainful look and shake your head. Set the ground rules. You keep to yourself, Sugar, and I’ll keep to myself.

“There’s some tissues there.”

Sleazeball, would you just go and pull yourself and stop gawking over here? Is there anything sacred anymore? My God, look at what they’re doing! Elastic limbs! And that guy looks a little like Ian! Oh Jesus, tissue quick!

Now what? Don’t look over at Sugar. God, his sound effects are repulsive. Feel dirty now. And guilty. All those video stars have mums and dads, brothers and sisters. How in the name of God do they perform in front of cameras? They all look stoned. Twosomes, threesomes, foursomes. Jesus, it’s disgusting really. And depressing. What the hell am I doing here? Sounds like Sugar’s reached his climax. Finish the coffee, one smoke, and then tell him he’s bringing you home. You don’t belong to this underworld. No, you’ll have a big wedding in Blackrock one day. And at your stag party, a male kiss-o-gram will burst into the pub and sit you down on his knee. “Everyone knows about you, Neil,” he’ll say, and all the lads will be doubled over in hysterics.

“Fancy another cup of coffee?”

Shake your head. Listless now. Maybe everybody does know. Gary kept looking at you when he was talking about the radio show.

“You can stay the night here if you want.”

Shake your head again. Could think of nothing worse, Sugar. Stand up as you put your jacket on. Subtle hint. Oh God, the noise he’s making chewing that biscuit. That’s what comes of living alone. No mammy to say, “Stop eating with your mouth open, Sugar.” That must be his mammy in that photo on top of the telly. All the time watching her son, the king of porn. And that must be Sugar there, at his confirmation. In short trousers! The state of the outfit. But he wasn’t a bad-looking kid, whatever happened him since.

“There’s a great view of the sea out this window during the daytime.”

Look out the window into the blackness. How interesting. C’mon, Sugar, let’s get the show on the road. Oh no, don’t tell me he’s going to try and get romantic again. Get your hand off my shoulder, you disgusting old pervert. Never know what I’d catch off you. Yuck, he hasn’t even washed his hands!

“D’you want another biscuit?”

Have some candy, children. Shake your head and shrug his hand off your shoulder. Wouldn’t eat one if you paid me.

“Right, let’s hit the road.”

Everyone had gone to bed when Neil got home. He told his parents he was in, slipped one of the family home videos into the VCR, and lay across the sofa. He fast-forwarded to the part he wanted to watch. Himself at twelve years of age, sitting proudly on his new BMX bike, about to head off with Gary and Tom for a ride. The grinning faces, looking as innocent as the day they were born, cushioned from the confusing world that awaited them. No one could ever have guessed what would happen that summer in Donegal when Gary had gone on holidays with Neil’s family. He and Neil had to share a bed. And before they fell asleep, Gary started to play nighttime games. “Pretend it’s a girl who’s touching you. See how still you can lie. Stop giggling. Now you do it to me.” Innocent excitement under the sheets. The next day both boys blushed whenever they saw each other. The encounter was never mentioned again. Sometimes Neil wondered if it had ever happened at all.

The living room door opened and his dad stuck his head in.

“Ah, just the man I want to see,” his dad said, tucking his dressing gown in underneath him as he sat down on the arm of a chair. “What’re you watching?” he added, glancing around at the television.

“Ah, just some of the old videos,” Neil replied, sitting up and flicking the TV off, thinking of the quagmire he would have been in if he had taken Uncle Sugar up on his offer of a loan of some videos.

“I was talking to Charlie Dunne, you know the pal of mine who owns the civil engineering firm?”

Neil nodded, knowing exactly what was coming next.

“Yeah, well, he says he can fix you up with a bit of summer work.”

“Oh, great.” Neil tried to infuse his voice with interest.

“It’ll give you a taste of what you’re going into.”

Neil rolled his tongue around his mouth, struggling to resist the bait. His dad was always doing things like this, making plans for him that he knew were contrary to Neil’s wishes. It was his way of provoking the conflict that he wanted resolved. In typical family fashion, a cloak of silence had fallen over the matter since the day Neil broke the news about wanting to study art. But it was constantly bubbling beneath the surface, detectable in the worried glances he sometimes caught his mum and dad sneaking in his direction when he was eating or watching the TV.

“And it’ll give you a few bucks to put toward your college fees.”

“Yeah,” Neil answered, chewing the nail of his index finger nonchalantly.

“Oh, Becky-what’s-her-name phoned for you earlier.”

“Did she?” Neil’s face perked up.

“I think she said she’d phone again, you better ask your mother.”

Neil shifted uncomfortably when his dad turned and stared at him. “Tell me, are you and Becky an item?”

Neil felt his face redden. His dad had never asked such a direct question about his love life before this. But the no-go zone was obviously being breached at his mum’s behest. The pair of them had probably spent the whole evening agonizing over their son’s unusual romance.

“Well, we were before she went to France.” Neil tried to sound jocular in his reply.

“Well, just take one bit of advice from your old fella… Never mess around with a girl’s heartstrings.” His dad tried to make it sound like he was being lighthearted. Neil clenched his fist in frustration. It was all so ridiculous. What a day for his dad to pick to start advising him on how to treat the fairer sex. Did he really know that little about his son?

“Hmm.” Neil nodded.

His dad rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “Is everything okay, Neil?” he asked with uncustomary tenderness.

“Yeah,” Neil said stiffly, maintaining his calm exterior. Inside he felt a strong urge to reveal all, gush it out onto his dad’s shoulder. Be his little boy again.

“It’s just…” His dad lowered his embarrassed gaze. “Your mother and myself, we’ve noticed that you haven’t been in the best of form recently.”

Neil swallowed the lump in his throat. “I think it must be the exams and all that,” he stammered, a slight waver in his voice. Now he really wanted to clasp his arms around his dad and cry his heart out.

His dad stood up and ruffled Neil’s hair. “They’re done now, no point in worrying about them anymore.” Neil could sense the tone of victory and relief in his dad’s voice. He could go back up to bed now and report to his wife that he was right after all, that it was the exams. But she would know better.

“Oh, and some other friend of yours phoned as well.”

“Who?”

“Someone called Eddie.”

“Eddie?” Neil wrinkled his nose in puzzlement.

“Well he asked to speak to Jackie then, so you better ask her who it was.”

Then it dawned on Neil who it was. The one and only Daphne. No wonder his dad’s voice had a slight hint of bemusement.

“Is Jackie in bed?” Neil asked, steering the conversation away from Daphne.

“Ah, she’s been in bed for hours, she was exhausted,” his dad said, going toward the door. “She has a long journey ahead of her tomorrow.”

Neil felt a sharp dart of pain. The events of the day had pushed his sister’s imminent departure from his thoughts.

“Time you were hitting the hay yourself, isn’t it?” his dad added, glancing at his watch.

“Yeah, I was just about to go.”

“’Night then.”

“’Night, Dad.”

As soon as his dad left the room, Neil closed his eyes and threw his head back in anguish. Things were getting complicated.

A
s they drove up to the airport terminal, the enormous dark outline of an airplane loomed overhead, making a deafening roar as it soared into the night sky. Neil leaned out of the car window to watch the red flashing taillights grow smaller and smaller in the distance. Alongside him in the backseat, Jackie was making her hundredth last minute check of her hand luggage.

“Passport, tickets, money…” she muttered.

“Hairbrush,” his dad joked.

“Ssssh!” Jackie hissed, and Neil’s dad caught his eye in the mirror and winked conspiratorially.

“Well, if you’ve forgotten anything, it’s too late to go back for it now.” Their mum was the voice of reason. Jackie gave another panicky squeal as their dad turned the car into the short-term parking lot.

Neil smiled when he spotted Liam, lurking behind a pillar, way off down at the other end of the lengthy departures concourse. He was smoking a cigarette, his scruffy rucksack leaning against a video games machine. As planned, Neil pretended he had to go to the bathroom so he could give Liam the ticket Jackie had had for safekeeping.

“Thanks, man,” Liam beamed, flicking his long hair back from his face and slipping the plane ticket into the top pocket of his faded denim jacket.

Neil grinned. “Your name is dirt in our house.”

“Do they know I’m here?” Liam winced, his eyes open wide.

“Of course they do, but they’re pretending they don’t,” Neil said and Liam smiled.

“How’re you feeling, man?” Liam asked.

“Okay,” Neil answered and saw Liam eyeing him thoughtfully. There was something soothing, almost Christlike about his hair, his beard, his smile, that left Neil feeling totally at ease. Maybe Liam was the one to talk to. But, of course, he was going away, like everyone else who meant anything to him. Deserting him for his crisis summer.

“Fancy a pint?” Liam asked, handing Neil a cigarette.

“We’d never have time,” Neil said, leaning forward to catch the flame of Liam’s lighter.

“Course we will,” Liam drawled, slinging his rucksack up onto his back and loping gazelle-style past the lines of people waiting to check in their luggage and into the bar.

Jackie came rushing in before the froth had settled on their pints. She shrieked with nervous laughter when she spotted the pair of them.

“Give us a swig of that,” she said, taking a long gulp out of Liam’s pint.

“Where’s the old pair?” Neil asked.

“Brendan, if I don’t get a cup of coffee soon, I’ll pass out,” Jackie said, doing an exaggerated imitation of their mum.

“You’ll have time for one,” Liam said, going up to the bar to get a pint for Jackie. Neil and Jackie were alone. Jackie slipped the silver chain that was hanging around her neck out from beneath her T-shirt.

“Look what she gave me,” she giggled, holding the miraculous medal out for Neil to inspect.

“Holy Josephine.”

Jackie leaned forward and cupped Neil’s hands in her own. “See ya in September then, Gladys.”

“Yeah.” Neil lowered his gaze.

“We’ll be going to college together,” she enthused, squeezing his hands in delight. “It’ll be brilliant.”

But Neil was subdued.

Jackie moved closer so their faces were almost touching. She waited for the latest announcement over the PA system to finish before she spoke.