A Reason To Breathe (8 page)

“You always carry a flashlight?”

“A girl can never be too prepared, I’ve got everything in this bag; flashlight, tools, extra batteries, even some rope.”
Rope?

“You scare me a little just so you know.”

“I get that a lot.”

“You look like a pixie, but you’re really more like gremlin.”

Mandy smiled and winked at me, then pointed the flashlight in the room, as we tried to look around. It was a bedroom; the bed was unmade, there were clothes all over the floor and dishes stacked on the nightstand and dresser.

“The guy is a pig, no wonder he isn’t married,” Mandy mumbled. I moved to the next window and tugged her arm as I passed so she’d bring the flashlight. It was the living room, and it was just as messy as the bedroom. I was just about to tell her we were wasting our time when an SUV pulled down the road from the highway and then pulled into the driveway.
 
Shit
. We moved back down the side of the cabin and plastered ourselves to the side. My heart was racing as we heard the door to the SUV slam shut, and then heard stomping on the steps heading to the front door. Holding my breath, afraid he would hear me panting, we heard the door open, and I was just about to let out my breath, when my cell phone rang out loud with my stupid, stupid ring tone. John Denver’s “Rocky Mountain High” set on loud, broke the quiet of the night, and I scrambled to pull it from my pocket….
Shit, shit, shit,
please God, let him be deaf. I hit reject on my phone and looked at Mandy whose eyes were huge. I was so busy messing with my phone; I never heard if the front door closed. Using my eyes to indicate we should get the hell out of there, Mandy nodded in agreement, so I held up my hand and counted down, one…two…three, and we took off running…. only to be stopped by the sound of a shotgun firing.

“Stay right where you are, put your hands up and walk back towards me,” said a very pissed off man. We both put our hands in the air, as my phone started ringing… Again, John’s golden voice mocked me in the night.

“Keep moving, get your ass’ up here and sit down while I call the Sheriff.”

“I’d rather you shot me now than deal with the Sheriff,” for some reason came from my mouth. I may not know Jack well, but I’m pretty sure the lecture I was going to get, on top of being arrested, would be worse than when I told my parents I was pregnant at eighteen. Mandy chuckled, so I shoved my shoulder into hers, as we walked toward the cabin.

“What the fuck,” said the man, as we made our way up the steps.

“Hey, Chad,” Mandy replied, and he narrowed his eyes at her.

For the third time my phone started ringing, so without thinking or looking to see who was calling, I answered it.

“Hello?”

“Jenn? Where the fuck are you? You were supposed to call when you made it home,” yelled a pissed off Jack.
Oh, dear lord.

“Get your fucking hands in the air,” barked Chad. So, of course I listened to the man with a gun and threw my hands up. Without. Hanging. Up. I could hear shouting from the phone when Mandy stepped up and said.

“Chad, we can explain…. where were
you
today around three?” 

“I was in Denver on business; my grandmother died, and I met with her attorney, why?” He replied sarcastically. Mandy’s hands were on her hips, giving him attitude like he wasn’t standing there with a loaded gun.

“There was a murder today and if you
were
there, then there's no harm, no foul.”

I looked back and forth between them, wondering, not for the first time, why me? Arms raised; I could still hear Jack shouting comments. Pretty sure there was a “Christ.” “Fuck.” “Sonofabitch.” And
my
personal favorite… “Pain in my fucking ass.” Needless to say, even if Mandy talked us out of this, I was screwed.

“Whoa, wait, you’re here ‘cause you think I killed someone?”

“Well, you're on our list, and we have a lot of people to check out.” That comment got a, “Jesus fucking Christ,” response from the phone, and Chad turned to me.

“Who the fuck are you?”

“I’m Jennifer, nice to meet you, and sorry for thinking you could be a killer. We don’t really think you did it; we're just checking out everyone age 20-55.”

“I don’t give a fuck, so sit your ass down while I call the Sheriff.” I heard a barked laugh on the phone and decided I’d end this torture; I handed over my phone to Chad and said.

“Here you talk to him, tell him I’m
not
a pain in the ass, I’m
stubborn
, and not to bother coming by tonight ‘cause I’ll be busy packing for Breckenridge.” Chad took the phone from me with a confused look, put it to his ear, said “Hello,” and then winced.

“Sheriff…yes, sir…yes, sir…no, sir…uh, yeah, I’ll tell her.” Chad then hung up….

“Well, what’d he say?” I asked. Not that I really wanted to know, I was pretty sure I could guess, but curiosity killed the cat, and all.

“He said to get Mandy’s ass home, get your ass home, and if you went anywhere near Breckenridge he’d have you hauled in for whatever charges he could think of.”

I looked at Mandy, then grabbed my phone from Chad, and without another word, headed to my Jeep. 
I swear Kansas looks better and better every day!!!

Chapter Nine

I’m mocking you

“
That sonofabitch, he’s waiting for her.  The anger rises up my throat and almost chokes me. I know he can’t see me, but he turned his head and looked right at me, like he senses me. I watched that smug bastard as his eyes scanned, searching for what he couldn’t see… That’s right, Sheriff, I’m here, I can see you, I’m watching you…can you feel it? How much time you have left to live? Not tonight, but soon, very soon, one way or another you will die…then MY
Jennifer will be free of you.”

       Denver, I bet I could find a job in Denver.
I’ve decided Breckenridge isn’t big enough to hide in; I need a big city to avoid the long arm of the law, or in this case one lawman in particular. I could buy a cabin closer in and drive to work like all the other mountain dwellers. I turned onto Old Saw Mill Road and as the lights of my cabin came into view, so did the truck of the Gunnison County Sheriff.
Dammit, caught before my escape.
I pulled in next to his truck, as Jack leaned with his arms crossed over his chest, glaring at me. I smiled weakly at him, and he just shook his head slowly at me. I knew I should be contrite, but I felt my survival instincts kick in, and I squared my shoulders for the confrontation that was coming. Jack shoved off his truck and headed to my door to open it, so I grabbed my bag and turned as the door threw open.

“I should tan your hide.” Was the first thing out of his mouth and being the idiot I was, evidence to this fact after agreeing to look for dead bodies in the first damn place, my temper flared.

“Oh yeah? Well you can try but I’ll warn you now, I took self-defense classes back home and my instructor said I had a mean aim…. between the legs.” Jack didn’t even react to my threat, just leaned in and barked out his reply.

“Woman, you had a gun pointed at you tonight, you were trespassing and let’s not forget conducting an investigation into a killer, which I might add, you’re on the victims list. You were reckless; you disobeyed me,
and
you put Mandy in danger.”

“I am not reckless, we wouldn’t even have been caught if
you
hadn’t called my phone.” Jack’s head snapped back, and he looked at me like I grew two heads. So, I took this opportunity to move past him and ran up the steps, unlocked my front door, pushed it open, and flipped on the living room lights, as Jack slammed the door behind me.

“I’m not done talking about this, Jenn.”

“Fine, tell me how stupid I was, tell me how you’re gonna arrest me if I leave the county, threaten me with interfering in an investigation and then leave. I’ve had a weird twenty-four hours, Jack, and I just want something to eat and go to bed.”

“How come I get the feeling anything I say is gonna go in one ear and out the other?”

“Perceptive man,” I shouted.

“Christ, you’re a pain in my ass,” he shouted back.

“Well there’s the door, Jack, don’t let me keep you.” I turned towards the kitchen and grabbed the kettle, filling it with water. I heard the door behind me open and then slam, and just like that I deflated.
Shit.
Lowering my head and taking a deep breath, I knew it was for the best that the man would chew me up. I had no business starting something with him. He was too bossy, full of himself, beautiful, interesting, and altogether out of my league. But that didn’t stop me from wishing it could be different. With all my mouthing off about not wanting him to pursue me, saying he was moving too fast, the truth hit me hard…I may not like it, but I clearly wanted it. “Shit.” Sighing, I turned to the stove and gasped when I looked up and saw Jack leaning one shoulder against the front door watching me.

“You got a temper on you, Babe.” I could feel the blood rise up my face, so I ducked my head and continued on to the stove.

“You gonna tell me why you put yourself and Mandy at risk?”

“It just sort of happened, Jack. Mandy was going over my suspect list and when I gave her a ride home we were passing Chad’s cabin and it just, ya know, happened.”

Jack shook his head again and stared at me for a moment, then he looked back at my windows and moved towards them. He checked the latches on each window and then moved to the bathroom. I stayed in the kitchen, got a mug down and a packet of hot cocoa mix, trying to stay busy and not watch Jack move around my house. Having Jack in the cabin, taking care of me, I realized how long it had been since I had anyone in my life on a daily basis. With Bailey at school and Doug gone, I went to work and came home. Other than Ben, who stopped by frequently to check in on me, I hadn’t had anyone to my house since I got here. And all those plans I had for hiking and riding the river with Gerry had never happened either. I may have moved myself to my dream, but it occurred to me I wasn’t exactly living that dream. Jack being here reminded me of what it was like to come home from work and have someone waiting for me, and it was painful to remember.

“Windows are secure, the locks are solid. Noticed your front door has double locks and a barrel bolt, use them all.” That caught my attention, and I looked to the door. When I left this evening, I had a single lock and no barrel bolt. Looking around, I saw an envelope with my name written on it. “Jenny,” in Ben’s hen scratching lay on the table by the front door. I walked over and opened it and saw a short note with keys. “
Jenny, keep them locked, Ben.”
I smiled. Having a father figure looking out for me this far from home, warmed my heart, but just intensified the feelings I was already having. I felt a tear fall down my cheek, and I wiped it away, but there were more replacing it. I don’t even know why I was crying? Loneliness? Knowing someone cared and was looking out for me? I was about to turn around and move back to the kitchen when I heard Jack move in my direction.

“Sweetness?” I heard from behind me and then Jack wrapped both his arms around my waist and pulled me into his chest. I closed my eyes at the feeling of arms around me again. What was wrong with me tonight?

“Hey, Jenn, talk to me, why the tears?”

“Sorry, it’s just been a while since I felt cared about, and Ben reminds me of my dad.” I pulled away from him and wiped my face with my hands, then picked up my key chain to attach the new keys.

“Must have been hard moving here on your own?”

“Actually, it’s one of the easiest things I’ve ever done.” I looked back at Jack and smiled, then moved back to the kitchen.

“You want a hot cocoa?”

“I’ll pass, thanks, why was it easy?”

“It’s been my dream since I was little. When Doug died, and Bailey left for school; I thought about what I wanted for my life and the mountains were the first and only thing that came to mind.”

“That’s still a big step to take moving away from your family.”

“My brother moved to California ten years ago, and my mother and father retired to Florida three years ago, so I wasn’t leaving anyone behind except a few friends.”

“So here you are, ready to take on the whole of Colorado and a killer at the same time?” Rolling my eyes since he managed to move back to the subject of my disobeying him, I decided not to fight again.

“You made your point earlier Jack, you’re right, it was stupid what we did and I don’t plan on making the same mistake.”

“Babe, I’ve known you about thirty-six hours, and in that time I’ve learned pretty damn quick that you’re going to do whatever the hell you feel like doing. That being said; I’m gonna do my damnedest to try and keep up with you so I can catch you when you fall. But honest to god, right about now, locking you in a cell sounds pretty damned good to me; at least there I know you’re safe.” I rolled my eyes then it hit me what he said.

“Has it only been thirty-six hours? It feels longer.”

“Longest fucking thirty-six hours of my life.” 

“I know what you mean.”

And I did, two bodies, one break-in, three toe-curling kisses, a gun pointed at me, three men either asking me out or giving me puppy dog eyes, and let’s not forget Ben and Gerry. Mandy was right; I
am
the shiny new toy, and just like all toys they will get tired of playing with me.
Was I hoping for or dreading that day?
 

“Jesus, you’re somethin’ else, you know that?”

“What’d I do now?”

“If I didn’t know any better I’d say you’re fearless.”

“Ha, I’m scared to death most days Jack, I just hide it well.”

Jack had been slowly moving towards me during our conversation and by the time I finished my statement, he was looking down at me. Without warning, he picked me up and deposited me on the countertop, so I was even with his face. He pushed in, so I had to open my legs, then he grabbed my ass and pulled me against his hips, and I sucked in a breath at having his crotch up against my heat.

“You scared of me?” he whispered, looking into my eyes.

“Yes,” barely came out, but I nodded with the word.

“Let’s see if we can change that?”

And just like the last three times he kissed me, I didn’t stand a chance. He went slower this time; keeping his eyes locked on mine as he lowered his head infinitesimally, and my heartbeat picked up. Right before his lips touched mine, he smiled, and then his eyes lowered to my lips and he leaned in, and then nipped my bottom lip. I moaned as the shock of it went straight through me like an electrical current. Jack’s eyes darkened at my reaction, and he whispered, “Jesus.” I didn’t need any more prompting; I threw my hands in his hair, wrapped my legs around his waist and went straight for his mouth. His hand grabbed my hair, and he pulled, holding me back. He looked down at me with a face full of need, and I felt that run through me and up the amps of electrical current coursing through me. Jack moved to my exposed neck and kissed his was up to my ear, and then nipped my lobe. I shuddered, and he growled in my ear, “You like my teeth?”

“Please,” came from my mouth even though I’d never been bitten, the evidence pulsing between my legs suggested that I did, in fact, like his teeth. Nipping and biting his way down my neck, I was a trembling mess when he came back to my mouth. “Jack—” was all I got out when he slammed his mouth over mine.

Leaning into me, I found myself flat on the countertop, and my hips arched up to feel the pressure of his body on mine. Jack’s free hand moved down my side and lifted the hem of my shirt. Then with light fingers, caressed my side from my ribs to my hip, causing a shiver. Jack ripped his mouth from me and put his forehead to mine.

“If I don’t stop now, I’ll be buried deep in you till morning.”

“Right now I can’t think of a reason to stop you.”

“Baby, do not tempt me. I’m trying to be honorable here.”

“Jack, I haven’t had sex in sixteen months,” I whimpered. God, I sounded pathetic, begging him when I knew I shouldn’t be jumping into bed with this man.

“Jesus,” Jack replied conflicted.

His mouth said no, but his body rubbed against mine and I felt a building in my core. I groaned and bucked my hips, and he rubbed again.

“Jack, more,” I begged, and his face grew darker, hungrier. His hand moved up to my breast; his thumb and finger found my nipple, and then he pinched and pulled, as I whispered, “Yes.” He ripped my shirt up, and pulled my bra down, attaching his mouth to my breast. He sucked my nipple deep and then used his teeth; the friction and his mouth building me higher and I felt a building orgasm between my legs.

“Jack, please.” I couldn’t wait any longer; I needed this. Then with more pressure, and a hard pinch on my nipple, Jack threw me over the plateau and into bliss saying, “Let go, Baby, I got you, you’re safe with me.” I tensed when it hit me, holding my breath as the warmth ran over my body, and then relaxing as it swept through me like no drug could. Jerking with the aftershocks, Jack’s eyes were watching as I fell over into sexual heaven. “Fuck,” Jack groaned and then he lowered his head to my ear. “Gotta tell you, Sweetness, you’re every man’s wet dream.  I can’t wait to watch your face when I’m deep inside you.”

I was too relaxed to care; I nuzzled his neck, nipping and licking. My sex-starved body decided being a slut worked for her, and after hearing Jack talking dirty, I was ready to test his theory. Jack inhaled deeply as I worked his throat, moaning.

“Jenn, baby, only so much a man can take.”

“Let go Jack, your heart’s safe with me.”  I whispered in his ear, and he froze, turned his head to look at me, and his face went soft. Do
not
ask me why I said that, I plead the fifth. Jack smiled at me then kissed my lips gently and on a whisper said, “Good to know, Jenn.”

I was about to come up with some flippant excuse for talking about hearts and flowers thirty-six hours after meeting this man, but something crashed through my window, shattering the calm. Jack jerked up bringing me with him, and he shoved me down into a squat on the kitchen floor and ordered, “Do not fucking move, you hear me?” Nodding my full agreement, ‘cause after the last two days I wasn’t arguing, and watched Jack draw his weapon from his holster. He moved to the window, looked outside, and then moved to the door unlocking it. He brought his gun up in front of his chest and then moved through the door, swinging his outstretched arms back and forth, scanning with his gun. After what seemed like an hour, but was more like five minutes, he came back inside and shut, then locked the door. I stood and watched him move towards whatever broke my window, then he bent over and picked up something dark, and I gasped when I saw it was a bird.