A Breath of Scandal (30 page)

Lara and Christy were anxiously awaiting them when they returned to the castle some hours later. They were aware of the attack and had watched from the castle walls as the enemy was routed.

“Are you hurt?” Lara asked, throwing her arms around Julian. “Did you recognize them?”

“I didn’t get a good look but I’d be willing to bet that Crockett was one of the men. He’s the Jackal’s toady, does all his dirty work.”

“Do you think we’ve seen the last of them?”

Julian shot Sinjun a warning look. He saw no reason to worry the women. “I think Christy’s clansmen scared them off for good. Nevertheless, I don’t want either you or Christy to venture outside the curtain wall alone.”

“I usually visit the sick in the village every Friday,” Christy said, looking askance at Sinjun. “Shall I take a guard with me?”

“Several,” Sinjun said. “At least until we’re sure the ruffians have left the area. Rory is alerting the clansmen to danger now. Any strangers in the area will be reported to Rory.”

“I’m starving,” Julian said, changing the subject. “How soon before supper?”

“You have sufficient time to clean up,” Christy said. “Dinner is in an hour. Mary said to tell you she’s making something special for you tonight.”

Julian rolled his eyes and groaned. “I’m almost afraid to ask. How many ways can she prepare oats?”

“Don’t complain, Julian,” Lara said, laughter coloring her words. “You’re lucky Mary doesn’t serve oats at every meal.”

Everyone except Julian was amused. He wouldn’t put it past Mary to do just that.

“I had a bath prepared for you,” Lara said as they climbed the staircase to their chamber.

A wicked gleam darkened Julian’s eyes. “Christy said we had an hour. What I have in mind won’t take that long.”

Lara opened the door to their chamber. “Don’t you ever think of anything else?”

She squealed in surprise when Julian swept her from her feet and carried her into the chamber, slamming the door with his foot. “How
can
I think of anything else when a wild Gypsy tempts me beyond endurance?”

“Julian Thornton! I do no such thing.”

“You don’t have to do anything, sweeting,” Julian rasped. “I find your scent, the way you walk, the way you look at me highly arousing.” He spied the tub sitting before the fire and let Lara slide down his body. “You can scrub my back.”

He began tearing off his clothing. From the corner of his eye he saw Lara watching him. He heard her sigh, a soft, sweet sound of longing, and he smiled. Soon he’d change that sigh into a scream of ecstasy. Driven by an urgent need of his own, Julian stepped into the tub and scrunched down into the water.

“Would you care to join me?” he asked hopefully. “I can make room for you.”

“I’ve already bathed,” Lara informed him. “Besides, I want to hear about the attack and what it means.”

“Later,” Julian hedged. He leaned forward, bringing his knees up to his chin. “Can you reach my back?”

Lara stared at his broad back a moment, then dropped to her knees behind him. She soaped a cloth and began scrubbing with more vigor than was warranted.

“Take it easy, love, I’ve grown rather fond of my hide.”

“Sorry,” Lara muttered, easing the pressure. A moment later she tossed the cloth into the bathwater and stood up. “Done. You can wash the rest yourself.”

“Pity,” Julian said, looking for all the world like a child who’d just been denied dessert.

Lara turned away while Julian completed his bath. She didn’t dare watch him. She’d become aroused just scrubbing his back. Last night and again this morning she’d been so thoroughly sated she wouldn’t have believed she could still feel desire scant hours later. The power Julian wielded over her senses was frightening. It wasn’t right that she should love him so much while his feelings for her were tepid at best.

“Hand me the drying cloth,” Julian said, rousing Lara from her silent ruminations.

Lara picked up the cloth she’d placed on the hearthstone to warm and offered it to him.

“Hold it out for me,” Julian said, splashing water on the floor as he rose from the tub.

Lara stretched out the cloth, peering over the top at him. Her breath stalled in her lungs when he lunged from the tub and shook himself like an animal, a magnificent animal. He was even more impressive nude than he was dressed. Even at rest his manhood was imposing. But it didn’t remain at rest for long. Her cheeks pinkened when it began to stir and stretch. Scant seconds later it was fully aroused. Thick and hard, it rose proud and defiant from a dark forest. Lara literally tossed the drying cloth at him and turned away. Letting him see how much she wanted him would only fuel his arrogance.

She felt his hand on her shoulder and stiffened. “Look at me, sweeting. There’s no shame to feel desire for your husband.”

Lara whirled around. “ ’Tis not shame I feel, Julian. ’Tis regret. I wish …”

He dropped the drying cloth and drew her into his arms. “What do you wish, love?” She hesitated. “The truth, Lara. I’ll give you whatever you desire, if it’s within my power to do so,” he added.

“I love you, Julian. I won’t be happy until I make you love me.”

He kissed her with such insistent fervor that her world spun with heady delight. She knew he loved her. Why couldn’t he just say it?

“Perhaps my problem is that I care about you more than I should, more than I have a right to care about another woman,” Julian whispered against her lips.

Stunned, Lara leaned back and stared at him. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“It’s something I have to work out on my own, love.”

She whirled away from him. “Diana and your dead child will always be closer to your heart than me and the children we have together.”

“You’re wrong, Lara.”

“Prove it, Julian,” Lara challenged. “Why can’t you just say the words?”

“I’ve never made love to anyone like I make love to you. I’ve never felt the things I feel with you.”

Lara frowned. “That’s a good start. Was it so difficult?”

“Aye, for reasons you can’t even guess.”

“Tell me.”

“I don’t know how to explain this, love. It’s difficult. Diana would be alive today if not for my involvement with the government. She was an innocent victim and now she’s gone. The guilt I feel over her death is a tremendous burden.”

“Why can’t you move past Diana’s death?”

“Because her death isn’t the only guilt I carry. I didn’t love her enough, Lara. I realize that now. I’ve known it for a very long time but didn’t want to acknowledge it. My feelings for you are stronger than those tepid emotions I felt for Diana, and the knowledge eats at my soul. I caused an innocent woman’s death, a woman I didn’t love as much as she loved me. I can’t put that behind me, not yet. Do you understand now what I’m trying to say?”

“Not really, Julian, tell me more.”

He glanced over at the clock sitting on the mantle. “Not now. ’Tis late. We’ve barely time …” He bore her backward, toward the bed. Her knees hit the edge and he lifted her onto the mattress. “I’ve thought of nothing but this all day.”

His expression was taut, his emotions concealed in the shadows created by the thick fringe of his lashes. A lock of hair fell over his forehead. Sweat gleamed on his bunched shoulder muscles and straining biceps as he leaned over her.

He undressed her slowly, arousing her with great passion and admirable restraint, making her body sing and her blood thicken. She was sobbing incoherently when he finally parted her thighs and rocked into her. She clung to him, riding the increasing tempo of his thrusts, gyrating her hips against the torrent of sensation buffeting her.

She tried to make it last, tried to will away the exquisite, wrenching pleasure that beat through her, in her, over her. But it was no use. She sobbed his name and let go, splintering, careening, spinning as pulse after pulse of intense sensations battered her.

She was floating in a sea of raw pleasure as Julian drove into her one last time, then stiffened. His head snapped back and his hips ground against hers. A deep, body-wrenching convulsion set him free. He climaxed violently, then collapsed.

He was heavy, but Lara relished his heat and hardness. Her arms came around him, holding him tightly. After a few minutes, he raised up and pushed himself away.

“I always get a little wild when I make love to you,” he rasped. “I didn’t mean for it to go so fast.”

“It’s a good thing it did,” Lara said, smiling. “We’re already late for supper.”

Julian gave an exhausted moan. “If I weren’t so hungry I’d be tempted to skip the evening meal.”

“You might be willing to go hungry but I’m not,” Lara said, pushing herself out of bed. “Get up, lazybones.”

They washed and dressed quickly and hurried downstairs. The buzz of conversation came to a halt and everyone stared at them when they entered the hall. Moments later the hall erupted in a cacophony of laughter and clapping. Blushing, Lara slipped into her chair and pulled Julian down beside her.

“Julian,” she hissed into his ear. “Do you think they know why we’re late?”

Julian spared her an indulgent grin. “They know exactly what kept us, love. Don’t fret, it’s expected of newlyweds.”

Sinjun confirmed Julian’s words.

“We started our meal without you and Lara,” he said with a twinkle. “Actually, I’m surprised to see you made it at all.”

“What? And miss Mary’s surprise?” Julian scoffed.

“Ah, there ye be, me fine lord,” Mary said, bustling into the hall bearing something on a plate that didn’t look edible. “I made this specially for yer pleasure.” She set the plate before Julian with a flourish. “Enjoy, Yer Lordship.”

Julian glanced down at the grayish blob quivering on the plate and wrinkled his nose. It looked and smelled like a bloated piece of offal. “What in bloody hell is
that
? Is this a joke, Sinjun?”

Sinjun nearly choked on his laughter. “ ’Tis no joke, brother. Have you never heard of haggis? ’Tis a delicacy in these parts.”

Julian glanced at Lara. She was trying not to laugh and losing the battle. “What in bloody hell is haggis? Is it edible?”

Mary glared at him. “I wouldna be serving it to ye if it wasna edible,” she huffed. “I thought to honor ye by making ye a dish relished by all Highlanders.”

“Do you know what’s in this?” Julian asked in an aside to Lara. “Am I expected to eat it?”

“ ’Tis a mixture of liver, oats, and spices cooked in a sheep’s stomach,” she replied. “ ’Tisn’t so bad once you get used to it.”

“Cut into it, Julian,” Sinjun urged. “Mary is a wonderful cook.”

Julian didn’t want to offend Mary, and rather than suffer her disappointment, he cut into the haggis. The revolting filling oozed from the stomach, assaulting Julian’s senses with its odious scent. His gut clenched and he swallowed convulsively.

“Dig in, Yer Lordship,” Mary said gleefully. “I’ve made enough for everyone.”

As if on cue, the kitchen help brought out steaming platters of haggis, which they passed around the various tables. Julian’s face paled as he watched the Highlanders cut into their haggis and stuff it into their mouths with obvious relish.

“Go on,” Sinjun urged. “It won’t kill you, Julian.”

“I’m not so sure about that,” Julian muttered. Still and all, how bad could it be when everyone seemed to be enjoying it. Even Sinjun, who had eaten food prepared by the finest chefs in England, seemed to have acquired a taste for haggis.

Julian knew everyone, including Mary, was watching him. Girding himself for the worst, he placed a small portion in his mouth and chewed. Taste burst in his mouth, and it wasn’t pleasant. He started to gag, thought better of it, and chewed slowly, aware that this was the greatest trial he had ever faced. If he spat out the haggis, everyone would laugh at him. If he swallowed, he wasn’t sure he could keep it down.

“How is it?” Sinjun asked in a teasing tone. “Does it suit your palate?”

Unable to swallow, Julian spoke around the haggis that seemed to grow in his throat. “ ’Tis … tolerable.”

“Ye have to swallow it to enjoy it,” Mary encouraged.

Julian forced the haggis down his throat, felt the mess hit his stomach, and turned visibly green. After a few deep breaths and a long swallow of ale, he was able to speak normally. “ ’Tis not something I’d care to eat every day.”

“Nor once a year. Nor again in your lifetime,” Sinjun guffawed.

“Pass it down the table, someone will gladly eat your share,” Christy said. Julian eagerly obliged. Mary appeared satisfied that Julian had at least tried it and retreated into the kitchen with a pleased smile curving her lips. He was relieved when the main course arrived moments later.

“That woman is diabolical,” Julian muttered in Mary’s wake. That only brought on more good-natured laughter.

As the meal progressed, Julian couldn’t help thinking about the men who had been sent to kill him. Protecting Lara and his family came before any consideration for himself. He knew what he had to do.

After the prolonged meal, Julian saw Lara stifle a yawn. He promptly excused them and took her off to bed. The moment the door closed behind him, Lara turned on him, all signs of exhaustion vanished.

“You’re not getting off that easily, Julian. You never did tell me what you intended to do about the attack. They won’t go away, you know. They’re just waiting for you to leave the castle again. I can’t bear to see you killed.”

Julian plowed his fingers through his hair in a distracted manner. “Remaining at Glenmoor could endanger you and my family. Those men would have killed Sinjun today and thought nothing of it. I refuse to become a virtual prisoner within the walls of Glenmoor. I have to leave. Sinjun offered his Highlanders as escort should I decide to return to London.”

“When would we leave?”

“You mean when would
I
leave,” Julian corrected. “You’re not going anywhere until the Jackal and his cohorts are in prison. They’re not above using you to get to me.”

“You’re not going anywhere without me,” Lara said, giving her head a stubborn shake.

“Don’t make this any harder than it is, love. Your life is precious to me. You’ll stay here with Sinjun and Christy until I say ’tis safe to leave.”