1st (Love For Sale) (6 page)

“Remember my promise, too, kitten.  When you leave this arrangement, you’ll be the same as you are now.  Outside of more sexually experienced and trained to please.”

He knew I was considering his option, and it galled me that I could be bought.  “I can’t make a decision like this right now.”  I wasn’t sure I could make a decision like this ever, but at least if I had time I could talk things over with my best friend. 

“I’ll give you twenty-four hours to think it over.  But, kitten?  Don’t make me wait any longer and be sure that you know what you’re agreeing to.  I’ll own your body and mind for those six months.  What you want will no longer enter into the equation.”  The seriousness in his tone made me tremble.  There was no doubt in my mind that he meant what he said.

“Limits.  How do I know what you plan on doing to me before it happens?”  Holy crap!  I was acting like this was a consideration.

“You don’t.  All you know is that I won’t physically scar you and if something is so horrible that you can’t go through with it, I’ll consider your objection.” He stood up and I followed his lead, having no idea what I was doing. “I’ll have my driver take you home.” He turned to me, his hand tangling in my hair, arching my neck back almost painfully.  Those full lips fell on mine and he devoured my mouth.  Our tongues danced together frantically before he pulled back on my hair, breaking the kiss. He pulled a business card out of his pocket, pressing it into my hand. “Twenty-four hours.”

Breathless from his kiss, I almost lost my balance when he released me to walk off.  I followed behind him, lost in a world of confusion.  He stopped in the living room to gather my clothing, then guided me out of the house to where a limousine was waiting.  After opening the door for me he left and that drive home was the longest one of my life.

chapter five

Decision

“Have you lost your fucking mind, Cat?” To say McKayla was against the idea was like comparing a kitten to a lion.  She was so furious her face was bright red.  Not a color that worked well with her pale Irish coloring. “A fucking sex slave!  Twenty-four hours ago you were still a virgin!” Pacing through our small living area, I worried she was about to have heart attack.

“Would you please calm down? I haven’t said yes, yet, but you have to think about what this could mean for our future.  No more worrying about having money for bills, our own business, and hell, we could even take a month off for a vacation.  When’s the last time we went anywhere?”

“Jesus fucking Christ!  Do you have an idea what this man could do to you?  You already said he spanked you, what’s next?  Tying you up and beating the shit out of you?”  She stopped pacing and stood in front of me, staring with an intensity I’d never seen from her before.  “What if he decides to share you with a group of his friends?  It’s not that unlikely, considering the damn show we witnessed.  Who knows what kind of sick, deranged acts he would put you through?”

“I’m sure he wouldn’t ask me to screw his friends.” The fact was I wasn’t sure about anything and the thought of becoming some object he could pass around terrified me.  “I can always make that a limit.”  I still found the word limit strange even as it rolled of my tongue.

“Are you sure about that?  He did say that he’d consider letting you have a few, not that he’d change his mind.  If you ask me, the man is a perverted piece of shit and we’d be better off just staying on the path we’re on.  At least then you can still be your own person.”

McKayla walked over to our refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of cheap wine.  After pouring and downing a glass then strode over to sit on our sofa, which had seen better days.  “I don’t think there’s anything to consider.  This isn’t the right thing to do.” Her demeanor relaxed completely, as if she’d made the choice and there was nothing else to be discussed.

“I love you, Kay, but this is my choice.  Six months belonging to him for a chance to have everything I’ve ever wanted doesn’t seem like a horrible decision.”  I joined her on the couch, not liking that I was about to go against her wishes.  We rarely disagreed on anything, but my situation was pretty unique.

She let out a long, deep sigh, while shaking her head.  “I know this guy was your first, but agreeing to this?  I’m sorry baby, it’s not something I can just sit back and watch you do.  The chances of you getting hurt are just too big.”

“So what are you saying, then?  If I do this you’re going to what, stop being my friend?” I can’t tell you how hurt I was to even say that out loud.  McKayla and I had been through too much for her to even consider something like that.

“Don’t be an idiot.  Of course I’d still be your friend, you just won’t get my blessing for this.  I think it’s fucking stupid, and you’ll more than likely regret it for the rest of your life.” My heart sunk when she started crying.

Pulling her into my arms, I held her tightly, knowing that there was nothing in this world I wouldn’t do to make her happy.  We were more like sisters than best friends, that’s how much she meant to me.  “Damn it, Kay, don’t do this, okay?  I need you to let me make this decision and not feel like I have to choose between it and you.”

“I can’t help it.  I’m terrified this ass wipe will hurt you and I swear to God, if he fucking does I’ll go to jail.” She sniffed and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

I had to laugh at her response, because she probably would kill him if I was hurt.  In her own backwards way she’d just given me permission without even knowing it.  “I’ll buy the gun.”

She laughed tearfully before breaking our embrace.  “Screw the gun. I’ll get a knife so I can make him suffer more.”

I’d seen McKayla fight when push came to shove, and she wasn’t someone you wanted to cross.  She was only five foot six and about a hundred and twenty pounds, but hidden in her frame was a prize fighter.  Her looks were very deceiving, because had she been born into another life she could have passed for a model.  “Deal.”

“So. You’re going to do this, aren’t you?”  I could read the worry behind her whiskey colored eyes and hated telling her my decision.

“That kind of money is just too hard to turn down.”  Outside of physically harming me, there was nothing Seth could do that I couldn’t handle. 

“I still think it’s a mistake, and you better let him know that I’ll destroy him if he crosses any of your lines.” That was a close to an acceptance as I would get from her, so I nodded.

“I promise, if he does something I really don’t like, I’ll take care of him myself.”  I knew I wouldn’t be able to hurt Seth, but giving her some comfort seemed like the right thing to do. I fought back my need to second guess everything about this situation with her, because I knew she’d win the argument if I did. “I don’t know about you but I’m exhausted.  What’s say we get some sleep?”

McKayla reluctantly agreed and we walked back to our bedroom.  The apartment we rented only had one, and we’d had no problem sleeping together.  We talked for a long time in bed before exhaustion won out.  After she’d fallen asleep I dreamed about the life changing decision I was making.  It was part nightmare and part sexual fantasy making for a restless night.

The next morning, I felt like my body had been put through a grueling workout.  My muscles ached terribly, including a certain part of my body that had never been used before.  I took a long, hot bath, and that helped ease some of the kinks. 

McKayla and I talked over breakfast, where she once again tried to warn me about what I could be getting in to.  She’d never done any kinky stuff herself so had no insight to offer on that front.  The truth was while she’d had a couple of lovers, her experience level wasn’t much greater than mine.  The two guys she’d dated had been pretty normal in her opinion.

We took the bus to go pay bills, and brought a few groceries to get us through the next week.  Neither of us were big eaters, even though we cooked for events.  After that boring task was done, we did our daily run and returned to the apartment.  In the back of my mind was the thought that I had to call Seth today, and it somewhat clouded over everything else.

“You might as well call him now.” McKayla prepared salads for our late lunch and apparently she’d been trying to get my attention for a few minutes since she’d placed one in front of me, holding up my fork.  “Your mind is a million miles away.”

“Sorry.  I guess you’re right.  I have no idea what happens next, so it’s kind of freaking me out.” I gave a remorseful smile and walked over to the phone.

My hand shook as I dialed his number.  Waiting for him to answer made me incredibly nervous but when he did I couldn’t force a word from my lips.

“Caitlin?” His voice held that seductive quality with a no nonsense tone.

“Um.  Yeah, it’s me.” I finally managed to speak through my cotton-filled mouth.

“Do you have a decision for me?” He was in full business mode, and there was nothing remotely resembling anything more than an air of superiority in his voice.

“I do.”  I couldn’t make myself say the words.  I wasn’t sure if I was having second thoughts or that this was the moment I knew my life would change forever and I was fighting against what would inevitably be.

His deep chuckle erased the sternness I contemplated over the phone, and it did something to my insides.  “Might I know the result?”

“My answer is yes.”  I spoke the words quickly, jumbling them together before I had no ability to speak them.   It was such a huge relief to just have them out there, maybe even making me feel like I couldn’t take it back after I agreed.

“Very good.  I’ll have my driver pick you up at six tonight so we can discuss the arrangements in detail.  And Caitlin.” He paused, leaving me hanging on to his defragmented sentence impatiently.  “You made the right choice.”  That was it.  He hung up the phone.

I clenched the receiver tightly in my hands, not sure I had, and feeling more nervous now than when I’d picked up the phone to call.  Almost in slow motion, I forced my fingers to relax the death grip and hung it back up carefully.  What the hell had I just agreed to?  I guess I’d find out later tonight.

“Well?” McKayla was staring at me with concern lacing her beautiful face and I wasn’t sure how to answer.

“He’s picking me up tonight to discuss the details.” After last night, I thought he’d made it clear what he expected, so I had no idea what details we needed to discuss.  Obviously McKayla felt the same way because she looked at me in confusion.

“I think it’s pretty obvious what he expects?” Shaking her head, she joined me at the counter digging into her tuna salad.  With her mouth still crammed full, she garbled out some words, and when I returned her confused stare, she chewed and swallowed before speaking again.  “I said he probably expects you to walk in and kneel at his feet.”

“Really?” I hoped like hell he didn’t expect me to walk in his house and do that. 

“Well, yeah.  You know sex slave, kneeling before him, kissing his feet, that’s what they do in those stupid-ass love stories.”

“All I have to say is his feet better be clean.” We both got a good laugh out of that, breaking up the sudden anxiety that I was beginning to feel over this monumental decision.

The rest of the day went by in somewhat of a blur.  I changed outfits three times before deciding on a simple black dress with two-inch heels.  There was nothing fancy about the dress, but at least I wouldn’t feel like a complete loser walking into his movie-star mansion tonight.

The heels helped me feel a little taller.  Since I was only five foot two, I needed all the help I could get.  I put on a small amount of makeup, needed the confidence it gave and left my long hair hanging loose on my shoulders.  Staring at my reflection, I knew this was about as good as it was getting and turned away nervously.  What if he really did expect me to kneel down at his feet tonight?

McKayla walked me downstairs to meet the driver and I hadn’t noticed last night that he was an attractive man.  He probably wasn’t much older than I was, judging by his looks, but there seemed to be a wisdom in his grey eyes well beyond those years. 

“Miss Caitlin.” He smiled warmly, showing a brilliant white smile while holding the door open for me.  Maybe my libido had finally been awakened because if I’d met this guy under different circumstance I would have found him drop-dead gorgeous.

“Remember, if he does anything you don’t like, just call me and I’ll come over to kick his ass.” McKayla hugged me tightly then glared at the driver.  “You better not fucking wreck.”

Instead of looking taken-back by Mckayla’s attitude, the drive just winked.  “Don’t worry.  She’s in good hands tonight.” He was actually flirting with my best friend and obviously she wasn’t immune because the pissed off look dropped right off her face.

I didn’t have time to think about the two of them at the moment, because my stomach was tied in knots.  Sliding into the luxurious backseat of the limo, I eyed the champagne then decided against it.  The last thing I needed tonight was to not be in complete control of my senses.

Last night the driver had kept the partition up between us as he drove, tonight it was down.  I caught him glancing at me in the rearview mirror and attempted a friendly smile.  I’m sure I failed miserably because I really was close to throwing up.

“You’ll be fine.” He pulled out onto the road putting his attention there and I wished I had his confidence. “I’m Joel, and Mr. Corbin has instructed me to tell you that whenever you need transportation to let me know.  I’ll give you my card when we arrive at the mansion.”

“Um.  Thanks.”  I wondered why Seth would offer his driver to me, but with everything else going on, it was the least of my concerns.

“You’re welcome.  I have a feeling you and I will become very good friends.” His tone seemed to be a lot less informal than what I expected an employee to have, but again I just didn’t have it in me to think about anything else.  Who knew how these billionaires expected their staff to act, anyway?

He turned on some classical song, and continued to drive leaving me drowning in my own insecurities.  I crossed my legs, then uncrossed them, fidgeting to get comfortable and getting more nervous by the moment.  This was a stupid idea, and I knew the smart choice would be to ask him to turn around.  I didn’t, and before I knew it, we were pulling up to the security gate then driving through.  I couldn’t help but feel like I was going to prison as the mansion loomed ahead, the dread leaving my already weak stomach churning.

Joel stopped the car and walked over to my door opening it.  I wasn’t getting out and stepping into Seth’s world.  I just couldn’t do it.  “Miss?” His hand outstretched, waiting for me to take it and I shook my head.  I don’t know why I was suddenly terrified, but listening to my gut feelings seemed like the right idea.

When I refused his hand, Joel hunched down, smiling calmly as our eyes met.  “What’s the worst that could happen?” He gave me the same words I’d thought earlier and my mind went on a rampage of thoughts.

“You tell me, he’s your boss.”  I didn’t want to share my ideas of how wrong this could go.  Inching back toward the other door, I knew this was stupid.  Money wasn’t worth selling my soul for.

“I can’t disclose his secrets, but what I can tell you is that I’ve never had a woman leave here unhappy.” His grin turned almost boyish in nature and for some stupid reason I wanted to believe him.  Maybe it was because he seemed so confident, or that his words reminded me of what Seth and I had shared last night.