A Broken Beautiful Beginning (19 page)

I look up to see Caleb already fast asleep. I kiss the back of Willow
’s head and finally fall asleep as well.

I wake to feel a soft little hand stroking my face right over the bruise. Then it moves over all the sore spots. I sluggishly open one eye and am met by Willow’s big green eyes as she faces me, nose to nose. She moves her head back a little then attempts to whisper. “I kiss it better.” But we all know Willow’s whispers aren’t soft at all. She leans forward and kisses my nose.

“I missed you M
omma.” She says as she smiles a bright smile. She’s lying down on her tummy with her legs swinging behind her.

“I missed you so much sweetie.” I pull her into my side, she giggles the entire time
clearly waking up Caleb in the process. I haven’t seen her for almost four days and in that time she looks so much older. I know it’s not possible but it feels that way. I missed her so damn much.

When Willow spots Caleb waking up she squeals and jumps onto him grabbing him in a tight hug as if she didn’t notice him lying there before. Caleb hasn’t really seen Willow in a while so I can only imagine how the two must have missed each other.

He wraps his arms around her. “I’ve missed you so much baby girl.” His voice is pained as he speaks and kisses her forehead stroking the hair from her face. She kisses his bruised face too but doesn’t ask us about it.

“Where have you been? I’ve been so sad without you. Momma cried every night you weren’t at home
Daddy and then I had bad dreams about you going away and not coming back. I wet my bed too, I didn’t mean to, but I did. Momma let me sleep with her and then we went to visit Granny and then Momma left me.” As her mother, I understand Willow’s four year old rambling gibberish clearly and looking at Caleb’s shaken expression he understood it too. She’s close to tears, so I pull myself closer to them resting my head on Caleb’s shoulder, running my hand through her silky hair.

Caleb seems to be in shock, his mouth opens and closes but no words come out. He does however wrap an arm around me and squeeze me tight and I watch as he holds Willow closer into him too. I try to calm Willow down, promising her we won’t go away anymore, telling her we’ll spend the day on the beach together as a family. This does the trick because she runs off to her room excitedly.

Caleb doesn’t ask any questions but I can tell Willow’s sad words have affected him.

We spend most of the day down on the beach. Anna joins us, as does Hunter. Pure happiness radiates from Hunter whenever we invite him to spend time with us, and I love to see it.

I see my father sitting on the patio upstairs with a sad look on his face as he looks down at all of us on the beach. I don’t really want to see him, but I need to have words with him.

“I’ll be right back.” I tell Anna, she looks up at my father then back at me and smiles as if she can read my thoughts.

I make my way up the wooden stairs but my steps slow the closer I get. I don’t know what more I can say to the man. I’ve said all I could last night when I let everything out. I didn’t mean to bring up things from the past, I just had too much going on in my head and I needed space for new shit.

I sit down quietly in the chair next to him, looking down at Hunter and Caleb building sandcastles with Willow as Anna takes photos.

“I’m so sorry baby girl.” My father’s throaty voice breaks through my thoughts. He hands me a cold beer then takes a sip of his. I sip mine. I never usually like the taste of beer but in this hot sun, the cold liquid down my throat is rather refreshing.

“I know you’re sorry daddy, but it still doesn’t change the fact that your actions put me in danger.” I say turning my eyes to look up at him. “You didn’t even come looking for me. You thought I’d just run off. Would you just run away from me Daddy?” he shakes his head sadly. “Well I would never run away and leave Willow behind either.”

“I know that
now
Harley, I’ve fucked up too many times to count. Leaving you with Raven, even allowing Raven near you and your baby and then letting those fuckers take you and hurt you.” He shakes his head angrily and squeezes his free hand into a fist. Knuckles white.

“Not once did I ever want any harm to come to you baby. I thought the club would look after you, I didn’t think you’d get hurt because of the club. You mean the most to me Harley, my brothers come second. I know it doesn’t look that way, but I promise you that’s how I feel. I should have treated you better, you’re my only child and I’ve done a shitty job at keeping you safe. I’m so sorry. Don’t know how you will ever forgive me for what I’ve put you through.” My father’s voice is soft and sad. He seems so old sitting there begging me for forgiveness and I can’t help but stand up and reach over to give him a hug. He stands up too and wraps his heavy arms around me, kissing the top of my head.

I speak against his chest. “I forgive you
now
daddy but I’m not going to forgive and forget so easily if there’s a next time. You also need to start trusting Anna more too. I know whatever went down was club business but Anna is your
wife
, I know you trust her more than anyone else so stop leaving her out in the cold. You can’t keep shutting her out Daddy. She was so sad about how you treated her during this entire take down.” He frowns and looks over my shoulders to where Anna laughs and smiles at Willow burying Hunter with only his head sticking out the sand.

He looks back down at me and kisses my forehead, “You’re right baby girl.” He looks back down to them on the beach and says softly. “You’re right.”

On my way back from the bathroom a door
being slammed in the car port catches my attention. I peep through the window to find Jace pacing. I have never seen him dressed so casual before. He wears a vest, a pair of board shorts and flip flops. A laugh escapes my throat at how uncomfortable he seems. I’m so used to seeing him in black leather, jeans and boots. He moves to sit in his car with his door open and he’s close enough for me to see him talking to himself.

I shake my head and open the door. He’s so busy talking himself into knocking on my door that he doesn’t even notice me walking towards his car door. When I kick a rock and curse as I grab a toe, his head whips up to look at me and his rambling stops.

I smile brightly at him and tilt my head to the side as I point back to the house. “You going to sit out here all day or are you going to enjoy the beach with us? Daddy’s making his famous chicken wings on the grill.”

His shoulders immediately relax and his dimples appear. He nods enthusiastically like a little boy as he climbs out the car. He looks sober, even happier than I’ve ever seen him before.

I lead him around to the beach but he grabs my hands and halts me.

“I need to talk to you first before we go out there. I have a few things I’d like to say and I need you to listen...” he shakes his head, “I mean… I’d like for you to listen.” His tone dies down.

I nod my head and offer him a seat in the living room. He sits next to me and takes my hand in his.

“I want you to know how sorry I am. I treated you so badly Harley and I will regret it till the day I die. You probably heard about my uh...my condition and I know it’s no excuse because I could have controlled it with the medicine I was told to take. I was reckless and treated you so terribly, I didn’t know what I was doing half the time and I’m so sorry you got caught up in my recklessness. I want you to know that the love I felt for you
was real,
regardless of my actions.” I try to pull away but he wraps his other hand gently over mine.

“I love you and Willow… and because I do, I want you to be happy with Caleb. He is more of a man than I could ever hope to be. He is good for you both and you deserve someone like him. I know you don’t need my approval for anything, but I just wanted you to know that I see how much he loves you and I know how much you love him too. Even the way Willow looks at him, I can see the love that little girl has for her father. I see the love you have for him and I just want what’s best for you, unfortunately that will never be me. I’ll keep my distance; I know my place but please...please don’t keep Willow from me. I want to see her grow up and I want to be part of your lives, even if I’m just a friend.” His eyes hold so much pain. I swallow the tears and try to form a smile. I give him a tight hug, there’s nothing sexual about it even though his arms linger a little longer than mine do. I smile at him.

“I’d like that Jace. Thank you for this, for saying all of that. I love Caleb, I really do. I know Willow misses you…” His grin widens as I mention this. “…She keeps asking for her Uncle Jacey.”

We head down to the beach, no awkwardness between us whatsoever. I know Jace loves me in his own way and although I wasn’t looking for his approval when it came to Caleb, his words still hit my heart. I feel more at ease, more relaxed and happier.

“Jacey!” Willow squeals, running from Caleb’s arms toward Jace. Jace bends down and grabs hold of her tight. He laughs so hard, not caring that my daughter is sopping wet.

“Missed you little Willow, you’re getting so big.” He smiles brightly. I turn to look at Caleb praying he’s not angry with me; instead he’s too busy tackling Hunter into the ocean. He’s obviously not worried about Jace being here at all.

“Will you build castles with me Jacey?” Willow asks, as she tugs him towards her toys in the sand where Anna and my father sit under the gazebo looking at the exchange with shocked expressions.

“Sure baby girl.” Jace replies running after her happily.

Chapter 10

CALEB POV

It’s been a week since we all spent that day on the beach. My mother and brothers showed up that afternoon as well as Brent and of course Jesse. There was no drama and no talk of clubs, just family spending time with family.

I wasn’t surprised to see Jace when he came down to the beach… I was the one who invited him over after all. Willow loves the guy and even though Harley won’t admit it, I know she loved him at some point too. He may not have been able to protect her from himself but he made sure to protect Harley from others. Everybody deserves a second chance and I don’t regret giving him one.

We had a long talk that morning on the phone. He had assured me that he knew his place when it came to him being in my girls lives. He realizes now that they’re mine; they always have and always will be. If I were more selfish I would’ve kept him away from them but I know it’ll only cause more trouble, we’re now in the same Club after all.

Even though he hurt my girl time and time again, she managed to forgive him and move past it. He was also the one to look after her and Willow when I wasn’t around for all those years. I know he won’t harm Willow in anyway and I sure as hell hope he knows what will happen to him if he lays one finger on Harley again.

I won’t be so kind a second time, I stop at second chances.

He doesn’t drink himself into a stupor anymore although we do find him at the bar more often than I’d like. He’s working out at the gym now too. He lost a lot of Grimm’s trust when he found out what he had done to Harley and even though Harley is okay with him, Grimm takes betrayal seriously. He needs to earn Grimm’s trust back, so in the meantime Grimm has him doing shitty jobs. Harley also told me that Jace has been speaking to a therapist now and then too.

Good for him, he’s really trying to get his life back together.

Every single night for the past week Willow’s words have haunted me.
Where have you been? I’ve been so sad without you. Momma cried every night you weren’t here and then I had bad dreams about you going away and not coming back. I wet my bed too, I didn’t mean to but I did. Momma let me sleep with her and then we went to visit Granny and then Momma left me.

Those fucking words broke my heart.

“How about we go to the park today?” I ask Willow as she sits by the counter eating the rest of her cereal.

Her entire face lights up. “Just me and you?” I nod.

“Can we go now?” she asks eagerly.

“As soon as you finish your breakfast and get dressed baby girl.” I say, kissing her forehead.

She quickly pulls up the bowl and starts drinking the rest of it. I chuckle and turn to look at the newspaper on the table in front of me. The front page reports a story about the local police force finding and arresting fifteen people who are reportedly involved with dealing and selling drugs in our town. It also states that arrests have been made to various men associated with the Stowaways motorcycle club. I smile to myself knowing that Grimm did what he set out to do.

Willow sits on the park bench next to me swinging her legs joyfully, eating her ice-cream and watching the ducks in the pond. I finally find the courage to ask her about Harley.

“Willow, remember when daddy was working late all those nights a while back?” I ask her softly running my hands through her dark her. Willow’s swinging legs stop and she looks up to me.

“Yes Daddy.” She says.

“You said
Momma was sad, can you tell me what happened?” I use a soft tone hoping I don’t upset her.

She eats the rest of her ice cream then turns around and looks at me. “Momma was really sad
Daddy. I tried to make her laugh and smile but she still cried every night. I would play like I was sleeping and then she would go to the bathroom and put the shower on, but I could still hear Momma crying. I think she was scared to sleep by herself Daddy so I slept with her. I don’t think I helped her sleep though because when I woke up during the night she was still awake.” She plays with her hands and avoids looking up at my face.

“I had nightmares about you not coming back but
Momma kept the nightmares away when I slept by her.”

Hearing this from my daughter makes it feel like a knife slicing through my heart. My girl suffered because of
my
actions and my daughter had nightmares thinking that she was going to lose her father.

My thoughtlessness had caused this and the guilt I felt was overwhelming. I had put my girls through absolute hell.

I pulled Willow onto my lap and held her tight. “I’ll never leave you or your momma like that ever again. I promise you Willow, I’m not going anywhere.” She put her little arms around my neck and rested her head against my shoulder. I had missed my little girl so much.

I plan on keeping my word and making sure Harley knows I’m not going anywhere again but I may just need my daughter to help me do that.

I make a stop at her father’s that evening after the gym. I need to have a word with him. I know he’s not the traditional type but after seeing the smile on his face after we spoke, it was all worth it. Now I just have to wait till morning to ask her...

HARLEY POV.

I wake up to Caleb pressing soft kisses on my neck behind my ear. I curl closer into him feeding off his warmth. I hear the door squeak, followed by Willow’s little footsteps making her way over to my side of the bed. She climbs up and curls into my side, resting her head onto my pillow and I feel her looking at me. I feel Caleb’s eyes looking down at me too, but I’m too busy enjoying the comfort of being surrounded by the two people I love most, so I keep my eyes closed.

Willow grabs my finger like she usually does but this time something’s different, this time I feel something being placed on my finge
r. My ring finger…it’s a ring. I open one eye, and Willow giggles.

It’s sparkly, simple yet beautiful and so...me.

Caleb chuckles in my ear, and I turn my head up to look at him full of surprise.

“It’s the ring I was going to give you that night all those years ago. I’ll get you a better one if you want...if you-” I pull his head in for a kiss and he chuckles again against my lips. Willow moves from my arms, jumping up and down on the bed full of excitement.

Caleb looks down at me, love shining through his eyes and a smile playing out on his lips.

“I love you so much Harley! We’ve been through so much these past couple of months, I’m so sorry for everything I’ve put you through… I love you so much and want to spend the rest of my life proving that to you. Marry me! Let me prove that I can be the man you both deserve.

I can’t find the words to respond, so I blink away my teary eyes and give him the biggest smile I can muster. His shoulders relax and his smile joins mine.

“
So...” He holds my hand in his and runs a finger over the ring. “Does this mean you’re going to marry me?”

“Say yes
Momma! Say yes!” I laugh at Willow’s eagerness and look back up at Caleb.

“Yeah...” I peck him on the lips. “Of course I’ll marry you.” I say wrapping an arm around him, pulling a giggling Willow onto our laps.

Caleb and I are finally together again and at last my family is complete.

I am no longer broken.

The End…
For Now