01. When the Changewinds Blow (28 page)

It was the Jewel of Omak, and it was shining. It was such a startling, unexpected thing that she frowned and stared at its reflection-and was caught by its beam. Suddenly she was immobile, unable to move or react, and the magic jewel spoke to her mind.

You are now pursuing a course contrary to the interests of Boolean as well as yourself,
the jewel told her.
As per my instructions in this eventuality, I must take independent rectification actions. Henceforth you will see yourself clearly as you have made yourself. Henceforth, the drug action will be negated. I will take the appropriate biochemical measures to insure that this brings clear thinking and not suicidal depression but you will not like yourself. What you do for your own appearance and self is not my concern, but I will now intervene. You now have the means. You have had the means for some time. You will proceed to carry out Boolean's wishes. The trip to the university is optional, but you will no longer be permitted to act in a manner not calculated to bring you eventually to Boolean's presence. If you do not do this then I will take command. Boolean requires only your body, not your soul. Protection of the body and its delivery to Boolean alve is the only directive. Demonstration.

She suddenly felt as if she were falling down a deep well, swirling around in the water, falling, falling. . . .

And then she saw again, but not as she had ever seen before. The image was low, somehow, and it was two-dimensional, slightly distorted, with the middle of things seeming close up and then everything else going away in the distance on both sides. It was a washed-out, strange-looking, ugly Vision of herself in the mirror, but she could still see her face, distorted by the contorted lens, if she looked up. It was all she could do. She felt disembodied, a mind without a body, only a single, imperfect eye. There was no pain, no pleasure, no sensation at all.

"Now you see," said a strange, horrible, lifeless voice from her own lips. "My energy comes from the soul and the spirit of the bearer. I do not take much; you never miss it, but it bonds us together. The jewel and the bearer are one."

There was a dizzying sensation as her body turned and the single image whirled for a moment before stabilizing, although it was a bit shaky an image. Now they were in the apartment, now the lab. She turned and walked up to the three-way mirror and her entire body was reflected back to her.

Seeing herself clearly and objectively for the first time in a long while was a shock. Not that she didn't know; until now, it somehow hadn't been something she cared about. Her hair had grown back in well; it was still short but it was now substantial and more or less at an asexual length for this culture. Still, it seemed a lot longer than it should have considering how long it took hair to grow out.

But, lord! Was she
fat!
She hadn't really looked in this mirror in a very long time. Mostly, she hadn't wanted to. Her . grossly fat-swollen breasts hung down over a massive beer belly; her arms and legs were very thick, and she had an ass the size of Chicago. Her face, too, showed the weight, and she didn't have to look down much to show a double chin. And this had started with the same body that had created Charley.

It was as if everything within her that was pretty and gentle and nice had gone with Charley, leaving her with the grotesque remains.

"See what you have made of yourself," her body said in that same inhuman whisper. "The same body that your friend has kept beauteous beyond compare. The same body that made three-meter jumps to sneak in here that night and was agile and strong enough to climb drains and move silently across a sloped roof. You are the same one hundred and fifty-seven centimeters, but you weigh one hundred and eleven kilograms. This body grows weary climbing the stairs."

The figures were a shock.
One hundred and eleven kilograms-let's see, each was two point two pounds. . . . My God! I weigh over two hundred and forty pounds and I'm just five-two!

"No, I weigh that. You weigh under four hundred grams," said her body.

I-I'm in the Jewel of Omak!
she suddenly realized.
I'm in the jewel, and whatever thing that dwelled here is now in my body!

"Yes, quite correct," responded the image. "You thought of me as a computer, which was all right, so long as everything went well. I influenced you and your friends as needed to accomplish the primary mission. I am no computer, Samantha Buell. That is of your world, not of mine or my master's. I am what you would call a demon."

Oh, God! A demon!
Visions of Hell and creatures with horns appeared in her mind from her old upbringing.
What have I done? Have I lost my soul?
Suddenly she felt anger.
You! You convinced Charley to do what she did-because it was the only way to get the money!

"She might have done it anyway. She was inclined that way. I think you know your friend less well than you think. I merely made it easier for her to decide. Just as I used what little strength I had for your charge at Boday, so it would strike perfectly to knock her down. Just as I put the idea in your head for the love potion, since we needed an ally. Just as I put how to do it in Boday's mind. I did not mind your lapse into decadence so long as there was nothing else to do, so long as resources were building up. I fear we demons have rather a taste for decadence. But I am bound to enforce my master's will. That is why I am in the jewel and he is sitting comfortably in Masalur. I do not even particularly like him, but greater power always commands lesser power in all things. I am a lesser power to him and so must obey. You are a lesser power to me. Just as I find being in a human body but with such restrictions repugnant-but if I must possess you, then I must. But I would rather we had an understanding."

You-you have been controlling all of this?

"Naturally, up to a point. Did you think under the circumstances that you could have even survived unaided here for long? I made certain mat, when he discussed betraying you, Zenchur spoke Akhbreed, to warn you. When you proved too immature and nervous to act or even plan a course of action, I waited. Do you really believe that one of Zenchur's experience would use the jewel while facing a mirror unless he somehow was prevented from considering that possibility? Do you think you would have had the presence of mind to duck?"

But you let him betray Charley and kidnap her! You could have stopped it!

"Yes, but I have no interest or instructions on Charley. She was not anticipated. Zenchur was a sincere hope, and so long as he did not betray
you
there was no reason to act. When he did, I intervened. Now I must intervene again. Do you like your body now?"

You know I don't! I'm huge! Ugly!

"The outside merely manifests the inside. You have let Boday take over and dominate your mind. You have become complacent with perversity, you have lost your sense of self and purpose. You have betrayed your friend who sacrificed for you. You did not lose your soul. You gave it away."

It was Boday!

"Boday can do nothing that you do not allow her to do. This time could have been put to productive use. You started to do so, but you did not really want to, and at the first sign that learning was work or the first mistake in learning you seized as an excuse to give it up. It was incomprehensible to me that one who would risk everything and sacrifice all to save a friend would have so little sense of self-worth. Your friend was willing to voluntarily lie and be servile to a hundred men or more because she understood that it was the only way to her own goal, to reach Boolean, to get out. To attain something worth attaining, one must sacrifice, do whatever is necessary. She understands that. But you! You never had any goals. You never really succeeded in anything. Charley was the only backbone you ever had, and you used her and wound up dragging her here. Without her, you switched to Boday. Only one thing keeps me from taking complete command, imprisoning you in that bauble and remaining here, possessing your body. Just once, in your whole life, did you have a real goal that did not concern yourself. Just once, you put aside all thoughts of self and risked everything for someone else. I provided the physical stamina and the knowledge and skills needed, but it was your will that used it. I did not send you to save Charley from Boday. That is not my affair. I provided the resources, but you provided the will."

Sam felt very ashamed of herself right then and there. She wanted to cry, but jewels don't cry, or feel any sensations at all.
What would you have me do?
she asked the demon. "The object was to gain the financial resources to undertake the journey and perhaps acquire some of the skills needed. You have it. In spite of Boday's lavish attempts at spending it down. How long do you think it has been since you abandoned your friend?"

Total confusion.
I-I don't know. Four or five months, I guess. I suppose the way you talk it's a year.

"It
has
been a year.
Exactly a year today.
Boday in fact is in the process of renewing the lease and taking more rooms for more girls.
You
may not be able to read those papers, but I can read Boday. She has plans to make this permanent. She is the one whose elixirs kept you pleasant but which also induce a massive appetite for sweets. At this weight you will take no other lovers, nor have much energy for ambition. You sleep half the time and the rest you lie around eating and doing whatever she desires. You do not vegetate, you have become a vegetable. You have not left this loft in five weeks, partly because, deep down, you do not want others to see you this way. Boday prepares now for her final coup. She is signing the final papers and leasing a grandiose suite near the Palace into which she will move Charley and the last two girls she did here, which were procured for her use, not as commissions. She is confident now. Then your friend's position will be made-permanent.
She
will teach the others and all the ones who come after her. Soon there will be so much money and power she will be able to eliminate Kligos and the rest."

No! She can't! I wouldn't permit it! I told her about Charley!

"Indeed, you have been very naive. What do you think a love potion does? It directs all of the emotional needs, primitive lusts, whatever, toward a single individual. You fall madly in love with that person-but nothing else changes unless that person changes
her.
You, instead, have given her a free hand. She is protecting you, even from yourself. Do not lovers lie to one another? Do not lovers do something against the other's wishes for what they really believe is the good of the other? That is why I must step in. She must not be allowed to do this thing. This must end now. Either you must end it, or I will. The enemy gathers strength. It builds in secret now, so as not to frighten and unite the Kings of Akahlar, but it builds. When it is strong enough it will move, and millions will suffer, and the fate of all worlds will be decided. You are a player in this matter no matter if you wish to be or not. Many of the soldiers and victims in wars are unwilling and even uncomprehending or uncaring, but they still fight and suffer and die. You are a chess piece in this game. Whether pawn or queen I do not know, but you are none the less important, for even a pawn may capture a king."

I will handle it! I will stop it! I swear to you! I'll kill that bitch!

"No. If you handle it, if you stop it and redirect it, it must be with thought, not emotion. How will you bring Charley back without Boday? How will you access the funds and find the personnel needed and chart the course? She is corrupt. Use her, and prevent her from using you." The demon sighed. "I sense you need some incentives of your own to match your friend's. If you do not act now, your friend is lost. That is the first incentive. Once you recover her you must not be turned again from the objective." Her own brown eyes surveyed her body in the mirror.

"It is fitting, even useful," the demon said, mostly to itself. "The male illusion was for the purposes of disguise but it would not have held up on the trail in any event. It has taken some of my intervention to hold
this
long. But no one, _ absolutely no one, would recognize you now. I give you back your body, until such time as you give me cause to seize it again. But I also give you my curse. I cannot in any way alter your true body and part of my charge is to prevent that from happening, but
this is
your body, and so it will stay, regardless of spell or potion or three weeks in the wastes without food. If need be the fat will be useful in an emergency to convert to muscle, say, but it will return when not needed. This is the way you will see Akahlar, and this is the way Akahlar will see you. A perfect disguise without illusion. Oh, I will give you strength when needed and undo some of the effects en your mind that keep it dull and sleepy, but this is the way you will look-until you stand face to face with Boolean. And you can look at Charley and think of what might yet be, but only if that meeting comes."

No!
she cried from her prison. "Wait!" she finished aloud, in the body. She was back, staring at her reflection in full command of it all, her mind clear. She hated that reflection. She felt the weight, the pressure on her back and ankles. Those huge, sagging, floppy breasts hanging down to a stomach that looked nine months pregnant and wasn't, and a lower body that seemed all rear end. My God, she looked old, too. A lot older.

Still, her mind was clear and the body obeyed. She wasn't gonna be running any races but she felt new strength inside her.

Still, she looked-
gross.
In more ways than one. It would
take
a love potion for anybody to love
this
body. But the demon was correct-she hardly recognized herself. And yet, the demon had been absolutely right. She
deserved
this. Without that damned demon it would have all gone on as scheduled, irreversibly. She was ungainly, obese, ugly-she would have to earn redemption.