A Hard Day's Knight (34 page)

Beyond the Door, endless grasslands stretched away under a perfect blue sky, with no sign of civilisation or cultivation anywhere. A gentle breeze wafted through the Door, smelling of every sunny day we ever dreamed of. I could hear birds singing, and the far-away sounds of animals on the move. But otherwise, it was a very quiet, very peaceful world. We all crowded together, peering through the open Door.

“So peaceful,” said King Arthur. “Like Eden itself, before the Fall, untouched by human hand.”

“What better place for the elves?” I said. “What better place for a new start?”

“If they’ll take it,” said Suzie. “They don’t think like we do or value the things we do. They’re not human.”

“They want the Earth,” said Arthur. “And this is an Earth. Only without all those irritating humans to get in the way. They’ll take it.”

“But if they don’t?” said Kae.

Arthur looked suddenly tired. “You heard Merlin. If the elves cannot be made to see sense ... then raise the Armies of Man and lead them against the elves, until one or other of us is gone forever. I would prefer to avoid that if I can.”

“But would the elves prefer to avoid it?” said Kae. “There is a part of them that has always loved war.”

“They love survival more,” Arthur said shortly.

He gestured sharply to the Doormouse, who quickly shut the Door and spun the brass lock. He looked at King Arthur.

“I can’t recall anyone ever wanting to visit that Earth before. Calm and quiet and peaceful aren’t the kind of things people usually look for in the Nightside.”

“Their loss,” said Arthur. “Understand me, Sir Mouse; no-one is to have access to this Door until I return. Is that clear?”

The Doormouse bobbed his head in a perfect frenzy of agreement. “Of course, Your Majesty, of course. I’ll put an OUT OF ORDER sign on it. Shall we now proceed to the Castle Inconnu Door? We’re almost there, and the other large armoured gentleman is growling at me.”

“Don’t scare the mouse, Kae,” said Arthur. “That’s my job.”

We finally came to the Door, and the Doormouse opened it. Kae led the way through because it was his castle, after all. We appeared in a fairly unremarkable side corridor, with no-one round, and the Door slammed shut behind us and disappeared. Kae growled something under his breath, then led us quickly to the nearest communication point. Which turned out to be a simple office, filled with computers. Arthur was fascinated with all the technology and bumbled around, having a good look and touching things he shouldn’t, while Kae put out a general alert, ordering everyone to appear in the Main Hall, right then, no exceptions. Sir Roland appeared, on the run, and stuck his head through the door. His eyebrows practically jumped off his head when Kae introduced him to King Arthur, and he was down on both armoured knees in a moment, bowing his head to the returned King.

“Up, up, my good friend,” Arthur said easily. “You are my knights, sworn to serve my cause and my dream. I should kneel to you, for keeping it alive all these centuries.”

Sir Roland clambered quickly to his feet again and glared at Kae. “Would it have killed you to have given us a little advance warning? We could have prepared a proper welcome!”

“Such things can wait,” said Arthur. “The elves have brought war to the Nightside, and we are going to ride forth and teach them a lesson in manners. Lead the way to the Main Hall, Sir Roland. I would have words with the London Knights.”

Sir Roland bobbed his head quickly in a way that reminded me irresistibly of the Doormouse, and led us all to the Main Hall of Castle Inconnu. He was clearly bursting with questions he wanted to put to King Arthur, but Kae kept him busy with questions about the readiness of the knights to go to battle at such short notice. Sir Roland was still answering questions when we got to the hall. Suzie and I brought up the rear. I was starting to feel left out, as though having delivered Excalibur, my part in the story was over. It was Arthur’s story now, and Suzie and I were bit players. Except, the story wasn’t over yet, and I didn’t think Arthur was going to find things as easy as he thought. He was going to fight elves in the Nightside; and neither the elves nor the Nightside was anything like what he remembered of them.

Arthur might have dreamed England’s history; but the Nightside has always been outside history.

When we finally hurried into the Main Hall, it seemed like everyone in the Castle was already there, waiting for us. The knights in their armour, arrayed in solid shining ranks, along with all the other people who made the castle run, and their families. Because no-one wanted to miss this. The Main Hall was packed from wall to wall, with women and small children peering in through the open doorways because there wasn’t room for them. When King Arthur stepped up onto the empty platform at the end of the hall, a great roar went up from everyone. They cheered and shouted, they slammed their hands together and stamped their feet on the floor, all of them grinning so hard it must have hurt their faces. The King had returned, something they had dreamed of all their lives but never really believed would happen in their lifetimes. The knights drew their swords and thrust them into the air, again and again. And still the cheering went on, as though it would never stop.

King Arthur stood at the front of the platform, looking out over the crowd, nodding in approval at the ranks of armoured knights. Kae stood at his side, smiling proudly at his brother, gesturing for quiet so the King could speak. Suzie and I stood at the back. This wasn’t our moment.

“Want me to fire my shotgun into the ceiling?” Suzie said innocently into my ear. “That should quiet them down.”

“Better not,” I said. “It might be misinterpreted.”

King Arthur thrust one hand up, and immediately all the sound stopped as though someone had thrown a switch. The whole hall fell silent, to hear what he had to say. King Arthur lowered his hand and nodded solemnly.

“It’s good to be back,” he said. “But I’m not here to bask in your adulation. Later, maybe. For now, there is work to be done. An army of elves has gone to war against Humanity, in the Nightside, indulging in their love of brigandry and slaughter. This cannot be allowed. They must be stopped. I ride out. Who rides with me?”

Everyone there roared approval and agreement, and the knights thrust their swords into the air again. No-one questioned him. He was King Arthur, and they were his. And as simply as that, the London Knights went to war.

Sir Roland happily took over the logistics of getting so many people ready for action, while Arthur and Kae discussed how best to get their army to the Nightside. I saw a chance to be useful again. If only because I didn’t like the idea of a whole army of men in armour on the loose in the Nightside. I wanted to be sure everyone understood that only the elves were the enemy. King Arthur immediately saw what I was getting at, but I kept my eyes on Kae. Arthur might be King, but Kae was Grand Master of the London Knights. And the knights and the Nightside have never been on the best of terms. We had so little in common.

“My knights will behave themselves,” Kae said flatly. “We’re there to save people from the elves, not trample everyone underfoot indiscriminately. Any one of my people steps out of line, I’ll have his balls.”

“All right,” I said. “How are you planning to get your knights into the Nightside? You’ll never get all your horses through the Underground stations, and there’s a limit to how many I can transport through my watch.”

I stopped because Kae was looking at me in a very superior way.

“We have our own dimensional doorways, Mr. Taylor. For when we ride to war on other worlds, in other dimensions. They won’t work anywhere on Earth because that’s Drood territory. But the Nightside isn’t on Earth, technically, so we can be there in moments.”

“If you can enter the Nightside anytime you choose,” I said slowly, “why haven’t you?”

“I told you,” said Kae. “We deal with bigger issues. We fight our wars across all Space and Time, to protect Humanity from the Forces that threaten it. We’re not here to spank people because they misbehave. We’re only getting involved now because of the elves, and because Arthur wants it. Personally, I could watch the whole Nightside burn to the ground and not shed a single tear. Nasty little place.”

“Kae!” Arthur said immediately. “My knights have always defended those in need, wherever they may be! Or have you only kept alive those parts of my dream that suited you?”

“Sorry, Arthur. But this is the Nightside we’re talking about ...”

“It’s the elves,” Arthur said flatly. “Nothing else matters.”

“Of course, Arthur. You’re right, as always.”

“You are talking about our home, Kae,” said Suzie, and something in her voice drew Arthur’s and Kae’s attention immediately. I’ve always admired the way Suzie can become very dangerous, very quickly, often without even having to raise her voice. She gave Kae her best cold glare, and he stood very still as she addressed him in her cool, calm, and really quite deadly tone. “The Nightside is necessary. It serves a purpose, for those of us who can’t all be perfect. I wouldn’t live anywhere else. And, I want to make it very clear that I don’t have any patience for
To save the village we had to destroy it
tactics. The knights go in, they kick the crap out of the elves, then they get the hell out. Or I will take it very personally. Is that clear?”

“You can’t speak to the King like that!” said Kae, honestly shocked.

“Kae,” said Arthur, and Kae immediately shut up again. Arthur smiled on Suzie. “There can’t be much wrong with the Nightside these days if it can produce warriors like you and John Taylor. We ride out to rescue your people as well as punish the elves. Will you walk with me and discuss the best tactics to use in the Nightside? You know the situation better than any of us.”

They moved off together, cheerfully discussing death and destruction. Kae and I wandered after them.

“You know,” said Kae, “that is one seriously scary girlfriend you have there.”

“You have no idea,” I said. “Trust me.”

Not all that long afterwards, we were all assembled in a massive courtyard the size of two or maybe even three football fields, surrounded by tall stone walls, open to a starless and moonless night sky. I wasn’t sure whether we were outside or not. I wasn’t even sure if we were still in the castle. The knights were readying themselves for war with practiced ease and easy camaraderie. They wore brightly coloured tabards over their armour, with various stylised symbols on their chests and backs to identify which groups they belonged to. Their horses waited patiently, huge muscular brutes, tossing their proud heads and snorting loudly, armoured and caparisoned, with brightly coloured plumes on their foreheads. A small army of grooms bustled round them, fussing over them and seeing to their needs. Armourers moved amongst the knights in much the same way, checking their armour and weapons. Suzie, surprisingly, was enchanted by the huge horses and moved happily amongst them, feeding them bits of carrot and murmuring happy nonsense to them. Girls and their ponies ...

Kae gave the order to mount up, and the knights were quickly in their saddles. And despite what we’ve all seen in films, they didn’t need little step-ladders, or have to be lowered onto the backs of their horses. The London Knights had spent most of their lives learning how to move easily in their armour. They mounted their horses as though it was something they did every day of their lives, and for all I know, they did. They put on their plumed helmets and immediately became anonymous and coldly intimidating. The horses bore the weight easily. Many of them were stamping their hoofs on the cobbled ground, impatient to be off.

Suzie and I had been given our own horses, so we wouldn’t be left behind. I’d been assured they were very old, very calm horses, with excellent manners. I got up into the saddle with a little help from a groom who happened to be passing. Suzie vaulted up with more enthusiasm than grace, and looked round her proudly. Kae steered his horse in beside me, on his way to somewhere more important. He was in full armour, and it suited him far more than the grey suit ever had.

“Try to keep up and don’t get in the way.”

He was gone before I could come up with a suitably cutting rejoinder. I took the reins in a firm grasp to show the horse I knew what I was doing. He turned his great head all the way round, gave me a long, thoughtful stare, and turned his head away again.

“You have to let him know who’s in charge,” said Suzie.

“I think he already knows,” I said.

Kae brought forward a massive white charger for Arthur, almost half as big again as all the other horses. Arthur smiled and patted the horse on its muzzle, and I swear the horse actually bowed its head to him. Arthur had that effect on everyone. He swung easily up and onto the saddle, took the reins in one mailed hand, and then raised his free hand. Immediately, every sound in the courtyard cut off. Even the horses fell silent.

“It is time,” said Arthur. “Open the gateway, Kae. We ride to battle.”

Kae stood up in his stirrups and made a series of quick, abrupt mystical gestures at the far end of the courtyard. He looked every inch the brutal warrior who’d come so close to killing Suzie and me, back in the sixth-century Strangefellows. I trusted Arthur, but I still wasn’t entirely sure about Kae. I’d liked him a lot better when he was pretending to be Sir Gareth. I missed Gareth; I felt I understood him a lot better than I did Kae. But was Sir Gareth a mask worn by Kae; or was it possibly the other way round? I’d find out soon enough. Nothing like going to war to show you who people really are.

Arthur urged his horse forward, Kae right there at his side. The many ranks of mounted knights moved silently after him; and Suzie and I brought up the rear. Everyone else had disappeared from the courtyard. They’d done everything they could. The only sound was the steady rumble of thunder as hundreds of horses moved across the cobbled ground. A giant doorway stood before us, a simple door-frame some thirty feet tall and twenty wide, full of swirling mists, exactly like the one Prince Gaylord the Damned and his dark knights used, back in Sinister Albion. I think I would have said ... something, but Arthur drew Excalibur from its scabbard, the long blade blazing brightly against the gloom. He urged his horse forward and plunged into the open doorway, and all the army went with him.