A Merry Little Christmas (12 page)

Lisette shook her head earnestly. “No, she really
was
a beauty queen. Miss Tracy Lovejoy.” She sniffed. “She was a runner-up in the Miss America contest. Or Miss Universe or Miss World or Miss Stuck
-
Up Hateful Cow, I don’t remember which one. But she did everything but
wear
a tiara and a cape into the salon, believe me. She wanted everyone to know that she was the queen of the universe and the rest of us were her slaves.
 

“
She
tried to be sweet when she was with Warren, of course, but when he wasn’t around
,
mon
dieu,
what a horror.” Lisette shuddered. “You probably don’t know this, but Warren is quite wealthy. His family has boatloads of money and he has money of his own from his income and investments. How do I know this? Oh, little miss runner-up, of course. She and her coven of friends and her greedy sisters, they made sure that everyone with whom they came in contact knew that Warren Alexander was filthy rich, and believe me, they were determined to spend every penny. And those friends of hers, they were horrible.” She gave another exaggerated shudder. “They traveled together like a pack of lady dogs, if you know what I mean.”

Lisette stopped and drank deeply from the glass of iced tea, then held out the glass for more. “All she wanted was money, money, money. He bought her a ring that made the Hope Diamond look like a pinkie ring,” she said indignantly. She was so fired up by now, the word
“
hope ’’
sounded like
“
ope
."

“So what did you do, exactly? I mean, you knew she was just out to get her mitts on Warren’s money and I can see how angry that made you, but what did you do?” Paris scooted closer to the sofa in her eagerness to hear more.

Lisette gave a short laugh. “You can tell I’m angry because I start to sound like
Pep
e
Le Pew, I know. It is a family curse. We all sound like cartoons when we get wound up,” she said on a hiccup. “Well, this is what really made me furious. She always acted like I wasn’t there, you know? She talked over my head or behind my back, but she never gave me any respect as a trained professional. I got used to that in a way, but I was always amazed at what she would say; it was like she didn’t care who heard her, she was so sure of Warren that she could just... ooh!” The fire returned to Lisette’s voice and her eyes snapped with
fury
.

“When I was showing her these exquisite dining room chairs, she started laughing like a hyena and said Warren was so fat, he would break the chairs.” Lisette’s face got red with indignation as she recalled the scene. “
A big, handsome,
kind
man like
Warren and she called him fat. Fat! Warren is a prince, a
king,
he is a beautiful, big man, and this wench, this hoochie calls him fat! And her little coven, all the ugly witches were laughing with her.
Merde!
I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted him to know what he was in for with that witch and I fixed it so that he would find out.

“How did I do it? I told her there was a very special bedroom at DuMouchelle Gallery, the most expensive set ever made. Of course she said she must have it, so I arranged to personally pick up her and her fellow witches and take her there to see it. I didn’t want her car to be anywhere
near
the premises, you see. Then I called Warren and told him I had found an exquisite set of bedroom furniture I knew his darling
fiancée
would love, and wouldn’t he like to surprise her with it, and of course he agreed and I set a time for him to meet me at DuMouchelle.”

Paris and Angelique looked at each other and then at Lisette, who was sitting back on the sofa with a satisfied look on her face. “Oh, yes, you guessed it. I took those women to look at the bedroom set, which was magnificent, by the way, and I got them talking about it because I knew that the matter of his weight would come up. I left them there and went to meet him at the door and took him back to where all the vicious talk was going on, and sure enough, all you could hear was the
fiancée
going on about how much it cost and how much money he had and how he’d
better
buy it for her because that’s all the fat boy was good for.” Lisette’s face fell and she dropped her head into her hands. “She said the only reason she ever gave him the time of day was because he was so rich she’d never have to work again and that’s all she wanted from him. She said she had plenty of men on the side to take care of her sex needs. She really said that!

“Oh, it was horrible, it was worse than horrible. The look on Warren’s face ... I’ll never forget it, never. It was terribly painful to see him so hurt. But I couldn’t let him marry that woman; she would have destroyed him.
She would have eaten him alive;
I know it in my heart. But not a day has gone by that I don’t feel terribly ashamed for what I did,” she said sadly.

There was an awkward moment of silence that ended when Angelique spoke up. “Well, you need to get over it, toots. I’d have done something much worse if I saw someone I cared for about to walk into a scorpion’s nest. He should be down on his knees kissing your feet to thank you for getting him out of that mess,” she said succinctly.

Paris had to agree. “I know you feel terrible about witnessing his pain, but what else could you have done, Lisette? Knowing what you knew, how could you have let him marry that woman?”

Lisette availed herself of the tissues Angelique had thoughtfully provided. “I could have written him an anonymous note, or told his parents or something.” She sniffed. “His parents are wonderful, I met them a couple of times and they are so sweet, just lovely.” She noisily blew her nose.

Angelique groaned. “Girl, have you learned nothing from these movies?” she asked indignantly, pointing to the pile of DVDs on the coffee table. “Men don’t listen when they’re in love, or
think
they’re in love. You can’t tell them anything. He wouldn’t have paid any attention to a note, especially one with no name on it. And if he’s really far gone in the infatuation department, he’s for sure not going to listen to Mama and Daddy. He would’ve eloped with her before he broke up with her.”

Angelique leaned over and grabbed the hand that hadn’t been involved in the nose-blowing and squeezed it. “You did the best you could. And it worked. He might have had some moments of heartache, but it’s better than having years and years of real pain from being married to someone who doesn’t love you and only wants to take advantage of you. You did the right thing, Lisette. Now, go wash your face and let’s figure out how we’re gonna rope this big bronco for you,” she said.

Despite her tears, Lisette had to laugh.

***

The basement of Donnie’s house had been cleverly converted into a game room, complete with pool table, arcade games, a wet bar and a huge plasma TV mounted on the wall. Warren carefully chalked his cue as he surveyed the pool table. Donnie was dividing his time between watching the basketball game on TV and watching what Warren was doing at the pool table. He wasn’t particularly worried about Warren beating him; his friend could have had a fine career as a pool hustler if medicine hadn’t appealed to him more. He knew Warren would beat him, the way he almost always did.
 
There was something on Donnie’s mind however, but he didn’t want to bring it up. Luckily, Warren brought it up for him.

“So, Cochran, what do you think about Lisette?” he asked in an overly casual tone.

Donnie turned his fall attention to the pool table then, preparing to take his shot. He wasn’t surprised by the question at all, since the two men had seen Lisette and Angelique a few times since the art auction. Apparently, Lisette had made quite an impression on the doctor.
 
After making several successful shots in a row, Donnie finally gave Warren an answer. “What do I think about her? She seems to be talented, successful, smart and personable. And she’s very, very pretty. She may be half French, but the booty came directly from the homeland,” he said with admiration.

“Watch your mouth, man.” The words were spoken without heat, but Donnie knew Warren was quite serious.

“So I take it you’re a little interested in Miss Lisette Francois,” Donnie said. “And you know I meant no disrespect to her, it was just an observation. For a little bitty woman, she’s put together quite nicely. Dang, that makes me sound like a hound, doesn’t it?”

“That’s because you are a hound, Cochran,” Warren said with a wink. “Anyway, I told you she was the designer we hired to put the house together, right? And I’m sure I also told you that she was kind of instrumental in me finding out what my ex-
fianc
é
e
was all about.” The game forgotten, Warren went over to the bar and sat on a tall stool while helping himself to a Corona. “Tracy was a first-class actress, I’ll give her that. And it’s not because she looks so cute in that Farmer Jack commercial,” he said with a wicked smile.

Tracy’s dreams of stardom had evaporated after their aborted engagement when it became apparent to those that mattered that her talents were fairly limited outside of some spectacular measurements. She now did local commercials once in a while, like the one for the Farmer Jack grocery chain, to supplement her income from selling furniture on commission at Art Van.

“She always acted like
th
e sweetest thing in the world, so feminine and adorable. If I hadn’t walked up on her and her girls in that gallery dogging me like I was the biggest geek in the world, I would’ve actually tied the knot with that heifer.
 
Lisette saved my life, man.” He took a deep draught from the bottle and stared at it reflectively. “I always had the feeling that she did it on purpose, you know?
Like she set the whole thing up to head me off at the pass.
I always wanted to thank her for that, but I didn’t know how.”

Donnie made a few more passes with his cue stick and replaced it in the rack. Joining his friend at the bar, he also took a beer. “So why don’t you tell her now? It’s never too late,” he said.

Warren shook his head and went around the bar to get a glass of ice water from the small refrigerator.
“No way.
If you could’ve heard the things Tracy was saying about me, calling me a fat chump, saying I’d break the bed down with my big butt, just generally clowning me...” h
is voice stopped and his expression turned glum
.
“It’s not the kind of thing you want to think about, especially when someone as beautiful as Lisette heard the whole thing. I need a woman who’s going to love me and respect me for
me,
not someone who feels sorry for me. And that’s what was happening there, Cochran. She obviously felt pity for me and she didn’t want to see my dumb butt get cleaned out by a gold digger. So, she intervened.”

After draining the glass of water, he put it in the small sink behind the bar. “I still want to thank her in some way,” he said thoughtfully. “And I must agree with you, Cochran, she sure is fine. And she’s as sweet as can be, too. We’re going to the Auto Show next week, you should come.”

Donnie looked puzzled. “You’re going on a date? You were just acting like you didn’t want to ask her out,” he said.

“No, I meant we’re all going, me and my harem, Paris, Angelique, Lisette and who knows who else. My sister might come, too. Angelique called me and asked if I would come with and I
said sure. They’re all cute and they’re all fun. You need to come, too, so I won’t look like Dr.
Pimpenstein
with all those pretty women.” He gave a deep belly laugh and pointed his index finger at Donnie. “It’ll also give you an opportunity to keep an eye on Angel since that’s all you want to do. ’Cause if you think I’m scared of Lisette, it’s nothing compared to you. That little woman has you turned out and you just won’t admit it,” Warren gloated.

Donnie gave Warren a look of disgust “Throw me another lime, they’re in the refrigerator. And give me another Corona. If you’re gonna start with the snaps, I need to be well lubricated” he growled.

But what he was really wondering was when Warren had crossed over into the place where he could call Angelique by the pet name only family and very close friends called her. What was that hot nasty feeling? Surely it wasn’t jealousy, not over Evilene. A sudden spasm in his stomach made him change his mind.
“Never mind the Corona, doc.
Is there a Ve
rn
or’s in there?”

Warren
gave him another evil grin. Vern
or’s ginger ale was the Michigan remedy for all ills from upset stomach to flu to headaches, but as far as he knew, it wouldn’t cure budding passion. He kept this to himself and merely passed the green and gold can across the counter. “Drink up, Cochran,” was all he said.

***

“So it’s settled. We’ll have a big Super Bowl party here and invite Warren and make sure you guys get some quality time,” Paris said happily. She was in her element when she was mating up likely couples.

Angelique was curled up on the end of the sofa and her face was bright with excitement. “This’ll be perfect. We’ll make a lot of food and invite some fun people, and before everyone gets here, we’ll make sure you have a moment or two alone with Warren,” she said. “Make sure you wear something kinda sexy—oh, never mind you could come in a sack and you’d still look good.” She laughed.