A Marine’s Proposal (10 page)

“Yes.”

Slade noticed the pervasive silence on their way to the restaurant. This was unlike Caitlyn who could chirp for hours on any number of topics that would amuse him. It didn't bode well. He peered over at her and noticed her arms crossed while she bit her lip.

How had this happened with someone he had been so close to that he could spend hours hiking with her where the silences had always been natural, comfortable. Not like this.

“So what did you do today?” he asked.

She shrugged. “Walked around. You know, stuff like that. You?”

“Snorkeled.”

He focused on her hand. Why couldn't he reach over and hold it like they had last night?

Had their sexual act created such a gap between them that it could never be breached? He hoped, desperately hoped, they hadn’t destroyed their friendship.

The awkward silence continued throughout dinner.

“You've barely touched your food, Caitlyn. Are you okay?”

“I'm fine,” she said, moving her food around on her plate.

“No, you're not,” he said. “In the entire time I've known you, I have
never
seen you without a voracious appetite.”

She peered at him and forced a smile, but Slade saw the sadness in her jade eyes.

“Is it because what happened last night?”

She focused on something in the distance and took a deep breath before looking back at him. “Of course it is.”

“I'm sorry. We can forget it ever happened and stick with our original plan.”

“Your plan.” She shook her head. “No, we can't. I shouldn't have agreed to it. It was a stupid idea.”

“Hey, I'm sorry, okay? I thought you agreed it was a good idea.”

Caitlyn pushed her plate away. “I'm going to say something and please don't interrupt me because I don't even know how I'll get it out.”

He nodded. What was coming next?

She stared at the tablecloth halfway between them. Then she grabbed her napkin and sneezed.

“God bless you.”

“Thanks. Excuse me.”

She sneezed again twice.

“God bless you.”

“Oh no!” she said. “Not now.”

“What is it? Are you allergic to something here, you think?”

She shook her said and sneezed twice more. “I don’t know. Maybe.” Her eyes were now watery. “Or it’s nervousness.” She stood up. “I'll be right back.”

His eyes followed her as she hurried to the ladies room. Nervousness? What was that about? Whatever it was, it didn't help settle his uneasiness about what was to come. He spun his glass of Orion beer around, studying the liquid as if it would provide answers.

Caitlyn returned a few minutes later with all signs of watery eyes gone. She smiled and sat back down. “Sorry. I sometimes get a sneezing fit when I get nervous.”

“What? That doesn't even make sense physiologically. Why would that happen?”

“I don't know,” she protested. “It's better than farting uncontrollably!”

Their laughter cut through the thick tension and he hoped it meant the worst was over.

“How have I never seen that before?” Slade asked.

“I don't know. I haven't had cause to be nervous around you before.”

“And here I thought I knew everything about you. Guess there are still things I have yet to discover.”

She chewed on her lip.

“There are plenty of nerve-wracking moments in the Marines. How have you managed to keep a reaction like that under control?”

She groaned. “I haven't yet. There was one time during an inspectionand well, you saw what happened.”

“No way!” he said, laughing, envisioning a dead-silent military inspection with Marines in ranks and then one cute blond causing a ruckus with a sneezing fit. “You'd be great to have on hand during a battle.”

“Shut up,” she said, swatting me playfully on the arm. “It wouldn't happen then. Not with adrenaline kicking in like that.” Although she was still laughing, she said, “Stop laughing. I have something important to tell you.”

“Okay, okay.” He wiped tears of laughter out of his eyes. “Go ahead.”

The smile left her face as her features froze, her jade eyes now filled with determination. The beautiful sensuous woman he spent the night with hardened into a warrior with steely resolve.

She took a deep breath and began. “I shouldn't have agreed to this marriage idea because I haven't been straight with you. I've grown feelings for you, more than just our friendship. I don't know what I was thinking. Maybe some stupid schoolgirl fantasy of it being real—I don't know—it’s so stupid. But I've wanted what happened last night to happen for so long. And I should have been honest with you from the beginning. But I didn’t. I didn’t really know how I felt about you. And I was so excited and confused and…and…I know you think it was a mistake. And now I know that I can't bear pretending that we're all happy and in love and living together when it's just one big farce. So I can't go along with it on Monday.”

If she was worried about him interrupting, she needn't have. His mouth dangled half open, not believing what he was hearing.

“When we go back to work on Monday, we have to figure out a legal way to get out of this. Maybe it can be annulled. Maybe we have to go to the CO and describe it as a stupid mistake we let get out of hand. Hopefully, nobody will find out about this and we can try to forget it ever happened. And then we can have to try to get out of the lease for the apartment.

She took another deep breath and focused on his face. Her green eyes were filled with both sadness and a steely resolve, reminding him how she could be so vulnerable and yet so determined. Slade yearned to reach out and touch her, do something to alleviate the pain in her eyes. Anything. His brain still hadn't even processed what the hell was going on so he didn’t even know how he should respond. How the hell were they laughing one minute ago when the discussion had suddenly turned so serious? Worst of all, he was losing her. The pain was greater than he thought possible.

“I'm sorry I let this get out of hand,” she continued. “I think we need to spend some time apart. Because I have to find a way to move on with my life and get over you. And the more time I spend with you, the more difficult it will be for that to happen.”

She pushed her chair back and stood up.

“I'm sorry I messed up your plans. It's all my fault. My bags are out of the room so it's all yours. I'm going back to the hotel to get them and leave. Bye, Slade.”

His eyes followed her as she exited the restaurant and he noticed a few businessmen turn to watch her. Jealousy was the least of his concerns at the moment. The woman he cared about, more than any other, just walked out of his life. Forever.

Fuck!

He took a sip of his beer again, studying the liquid again while he tried to process what the hell was going on.

Caitlyn cut him out of her life. She rejected all his stupid ideas of getting married and getting an apartment. All the damage they'd caused last week they'd have to rectify somehow.

But most of all—she admitted she had feelings for him. That she had fantasized about being with him. Had she wanted him this whole time as he had wanted her? Did she say she was hoping their marriage sham was real? Did she love him?

What did it matter now—she had left him. For good. While he sat there like an idiot drinking a stupid beer. He threw more than enough yen on the table and then he ran out to find her.

Where did she go? Scanning the area around the restaurant, he searched for the light-haired American woman in a blue and yellow dress.

He couldn't find her. so he took off in the direction that led to the hotel.

****

Caitlyn didn't know how she got through that speech, revealing her feelings for him and then saying they needed distance. She hurried down to Kokusai-dori, heading back toward the hotel, resigned that their relationship was irrevocably damaged. The part that hurt the most was how she had to lose him as a friend. He was the closest one she'd had in so long. Having him so near for all these months, but unable to touch had been difficult enough. Losing him as a friend would cut even more deeply, but it had to be done. She couldn't go on with the charade any longer.

“Caitlyn. Caitlyn!”

When she heard her name, she froze mid-step, to the annoyance of the pedestrians behind her.

“Wait!”

She turned around to see Slade bounding up to her in massive strides, the muscles visibly extended in his powerful legs. He towered head and shoulders above most of the people around him, with broad shoulders outlined by his dark green button-up shirt.

“What do you want, Slade?”

“Come. Come with me, please?” He took her hand and led her away from the main road where fewer people clogged the sidewalks.

Caitlyn rubbed a callous on his hand absently while her mind swam with reasons why he returned.

He faced her and swept a loose tendril of her hair off her cheek.

“I haven't been honest with you either,” he said.

“Oh. How so?”

His feet had been planted in a firm stance, but then he shifted from one foot to the other.

“I have feelings for you, too. Always have. I didn't want to be another one of those guys hitting on you. To tell you the truth, they aren't just feelings. It's an all-encompassing part of me, what I feel. You. You're a part of me. I'm in love with you, Caitlyn. And maybe my stupid ruse was a way I justified of getting as close to you as I could. And to hold on to you, be with you for as long as I can in this crazy military world where people are deployed from one location to the next.”

Caitlyn had stopped breathing. Her hands trembled while excitement shot through her core. Did Slade Masters tell her he loved her?

“I want to be with you. And not only while we're deployed here in Okinawa. But always,” he continued. “Wherever they send us in the world.”

“I—oh my God—I can't believe this is happening,” Caitlyn said. “Oh God, I can't think.” She put her shaking hand on her chest.

“Oh no. You're not about to have another sneezing fit, are you?”

“No!” She cried. “I love you, too, Slade. You big control freak.” She laughed. “With all my being.”

When Slade bent down on one knee, Caitlyn threw her hand over her mouth. People walking by had stopped to stare. They were in the middle of Naha, one of the busiest cities she'd ever been in during her life. Despite all the flashing lights vying for attention around them, she was well aware that most of the eyes were on them, the crazy American who just dropped to his knee in the middle of the sidewalk in front of a woman. She caught the eye of a little girl, around eight or nine, with her mother, and they both grinned widely.

A young girl’s dream,
Caitlyn thought.

He took her hand. “Caitlyn O'Neill Masters, will you marry me—again? For real. Not some sham. For love, not convenience. And not for some duration of time. Forever.”

Tears welled up in her eyes and she tried to hold them back. So many emotions rushed through her at once that she tried to rein them in before giving up. A smile spread across her face, tears fell down her cheeks, and she laughed as she cried in happiness.

Slade brushed a tear off her skin and brought his finger to his lips.

“Shit, I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

Caitlyn waved dismissively. “Happy tears, Slade. Not sad.”

“I want to do this right,” he said, looking around the Okinawan shops. “I need to get you another ring.”

“Oh, don’t be silly,” Caitlyn said. “Your grandmother’s ring means so much to you—so much to me.” She removed it from her finger and handed it to him and he slipped it back on her finger.

“Will you marry me, Caitlyn?”

Her buoyant mood then burst through her face in a grin a mile wide. “Yes, Slade, of course, I’ll marry you.”

Slade let out a big yee haw and picked Caitlyn up, spinning her around the sidewalk.

“We're getting married!” he announced to the passersby.

Enough Okinawans knew English that they understood. They cheered and clapped. A few said, “Congratulations.”