A Cowboy for Mom (6 page)

She snorted and shook her head. “Yeah, that happiness won’t
come. It was taken from me a long time ago.” She looked to Esther and said,
“You might want to put your words to him. I’ve never stopped loving him, but
obviously he stopped loving me a long-assed time ago.” She turned and walked
away. Maybe it was better that way.

“My God, are you stubborn, both of you. You damn well know
he loves you. He wouldn’t be letting you go when you’re so damned miserable
even being near him if he didn’t, you ungrateful woman. And you, you are
letting the only person you truly loved just leave out of some stupid need to
redeem yourself for the vile things your sister did? You are an idiot and an
ass and don’t deserve either one of those girls. Either you two fix this right
now and figure out your sister set this up long ago to ensure you never stayed
together, or I’m bloody well shooting you both.”

“What are you talking about, Esther?”
Carson
’s voice had a hard edge to it.

“That party, the one where you went crazy and yelled at her…”
the older woman sounded really hesitant suddenly. “Bev’s the one that set it
all up. She put the bug in your ear with all her talk of seeing Jennifer with
other guys and then arranged for that boy to grope her a little. She knew how
jealous you got in regard to her and arranged it so that you’d break up with
her publicly.”

“Why?” he hissed, sounding really pissed suddenly.

“Because she always had to be number one, you know that. We
both know that’s why you kept Jen away from her, to keep her from being exposed
to your sister’s venom. That’s why you never told Jennifer a damned thing about
your sister and you know it. Even then, you stubborn ass, you were protecting
that girl.”

“She’s right. God, I knew you had a sister but I never met
her and now I know why. She was a bitch to the utmost and highest regard,”
Jennifer told him. “And you are the only man that I’ve ever been with, the only
man that I’ve ever cared for, the only one that I’ve ever loved, and that bitch
took that from us. I’m really freaking damn glad that she’s not here, or I
likely would have to beat the hell out of her.”
Which was the
truth.
“So I guess the question is
,
do we let
her continue to win?”

He was staring at her, wary again, as Esther finally left
the porch and went inside the house. They
spent
 
a
long time just staring at one another
before he stepped off the porch and came toward her. Stuffing his hands in his
pockets, he looked down to where he was scuffing a boot in the dirt. “Don’t
go,” he said quietly, his body language screaming that he was ready for her to
hurt him again, was waiting for it.

She didn’t hesitate and stepped in closer to him. “I want
to stay, I want all of those years back,
Carson
.
I want you to get to know Carrie. She’s actually a pretty great kid,” she
admitted softly. “And looks just like your mom. I swear I’m shocked you didn’t
realize it sooner.” She shrugged and added, “Then again, the color of her hair
would throw anyone off, huh?” She heard the soft sound of a door and then
watched her daughter dragging their bags back into the house. “Well, looks like
I’m staying.” She wanted him. God, nothing had changed.
Nothing
at all.
She still wanted this man more than anything in her life. She
still loved him, with all her heart and soul.

He reached out to her but his hand hesitated slightly
before capturing the one she lifted to meet him. “I don’t remember what my mom
looked like,” he admitted. “Those weeks before the accident aren’t all I lost,
Jen. Even with the photos around the place, I have a hard time recalling faces
from memory. But the one thing I’ll never forget is how much I love you, how
much I’ll always love you.”

She moved in closer to him and wrapped her arms around his
neck. She looked up at him and smiled. “And I’ve always loved you too.” She
lifted her face to him. “I really think that you should kiss me, Carson
MacDonald, and then I think that we should go somewhere to have ‘alone’ time.
We have a lot of years to make up for.”

Blinking down at her, she felt his hands come to rest lightly
on her hips. “Are you sure, Jen?” he asked. “I don’t want you feeling like you
have to stay. I have no right to ask that and I don’t want you feeling guilted
into it for any reason. I want you here, for the rest of our days if I can
manage it, but I have to know.” His fingers tightened a little before he
whispered, “Please?”

“How about you shut up,
Carson
, and just kiss me? I’m exactly where I
have wanted to be for the last fifteen freaking years.” She tightened her hands
around his neck and pulled him closer. “Now, are you going to kiss me, love me
or not?”

Her answer was his lips meeting hers, in a hot and heavy
kiss. His hands slid to her ass and hauled her up against him tight as he
teased her mouth open and slid his tongue in deep to tease her own. A low growl
came from his chest and a hand slid into her hair, tugging her head back to
deepen the kiss.

Jennifer jumped into his arms, wrapping her legs around his
waist, and kissing him just as desperately. When she pulled back she was
panting. “Fifteen years has been far too long to go without making love. I need
you,
Carson
.
And please, God, do not tell me no,” she begged him. “Can we get to your room
or the barn, anywhere, I just need you,” she whispered.

“Room,” he said with a groan, squeezing her ass harder.
“But you’ll need to walk, love. I’d carry you but I could very well end up
embarrassing myself when we both fall down.” There was a story there, one she’d
have to get out of him eventually. He loosened his hold on her ass, only a
little though.

She
unwrapped
her legs from his
waist and slid down his body. “I will walk.” She slipped her hand into his and
added. “Just don’t ask me to let you go. I don’t want to wake up and this
be
a dream. I don’t want to lose this connection to you,
please?”

“Never.”
He
squeezed her fingers. Walking into the house, he locked up the front and led
her up the stairs. At her room he paused and tipped his head to the door. “Do
you want to check on her before we get into something entirely inappropriate
for her to know about?”

“I should, but knowing her she orchestrated this whole
mess.” She laughed. “She’s
been wanting
to get to know
you for awhile now. Tomorrow I will deal with our far too stubborn daughter. For
now, this is about us. Right?” she asked with uncertainty in her voice. “This
is what you want, right?”

Nodding, he tugged her with him to his room, thankfully a
full room away from the one where their daughter slept. Pushing the door shut
behind them, he dragged her into his body. Cupping her face, he lowered his
head and kissed her lightly.

She kissed him back, and the smile on her face was clear.
“Have I mentioned to you just how much I have missed this?” she asked quietly
and rubbed against him. “The last time we were together is the last time I was
with anyone, so it’s been a very long time for me.” It was best he knew now.
“But I’m pretty sure we have to get naked, right?” she asked with a grin.

“Naked, yes, definitely naked,” he said. Letting her go, he
pushed her back toward the bed. “I think you need to strip down right quick.”
He was working at his own shirt with one hand, the other on her belly, moving
her backward.

She began to strip, tossing her clothes willy-nilly around
the room. When the backs of her legs hit the bed she climbed up in it, kicking
her jeans off, and then pushing her panties off and tossing them as well. She
held her hand out to him and motioned for him to come closer. “
Carson
.” She whispered his name in utter and
complete reverence and love.

After he kicked off his jeans, he took her hand in his and
climbed up on the bed. With his body, he pushed her down into a reclined
position. His lips found hers, kissing her with hunger as he pressed closer,
his
body rubbing against hers.

Jen wrapped her legs around his hips, her arms around his
neck and pushed her body against him. “Carson, God, I need you honey,” she
whispered her admission to him. “I don’t think I’m going to last much longer.”

“Try,” he advised with a smile. “At least for a little
while,” he said. Nuzzling at her cheek, his mouth slowly trailed down her
throat to the hollow where he inhaled deeply. A low groan slid out of him as he
pulled her in closer to him. “I’ve missed you so much, Jen. If this is a dream,
please don’t ever wake me up.”

“Same here,” she whispered against the side of his neck.
She held on to him, her arms clenching him so tightly that he might just
squeak, but didn’t. “I’ve missed you, Carson. Every day I wanted to call you,
each moment I wanted to send you a message.” She whispered her confession to
him and lifted slightly. “Please, no more teasing us,” she begged him.

Holding her tight, he kissed her lightly on the neck. “No
more teasing,” he promised, giving her another little squeeze. Then he tugged
back slightly and made a face. “But I should probably attempt to see if there’s
a condom somewhere in the house that I can dust off.”

“I’m on birth control. I wasn’t when we got pregnant before
but I am now and have been for years. You have been my only lover so there
shouldn’t be a question of disease.” She shook her head. “But if it makes you feel
better, yes, please find a condom.
Soon.
Very soon.”

He chewed his lip as he stared down into her eyes, obviously
weighing the options, one of which meant getting up out of the bed and trying
to find a condom. He looked around the room with a frown and then down at her.
“I’d rather not have to hunt one down since I’m more than sure I’ll have to go
to the bunkhouse to find one. I haven’t really had any interest in being with
anyone but you and I know I’m clean. The four billion tests they like running on
me yearly tell me that much for sure.”

That had her smiling and she pulled him closer. “Then I
really think that you and I should perhaps get busy. Later, if you want to
change to using a condom you can, but right now, right
now,
I need you,”
she whispered softly. “Love me, Carson.”

Tipping her chin up, he kissed her, his fingers drifting
over her throat and down. Cupping a breast, he squeezed lightly, flicking his
thumb over the tight nub as he settled over her a little more. Sucking on her
lower lip, he nipped gently before kissing her again, his attention moving to
her other breast as he shifted his weight.

“God, that feels amazing.” She had her hands fisted in his
hair, her head arched back, and eyes closed. She was soaking up the
feelings,
the connection to him that she had was more than
physical as well. “
Carson
.”
She whimpered his name, begging him to finally bring them together.

“Soon,” he said quietly. His lips were moving down her
throat and over her chest toward her breasts. Then his mouth wrapped around a
nipple and sucked, hard. Rolling the tight bud against the roof of his mouth,
his hands kept moving. They were lower now, stroking over her hips and thighs.
One slid between her legs to cup her pussy, a finger sliding through her slick
folds and flicking her clit lightly.

“Jesus,” she whimpered, and her whole body quaked in
pleasure at his touch. “
Carson
.”
She couldn’t seem to find more to say than his name and crying out in pleasure.
This was all so much, too much, but not enough. Her hands moved from his
shoulders and head, if he was going to tease her, she sure as hell was going to
tease him! She moved her hands slowly down his chest, fingers gently tracing
his nipples, and then further down to the turgid and ready flesh of his penis.
She grinned as she closed her hands around
it,
the
look on his face, the sheer shock in his features was a pleasure in and of
itself. “More,” she demanded softly.

Her answer to the demand was two of his fingers thrusting
into her pussy and a kiss of teeth to her nipple. Switching to her other breast,
he sucked hard on the bud as he thrust his fingers in and out of her body. His
thumb was rubbing over her clit, the work rough and had just enough texture to
send shivers through her body.

Jennifer couldn’t hold on another moment. Her hands
squeezed his penis
tightly,
she shivered, and gave up
the orgasm that was tripping through her. She screamed as she came. God, she
knew that was something she needed to hold back on but she couldn’t, she
screamed as she came, loudly.

His laugh of pleasure was slightly pained and he had to pry
her fingers from his cock. Dropping a kiss to her belly, he moved lower still,
keeping his member out of her reach as he brushed kisses lower and lower. Then
his mouth was on her clit, his tongue flicking out to tease the tight bud, his
fingers still pumping in and out of her.

Jennifer lifted her ass from the bed and fisted her hands
in his longish hair. She shivered and wiggled under him. “
Carson
.” She begged him. “Jesus, you are
killing me here, honey. I need you. God bless, I need you to fill me up.” She
was close to coming again, damn, she was so very close.