A New Kind of Bliss (11 page)

Instead of spilling his question, Aaron seemed hesitant, and it occurred to me that something might be troubling him. “Is something wrong?”

“No, no. It’s just that I feel a little awkward. It’s, uh, a sexual question.”

My ears perked up. I couldn’t imagine what was on his mind, but oh, the possibilities. “Okay, shoot.”

“I wanted to ask you…how do you feel about oral sex?”

I answered without hesitation. “Gosh, I’m crazy about it.” I felt him stiffen, and I realized I should have toned down my enthusiasm a bit. I wouldn’t want him to think…

“I haven’t been satisfying you, Emily?”

Oh, fine. Why didn’t I think before I opened my big trap? “Well, of course you have!” That was partially true, at least in the very broadest sense. I wasn’t unsatisfied, merely a little bored. “It’s just that…we’re still new, Aaron. We’re still learning how to please each other.” I felt rather satisfied with my own explanation. It sounded so hopeful.

Which was exactly how I felt.

After we relaxed a while longer in the tub we stepped into the huge stall shower to rinse off. The shower was bigger than any closet in Mom’s house and could probably hold a family of four. I thought that after we finished soaking we’d go straight to bed and, given his question about oral sex and my affirmative reply, devour each other. So it came as a complete surprise when he said, “It’s almost nine. Let’s go out back and watch the fireworks.”

I was speechless. I’d put on a new sexy sheer nightgown that fell just above my knees, with nothing underneath, and he was bare chested, wearing only a pair of plaid drawstring pants.

He pressed his lips against mine. “We can put the double lounger in a reclining position and maybe create a few fireworks of our own while we watch.”

“But won’t we have to get dressed?”

“No. My property is private. Let’s take the wine with us. I’ll get another glass from the kitchen.”

The show had just started when we went out onto the patio, which Aaron lit with just enough white light for us not to bump into the furniture. I relaxed on the double-wide lounge chair and took a sip of wine. Aaron’s hand rested on my thigh, but it soon moved and urged my legs apart. I closed my eyes and enjoyed his touch, feeling myself become damp as my excitement mounted along with the sound of the explosions above.

“You’re missing the fireworks,” he murmured.

I opened my eyes and watched the technicians’ handiwork, which was quite spectacular. Silently I chided myself for not being more amenable to Aaron’s suggestion. I should have known I could trust him.

I liked being fingered by him under the stars and the fireworks. But when he climbed on top of me I got nervous. “Aaron…out here?”

“Live a little, Emily. No one can see us.”

My missionary man,
I thought, but with fondness rather than frustration. I put my arms around his neck, and for once I didn’t mind making love in the same old position. It was exciting seeing the night sky light up as we moved together until we, like the lights in the sky above us, exploded.

The position might have been the same, but the sense of making love outdoors was a new kind of bliss altogether.

We brought it inside for Act Two, but there was a long delay between acts. When we got into bed we both drifted off. I opened my eyes a little past midnight, frowning at the unfamiliar surroundings.

Aaron lay on his back next to me, and I thought I saw a telltale lump in the linens in the area of his groin. My impulse came as swiftly as it did urgently.

I first lifted the covers to confirm his erection, and then I did what most red-blooded women would do.

He reacted with a grunt. I looked downward and saw that his big toes were bent backward. Then Aaron pushed the covers away. Good thing, too. It was getting a little hard for me to breathe down there.

“Emily,” he said in a half groan.

I couldn’t respond; my mouth was full.

For the next few minutes we both communicated with our mouths, but without intelligible words. Aaron grunted and moaned. I used my lips and tongue. When the first stream came from the tip of his penis, I sat up. My work here was done.

Aaron was busy enjoying his orgasm, so I decided to continue with my bold streak. Leaning in so that my face was just inches from his, I asked as tantalizingly as I could, “Did you like it?”

“God, yes.” He opened his eyes then, looking at me through sexy slits. “Whatever took me so long to tell you how much I like that?”

“I don’t know, but I’m glad you did,” I said angelically.

“I was a little apprehensive. You see, Diana, she didn’t…wouldn’t…”

“She wouldn’t give you head?”

“She had some sexual hang-ups. She felt so guilty when I gave it to her, in spite of how much she enjoyed it. It got so bad that I only did it…well, she always had an increase in her sex drive in the days before her period started, and I took advantage of that.” He shrugged. “Then she had a whole week to stop feeling remorseful.”

“She never warmed up to it?”

Aaron shrugged. “Like I said, she had some hang-ups. She felt that there was something morally wrong with oral sex, that it was something a lady didn’t indulge in. And I never could get her to do the same for me.”

So Diana had been too prudish to be bored. The reasons for my dull sex life were starting to make more sense to me now.

“I guess you must think I’m a slowpoke or something,” he said sheepishly.

“There’s nothing wrong with being cautious, Aaron.”

“I’m still getting used to this,” he said apologetically. “This whole thing with STDs…I never had to worry about that. Not that I think that you—”

I pressed my index finger to his lips. I took no offense. “We have to consider all the possibilities, Aaron. Not doing that would be foolish, and reckless, too. We’re both medical professionals, and we know more than anyone about the consequences of being sexually irresponsible.”

He grinned, obviously feeling relieved that he hadn’t hurt my feelings. “So I guess this means we’re no longer practicing safe sex, huh?”

“Well…I guess so. Are you all right with that?”

“Of course. Emily, I never believed that you carried any STDs.”

Even before he said his next words, I found myself wishing we could talk about something else.

“And I’m sure you’re not out there messing around with anybody else.” He chuckled. “Again, I do apologize for moving so slowly on this.” He stretched lazily, a sexy sight. “Wow. What a great way to wake up in the middle of the night.” He rolled over and lowered his head to mine, giving me a light kiss. As his face slid lower and lower down my body, finally settling between my thighs, it was suddenly my turn to squeal and moan with excitement and rapidly increasing pleasure…and then, finally, sigh with contentment.

“Aaron, can I ask you something?” I said as we cuddled in the center of his large bed. “Aside from what you just told me, did you ever step out on Diana?” Maybe I was jumping the gun, but I had to know if Aaron viewed cheating the way Al had. I never wanted to feel that devastation again, doctor or no doctor.

“Never,” he said without hesitation. “And I still believe that I should have been stronger then. I still feel guilty about having sex with a stranger while she lay deteriorating, requiring massive doses of Demerol to ward off seizures. But it really didn’t feel like cheating. That call girl meant nothing to me. I was so stressed out…. Diana’s doctors told me her case was terminal, and I didn’t know what I was going to do without her.”

I could hear the pain in his voice and knew he was telling the truth. “The role of caregiver is a difficult one, Aaron. There’s nothing wrong with needing release. You really shouldn’t beat yourself up. It’s not like you cheated on her before she became ill.”

I felt happy as I fell asleep in Aaron’s arms. His king-sized bed was swathed in the softest linens I’d ever slept on, and an abundance of oversized, fluffy pillows and a thick, feather-stuffed white quilt ensured a good night’s rest. I’d stayed at a Four Seasons once, and being in Aaron’s bed I felt like I’d gone back there. How marvelous to have this opulence at one’s disposal on a daily basis.

Most sofa beds were designed for occasional use by overnight guests, not to be slept on every night, and Mom’s was no exception. I’d forgotten how good it felt to sleep on a really comfortable mattress.

I spent the rest of the weekend at Aaron’s, just hanging out with him, exchanging thoughts and ideas about politics, economics, just about anything we thought of. At mealtimes we cooked together in the large gourmet kitchen, with its six-burner cooktop, double oven, Sub-Zero refrigerator with French doors, and work island with the pans hanging over it. The LCD television in the kitchen allowed us to keep up with the movie we were watching on cable while we created meals together. Aaron was an excellent cook. He made great scrambled eggs with smoked sausage, onion, and green pepper mixed in, plus shredded cheese on top.

We were getting really close emotionally and physically, and the lavishness of the surroundings was a bonus. I didn’t realize I could be this happy. Would six months in Euliss be enough time for me to see this thing with Aaron through all the way? I wasn’t sure just how serious this was.

I was prepared to go home Sunday night, but Aaron asked me to stay over. I figured Mom could do without me for another night, even though I was supposed to start showing her how to balance her checkbook. I’d been too busy with Aaron to have taken the first step toward preparing Mom to live on her own, which had been the reason for my coming back to Euliss in the first place.

But what if I ended up staying here in New York? What if Aaron turned out not to be just someone to pass the time with?

A
aron still slept soundly when I awoke Monday morning. I quietly slipped into the adjoining bathroom to dress.

This house still amazed me. I’d always known there were rich people in the world, of course. But it was difficult for me to grasp that people actually lived like this. I ran my fingertips over the cool marble countertop, with his and hers sinks made of the same material. His comb and brush, razor, deodorant, and toothbrush were neatly inside a small wicker basket by one of the sinks. I couldn’t help imagining my toiletries in a basket on the counter by the second sink, which currently looked so forlorn and empty.

I had coffee going by the time Aaron came downstairs, showered and fully dressed for work. He gave me a luscious, lingering good-morning kiss that was all the breakfast I needed, but when he made me his favorite breakfast—a toasted sesame seed bagel topped with cream cheese, bits of smoked salmon, and red onion—I became an instant devotee. I’d spent the first eighteen years of my life in New York and never once had bagels and lox. It was delicious.

“This is nice, isn’t it,” he said, smiling from his stool next to mine in the breakfast nook.

I nodded, smiling broadly. Aaron’s face glowed with contentment, and why wouldn’t it? He was able to entertain me in his home, and we were getting to know one another in a
real
way. There was more to our relationship than just sex…even though there was still room for improvement in that department. Last night had been a return to the same routine as before.

But I was still optimistic. I suspected that if our connection continued to bloom, Aaron would eventually offer me the lifelong position of his queen. He definitely was the marrying type.

I also knew that my little queendom wouldn’t necessarily be a happy place, not with Beverline’s open disdain, the resentment of Arden and Kirsten, and that damn portrait of Diana, which had been the first thing I saw when I came downstairs. That damn painting was fucking with me. I felt like her eyes were following me like a crazed stalker. Silly, I know.

Regardless of my semihallucinatory state when it came to Diana’s portrait, my gut told me Aaron wasn’t the type to shop around a lot. He’d already made the decision that he was ready to start dating again. If he met someone he cared about and who shared his feelings, chances were excellent that woman would become his second wife. Of course, we were a long way from anything like that happening…but the possibility that it could happen was nearly overwhelming.

And, considering our unfulfilling sex life, more than a little frightening.

“Emmie, you’re looking wonderful these days,” Mom said. “Your skin is just glowing. You ought to be in one of those Noxzema commercials.”

Heat rushed to my cheeks. My skin looked so great because I’d swallowed a healthy dose of Aaron’s semen over the weekend. They say it’s loaded with protein.

“What’s your secret?” she pressed.

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe it’s those new vitamins I’ve been taking.”

Teddy stopped in at Dr. Norman’s office the following Thursday. “Emily, are you doing anything for lunch today? I was hoping we could grab a bite downstairs. It’d be fun to catch up.”

“Sure. Twelve-thirty okay?”

Someone ran a café in the building’s lobby. It was actually quite nice; I’d eaten there with Gina, whom I’d replaced, last Friday. It had gotten her out of the office while the nurses set up the cake, coffee, and punch for her farewell party. The café served salads, burgers, chicken, and sandwiches, including a very tasty one made of rib-eye steak.

I arrived ahead of Teddy by about five minutes.

“Sorry I’m late,” he said, slipping into the chair opposite me. “I had to do a repair job of someone’s cap. They cracked it on a date-nut cookie.”

“That’s all right. We’re closed for an hour and a half, until two o’clock.”

“Old Dr. Norman never took that long for lunch. Must have been his sons’ idea.”

“Do you know them, Teddy?”

He shrugged. “Only to say hello. I see Dr. Norman whenever I need medical care. Most of the doctors in the building trade services for each other’s staff. But if you ask me, they seem a little uppity, like they can’t be bothered giving the time of day to anyone who doesn’t have an M.D.”

That was the vibe I’d gotten from them as well.

“Wait till one of them cracks a tooth. I’ll fix the bastard.”

I pictured Teddy deliberately not adjusting the doctor’s bite properly and having him come back in a day or two holding his painful jaw. It was a picture that, employers or not, made me smile. I hate uppity types.

“I know what you mean,” I said. “But I do like working there.” I’d expected him to pull out a pair of reading glasses to see the menu, but he didn’t seem to be having a problem. “Teddy, what happened to your glasses?”

“One word: LASIK.”

“Oh.” I waited as he perused the menu. Then I remembered Rosalind and the planned reunion. “Hey, Teddy, Rosalind and I are planning a twenty-fifth class reunion.”

“Planning? You’d better hurry up, or it’ll be a twenty-
sixth
reunion. Are you sure you can even find a place at this late date? I think most of the halls are booked way in advance for weddings, anniversary parties, things like that.”

“That’s true, but we won’t be holding it at a hall. That takes too much organizing, too much money up front. Rosalind and I thought we’d hold a picnic at her and John’s house and just invite people and have whoever shows up pay a nominal fee at the door, to help recover the food costs. At least this way we can send somebody to the store if we need more hamburgers. We can try asking people to RSVP, but you know how that goes. People don’t bother to respond; they just show up at the last minute.”

Teddy made a snorting sound. “Yeah, and if somebody ends up not getting a piece of chicken, they’ll talk about y’all like dogs. Lots of luck with
that
plan, Emily. Besides, do you really think John Hunter is going to allow a bunch of Euliss people in his house? Do you have any idea how many kids we graduated with have criminal records?”

He sounded just like Aaron’s mother-in-law, I thought with annoyance. Since when was it such a terrible thing to be from Euliss? “I don’t see why not, Teddy. We won’t be in the house, we’ll be in the yard. Besides, John is from Euliss himself, and so is Rosalind, even though they live in New Rochelle now.”

“Think about this, Emily. Most of the people who would come to a class reunion that’s held anywhere in this vicinity are going to be people from Euliss, meaning they’ll be black. Most of the white kids have moved to Connecticut or Jersey or Florida, and their parents have left town, too, so they have no reason to come back. Hell, a lot of the black kids are long gone, too. When’s the last time you saw Wendy Woods?”

“A long time. She’s in Baltimore someplace.” I giggled. “I’m sorry, but I never thought she would have the smarts to leave town. Sometimes I think the only one dumber than Wendy was Bitsy Mason.”

“Well, I haven’t seen Wendy lately, but I have seen Bitsy.”

“Really?” I leaned forward, interested in a bit of gossip. “How does she look?”

“Let me put it this way. They ought to start calling her Hefty.”

I laughed so loudly that other diners turned to look at me, but I couldn’t help it. “Stop making me laugh,” I said in a choked voice between giggles.

“Sorry. Listen, Emily, I hate to sound like a snob, but if I had a house, I sure wouldn’t invite our classmates over. A lot of them will bring guests, so you won’t know half the people who are there. Even at an outside function, people will find an excuse to go inside, like to use the bathroom. And what happens if it rains?”

My shoulders drooped. He had made valid points. “We did talk about renting Port-A-Sans, but the rain thing might be a problem.”

“Have it at a bar,” Teddy suggested. “You can probably negotiate a deal with the owners. They can get the bar business, they can split the admission profits with you, and a lot of bars have kitchens, so you might even be able to fix the food there.”

“You know, Teddy, you might have something there,” I said.

We spent the rest of our lunch reminiscing about old classmates. Teddy had a line on just about everybody and made many humorous references, even if some of them were in questionable taste, like the crack he made about Bitsy. I laughed so hard over his comments that I became short of breath.

“I suppose you know about Marsha Cox,” he said after giving me the lowdown on a classmate who’d been jailed for operating an identity-theft ring.

“No. I just saw her last week, when I was in for my interview with Dr. Norman. We exchanged numbers, but I haven’t had a chance to call her yet. She looks magnificent. What about her?”

“Hell, she
should
look good. She was married to a big-time drug dealer. Whatever she wanted to do to herself, he had the money to pay for it.”

“She was married to a
drug
dealer?” I repeated incredulously.

He shrugged. “Well, she was until somebody shot his ass last year. It was big news. He was the biggest dealer to come out of Harlem since Nicky Barnes. I heard the government confiscated everything they had and she had to move back in with her mother, in Sherwood Forest.”

“No, Teddy. Not Marsha.” I couldn’t imagine the woman with the elegant carriage I’d talked to in Dr. Norman’s waiting room living in a notoriously bad housing project. Forest, my butt.
Jungle
was more like it. But I couldn’t picture her living large off of drug money, either. The Marsha I’d known was a basically moral person. She wasn’t like Tracy Turner, who I felt positive had taken my lunch money that day in seventh grade when I received a restroom pass during science class and left my change purse at my desk.

Then again, a person could change a lot in twenty-five years.

“She did mention her husband had died,” I recalled. “Of course, she didn’t mention what he did for a living, but I guess that’s hard to admit.”

“She wanted to get out of the ghetto, Emily. So she had a chance to live the good life. I don’t think she realized it probably wouldn’t last.”

When the check arrived I reached for my wallet. “Here, let me give you something toward that.”

“Put your wallet away. This was my idea, remember? Save it for the reunion, since you and Rosalind insist on feeding half of Euliss. I can just see people stuffing food in their pockets.”

Laughing, I wiped my eyes with a corner of my cloth napkin. I couldn’t remember the last time I laughed so hard.

“We’ll have to do it again.”

Teddy didn’t miss a beat. “How about next week? Make it dinner.”

I stopped laughing. Lunch was one thing; dinner was something else. “Um…Teddy, I’m, um, kind of seeing someone. So dinner might be awkward.”

The corners of his mouth turned up in amusement. “‘Kind of’ seeing someone? That doesn’t sound very firm.”

He had a point. Aaron had said nothing about our relationship being exclusive. Well, he
had
said he was sure I carried no STDs, and that I wasn’t out there messing around with anyone else, but that wasn’t an
official
declaration, just a reassurance.

In my heart, I knew that was a sneaky way of sidestepping the issue or using the technical meaning to whitewash it, along the lines of the famous “I did not have sexual relations with that woman” because it had been just a blow job. Aaron had been married for a long time, and prior to that his girlfriend/future wife had been the only woman in his life. He probably assumed we were a couple, simply because that was what he was accustomed to.

“I guess it won’t be a problem,” I heard myself saying. “Let’s make it during the week, though.” At least that way it wouldn’t interfere with any weekend plans Aaron might make. I knew he’d be spending at least part of the weekend with his family in Sag Harbor.

Teddy shrugged, like he didn’t get what all the fuss was about. “Next Thursday, then?”

“Thursday would be fine.”

We passed on getting on the first elevator after six adults and two children got inside. “I’m curious about something, Teddy,” I said as we waited for the other elevator to arrive. “When’s the last time you saw Tanis?”

“I just saw her on TV the other day. A household product commercial, I think.”

I felt certain he knew that wasn’t what I meant. “I mean in person.”

“Oh. Hell. Years. Last time I saw her she had her original nose.”

I laughed. “I noticed that change, too.”

“It’s definitely an improvement. You could eat lunch on that old honker she had.”

Indignant, I lowered my chin to my chest. “So why’d you dump me for her in the eighth grade?”

He didn’t hesitate. “I was a typical junior high school kid, Emily.”

“And what’s that mean?”

“It means she had bigger boobs.”

I laughed. This made for just another time when I’d been bested by Tanis. I could laugh about it easily, though, because that was then. This was now.

And
I
had Aaron.

We parted ways and headed for our respective offices without so much as a peck on the cheek. It had been a completely chaste meal, but Aaron would certainly be disappointed if he learned about the date I’d just made. Not that he’d ever find out about it. Nor was there any need for him to worry. It would be completely harmless, just two old friends catching up on twenty-five years.

There I went again, evading the truth about what might come of dinner. Who was I kidding? I mean, just how much catching up could two people do? Teddy Simms looked at me like he wanted to put me on a plate and suck me like a barbecued chicken wing.

And I couldn’t deny that I didn’t mind being the appetizer if he’d be the entrée.