A Convenient Husband (11 page)

‘I did?' Hell, why don't you just start purring, Tess? she asked herself bitterly. He's just virtually designated you an emotional disaster area and all you can think about is some throw-away remark that he probably only added to make you feel better!

She hardened her heart and her expression before she looked directly at him. ‘Pardon me,' she said coldly, ‘if I don't take advice from a man who thinks it's a good idea to fall in love with a married woman!' Remorse washed over her the instant the words were out of her mouth.

Eyes coldly angry, he grinned humourlessly back at her, displaying a set of perfect, even whiter than white teeth. ‘You do go for the jugular, don't you, angel?'

‘I'm sorr—'

‘Don't apologise, you're right. I think the children tipped the balance in the end.' If she was going to look at him as though he was a moral degenerate, he might as well give her the opportunity to look all the way down her cute nose—yes, it is, isn't it? he realized, looking at her small tip-tilted appendage with a surge of affection tinged with definite lust.

That had always been the way of it with Tess. One minute you wanted to strangle her—his eyes darkened as they automatically flickered to the smooth, pale length of her slender throat—the next you wanted…Rafe stiffened. Actually, until very recently he'd never wanted to do
that
before.

‘She has children…?' Tess gasped, looking shocked enough to fulfil even his cynical expectations.

‘Two. But aren't we straying off the subject? Now, let me think…what was it? I know, virginity.'

‘I wish you'd leave it alone,' she breathed wearily. ‘The fact is, I'm not terribly highly sexed.'

There wasn't even a trace of irony in her grave explanation. Rafe threw back his head and laughed. There was still mirth in his eyes when he'd managed to compose himself; the slashing white grin disappeared in deference to her icy disapproval.

‘You're a tonic, Tess.'

‘I'm so glad I've managed to brighten your day,' she responded frigidly.

Not to mention complicate my life, he amended silently. He had a gut certainty—Rafe relied heavily on gut certainty—that there were ramifications to this he hadn't even thought of yet!

‘It's not like I've been deliberately holding onto it or anything. Actually,' she continued, ‘I was in a fairly serious relationship and was on the point of…giving it away, as you so tastefully phrase it,' she snapped, ‘when the doctor told me about…that I couldn't…you know…I told Tom. It wasn't as if we were going to get married or anything, but I thought he had the right to know.' A faraway look entered her wide-spaced eyes as she recalled the events of five years earlier.

‘And
Tom
did what?' Rafe asked in that deceptively languid tone.

‘He said he was sorry, but…'

‘The creep dumped you!' Rafe ground out savagely.

Tess shrugged. ‘Illness really freaked him out. I know I wasn't ill, precisely, but he—'

‘Now I know where you got all these bloody stupid ideas from.'

‘Don't be silly, Rafe. I'm not denying I was hurt at the time, but it doesn't matter now. He did me a favour really—'

‘You mean he jumped off the nearest high building?' Rafe smiled in what Tess considered a sinister, scary way as he contemplated this scenario.

Rafe could make sinister look not only scary, but
sexy
too…Tess instinctively knew it would be a bad idea to follow that thought to its conclusion, especially when all she had to do was reach out to touch acres of golden firm flesh…

She jammed quivering fingertips under her knee and ran her tongue over the outline of her dry lips. ‘I mean,' she explained brusquely, ‘that it made me see how pointless it would be to get seriously involved with anyone when there could be no future. I thought about casual sex,' she confessed.

‘Don't we all?' he came back flippantly. Didn't casual imply a fun, relaxed, no headaches, no emotional trauma situation? The throb in his temples kicked up another notch as she began to idly chew a stray strand of rich reddish-tinged hair.

Once she'd even gone so far as to go clubbing with a friend whose idea of a good night out was to pick up an able and willing male—
any
able and willing male! It had taken Tess about half an hour to realise that it wasn't the route for her to go. She could think of better ways to prove she was as liberated as a man!

‘Only I haven't got the stomach for it.'

‘Until now.'

‘That was different.' She gritted her teeth and wished he'd stop being so tiresome about the entire business.

‘So you keep saying. Why? That's what I want to know.'

Don't we all? ‘I suppose you think I should have told you? The fact is, I didn't even think about it…actually, I wasn't thinking at all,' she amended wryly, recalling with a deep blush the frantic urgency that had gripped her. ‘Except about…you know…' She looked self-consciously away.

‘I know, all right,' he conceded drily. A man who had slept with a vulnerable virgin ought to feel like a first-class heel—Rafe had—but that feeling was fading fast as his sexual interest was being stirred…actually,
stirred
was a pretty anaemic description of the prowling hunger that was beginning to twist his guts into tortuous knots. He suddenly had a strong mental picture of some other faceless male taking over where he'd left off and the muscles in his belly cramped hard in fierce rejection. It wasn't in his nature to leave anything half finished.

‘It honestly wasn't an issue for me. I don't feel defiled or anything daft like that.' With a laugh designed to illustrate how lacking she was in neuroses, Tess firmly rejected this idea. ‘If you must know I feel liberated…empowered, even!' she elaborated, resorting to a humorously extravagant gesture. The gesture fell flat on its face at approximately the same moment the sheet slid down to her waist. She didn't feel particularly empowered as she scrabbled to pull it up again. ‘I should have done it years ago,' she gritted with determined and audibly forced humour.

Rafe was watching her with that dark, brooding, enigmatic expression of his.

‘All you had to do was ask.'

Tess's laughter was genuine this time, if tinged with bitterness. ‘What a whoppa!' she gasped. ‘You've never fancied me even slightly.' Which was probably the only reason their friendship had survived past puberty! ‘See,' she jeered, wagging her finger at him. ‘You can't deny it!'

He caught her finger and, holding her eyes with his own, raised it to his lips. He kissed the tip softly before he drew it slowly into his mouth. He sucked.

All her stomach muscles, including the deep neglected ones, contracted in unison. Tess's eyes darkened dramatically as she gave a deep, voluptuous sigh.

‘I keep telling you some things change.'

Not the sexiness of his voice…that was one of life's eternal features. ‘Not
that
much,' she croaked in a dazed, resentful whisper as she snatched her damp finger away. She suspected he was making fun of her.

‘Then why,' he enquired with unforgivable insight, ‘are you trembling?'

‘I'm not saying you're not attractive—especially,' she added drily, ‘when you try so hard.' Why, she wondered a little hazily, was he trying at all?

‘If you think that was trying, angel…'

‘All right, all right,' she responded, anxious to avoid any and all demonstrations of Rafe's seductive powers. ‘Let's take your stud status as read, shall we?' she offered sweetly.

‘Cow!' he countered affectionately.

‘When I needed someone, you were there.' And even if she had been the type to waste her tears over spilt milk, Tess knew she would never regret it. ‘But now is different.'

‘Now you know what you're doing,' he suggested quietly.

‘Exactly.' She couldn't help but feel slightly regretful that she was in full possession of her senses.

‘I'm going to remind you that you said that,' he responded cryptically. ‘The next time we make love,' he added, not at all cryptically, in response to her puzzled expression.

‘You're not suggesting we…we do this sort of thing on a…a…'

‘Regular basis?' The metal bed-frame shuddered as he disposed his long, lean frame comfortably beside her. ‘I can't think of any sensible reason not to.'

‘I can. I can think of several hundred!'

‘I said a
sensible
reason. We both have needs which are not being fulfilled anywhere else at the moment.'

‘As propositions go, that has all the old-fashioned charm of a demographic survey! I'm damned if I'm going to make myself available for you when you just happen to be in the area. It's so
demeaning
.' Tess gave a little shudder of distaste and didn't notice he'd grown rigid with anger. ‘I think what you need is a good old-fashioned mistress!'

Abruptly Rafe rolled over onto his side and firmly removed the sheet from her white-knuckled grasp; equally firmly he took hold of her slim thigh and tugged her down until they lay face to face. His eyes burnt with fierce determination as they swept over the slender length of her trembling body before coming to rest on her face.

‘What I need is you.'

Heat flooded her belly; tiny red dots danced before her eyes.

‘And you need me,' he announced with equal authority.

‘I know we didn't go out looking for this to happen, but it has.' He felt the tremor run through her body as he cupped one soft breast in his big hand. ‘I certainly wasn't looking to forget my problems in some sort of sexual frenzy,' he admitted hoarsely.

Frenzy! Had he really said frenzy? Tess was having trouble focusing on his lean dark face. She had never thought of herself as the type of female capable of inspiring frenzy in anyone. It was satisfying to have it confirmed that she hadn't been the only one to feel that way. She squirmed and said his name softly as his thumb rubbed gently over her tight, rigid nipple.

His next words suggested that Rafe was equally puzzled by this bizarre occurrence. ‘Neither was I expecting to find myself feeling this sort of attraction for anyone so soon—if ever—least of all you!'

Tess looked as though she had a nasty taste in her mouth. She was furious with herself for lying there passively letting him touch her how he wanted. Deep down, the idea of letting Rafe touch her how he wanted—how
she
wanted—was a dizzyingly exciting prospect.

She placed her hands on his shoulders and pushed hard, but to little effect. ‘That's where I have the advantage, Rafe,' she puffed. ‘I've always known you were shallow, but I can see the discovery has come as something of a shock to you…'

‘You could have some great fun exploring my shallows,' he promised with a wicked gleam in his eyes.

Tess gave a worried groan and stopped trying to budge his muscular bulk. ‘Don't you think this is getting a bit…
heavy
for a harmless flirtation?' she worried.

‘It got heavy for me about the same time you started to rip off my clothes.'

He had been pretty active on the ripping front, and Tess wasn't about to take the entire rap. ‘You were the one ripping.'

‘Talking of which.' He reached behind her and clicked free the crumpled bra which had stopped being supportive some time before. He held up the scrap of black lace before dropping it to the floor.

‘You're obviously on the rebound' she suggested, trying to sound confident and slightly amused about this. Her failure to sound anything but shakily breathless was mostly due to the fact his right arm had smoothly settled into a possessive position over her hip. His fingers moved restlessly over the soft skin of her modestly rounded behind. Her words might have had more impact if she hadn't responded so enthusiastically to the long, languid kiss he pressed to her slightly parted lips.

‘Far less dangerous to rebound in your direction, Tess, than a stranger who might think…'

‘It meant anything,' she finished dully, drawing the back of her hand angrily over her just-kissed lips. She couldn't wipe away the taste of him from her mouth.

‘Of course it means something.' His fingers moved in a series of graceful, gentle arabesques along the projections of her spine. Desire sharp and sweet clutched deep inside her.

‘It means I want you, and you want me.'

‘Aren't you presuming…?' Under her half-closed eyelids she watched with a sense of helplessness Rafe examine her aching breasts as they visibly responded to his statement. Small wonder he looked pretty smug!

‘Am I?'

It was an inconvenient time to discover she couldn't look him in the eye and lie. ‘You make it sound uncomplicated and simple…'