A Lover's Wish (14 page)

It was large, with rocks leading down slightly to the water that heat danced lazily upward from. Kianna’s mouth watered to be in it and it seemed as though Dao was reading her mind. He began undoing her shirt from behind. When the material gave, she lifted her hands out so that he could push the clothes off.

When she was fully naked, he stripped as well and led her down the path. She smiled lovingly up at him. When he lowered her into the water, she

moaned in satisfaction and moved into his arms. Wrapping her arms around his neck, Kianna pushed upward. “Can I please kiss you now? Is it disrespectful if I….”

Dao’s lips were hungrily on her. His arms pulled her tighter, crushing her into his body. The kiss felt to Kianna as though he was drowning and she was his only way to survive. She dug into his hair, moaning and tightening her fingers. He growled and lifted her slightly. That caused her legs to spread and when he lowered her, she sat astride him. Kianna slid further into Dao’s body, her softness pressing against his naked arousal. Shifting her body, he entered her and Dao’s mouth was ripped from hers. His head tossed back, his eyes widened and he growled at the full moon.

Kianna smiled as she rode him, slow at first, but as he began pushing upward and into her, her hips moved faster and faster. She whispered his name and pressed her breasts into his chest. His large hands moved down to her bum and began pushing her down against him even harder. Deeper and deeper he went until she began climaxing around him.

“Oh, Kianna,” Dao whispered before kissing her savagely. “I’ve missed you…”

She started pulling away from him, his arms greedily reached for and brought her back into his lap. With her back to him, Dao impaled her again.

Wrapping her hair around his arm, he forced her to ride him.

“Harder,” Dao whispered against her earlobe.

When she complied, Dao whispered something in Cantonese, but she didn’t care what it was. It sounded so sexy that her eyes rolled into her head. A purring sound escaped her throat as her back arched until her head rested against his shoulders. When he released her hair and reached around, a satisfied smiled spread across her face as he began massaging her breasts. The nipples were hard and tender. She began trembling against him again.

“Let it go, Kiki,” he growled in her ear.

She clutched at his arm, digging her nails in as another orgasm stormed her body. His arms tightened around her and his mouth pressed into her neck. She knew he was going to explode. She felt it the moment it happened. He stiffened beneath her in the warm of the water. His growl tore through the air, clouding her senses further.

Dao felt as though he had just purged his soul. He didn’t remember ever having an orgasm that powerful before and he was happy it was with Kianna. She had tightened around his arousal and Dao had literally lost his mind. She left his body weak and he craved that. He had missed her

terribly when his father died and he couldn’t touch her.

As he held her against him, he felt her shiver so he moved his body to a lower seat in the warm water so that the water was covering her up to the neck. Then he caressed her back gently and they both sat there in silence. For a long while, he listened to his heart pounding in his ears. Emotions were welling up inside until he felt as though he was going to explode. “Kianna.” he whispered.

“Yeah, babe?”

“I am going to say something to you,” Dao spoke not sure if he should. “I know that this may not be what you want to hear and if it’s not, then I’m sorry, but I have to let it out.”

She stiffened and turned to look up into his face.

He saw fear in her eyes and wondered why she was scared.

“You want to end it?” her voice cracked.

“No. Not by a long shot. That poem, my friend told me that I was only supposed to use it when I met the person who I wanted to be with…
the
person.”

“I don’t understand.” Kianna shifted again. “What I wanted to say was that
Ngo oi ney,

Kianna. So much that when dad died and I couldn’t bury myself within you, I almost died. I

got it so bad for you that I feel being able to have you hold me again saved me from a fate that’s worse than anything I can think of. Kianna, I love you…”

Silence flowed between them and Dao felt as though it had been a forever since he had confessed his love to this woman. She said nothing, but caressed his face. He wanted words, needed the words. He wished she would tell him to go to hell or something—anything. Her eyes were unreadable, her body language was on mute and he just sat there, still, stiff and dying slowly on the inside, waiting for her answer. He was on the brink of putting her away from him and walking away.

“
Ngo oi ney
, too.”

Dao laughed and wrapped her in his arms again, “You scared the crap out of me,” he admitted. “I thought you were gonna send me packing.”

“The waiting is always the worse part,” she spoke with laughter in her voice. “But I love you, too. I know that now.”

Dao kissed her again and the two remained where they were, in the position they were in, for another little bit before heading back. He was beginning to feel guilty that he had taken time out to be with Kianna and not remain by his mother’s side. He did not mention it to Kianna, he simply

looked for her towel and led her from the water. He patted her dry, then helped her dress before he dressed himself.

“I’ve never had a man dress me before.” She smiled brightly at him. “Your father—did he give me his blessings?”

Dao brushed a knuckle gently over her cheek. “Yes. He gave you his blessings to be my wife— but that shouldn’t pressure you into anything.”

“I know…”

“You should get some sleep,” Dao whispered as they walked back inside. “I want you to get some sleep.”

“I know. I don’t think I could sleep.”

“But you barely slept since you’ve gotten here.

You took a nap in my lap so you must be tired.” She stopped at the door.

Dao willingly allowed her to pull him by the front of his shirt into her arms. Wrapping his free arm around her, he kissed her, long and hard. When he lifted his head to breathe, he smiled down at her. “Please. You can sleep in my old room.”

“Where are you going to sleep?”

“I’ll be fine. I have some things I need to think about.”

“About me?”

He caressed her cheek. “Partly. But I have to think of what I’m going to do about Ma.”

“She doesn’t want to leave, Dao. I don’t think you could get her to.”

Dao nodded. “I know.” He kissed her. “Get some sleep, huh?

She opened her mouth again.

Dao just knew she was going to give him a hard time. Before she could speak again, he plunged his tongue into the heat of her mouth. She moaned and slumped against him.

D

ao didn’t sleep that night. He spent the night praying by the candles and incense, spending time with his father. Somewhere along the way, Dao had fallen out of touch with his culture, with his father. How had that happened? When had

that happened?

Guilt washed through him as he thought about it. He never once wanted to fall out of face with his father, to lose his father’s respect. Even though Lee had told Dao over and over that that wasn’t true, Dao couldn’t help feeling like a failure.

Moving his body across the room, he straightened it against the hard floor and stared up at the ceiling. The hot spring had done wonders for his body, but he just knew that in the morning he would be in serious pain. He didn’t care. He needed to be next to his father for just a while longer.

Growing up, his father had been his hero. Lee taught Dao everything school didn’t and after he

left for Canada, Dao had somehow forgotten most of the things Lee had taught him. For the second time since his return home, tears flowed down his face. There, in the dim light of the night, Dao sobbed. It was as though he was cleansing his soul.

The tears flowed for his father’s death, his mother’s withering soul and Kianna—the woman who dared to take a chance and love him back. He cried for not trying harder to get his parents out of China and closer to him. He knew that if they had lived, even in Hong Kong, he would have been able to get help sooner.

Regrets.

His body shook slightly until he felt as though he could not cry anymore. Dao was out of tears. Drying his face, Dao rolled to his side and closed his eyes. It took a while before he fell asleep, but when he finally did, it was not peaceful.

The dreams that soared through his night were enough to make him crazy. His father was there, trying to tell him something, but no matter how hard Dao tried, he could not hear clearly what his father was saying. Frustration shot through him and from time to time, he woke up, jerking into sitting position and panting for air. Maybe that was the side effects of sleeping in the same room with a dead man that just ravished one’s mind with nightmares.

Pushing into standing position, he grabbed a light jacket from his bag and exited the small house. He sat on the ground beneath a small tree and stared at the house. Staring, completely and overly confused, as to what his mother saw in the place. True it was peaceful, almost serene, but he wanted her to be safe. His father would have wanted him to take care of her. Dao wanted to take care of her, but she was too proud for that. What would he do? He couldn’t build her a new place in Xingping—there wasn’t any room. He knew that his mother wouldn’t want to move, especially after his father’s death. Her mother before her wouldn’t leave Xingping after her husband’s death.

Rubbing a hand over his face, Dao moaned. He was so tired, but afraid to close his eyes. So much to do and he knew he didn’t have the knowhow or time to do it all in. Getting up, he paced toward the river. He stuck his bare feet into the water and stood there. It was cool against his flesh and sent a beautiful surge of bliss running through him.

“Dao?”

He turned around to face her. From somewhere deep down, he found a smile and it floated across his lips with much effort. “Hey, baby.” He walked toward her and took her hand to help her down toward him. When she was standing in the water, he pulled her into his arms and held on. Once she

was there, he felt alright. Smiling, he kissed her head. “Didn’t I tell you to get some sleep?”

Kianna laughed. “Did you actually think I’d be able to sleep?”

“I should have known.” Dao chuckled. “Come sit with me. There’s something I wanted to talk to you about.”

“Okay,” Kianna whispered.

Leading her back to the rock, he once again took her into his arms and cradled her head against his chest. “My mother,” he began slowly. “I want to take her back with us to Scarborough. She won’t want to of course…”

“Of course.”

“She won’t want to leave Father and she’s in no condition to be here by herself now. I don’t know what to do.”

“Well, you might want to talk to her.” Kianna shrugged against him. “See what she wants. If she doesn’t want to leave, then you’re going to have to accept that she’s an adult.”

“But I don’t like the idea of her being her alone now. When Dad was alive, it was different. He was here to love her and keep her. But now, with the love of her life gone, who knows what is going to happen with her.”

“I know you’re worried, and truthfully so am I. I know what happened once my father lost the woman he loved with all his heart. It’s not pretty

so I’m starting to worry. But you can’t make her do what she doesn’t want to do.”

Her words snapped him from his worry and he shifted so he could see her face. “What do you mean? What happened to your parents?”

“My mother—she died. And then my father, couldn’t seem to live with the thought of not having her so he killed himself.” She shivered.

Dao tightened his arms around her.

“I didn’t mean to spring that on you, especially now but…”

“It’s alright,” he assured her. “I asked. I’m so sorry, baby.”

Guilin was silent. It was as though they sensed the death of a father and wanted to show their respects. As they drove through the streets toward the cemetery, it felt as though they were the only people on the planet. The burial was finally over for Dao’s father, but still an air of nostalgia lay over the small house. Kianna was sitting on Dao’s old bed, changing the film in her camera while Dao’s voice swam through to her.

He was trying to convince his mother to go back with them to Canada. He wasn’t having very much luck. She could hear frustration in his voice and couldn’t say she blamed him. But Mrs. Zhi

loved Lee very much, there was no mistaking that. Now that she loved Dao, Kianna thought about it and couldn’t see herself leaving if she was in Mrs. Zhi’s shoes. It just wouldn’t have happened. She would have stayed right where she was, by his side, in his spirit’s present until it was her time to die.

Then it dawned on her, Jace had been right. The reason her father killed himself was because he couldn’t live without her mother. She felt like a spoiled little brat for only thinking of herself after the deaths. But even though it should be that a child buried his or her parents, Kianna still didn’t think it was right for her father to have done what he had.

When the voices in the next room stopped, Kianna looked up from the camera. How long had they stopped speaking? She hadn’t noticed when the voices had stopped. Snapping the cover in place, she placed the camera on the bed and rushed from the room. She literally skidded to a stop in the room before Dao and his mother. It seemed as though they had been all talked out and were just sitting there. “What’s the verdict?” Kianna got out in Cantonese.

“She’s staying here,” Dao explained in a tired voice.

“Do not talk about me like I am not here. I am sitting right here!” Mrs. Zhi frowned as she smacked him softly against the thigh.

Kianna chuckled and sat down beside Dao. There was a little light back in Mrs. Zhi’s eyes, but Kianna didn’t comment on that. “Well, Dao, you can always come visit,” Kianna pointed out. “You can afford to, right?”