A Baby Under the Tree (14 page)

He'd even been willing to get a bigger place to live and to purchase a brand-new rocking chair for her to put in the nursery she planned to create.

As Jillian took it all in, she blew out a sigh. Why hadn't she realized that there was far more to Shane Hollister than met the eye, although what met the eye was enough to set her heart soaring and her hormones pumping?

In fact, even though she'd been dragging her feet about getting physically involved with him, she liked sleeping with him and waking in his arms. She even wanted to make love to him again.

And again.

Did all of that mean that she could fall in love with him?

Or maybe she already had.

So now what? she wondered.

The urge to talk to him grew until she had no choice but to act upon it.

He was probably already at his parents' house by now, with his family. Maybe she should call him, discuss her thoughts and feelings over the phone. But a face-to-face conversation would be best.

My folks live in the Woodlands…just off Arbolitos Drive.

Jillian didn't know exactly which house belonged to Mr. and Mrs. Hollister, but she could certainly find the street. And then she could drive up one side and down the other until she spotted Shane's pickup.

There would probably be a party in progress, but she wasn't going to let that stop her. She was going to walk right up to the front door—baby bump and all. Then she would ring the bell and ask to speak to Shane.

He hadn't said much about his family, and she wasn't sure why he hadn't. So she wasn't sure what his family would think of her showing up unannounced, unwed and pregnant. But she didn't care. She needed to talk to Shane and make things right.

She just hoped it wasn't too late.

 

After climbing into his pickup and leaving Jillian's house, Shane had sworn under his breath, ashamed of himself for practically groveling.

Right then and there, he'd been tempted to head back to Brighton Valley, with its clear blue skies and wide-open spaces, where he'd created a new life for himself.

Instead, he drove across town to the Woodlands, turned onto Arbolitos Drive and proceeded until he arrived at his folks' house.

There were a couple of cars parked in front already, as well as two of his nephews playing catch on the lawn. He sat in his truck for a moment or two, watching his brother John's sons.

The boys were getting bigger, Shane noted. It was
nice to see the oldest coaching the youngest. John must be really proud of them.

Deciding he'd sat in the truck long enough, he climbed out of the driver's seat and headed for the house. As he made his way up the sidewalk, he stopped long enough to say hello to the boys and to add, “Good arm, Trevor.”

“Thanks, Uncle Shane. You want to play with us?”

“Maybe later. I have to check in with your grandma first, or I'll be in big trouble.” Then he made his way to the front door and let himself in.

He'd barely entered the living room when his sister Mary-Lynn spotted him.

“Hey, Mom,” she called. “Come quick. Look what the cat drug in.” Then she wrapped Shane in a hug, which he held on to for a beat or two longer than necessary.

For some reason, it felt especially good to have a physical connection with another human being, especially since Jillian had sent him on his way earlier. Not that she'd asked him to leave, but she hadn't done anything to convince him to stay.

“You're certainly a sight for sore eyes,” Mary-Lynn told him, as they stepped apart. “You really should come around more often. We miss you.”

“I missed you, too.” And at that very moment, as the words rolled off his tongue without any conscious thought, he realized they were true.

“So what's new around here?” Shane asked his sister, knowing that she was the go-to girl when it came to
learning the scoop about the comings and goings in the family.

“Well, let's see… Colleen's setting a wedding date— November tenth. And Andy will be heading for Camp Pendleton soon, although I'm not sure when.”

Before Shane could question whether their baby sister was old enough and wise enough to tie the knot, or whether Andy should have considered another branch of the military, his mother entered the room and clapped her hands.

“Shane! I've been hoping and praying that you'd surprise us one Sunday and come home.” Then she wrapped her arms around him in a mama-bear hug, letting him know just how glad she was to see him.

After the welcome-back embrace ended, his mom and his sister headed back to the kitchen, just as Jack, his oldest brother, came into the house from the backyard.

“It's good to see you, little brother.”

“Same here.”

“So what's new?” Jack asked.

Nothing Shane was ready to talk about yet. So he said, “Not much.”

“Are you dating anyone special yet?”

“Nope. I'm too busy riding fence and mucking stalls for that.”

“Sounds like a crappy job, if you ask me. If I were you, I'd much rather be chasing after the bad guys—and dating the ladies.” Jack, who loved his work with the police department, nodded toward the sliding door that led out to the patio. “Come on outside. I'll buy you
a beer and let you know what's been going on at the HPD.”

As Shane followed his brother out to the yard, he thought about the dating question and his lack of honesty.

Of course, he and Jillian weren't what you'd call an item. In fact, after today, they weren't really anything—other than coparents, he supposed.

He'd been a fool to stop by her place earlier, and he'd been an even bigger fool to mention marriage or to hint at them having a life together.

From day one, he'd known that a permanent relationship with Jillian wasn't in the cards—even if he'd wished otherwise.

Jack handed Shane a can of beer, and they made small talk for a while. A few minutes later, their father, who'd been napping, joined them outside. They greeted each other, then talked about the scuttlebutt down at the precinct.

As Shane scanned the yard, watching the kids play tag and the adults crack jokes, listening to the bursts of laughter and the escalating voices, he realized that it would take a special woman to appreciate a Hollister get-together.

Marcia certainly hadn't been able to. And Jillian, who was an only child, too, didn't seem able to handle it, either.

Besides that, Jillian had also experienced the best that life could offer when she'd been married, so how could she ever live happily in a blue-collar world?

She'd be miserable. And Shane would find himself back in that same marital turmoil he'd been in before.

No way would he ever want to live like that again.

“You ready for another beer?” Jack asked, as he dipped his hand into the ice chest.

“No, I'm good for now.” Shane turned back to the game of tag that his nieces were playing on the grass.

“Shane?” his mom called out.

“Yeah?” He turned to face the sliding door, where his mother stood.

He assumed that she wanted him to do her a favor, like carry something heavy outside or reach a bowl in the top shelf of the cupboard.

Instead, she said, “You have company.”

“Me?”
He wondered who knew that he'd be here today, since he hadn't told anyone in the family that he was going to show up.

“Yes,
you,
” she said.

“Who is it?” he asked.

“That's what
I'd
like to know.” His mother crossed her arms and raised her brow. “She's a beautiful blonde who's obviously pregnant. And she's asking for you.”

“Uh-oh,” Jack said. “Sounds like you might have been doing a little more than riding fence and mucking stalls while you were in Brighton Valley.”

Shane might have had some kind of snappy retort if he hadn't been floored by the news that Jillian was here. And it had to be her. Who else did he know who was blond, beautiful and pregnant?

Trouble was, when he went inside the house and headed for the front door, everyone else seemed to follow him like a string of ducklings.

J
illian stood on the Hollisters' front porch, waiting for Shane's mother to call him to the door.

She'd been invited inside, but until she had a chance to talk to him and he issued the invitation himself, she thought it would be best if she waited here.

But when footsteps sounded—a lot of them—she glanced past the entryway and into the living room, where Shane strode toward her, several of his family members following behind.

Certainly she wouldn't have to tell him what she'd come to say in front of an audience, would she?

He wore a slightly bewildered expression, although she had no idea what her own looked like—uneasy? Embarrassed? Contrite? Maybe a little bit of each?

Still, as he approached, she managed a smile. “I…
uh…need to talk to you.” She glanced beyond him—at Mrs. Hollister, as well as a man who could be his brother, and several children.

Shane peeked over his shoulder, at the curious onlookers, then back to her. “Do you want to take a walk around the block?”

“Sure.”

“It might be the only chance we have at some privacy.” Then he turned to his mother and said, “Don't wait for me to get back. Go ahead and eat whenever those steaks are done.”

Then he stepped onto the porch and closed the door behind him, shutting out the audience.

They started down the sidewalk to the curb, then proceeded down the shady, tree-lined street.

“How'd you know where my parents live?” he asked.

“You told me the neighborhood, as well as the street. I took a drive, then looked for your truck. Actually, I knocked at one of the neighbor's houses by mistake, and a lady told me to go next door.”

The sun had risen high overhead, and a breeze ruffled the leaves in the trees, as they continued a casual walk.

“I hope you don't mind that I came by,” she said.

“No, that's fine.”

“It's just that I wanted to apologize to you—in person.”

He pondered her comment for a half beat. “About what?”

“For not being completely open with you about the way I feel. For holding back and for not trusting you.”

His steps slowed, and hers did, too. As he turned to face her, as their gazes met and locked, she braced herself for what she'd driven across town to say.

“I think you'll make a wonderful father for our baby. And I'll be happy to share custody with you. But I plan to nurse her, and so… Well, you can understand why I wouldn't want you to take her away from me or keep her overnight.”

“I never planned to do that. At least, not when she's little. That's one reason why I…” He glanced down at his boots, shifted his weight, then looked back up again. “I guess that's why I suggested that we work something out, where we could… Well, eventually where we could raise her together.”

“You mean move into the same house?” she asked. He'd mentioned marriage, so that's what he must have been thinking.

“I'm willing. But if you're not ready or even interested, I understand.”

“It's not that.” She cleared her throat, hoping to cut through the complicated feelings she was struggling with, then pressed on with the honesty he deserved. “I enjoyed my time at your place in Brighton Valley. You were a perfect gentleman and… Well, you seem to be too good to be true, and that scares me.”

“Why?”

“Because I'm afraid of getting hurt again.”

“I can understand that.”

“Can you? Because I can't. And it doesn't seem fair to you. I mean, my ex-husband was a lying jerk. And
I've been holding you at bay because I'm afraid that you might not be the man I want you to be.”

Shane reached out, caught a strand of her hair, letting it slip through his fingers as though it were spun gold. “You scare me, too. I had a lousy marriage, and my wife never could appreciate my family or my job. Hell, most of the time, she didn't even appreciate
me.
So now I find myself involved with a woman who lives in a world two hours from mine, and she's having our baby.”

“So how can we work this out?” she asked.

“Are you willing to compromise?”

“That's what I came here to tell you. I should have said something earlier, but my fears got in the way, even though you've given me nothing to be afraid of.”

“Are you saying you'd consider marrying me?” Shane asked. “Maybe someday?”

“That's the problem.” She bit her lip, then sought his gaze, his understanding. “Marriage is hard enough when people love each other.”

“And you don't think you could ever love me?”

She tilted her head slightly. “I
do
love you, Shane. I'm not sure when it happened—maybe that night at the hotel. All I know is that my feelings for you continue to grow, and I don't know what to do, other than face them head on.”

 

She
loved
him? Shane couldn't believe his ears. He wasn't the only one wrestling with those feelings, with that mind-spinning attraction.

He reached out and cupped her beautiful face, skim
ming his thumbs across her cheeks, breathing in her lilac scent, basking in her presence. “You have no idea how happy I am to hear that, Jillian, because I love you, too.”

“You do?”

He nodded. “I was afraid you wouldn't be able to accept me and the lifestyle I wanted to provide for you. But if we love each other, maybe we can come up with a compromise that will work out without either of us having to give up our dreams.”

“I'd like that. And while I wasn't sure how this conversation was going to turn out, I did some thinking about possible solutions on my drive across town.”

“So what'd you come up with?”

“Since school is out, and the baby is due in December, there's no reason for me to be in Houston, other than my grandmother. And maybe, if I tell her I'm moving to Brighton Valley and taking the baby with me, she'll consider relocating.”

“No kidding?” Shane had hoped she'd feel that way, yet it had all seemed too much of a stretch.

“I'd have to make some phone calls, but I might be able to do my student teaching at the new high school in Brighton Valley—or even the old one in Wexler.”

If she was willing to compromise, to go to that extreme for them to be together, then he'd do the same for her. “If it doesn't pan out, if you can't get the position, then I'll do whatever I have to do—even if it means moving back to Houston or taking a desk job. I want us all to be together—as a family.”

“It just might work out,” she said. “I'd have some
meetings and classes I'd have to attend at the university sometimes, but not every day. So I can probably commute.”

“I know it'll work out,” he said. “One way or another. We'll find a way.”

Then he lowered his mouth to hers, sealing the commitment they intended to make with a kiss that began sweet and precious, then deepened into something soul stirring and filled with promise.

When they came up for air, he drew her tight, amazed at his good fortune.

“I don't know when I've ever been so happy,” he said.

“Neither do I.”

“I don't know about you,” he said, “but Christmas came early this year.”

“Speaking of Christmas…” She broke into a radiant smile. “There's going to be three of us by then. Can you believe it? We'll be writing letters for Santa and leaving cookies under the tree before you know it.”

Shane thought of Joey, of the first Christmas after his birth. And while the memory was bittersweet, it wasn't nearly as painful as it might have been—before he'd met Jillian and had realized that time really did heal, that life went on.

“I can't wait,” he said. “Come on, let's go back to the house and tell my family. We won't have to stay long, but I'd like them to know. I think it'll make them happy.”

“All right.”

He reached for her hand, then she gave it a tug. “Wait a minute. I have something I want to confess.”

“What's that?”

“After I found out I was pregnant, I looked you up on the internet. I was curious and wanted to know more about you.”

“I can understand that. I actually did some checking of my own.” He gave her hand a gentle squeeze, knowing what she'd probably learned and ready to deal with it now. After all, with her in his corner, he could handle anything. “So what did you find out?”

“An online newspaper account reported the trouble you had with the police department. At the time I read the article, I wondered if you had a violent side. But the more I got to know you, the more I realized you weren't the kind to snap like that. Not unless provoked.”

He couldn't blame her for being concerned. And he was glad that she'd come to the conclusion that she and the baby would always be safe with him.

“You don't have to tell me what happened that day if you don't want to. It doesn't matter to me anymore. But I want it to be out in the open, since I want us to always have an open relationship.”

He remained silent for a while, rewinding that scene and watching it all over again as it played out in his mind. Then he let it go, wanting the honesty, too.

“His name was Lyle Bailey. And he brutally murdered a little boy. My partner and I had been looking for him, and when we found him, he ran. I took chase, knowing that there'd be no way in hell I'd let him get away. No way I'd let him hurt another child again,
ruin another family. And when I caught him… Well, I snapped. All I could see were two little boys in small caskets, the boy he'd murdered and Joey.”

Jillian reached up and cupped his cheek, then she drew his lips to hers, kissing him softly, sharing his grief. “I understand.”

“I don't have a temper,” he explained. “Although I've got to admit that I'm not sure what I would have done to that guy if my partner hadn't stopped me.”

It seemed like a dark and horrible thing to share, yet because of the intimacy and honesty that stretched between them, it was the perfect time to set it out there.

“I was suspended, with pay,” he added. “You probably read that, too.”

“Yes, and I also know that they reinstated you.”

His lips pressed together, and he nodded. “But after that, after I assaulted Bailey, I thought it would be a good idea to take a leave of absence to wait until Joey's death wasn't so fresh on my mind.”

“Do you ever want to go back to work as a cop?”

“Would it bother you if I did?”

“No, I'm going to support you in whatever you want to do.”

Shane couldn't believe his good fortune. How lucky he'd been when he'd spotted Jillian in that bar, when he'd gone back to her hotel room. And he couldn't wait to start their life together, to get ready for their Christmas baby.

“Come on,” he said, taking her by the hand. “I need to introduce you to my family before they come looking for us. They might get a little loud and boisterous.
And they'll be full of questions. But if you can handle it for a little while I'll follow you back to your place, where we can be alone.”

And where they could seal their love with more than a kiss.

“I hope they like me,” she said.

Shane reached for her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze as they headed back to his parents' house. “Don't worry about that. They're going to love you. I'm more concerned about you liking them.”

“Why? What's wrong with them?”

“They can be a little quirky at times. And intrusive. And generous and loving, too. You know what I mean?”

“I think so.”

As they reached the house, he spotted movement near the shutters, realizing that someone had been peering into the street.

So as he opened the door for Jillian he said, “Okay, you guys. The gig's up. No need to be snoopy, we have an announcement to make.”

His mother swept into the room as though she'd just now become aware of their return, although Shane had a feeling she'd been the one doing the peeking out the window.

“This lovely woman is Jillian Wilkes,” he said, “and she's expecting my baby—a little girl. We're going to get married, although we haven't decided when.”

As the family closed in on them, their smiles revealing their happiness and their willingness to welcome Jillian into the Hollister fold, Shane's heart filled
with love—for her, for their child and for the family that only wanted him to be happy.

 

Jillian opened the door to her small apartment and let Shane inside. She wasn't sure why he'd felt so uneasy about her meeting his family. Sure, they were a little loud and outspoken, but their love for each other was apparent and seemed to spill over into everything they did or said.

They'd ended up staying nearly an hour, since Jillian had felt so welcome and had wanted to join them for dinner.

Now they were back at her apartment, where she scanned the small living area, realizing that this place was only a temporary abode. She had no idea where she and Shane would end up living, but she knew that as long as they were together, anywhere would feel like home.

“Did you get enough to eat?” he asked.

She laughed. “More than enough. Your mom and sisters kept offering me seconds.”

Shane slipped behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. “They mean well.”

“I know they do.” Jillian turned to face him and stepped into his warm embrace. “But there's something you need to keep in mind.”

“What's that?”

“I'm not anything like Marcia. And while I've never had brothers or sisters of my own, I'm actually looking forward to being a part of the Hollister clan—even if they're a little quirky or become intrusive at times.”

Shane kissed her, and as her lips parted, as their tongues began to mate, she drew him close, relishing all she'd found in his arms, in his heart.