A Borrowed Life (Carly and Liam #1) (22 page)

I take advantage of surprising him to turn around and hit my palms against his body to push him further away. I finally emerge from the water in a jump and inhale deeply while rushing to the ladder on my left. I don't even take the time to turn around. I climb out of the pool, still choking and still feeling his hands crushing my vocal cords. I cough uncontrollably as I hear a low voice echo in my ears.

I look up. A coach stands before me, asking if I'm okay. I nod and turn around to look for my assailant, but he's already disappeared. I see the footprints of water heading to the green grass that leads to the sidewalk. He left and I didn’t have time to see who it was. I don't even know if it was a man or a woma
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all of it happened so fast! Everything is so confused in my head! The images replay over and over, but I can't sort out a thing. I let myself fall on my right side while I catch my breath.

It's almost seven o'clock when someone rings the doorbell. I open, wearing simple jeans with a slightly frayed right knee and a gray tank top. The man on the other side of the door is wearing old jeans too, and a t-shirt and a navy cap, but no clothes could hide the muscles of his solid body. His strong jaw, blue eyes, and his slight smirk still have the same effect on me. I throw myself into his arms without any restraint.

“Are you okay?” Liam asks with a shaken voice.

I nod, but I can't even talk. I still see his face as I was drowning. It's to him that I owe being alive right now, even though technically he wasn't even there.

“How did you find out?” I finally ask.

“It doesn't matter, I did and that's it. I was in a meeting when it happened. I came as soon as they told me.”

I don't care to how he knows. Right now, I just want him to hold me; to hear his heart beat and feel his warmth on my body as his energy invades me and reassures me. His fingers brush through my barely dried hair to press me stronger against him. I can feel his distress in his embrace.

“I almost lost you, Carly! Do you have any idea who it was?”

I shake my head. “We can't see anything on the surveillance cameras, either.”

“I know. I spoke to the detective.”

“What?”

“Carly, I was worried! You don’t understand what it's like to find out through a phone call that the woman you love was nearly killed. Despite all the money that I have, despite all the means that I have, I couldn't protect you, and I couldn't be there with you. And I couldn't stop picturing you under the water, drowning. And you…”

I remain frozen. It's still a little weird to hear him say
the woman he loves
.

“I mean, I can't think straight when it comes to you,” he says.

I smile.

“I guess this is what justifies the jeans and T-shirt?” I joke in response. I never thought I'd see Liam so simply dressed. He holds out his hand, smiling.

“Come on.”

We get to his rented gray Honda Civic. Liam sits behind the wheel and I’m in the passenger seat. It's the kind of simplicity that I love. For the first time, I feel no pressure to be perfect, or be someone I'm not. I'm in my element and I feel great! I can only love Liam even more for understanding this need and making up for it.

Liam parks the car at a parking meter at the Hudson River port. The city lights already illuminate a darkening sky. Liam takes my hand and we walk along the river, which I've never really done. I must say that I'm rarely in town, and I'm not stupid enough to walk alone in New York city at night. It wouldn't be very safe.

I marvel at every detail, pointing everything I see to Liam who’s just enjoying the moment. He laughs without restraint and for the first time, I see him without the usual pressure he carries on his shoulders. The fear of judgment that tarnishes his expression fades and allows me tonight to discover the man behind the imposing facade he shows.

When a horse-drown carriage passes in front of us, Liam stops the driver. He holds out his hand for me to lean on him and climb in, and joins me inside. I snuggle against him and in his arms, I feel like we're alone and completely immune to everything.

The horse resumes his route and now we are able to marvel at each attraction we cross. The Statue of Liberty is especially beautiful with all these lights. It's majestic, standing there before us, as the powerful symbol of a value so dear to all of our hearts that we forget too often. I turn to Liam and notice his expression of amazement.

“I never really stopped to look at it,” he says, seeing my astonishment.

“Are you kidding? You live in New York!”

“I'm always working. I don't really live. Well, not until I met you.”

“And I thought you were mad at me for keeping you away from your usual tasks.”

“Not at all! I love the person I’ve become in your presence.”

I turn to him and smile. I don't think he could have given me a better compliment.

“I love this person, too.”

We head to a small coffee shop where we enjoy a slice of absolutely delicious chocolate cake. At some point, Liam's eyes darken as they land onto a man who probably recognized him despite his cap. He drops a twenty-dollar bill on the table, gets up, and we leave.

Today with cell phones, it only takes one person snapping a picture for it to go viral.

“You know this doesn't cost more than six dollars?” I say looking at the twenty.

He smiles, shrugging his shoulders.

“The waitress will have a good tip.”

We walk out of the coffee shop. I know it's because of me he did that. I don't think he had ever stopped to think about a waitress's life before he met me. He treated them as many people do, as if we were born to serve them and that it’s just normal for us.

We stroll along the sidewalks and euphoria takes over us. Liam allows himself to let go and I discover he has a good sense of humor I never would have suspected. That's when he sits next to a statue of a man reading a newspaper on a bench, and I burst out laughing, unable to stop.

He begins to talk with the statue and I laugh so hard that my ribs hurt. I'm able to express my pain with a barely audible “Ouch!” and Liam jumps up and drags me into his arms, joining me in laughter. I finally calm down and we start walking again.

We return to the car, still talking. The evening was wonderful! I hold a rose in my right hand that he snatched from a bouquet of a florist, busting a theatrical movement and handing it to me in a reverence.

At the end of the evening, we walk up to the front door of my apartment. My breathing picks up as he begins kissing me. My fingers dig in his shoulders and his grip on my waist tightens as if slowly losing control. Suddenly, he pins me against the wall behind me, giving way to a surge of passion that’s clearly too strong for him to resist. He kisses me even more wildly and completely takes over me.

His fingers slide along my arms that he lifts above my head to hold my wrists in his grasp. His one hand brushes down my body, stopping on the side of my breast and leaving me breathless. Suddenly, he stops and steps back, pulling himself together.

“I'm sorry.”

“For what?”

“I lost control. I…”

“I loved it!”

“Don't say that. You don't know what you mean.”

“What?”

He sighs and presses a soft kiss on my forehead.

“Forget it. I love you and I want to take care of you. I could never bear to hurt you.”

“I'm not as fragile as you think. You won't hurt me because you let your instincts take over.”

He purses his lips together, trying not to say something that he obviously doesn't want to tell me.

“Carly, believe me when I say you don't know what you mean. What matters is the man I am when I'm with you.”

“I'm not sure I understand?”

“I love you,” he whispers in my ear, holding me in his arms. “Good night.”

With that, he leaves and I stand there, alone and completely exhilarated. I sigh before pushing the door of my apartment, disappointed and troubled. Sean is lying on the couch waiting for me.

“Really?” he says.

“What?”

“Mr. Perfect is too perfect to enjoy himself tonight?”

“Shut up!”

“Oh! We're grumpy! You need it.”

“SEAN!” I yell and it takes him by surprise. It’s not like me to react this way, and I’m a little surprised myself.

“Hey, are you okay?” he wonders, standing.

He pauses his movie and makes space next to him for me to sit.

“Yes. It's just something he said… I… Well, it was weird. That's all.”

“Really?”

I shrug and shake my head.

“Anyway, I had a great evening and that’s what I choose to remember.”

I go into into my room without giving him anymore details.

I remove my shirt to put on my pajamas when I see an envelope on my pillow. Intrigued, I open it and find a picture of Liam and me, eating the chocolate cake. I look at it with more stars in my eyes than there are in the sky. On the back, there is a note:

Respect our agreement, Carly. Or things could go wrong!

I take in a sharp breath. My hands are shaking. This isn’t good at all. The note clearly came from Richard Lexington. He had me followed, obviously. Whatever! I will not let him intimidate me! I throw the message in the garbage and tomorrow, I won't even think about it.

No need to contact the police. What could they possibly hold against Mr. Lexington? He would be able to buy them anyway, which would make things even worse for me. I know it, I've already been there. I can't trust the police.

I stretch out and yawn, unable to bring myself to get up. My face is buried in my pillow. I mutter under my breath as I take one leg after another out of my sheets, letting them fall limply on the floor. I find myself sliding out of bed and sitting on the carpet in my panties and tank top.

“Where is she!” my brother yells suddenly.

I frown looking at my alarm clock. It's only nine in the morning, what's he doing up before ten o'clock? But I hardly have time to ask myself that when heavy knocks bang on my door.

“What do you want?” I ask with an irritated tone, slowly getting up.

He comes in, holding a newspaper in his hand.

“You weren't supposed to see him again!” he wails.

“I do what I want with my life, I remind you.”

“Carly, this is serious! Think before acting for once!”

“Yeah, and you sure are the best person to give me advice on that.”

“Definitely! Because when you’re in trouble, there will be only me to get you out of it. Even if our lives aren’t so great, I have no desire to move again with a new identity because my little sister fucked up again!”

“That's not fair! I never asked you for anything! It wasn't even my fault, and I don't have to pay for it for the rest of my life!”

My voice fills with tears as I finish my sentence and I let myself fall on my bed, crying. Ethan takes a breath to calm himself down, then comes to sit beside me.

“I'm sorry,” he says. “I got carried away.”

“I can't take it, Ethan! I don't want to live in a prison like this all the time. Just think of me in this situation. Do you think I like it? I live each day being reminded of everything you've sacrificed for me. Sometimes I wish you wouldn't have done it, you know.”

“Stop! I have no regrets. I'm here with you and you're safe now, that's all that matters. I wouldn't want it to happen again, that's all. What if he finds you? I would spend my nights fearing you're not okay. And if he hurt you…”

He pauses before finishing his sentence.

“It won't happen.”

“Promise?”

I nod.

“It's that bad?” I ask, pointing at the newspaper.

He shakes his head.

“There are no photos. Only the same description of a pretty brunette, but they are getting more and more detailed.”

I sigh. I promised him everything would be fine, but I wonder how long I’ll be able to keep my promise. He's right; if my former stepfather were to find me, it would be really bad! I am sure that Richard will do everything for that to happen, or at least make me believe it could, so that I accept his protection and rules.

“Are you working today?” he asks.

I nod. “At three o'clock.”

“Do you finish late?”

“I don't know, why?”

“Just so I know,” he says with a shrug. “I'll pick you up.”

“Yes, okay.”

“By the way, did you hear from the detective?”

I signal him no.

No, and I doubt that I will. Whoever attacked me at the pool was careful not to leave any clues, and it almost looks like a professional did it. Except if that was the case, I probably wouldn't have survived. I scratch my throat nervously, thinking back to his hands choking me and I take a deep breath. He’s out there, somewhere, and he could return at any moment.

Liv doesn't work tonight, and I always feel alone when she's not here. She is my accomplice, my best friend and it's especially thanks to her that I can put up with Cayden. Fortunately, the evening is so busy that I don't have time to think about it. Joe is a regular customer in his late fifties who dines here every Wednesday evening at seven o'clock. He's always alone, and orders the same burger with fries every time. Tonight, I don't find him at his table until seven forty-five; he had to wait until a table was available in my section.

“This Cinderella story has attracted quite a crowd in here, huh?” he says.

I try to stay as natural as possible in responding.

“Yes. It will run its course.”

“Hey, aren’t they talking about the cruise you were on?”

I shrug.

“I don't know. I must say that I haven’t been paying too much attention to these rumors.”

His smile says it all. He knows it's me. Or so he believes.

“Good for you,” he adds.

“Same thing as usual?”

“Why change?” he replies, smiling.

I leave and continue my routine.

It's eleven thirty when I finish my shift. I haven't stopped for a minute and I'm exhausted. I count my cash, separate the tips, and exit through the back door as usual. Again, I find a black car waiting for me in front of the alley. Javen comes out to open the back door of the Lexus. I take a deep breath and then sigh. I'll have to talk to Liam about this.

“Mademoiselle,” Javen greets.

“Hello, Javen. My brother was supposed to pick me up?”

“Mr. Walker already notified him.”

“Really?”

How did Liam know Ethan was supposed to pick me up after work? That's something I really have to confront him about. I'm beginning to question his slightly unhealthy habit of wanting to know every move I make and wanting to control my life. His obsession for my safety is becoming somewhat worrying.

I get in the vehicle to find Liam sitting in the back seat. He looks tired, too.

“Hello, my love,” he says, leaning over to kiss me.

I snuggle into his arms, happy to see him.

“Have you been waiting here for a long time?”

He shakes his head in response, without specifying exactly how long.

“Rough night?” he wonders.

“Quite rough, yes. I'm glad to see you!”

His arms around me is the best remedy for the pain that takes over every muscle in my body right now.

“Did you have a good day?” I ask.

“It was long. I missed you.”

“You did?”

I look at him with a wide smile and he kisses me tenderly. He approaches his mouth to my ear to whisper in it.

“I had to cancel a meeting because I wasn't presentable.”

I frown, not understanding exactly what he means.

“I thought back to that last kiss we exchanged, to last night when I didn't go inside with you. I was hard,” he admits quietly.

I look down towards his crotch, smiling as I realize he is again. He looks at me with his crooked smile as my eyes question him. I gently place my hand on his thigh and his eyelids close. He releases a heavy sigh as my fingers stroke his penis. He has such a strong effect on me, and it’s so exciting to see what I can do to him! But at that moment, his hand grabs my wrist.

“I can't think straight if you touch me.”

I climb over him, his hands on my waist.

“Maybe I don't want you to think.”

“But I have to talk to you about something.”

I back up suddenly. Oh this doesn’t sound good!

“My brother is getting married in a week,” he begins. “I want you to come with me.”

I sit back on the seat, thinking.

“I won't really be able to disguise myself there, you know.”

“I don't want you in disguise, I want you to come as you. I don't want you to be afraid of journalists, or being recognized. I want to be with you, Carly. You are the woman of my dreams! It will be known someday. The longer we wait, the more it prolongs this mystery and myth of Cinderella, and the more the frenzy will become uncontrollable.”

I take a deep breath while thinking about words. Did he actually say the woman of his dreams? But he's right. If I continue to see him, it will be known. This is inevitable and it's probably already too late to turn back.

“Carly, I don't know what scares you so much and I see that you don't want to talk to me about it. I respect that, but how do you want me to reassure you that everything is going to be fine if I don't even know what is worrying you?”

“I can't tell you. Not now. Liam, I want to be with you and I'm ready to take a risk because I'm convinced that it's worth it, but I have to be smart about it.”

“Are you afraid of someone?”

I turn to him.

“How did you guess?”

“It's pretty obvious.”

I don’t say anything. I didn't think it was that obvious.

“Carly, I spent part of my day doing some research.”

“What!”

“Don't take it the wrong way! I saw the article this morning in the newspaper. I didn't know why it was bothering you to be in the spotlight, so I wanted answers to know if I should be worried or not.”

“And what did you find?”

“Nothing. Nothing before the age of fourteen.”

I sigh.

“There are two possibilities, but given your age back then, I doubt you're hiding from justice for a crime, so it leaves a high probability that you're hiding from someone. I also spoke to Ethan.”

Obviously! And my brother must have tried to reason with him, to try to make him understand our relationship puts me in danger.

“I was very young and… different,” I finally confesses.

“Different how?”

“Just different. I was a teenager. I stayed with this family only for a few months before I ran away with Ethan. I don’t know if he would recognize me if he sees me, but I just don't want to take the risk.”

“Who would recognize you?”

“My former stepfather.”

“Did he hurt you?”

I shake my head.

“He wanted to. But he never had the opportunity. He often referred to disgusting things and spoke of the other girls who had lived with him. His wife knew, but she was too afraid to do anything about it. He had two sons, too. For all I know, they are as guilty as he was. One day, I found pictures. I only remember two of them, and I spent that evening vomiting.

“It was after my adoptive parents' death that I was placed there, and Ethan and I had lost track of each other, so he couldn't protect me. One night, Bill tried himself on me. I managed to push him away and ran. A woman who worked at my school took me to her place for a few nights until I tracked down my brother. I couldn't talk to the police, and I couldn't go back to their house. My only solution was to run away. I was still a minor, but Ethan was an adult, so we left and we started all over here, in Jersey City. He gave up everything: his job, his studies, his internship. He gave up all of that to be able to protect me.”

My gaze fixes on the floor. I hate thinking of everything that Ethan has sacrificed for me. I feel responsible for his misfortune, and I will forever feel indebted to him. If it wasn't for me, he would be a technician in the mechanical engineering field, not a maintenance worker.

“Why didn't you talk to the police!” Liam immediately argues.

I let out a laugh.

“Liam, I only summarized the situation, leaving out the details of the kind of man he was. There were many before me. Some wanted to sue, but they were never seen again. And honestly, who cares about a teenage girl without family or friends? No one! He knows many people and has important connections to the government. No judge would have convicted him.”

He takes a deep breath.

“If he comes after you…” He stops in the middle of his sentence, not saying the rest of his thought. “Where is he now?”

“I don't know.”

“Give me his name, I wil
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”

“No, you won't!”

“Carly, I want to protect you from him.”

“Yes, I got that, and it's rather intrusive for that matter! But I don't want you to. My brother has already sacrificed a lot for me and I refuse to live with the burden that you feel you have to interfere, too.”

“So it's because of him that you don't want to be with me? Don't you think that’s a much heavier burden to bear?”

It is. It has almost become unbearable. I can't live with him and I can't live without him. I'm completely torn between my heart and my head, and I don't know what to do. The truth is, I've changed a lot since I was fourteen and even if my picture is on the front page, there's very little chance that he would recognize me, even if he were to see it, since he never read these kinds of gossip magazines. Since my identity remains unknown to the public, I give all the power to Mr. Lexington to blackmail me, but if I go out in public, he will have nothing to hold over my head.