A Life Restored (8 page)

“Thank you, Yu.”
 
He smiled in return.

“I go get ha.”

A few minutes later, Betty ambled over with two heaping plates of food.
 
Biscuits with chipped beef and gravy.
 
His stomach growled as she set the plates before him and Snake.

“Snake,” she greeted.
 
Then reaching out for Ben’s hand she gave a squeeze and a very warm smile. “Ben.”

“Betty.”
 
He smiled back, surprised at her intimate gesture.

“I hope you don’t have to hurry back to the ranch,” she said, chocolate brown eyes pleading.
 
“I’d very much like a chance to visit.”

“You’re our last stop for the day.
 
Suppose we can stay for a bit,” he replied with a wink.

Pink tickled her cheeks.
 
“Good.
 
Cause I want to hear everything about baby James.”

Clutching a hand to his chest, he said, “And here I thought ya were beginning to like me.
 
Now I find I’m just a messenger bringing news of yer adopted grandson.”

“Yes, well, anyone bringing me news of baby James might get a treat—in the form of blackberry pie.
 
So I’m sure it will be worth it.”

“Mmm.
 
I can taste it already.”

Waving her hand in the air, she turned to serve her other customers.

“I think she’s sweet on you,” Snake said between large bites of biscuits and gravy.

Shifting uncomfortably in his seat, Ben stuffed a biscuit in his mouth.
 
It was one thing for him and Betty to tease each other.
 
He just didn’t like anyone else jumping to conclusions.

Of course he liked Betty.
 
Everyone did.
 
She liked him—well, she liked everyone.
 
That didn’t mean she was sweet on him like Snake suggested.

Quit lyin’.
 
Ya know she don’t squeeze just any body’s hand when she serves ‘em dinner.

Ben shoved more food in his mouth to stifle a sigh.
 
Maybe he was lonelier than he wanted to admit.
 
Twenty-five years was a long time.

Living with a bunch of sixteen to twenty year olds was, well, getting old.
 
Most of them horsed around all the time.
 
They needed steady guidance.
 
Half of Will’s men were fairly green, though they didn’t see themselves that way. Two or three years hardly counted as experience.
 
They still had a lot of learning to do about ranching and about life.

While his evenings weren’t quiet—there was always a few of the men in a tizzy over one thing or another—he longed for the quiet.
 
He was tired of acting as a father to the boys.
 
Tired of breaking up fights.
 
Tired of reminding them to bathe every now and then.
 
He wished he could have his own place.
 
But then that might be a bit more quiet than he could handle.
 
Maybe it would be better if he had someone to share it with.

Naw.
 
That would require opening up parts of himself that were better off tucked away.

Why couldn’t he just be content with life as it always was?
 
Just keep plugging on one day at a time.

As the dining hall crowd started to thin out, Snake rose.
 
“Think I’ll catch me a game or two of cards.”

“Meet ya over at Hardy’s store in ‘bout an hour.
 
He should have our supplies ready by then.
  
We’ll load up and be home just in time for supper.”

“Sounds good,” Snake agreed, leaving Ben as the lone diner in the room.

Betty appeared in the doorway of the kitchen with two plates in hand.
 
One had a piece of pie on it.
 
The other looked to be her meal.
 
As she slid the pie in front of him, warmth flooded his body.
 
She had a way of disarming all his defenses without even trying.

“Now,” she said taking a seat directly across from him, “tell me all about baby James.”

He allowed the brief stab of pain in his heart, over the loss of his own Elijah, before he recovered and began regaling her with the latest tales of baby James.

Chapter 10

Betty listened intently as Ben began describing her grandson’s latest mannerisms and noises, despite having caught his brief frown.
 
No, frown wasn’t the right word for it.
 
Seems like Benjamin Shepherd might be hiding some pain.
 
Well, eventually she would get to the bottom of that.
 
Just not today.

As she finished her last bite of food, she said, “Thank you, Ben.
 
I can’t tell you how much I appreciate hearing what little James is up to.
 
I so miss being around my grandchildren.”

“How many do you have?”

“Oh, let’s see.
 
Catherine, my oldest girl, has two boys and one girl.
 
Nancy has three girls and one boy.
 
And Frank, I think his wife just delivered their third boy.”
 
An unexpected moment of sadness brought tears to the corners of her eyes.

Ben reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze.
 
“Must be hard being away from ‘em.”

Allowing a half-smile to grace her lips, she retrieved her handkerchief from her shirt sleeve.
 
Seems she would cry at the drop of a pin these days.
 
“It is hard.
 
They are all back in Missouri.
 
I had no idea I would miss them all so much.”

Pushing away his empty plate, he asked with a wink, “Not that I’m complaining for one minute, but how come ya moved west?”

Betty was surprised she never mentioned it before now.
 
They had talked often over the last year and somehow her reasons for moving must have never come up.

“When Paul talked about moving to the Arizona Territory in search of gold, I tried to talk him out of it.
 
Seems the idea only took deeper root the more I argued against it.

“He’s such a good son and has done more than he had to—keeping the farm going after Henry died.
 
He sacrificed so much for me and his sisters and brother.
 
I just couldn’t stand being at odds with him on this issue.
 
So I took it the Lord.

“At first, I just prayed that He would change Paul’s mind and make him happy with his life in Missouri.
 
I even tried to take things into my own hands by pushing a young lady or two his way.

“Nothing changed his mind.
 
In fact, he started talking about how I should come with him.
 
I thought he was crazy.
 
I mean whatever would I do with myself in the wilderness?
 
He just looked at me with those blue eyes, so much like Henry’s, and he smiled.
 
He said, ‘Start a boardinghouse.’”

Ben’s smile turned into a deep chuckle.
 
“So that’s what ya did.”

“Yes.
 
Though it wasn’t as easy as all that.
 
I fought for a while.
 
I asked the Lord why he would want me to move west.
 
He told me that I had more children to care for.
 
I never did understand what He meant—until Hannah’s first husband died.
 
Then I realized Hannah was one of my children.
 
‘Course she wasn’t by birth.
 
But she was one of my spiritual children.
 
And I believe the Lord wanted me to be here for her.

“Then I met Will.
 
And I thought, ‘Here’s a nice cowboy, maybe a bit lonely.
 
I bet he could use a spiritual mama too.’
 
So, I decided he must be one of those children the Lord had in mind for me to care for.

“And then Julia came.
 
I think she needed a mama the most.
 
Then there’s Thomas.”

She paused, as it dawned on her he should have been back already from his last run.
 
She made a mental note to talk to Paul later.

“He’s hurting over his brother’s death.
 
Guess maybe Paul has been better for him than I have.”

Ben nodded his head.
 
“Ya been good for all of them—including Thomas.”

Though his words were sincere, Betty sensed he was struggling with something.
 
He was too old for her to be his spiritual mother.
 
Perhaps in his case the Lord was just calling her to be his friend.

“Anyway.
 
So here I am.
 
Some of it was for Paul, too.
 
He’s always been there for me.
 
I thought it was time for me to sacrifice something for him.”

“Surely he didn’t ask ya to leave yer children and grandchildren?”

“No.
 
He didn’t.
 
But the Lord did.
 
I suppose it was for the best.
 
Seems Catherine’s husband was concerned they would have to take me in when Paul left.
 
He’s a nice boy, but he felt I would interfere too much with how he wanted to raise his children.
 
He was probably right.
 
I wouldn’t have been happy with his controlling discipline.
 
Without love, his form of punishment seemed too harsh to me.”

The silence stretched for a minute before a smile stretched across Ben’s bearded face.
 
“Yer quite a woman, Betty Lancaster.”

Heat graced her cheeks.
 
“Now, I worry about Paul.
 
I just want to see him settle down.
 
Find a good woman and enjoy some happiness for a change.”

Taking her hand, he gave a gentle squeeze.
 
“I’m sure it’ll happen in time.”

The clock on the wall chimed twice, riveting Ben’s gaze.

Hastily he stood to his feet.
 
“I best get on outta here.
 
Should’ve already met Snake at Hardy’s and been halfway home.”

Reaching out to stop him, Betty said, “I hope you’ll at least bring in my beef before you go.”

Red flushed his cheeks above his brown and gray beard.

“Sorry.
 
I’ll get the crates now.”

Turning on his heel, he rushed out the front door.
 
Within seconds he had two crates of Colter beef stacked one on top of the other in his arms.

“Don’t hurt yourself.”
 
She mothered him, concerned he was carrying too much.

As she hurried to unload the crates, he said, “I almost forgot to tell ya.
 
Hannah sends her love.
 
She told me to let ya know they’re planning on coming in for church on Sunday.
 
Said James is old enough that it’ll be okay.”

Taking the last item from the crate she smiled at him, her joy overflowing.
 
“Oh, tell her to stay for dinner with us after.
 
I so want to catch up with her.”

Ben nodded.
 
Then touching his fingers to the edge of his hat, he said, “Ma’am.”

“Benjamin,” she called after him.
 
“Shall we set a place for you at Sunday dinner, too?”

She didn’t miss the slight fear in his eyes before his face fell into a shadow.

“Ah… sure… I’d like that.”
 
He recovered before jumping up into the wagon, leaving his horse tied in front of the dining hall for now.

Betty waved after him as he maneuvered the wagon down the street in front of Hardy’s store.
 
An annoyed Snake paced back and forth on the boardwalk.
 
Hopefully, Abraham Conrad had their order ready so Ben and Snake could load it and head on home.

Turning back into the dining hall, she headed into the kitchen.
 
Looked like Liang and Yu already took care of all the dinner dishes.
 
So, Betty stepped out the back door from the kitchen into the grassy area where laundry hung drying in the sun.
 
She touched the edge of a sheet.
 
It felt almost dry.

Returning back to the kitchen, she set several irons on the stovetop to heat.
 
Grinding some coffee, she dumped the grounds into the coffee pot and filled it with water.
 
Then she propped open the back door with a large rock.

The big puffy white clouds in the sky made the August afternoon warmer than she liked.
 
Though it didn’t look like rain was coming, the humidity was up judging by the way her shirt clung to her back.
 
Ironing those sheets would be quite a chore this afternoon.

Once the coffee finished brewing, she poured herself a cup and took a seat at the small table in the kitchen, reflecting on her afternoon with Ben Shepherd.

As far as she knew, he’d never been married, though she admitted to never asking the question.
 
Something in the way he carried himself made her think that.
 
And something in his expression when he was talking about James contradicted it.
 
That look.
 
It was almost as if he knew the pain of losing a child.

Draining the last of her coffee, Betty stood and retrieved the first of several sheets from the line.
 
Laying it out on the table, she grabbed an iron.
 
As she pushed the heavy metal across the fabric, she hummed one of her favorite hymns, watching the wrinkles in the fabric smooth.

Lord, I don’t know what that man is carrying around in his heart.
 
But he looks sad to me.
 
I ask that you would push into his heart and heal his brokenness.
 
If you have a mind to use me in the process, so be it.
 
Thank you for your grace and mercy.

Her prayers moved on from Ben Shepherd to her son Paul.
 
Some time ago, perhaps it was after Henry passed, she took the verse literally when it said to turn her worries into petitions.
 
As she ironed these sheets, or made the beds in the bunkhouses, or prepared supper, her conversation with the Lord continued on.

She asked Him to bring Paul a woman, a wife meant just for him.
 
She had been asking for years—he was thirty-four now, but she would keep on asking.
 
When the good Lord decides to answer, she would pray for her son’s wife by name, just as she did for Catherine, Nancy, and Frank.

Sweet Hannah Colter came to her mind.
 
So she asked the Lord for his protection over Hannah and her family.
 
She asked Him to keep the union between Hannah and Will strong, helping them overcome any obstacles in their way.

Then her prayers turned toward Julia Colter and Adam Larson.
 
Such a sweet couple.
 
They were so in love, but Julia still was recovering from the painful events that led her here.
 
Betty prayed that the Lord would continue his healing in the young woman’s heart and that He would direct her and Adam when they should marry.

So caught up in her prayers, Betty failed to hear Paul enter the kitchen.
 
She startled when he spoke.

“Need some help, Ma?”

“Back already?”

“I saw you rubbing your hand this morning.
 
Figured you could use some help.”

She tried to hide it from him.
 
But her hand had been rather stiff lately.
 
She found the best way to get in motion was to rub it for a few minutes before starting breakfast.

Taking the last of the ironed sheets, she handed the stack to Paul.
 
As they walked towards the Mother Lode, one of the bunkhouses, she asked, “How was the mining today?”

Balancing the stack of sheets in one brawny arm, he held the door open with the other.
 
“Not much from panning.
 
I think I’m going to have to build some sifters and start working the ground.”

Pulling the first sheet from the stack, she shook it out and made the lowest bed on the bunk while Paul continued.

“Have you heard anything from Thomas?”

“No.
 
He should have been back by now.”

“Maybe he was delayed leaving out of Wickenburg.”

“Hmm.
 
I’ll make up his bunk anyway—in case he gets in later this evening.”

“Heard Ben was in town today.
 
How was your visit?”

Thankfully, her head ducked under the bunk as she reached across to tuck in the sheet.
 
Her son would not be able to see the pink flushing her face.

“What makes you think we had a visit?”

“Ma-aa,” he said stretching the word for two or three syllables.
 
“Everyone sees how you two look at each other.
 
Neither one of you is fooling anyone.
 
‘Cept maybe yourselves.”

As she finished making the lower bunk she stretched to her full height rubbing her low back.
 
“It was fine.”

“Just fine?”

“Well, he might come to church on Sunday with Hannah and Will.”