A Mother's Spirit (25 page)

‘Dreadful, isn’t it?’ Joe said.

Gloria nodded dumbly.

‘Obviously he can’t think of coming home just yet.’

‘No,’ said Gloria faintly. She could understand that Tom couldn’t leave until she was better, but how long would that be? And what then? Would he just say goodbye and come home? She shook her head and fought down her panic because she felt as if strands were winding around her, holding her down to the farm for ever.

‘Gloria, is anything the matter?’ Helen asked her friend the following Saturday, as they walked the main street of Buncrana. ‘You seem burdened down with sadness.’

Gloria hesitated. Joe had said that the news in Tom’s letter was family business and that was how it must stay, but surely that didn’t extend to the McEvoys. Jack and Nellie were good friends of Tom, and they knew all about Molly. Tom had even taken them the cuttings from the papers and they had been as horrified as he was. So she said, ‘We got a letter from Tom the day before yesterday.’

‘Did it say why he was delayed?’

‘Oh, yes,’ Gloria said miserably. ‘He explained it all very well and I will tell you because if I don’t tell someone I will go mad. First, though, I must have your solemn promise that you will not breathe a word of it to another soul, apart from your parents and possibly Cathy.’

‘You have that, of course,’ Helen said. ‘The McEvoys are very good at keeping secrets, but it does sound terribly mysterious.’

‘Believe me, the things Tom told us of were not mysterious, they were disgusting and depraved,’ Gloria said. ‘The very night that Tom was booked to come home he found Aggie.’

‘Aggie?’ Helen said. ‘Was she was the sister that Mammy said was supposed to have run off with the gypsies, though she never believed it?’

‘She ran off with no gypsies,’ Gloria said. ‘Though, God knows, she might have fared better if she had. It wasn’t Tom that found Aggie, to be absolutely accurate, it was Aggie found Tom.’

She went on to tell Helen what had really happened to the girl. ‘Can you imagine her despair, Helen, when she found the woman who was to help her gone?’

‘Oh God! That poor girl …’

‘And without the prostitutes befriending her she would have died.’

‘I know,’ Helen said. ‘You don’t think about that side of prostitutes, do you? They must have the same feelings as everyone else.’

‘Well, to be honest, I have never spent much time thinking of them at all,’ Gloria said. ‘Yet I suppose in a way she had fallen in with possibly the only ones in that city who wouldn’t judge her, and who cared for her when she lost the baby.’

‘And in doing so they sealed her fate,’ Helen pointed out.

‘Yes, they did that all right,’ Gloria conceded. ‘I imagine few girls sucked into such a life would have a brother like
Tom who, once he found out what his sister was doing, was willing and able to help her.’

‘But how did Tom recognise her?’ Helen asked. ‘There is a blackout in England.’

‘Someone was waving a torch about,’ Gloria told Helen. ‘It lit up Tom’s face for an instant and Aggie knew who he was.’

‘I have never heard anything so tragically sad,’ Helen said. ‘I have tasted unhappiness and loss and so have you, but my heart bleeds for that poor woman and what she has gone through all her life.’

‘Yes, and it all traces back to that bloody dancing teacher McAllister,’ Gloria said.

‘Quite,’ Helen said with feeling. ‘Mammy said he died shortly after. Good riddance, I say. God Almighty! The damage he did to poor Aggie.’

‘McAllister’s wife told Tom that Aggie wasn’t the first and probably wouldn’t have been the last either. Think of how many young lives he might have ruined.’

‘Aye,’ Helen said with a sigh, then added in a quiet voice, ‘The wife didn’t … well, you know, do him in, like?’

It was on the tip of Gloria’s tongue to tell Helen the truth, but she stopped herself. That secret really had to be kept within the family. Even years on, there could be dire consequences for McAllister’s wife and Tom. So she said, ‘I have no idea how McAllister died, and after all this time it hardly matters.’

‘No, it doesn’t, of course, and at least Aggie is out of it now, though she has lost so many years.’

‘Yet Tom says she bears no resentment to anyone,’ Gloria went on, as they walked a little faster. ‘She’s just as he remembered her from a boy and Tom is staying with Aggie for as long as it takes. I hope they’re back soon. I am not completely heartless but, God, I am bored out of my brain.’

‘And me,’ Helen admitted, looking up and down the narrow main street. ‘People seem to stagnate here. Some people like that, of course.’

‘I am not one of them,’ Gloria said. ‘I used to have a job when we were in London. I miss the company, and the money too would be useful. The trouble with children is that they grow and nothing Ben wore last spring and summer will look at him now. And he says his shoes are pinching his toes.’

‘Well,’ Helen said, ‘you and I must put on our thinking caps and find something the two of us can do.’

The weeks passed, Easter was over, and they were nearly at the end of April. Joe was still fretting about Finch and how he couldn’t be allowed to get away with what he had done to his sister.

‘Don’t keep on about it,’ Gloria snapped one day. ‘It doesn’t do Ben any good to hear it, for one thing, and as you don’t even know where the man lives, you can’t do anything even if you wanted to.’

‘I do now,’ Joe said triumphantly, shaking out the letter he had got from his brother just that morning. ‘Paul Simmons, that man that Molly’s father worked for, found out. He even knows where he hangs out in the evening.’

‘So is he to be involved in this too?’

‘No,’ Joe said firmly. ‘I told you before, this is family business.’ Then he smiled and went on, ‘Anyway, according to Tom, the only one of the family that Paul Simmons wants to get involved with is Aggie.’

‘What do you mean, get involved with Aggie? How?’

‘You know,’ Joe said. ‘The normal way. They’re fond of one another.’

Gloria hadn’t met Aggie, but she had read the letter Tom sent them describing the condition of Aggie when he had first seen her. He said she was just skin and bone, her fine hair steel grey and hung round her face in greasy trails, and she was dressed like some old trampish woman. The image he depicted had stayed in Gloria’s mind and she was stunned that a woman like that, and one who had been on the streets, could be found attractive by any man.

‘Does he know everything?’ she asked.

‘Of course he does,’ Joe answered. ‘It wasn’t her fault, Gloria.’

‘I know that,’ Gloria said. ‘It’s just that some men aren’t that concerned with whose fault such things are.’

‘He has offered Tom a job in his factory as well,’ Joe said. ‘Tom was getting very strapped for cash, and he wants to stay in Birmingham until Molly’s wedding, at least.’

‘And then what?’

‘Then he said we will look at the whole thing again.’

Gloria sighed for she had guessed as much. ‘And what d’you intend to do about this man Finch, Joe?’

‘What do you think?’ Joe growled out. ‘He has to pay for what he did to Aggie, and this time it’s down to me!’

‘How d’you work that out?’

‘Tom dealt with McAllister, the first man who abused Aggie,’ Joe said. ‘And, poor fellow, it coloured his life ever after. Finch is mine. Thank God I have got my strength back.’

‘Joe, surely this isn’t the way,’ Gloria reasoned. ‘It’s monstrous that you should undertake some sort of vendetta like this. You are not in the Wild West of America now. Let the authorities deal with it.’

‘They wouldn’t believe Aggie,’ Joe said. ‘Why would they? They would see her as a street woman, while Finch is probably a pillar of the community. He’s certainly rich, and we know how many doors money opens, and he’s influential. He’s what many would see as a fine upstanding man and they would take his word every time against a depraved street woman.’

‘But, Joe,’ Gloria insisted, ‘you can’t do this kind of thing. Meting out justice yourself is against the law. You could get into big trouble or get hurt, or both, and in the end it might make things worse not better.’

‘I’ll have to take that chance,’ Joe said. ‘Tom will be with me, but I want him to take no hand in it. I want to beat that man to pulp myself.’

‘Ooh, don’t,’ Gloria said. ‘Violence isn’t the way, surely.’

‘It is the only way with scum like that,’ Joe ground out. ‘The only language a man like him understands. I can’t believe you, Gloria. You read what he did to my sister. What did you think I was going to do to him, shake him by the hand?’

Gloria shook her head. She had hoped that he never found out where the man was, and felt annoyed at Paul Simmons for passing the Sullivan brothers information, for he must know they would act on it. But then if Joe was right, and he was keen on Aggie, maybe he too thought the man should get his just deserts.

‘Joe,’ she said, holding on to his arms and staring into his eyes, ‘listen to me. I don’t want you to do this. It’s wrong and it’s dangerous, and if you have any feeling for me at all, then give it up.’

Joe shook his head. ‘Sorry, my mind is made up. This is for Aggie.’

‘You are putting the wishes of a sister you haven’t seen for over forty years above the welfare of your wife and child. Do we count for nothing?’

‘I am surprised that you even have to ask that question,’ Joe said. ‘You mean the world to me. You should know that.’

‘Then give up this mad notion,’ Gloria cried.

‘No,’ Joe said gravely. ‘I am afraid I can’t do that. This isn’t something Aggie has asked me to do or expects me to do. She will know nothing about it until the deed is done.’

Gloria remembered back to the time that Joe decided to volunteer as an auxiliary fireman, when she acknowledged that once he had made up his mind, wild horses would never make him change it. She had tried and failed to prevent him doing something then that had nearly taken his life. Then he had seemed to have no thought in his head for her or Ben, and this was the same. Joe could see nothing except that he had to avenge the violation of his sister. He didn’t seem to care that it was against the law.

‘Joe, listen to me, please!’ she begged. ‘You could end up in prison for this.’

Joe shrugged. ‘So be it.’

‘I see. So where does that leave me and Ben?’

‘I have to do this, Gloria.’

‘I say again, Joe, where does that leave Ben and me?’ Gloria almost hissed. ‘Don’t you have a duty to us first?’

Joe stared at his wife. She had no siblings so how could she possibly understand the bond that held them together and the guilt he felt that Tom had borne the brunt of all of Aggie’s problems so far? He had been no help to either of them, and that thought was eating away at him. It seemed to supersede everything else. ‘I would feel less of a man if I was to let this go now, or let Tom deal with it like he did last time,’ he said at last.

‘I’ll tell Ben that then, shall I?’ Gloria said. ‘Like I will tell him the same if you end up in a hospital bed, or even on a mortuary slab, as you could do. It can’t have escaped your notice that this man Finch is dangerous. He has already killed the man that Aggie was to marry. What will he do to you?’

‘I think that I am well able for Finch.’

‘Are there no words I can say that can turn you away from this mad notion?’ Gloria asked.

‘None,’ said Joe. ‘The decision is made. The die is now cast.’

Gloria knew it was, which made her feel helpless and frustrated. That night she cried herself to sleep, the first time she had done that since she had landed in Ireland.

A few days after this, with Joe and Gloria barely speaking, Joe told Gloria that he had arranged for Jack McEvoy to take over the milking that weekend, as he intended to go to England.

‘Didn’t he find that strange?’

‘No, I told him that as I was not going to be able to get
to Molly’s wedding, because we had already decided that you and Ben will go in my stead, I wanted to meet Molly, who Tom keeps on about, and check out the chap she is marrying. He didn’t think that strange at all.’

‘Yeah,’ Gloria snapped. ‘Well, I think that he would take a different viewpoint altogether if he knew what you would really be at.’

‘Well, he’ll never know that, will he?’ Joe said warningly.

‘Don’t look at me like that, Joe,’ Gloria snapped. ‘Though I abhor what you intend to do I will tell no tales. Quite apart from anything else, I would be almost ashamed to.’

‘When I told you about Tom, you said you could understand that he wanted to make McAllister pay for what he had done,’ Joe said.

‘I know, but Tom didn’t intend to kill the man,’ Gloria said. ‘Though I know that it’s a good job that he did.’

‘Tom was just a boy of thirteen,’ Joe told her. ‘That was why he couldn’t meet McAllister on equal terms. Between me and Finch it will be different.’

The day before Joe was due to leave, Gloria called at the post office and asked Helen to go for a walk, giving the excuse that it was too nice an afternoon to miss. It had been a lovely day, but the truth was she was too churned up about Joe, and relations between the two of them were so strained she couldn’t have stayed in the cottage a moment longer.

Helen knew that there was something ailing her friend, and though she had no idea of Joe’s intention, she did think Gloria’s strange mood might have something to do with the fact that Joe was going to Birmingham. She thought Gloria might unburden herself once they were away from other people and so she suggested they walk by the River Crana, which flowed on the edge of the town.

‘Good idea,’ Nellie said, overhearing this plan. ‘Do you both good to get a bit of fresh air, especially you, Gloria, for you are as white as a sheet.’

The two set off down the hill, the sun warm on their backs, the promise of hotter days to come. Even to Gloria’s jaundiced eyes the countryside had never looked lovelier. The trees were heavy with fragrant blossom, and the hedgerows alive with colour. When they reached the shore they wandered down to the harbour, empty of fishermen today, and the water was sparkling in the sunshine.

It all seemed peaceful and tranquil, and it seemed almost
inconceivable to Gloria that in the morning Joe would be going off to Birmingham for the express purpose of beating someone to pulp. She felt sick with fear for him, and also slight disgust at what he intended.

‘What is it?’ Helen said. ‘I know something is bothering you.’

Gloria turned to face Helen, seeing the concern on her face. She wanted to tell Helen everything – not just what Joe was about, but also how it had changed something in the way she felt about him. She fought with her conscience, but before she was able to say anything, she saw Helen’s face light up and she said, ‘Hello. What brings you this way?’

Gloria spun round and saw Morrisey and Meadows coming towards them and knew the moment to tell Helen was gone.

‘We were looking for you,’ Meadows said. ‘Your mother said we would find you here. We have a proposition to put to you.’

‘Oh, yes?’ Helen said, smiling at Meadows archly, her eyebrows raised in enquiry. ‘And what sort of proposition would that be?’

‘Well, we were wondering if either or both of you want a job?’

‘I do,’ Helen said, turning for home. ‘I would be a lot happier, because I feel bad living off my parents. But what sort of work are we talking of, and where?’

‘Springtown Camp has vacancies in the canteen at the moment,’ Meadows said.

‘Are you mad?’ Helen said. ‘We would get ourselves talked about.’

‘And I am married,’ Gloria stared flatly.

‘That doesn’t preclude you,’ Morrisey said. ‘You wouldn’t be the only one there. In fact, they like married women.’

‘Yes, but Joe would never stand for it, would he, Gloria?’ Helen asked.

Suddenly Gloria remembered Joe’s set face when he told her what he was going to Birmingham for, and that none of her pleading had moved him one jot. He hadn’t asked her opinion – far from it – so why should she value his or his permission either?

‘I had a job in London, she said defensively.

‘Not in a camp full of sailors you didn’t,’ Helen said. ‘Anyway, just because there are vacancies there is no guarantee that we will be offered a job. They’ll likely have hundreds after them.’

‘Not that many,’ Morrisey said. Then he turned to Gloria and said, ‘That time you went for a look around you were talking to a woman in the canteen, remember?’

‘Yes, Joan I think her name was.’

‘That’s right,’ Morrisey said. ‘Joan Reilly. She is the manageress and she remembered you.’

‘After all this time?’ Gloria said incredulously. ‘I only saw her for a few minutes and that was months ago.’

‘They’ve been run off their feet at times in the canteen, because in January a construction battalion arrived at the base but they weren’t given any extra staff to cope with the inflated numbers. Then last week two girls announced they were leaving and Joan remembered you two,’ Morrisey explained. ‘She said you were just the right sort of age and she thought you both very suitable, especially you, Gloria, because she said you could speak the lingo.’

‘I would like to have a go,’ Helen said. ‘I think I might enjoy it, but I wouldn’t go without you, Gloria.’

‘Well, I’d like to try for a job too,’ Gloria said. ‘The money would be very useful and as a few people travel to Derry to work just now they have the trains organised to cope with it.’

‘Anyway, if you are interested she would like to see you Saturday afternoon.’

Gloria remembered that Joe would be in England then,
and she pushed down the thought that he might be dead, dying or arrested and said, ‘I think I could make that.’

‘Well, we can certainly go up and see the woman on Saturday,’ Helen said. ‘No harm done if we decide to go no further with it. D’you really think Joe will let you do this?’

Gloria shrugged. ‘To be honest,’ she said, ‘I really don’t know what Joe thinks of anything any more. But I shall put it to him at the first opportunity, and stress how important it is for me to have this chance.’

‘You might have an easier job with Joe than I will have talking Mammy round,’ Helen said. ‘She is bound to disapprove.’

However, Nellie had seen the restlessness in Helen and knew that she was too active a girl to be idle. If she didn’t find employment soon, she might return to Birmingham, and Nellie didn’t want her going back to a city full of dark memories. Maybe to take a job only six miles from her home would be a solution of sorts, and if Gloria was to go too then they could look after each other.

That night, as soon as the chores were done and Ben in bed, Gloria told Joe about meeting the petty officers and the proposal they had put to them both. However, she didn’t mention going up to see the place on Saturday afternoon, though the words were hardly out of her mouth anyway when Joe nearly bit her head off.

He was incensed. ‘What d’you mean they offered the pair of you a job at the Springtown Camp in Derry?’ he cried.

‘Ssh,’ Gloria cautioned. ‘You’ll disturb Ben. He’ll probably not be asleep just yet.’

‘Never mind that,’ Joe said irritably ‘What’s this all about?’

‘You know what it’s about,’ Gloria said. ‘I told you plainly. That’s just how it happened.’

‘Well, I hope you told them straight that it is out of the question.’

‘No,’ Gloria said quietly, ‘I didn’t, and don’t shout at me.’

‘Good God, woman, you damned well need shouting at,’ Joe exploded. ‘You can put that hare-brained notion right out of your head.’

‘I think not,’ Gloria said. ‘I don’t need your permission.’

‘This is monstrous, Gloria,’ Joe thundered. ‘Jesus, I am a mild-mannered man, God knows, but you are enough to try the patience of a saint. You will take no job in any camp, American or otherwise. You will not shame me like this.’

‘Oh, yes?’ Gloria retorted. ‘What about you shaming me? How d’you think I will feel if, because of this stupid scheme you and your brother have cooked up, you end up dead or in gaol?’

‘Is that what this is all about?’ Joe cried. ‘Tit for tat?’

‘No, it isn’t,’ Gloria almost hissed. ‘But how many times have you made up your mind about something without discussing it with me and not given a cent for how I might feel about it?’

‘This isn’t about me,’ Joe snapped, feeling they had gone off the subject. ‘It’s about you and this totally unsuitable job.’

‘I don’t happen to think it is all that unsuitable.’

‘I can’t believe that I am hearing this,’ Joe said. ‘You are not taking it and that’s that. You must obey me in this.’

‘Oh, yes?’ Gloria said sarcastically. ‘Why is that, exactly?’

‘Gloria, I am your husband.’

‘Yeah, that’s right,’ Gloria snapped back. ‘That doesn’t make you my bloody keeper.’

Joe regarded his wife and saw just how furious she was. Her eyes were flashing fire and so although he was angry and outraged himself, he knew their yelling at each other would achieve nothing. So he said in a conciliatory manner, ‘You must see, Gloria, that this will not do at all. Anyway, aren’t there girls the length and breadth of Derry to work in the place?’

‘There are no girls queuing up to work at the camp,’ Gloria said. ‘The woman I spoke to in the canteen the time we were taken to look around it said a lot of parents wouldn’t let their daughters work there, and prefer them to go into the shirt factories. And the commander at the camp prefers older, more settled women rather than flighty girls with all those young men. I wouldn’t be the only married woman there, and Helen is mad keen but wants me to go with her.’

‘Helen is single.’

‘Yes, she is,’ Gloria agreed. ‘She’s a respectable widow and not seeking a husband amongst young Yankee sailor boys.’

‘Why the hell did they think of you and Helen anyway?’

‘The time we went to see around the camp we were taken into the canteen. The manageress asked us if we were looking for a job. She said we were just the type of woman they would go for at the camp, especially me because I am American. Now they have two girls leaving and the manageress remembered us. The two petty officers came to tell us that because they know where Helen lives. They just told us about the vacancies and asked us if we are interested. I imagine it will be up to the manageress, or the camp commander, or both, whether we would be offered a job or not.’

‘But you would like to work there, wouldn’t you?’ Joe said. ‘I can see it in your eyes.’

Gloria nodded. ‘Yes, Joe. And I will tell you one of the reasons why. If we ever move from here, we will have to start again and we can’t do that without money. I can just about manage on what you give me each week. There is nothing to save at all.’

Joe knew that.

‘I mean, Ben is always needing new clothes and shoes,’ Gloria went on. ‘The boy is growing and I will not send him to school like some sort of ragamuffin.’

‘I’m not suggesting that you do,’ Joe said stiffly.

‘Well, where is the money to come from, Joe? Answer me that?’ Gloria demanded. ‘Shall I pluck it out of thin air or what?’

‘All right then,’ Joe said. ‘But why the camp? Why don’t you do what the other girls are doing and go into one of the shirt factories?’

‘I don’t know if they have any vacancies,’ Gloria said. ‘And anyway, I want to be surrounded by American people again and hear the sounds of home, because I still miss it, even after all these years.’

Joe listened to the wistfulness in Gloria’s voice, yet he shook his head as he said, ‘You know, if I agree to this, many of the townspeople will be scandalised. For Helen it will be bad enough, but for you, a wife and mother, to take up work in a camp full of young, unattached men, would be completely untenable to them, whatever argument we put up to justify it.’

‘I know,’ Gloria said, ‘but they have never taken to me anyway, so it’s no odds. Helen really is my only friend, and if she goes to work at the camp and I don’t, where will that leave me?’

Joe was silent as Gloria’s words sank in. None of those in Buncrana had seen the courageous side to Gloria that he had, and all that she had put up with. This was the first time that she had ever asked for anything for herself, and something too that would help the family.

‘Joe, what are you thinking?’

‘Of our lives together,’ Joe said. ‘It has been a bit of a roller coaster of a ride so far, I think. I never really expected you to conform to Buncrana’s standards. It would have been like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. But then, I had never envisaged that we would ever come back here to live.’

Gloria shrugged impatiently, ‘So, what are you saying, Joe?’

‘Well, I understand all you say about the job, but with me going off in the morning it isn’t something we need to decide here and now, surely. I need to give some thought to it. When this business is over this weekend, we will talk again.’

‘There’s no time for that,’ Gloria cried. ‘The vacancies will likely be gone unless I act fast.’

‘I can’t help that.’

Anger pulsed through Gloria’s veins again. ‘No, and you don’t care either,’ she yelled. ‘That’s what you hope: that they are gone and so is my chance.’

Joe didn’t speak. He felt that he had conceded a great deal by even agreeing to think about a potential job for Gloria in a military camp, never mind prepared to talk it over with her on his return. He knew it was far more than many of his friends in Buncrana would do and Gloria still wasn’t satisfied.

He was suddenly furiously angry with her and he strode across the room and snatched his jacket from the hook behind the door.

‘And where are you going now?’ Gloria demanded.

‘Out,’ Joe said. ‘To walk the bad humour off myself before I say something I will probably regret later.’

Joe left the next day, straight after he had done the milking, and Ben got up early to see his father off.

‘Can I come with you as far as the station?’

‘You’ll be late for school.’

‘No, I won’t,’ said Ben. ‘It’s hours yet.’

‘See what your mother says.’

‘Why don’t you?’ Ben said.

Joe looked at Gloria framed in the doorway of the cottage. He had the urge to take her in his arms and forget the quarrel, but he knew Gloria might reject his embrace and he couldn’t have borne that.

‘The lad wants to come as far as the station,’ he said. ‘That all right?’

Gloria didn’t answer him. She had expected Ben to ask that, and she looked directly at him and said, ‘You come straight back, mind.’

‘I will.’

‘Here, put your coat on,’ Gloria said, taking it from the back of the door and handing it to him. ‘It’s early enough to be chilly.’

As Ben shrugged himself into it, Joe glanced over his head to Gloria and said, ‘Goodbye, then.’

Gloria met his gaze levelly. ‘Goodbye, Joe.’

Joe sighed and as he picked up his case, he saw Ben’s eyes full of reproach, staring at him, and knew that he should have risked Gloria’s reaction and bid farewell to her properly. Oh, well, too late now, he thought as he turned on his heel and strode up the lane with his son beside him.