Authors: Chaundra Soliz
My nigga Jeremy is blaring on the horn, so I lock up my crib and head into the streets. I dap both my niggas up and we start talking shit about last night. JR had spent the night with a bad ass Mexican chick that ended up being the ultimate tease causing him to get blue balls. That dude JR is always overdoing it when it comes to stories about women. He blows everything out of proportion but he i
s still my bruva from another muva. Jeremy went home to his wife Tiffany and she apparently flipped on his ass for being out too late. I just shake my head because I don’t put up with a female trying to put her foot down, that shit is for the feathered pigs. That’s why I enjoy being single. I fill them fools in on how I smashed on Piper and they can’t believe it. They thought she was finished with my ass for how I went after her girl. “Man ol’ girl done turned into a freak… and her head… man the shit is on point!” I spill the goodies on Piper. “Her pops came through my shit last night too. Straight up on some gangsta ass shit. This nigga was in my crib unannounced and shit. So just as I’m about to lay the pipe to shorty I find his ass sitting in my living room having a mafuckin drink.” We all laugh.
“What? How that nigga get in?” Jeremy asks.
“He said he got the keys to the city man.” I say shaking my head still in disbelief.
“That shit is crazy.” JR says. “So what the fuck he wanted?”
“Yo’ my mans told me if some shit happens to his daughter I’m good as gone.” I inform them. “I told him if his baby girl keeps ridin’ my dick like a pony then she ain’t got none to worry about.”
“Your bitch ass ain’t said that shit!” Jeremy calls me out.
“Yeah you right I didn’t, but shit that’s what I wanted to say.” I joke.
“This the same bitch you was kickin
g it with in the city? Your student right? What’s her name again?” JR asks.
“Yeah man, that’s her Piper. She was my student last semester.” I correct him.
“Man you gonna fuck around and marry that broad,” Jeremy laughs. “Watch.”
“Na son, fuck all that. I aint trying to be tied down to no any one bitch,” I mean that shit.
“Bruh you spent the holidays with the bitch and now you meeting her old man and shit.” Jeremy starts preaching again. “I’ve been knowing you what? Ten or so years and never once have you spent this much time with nobody. I know you man, this is the one.”
I think back to the night I met my boys over ten years ago now. We were getting ready to pledge at Hudson University and the hazing was mad stupid. It was a late Thursday night and finals were coming up that Monday bringing the semester to a close. Our DP had us getting lifted almost every night just to drop us off in the middle of nowhere to find our own way home. They would take our money, cellphones, and wallets and just hang us out to dry. I had strongly considered dropping out on several occasions but I had to be one of those ice-cold, Alpha Theta brothers, one of the phinest to ever do it. Jeremy always had a plan and that night was no different. We headed into a hole in the wall bar to get out of the cold winter air.
“Man
say, how they gone play us like this?” JR complained once inside. “We some Texas niggas we aint used to this cold ass D.C. weather.”
“I’m about to figure something out,” Jeremy was an optimist.
“What part of Texas?” I was laughing my ass off. JR was acting like it was a damn snow blizzard outside or some shit like that.
“Dallas bro…where you from?”
JR asks.
“I’m from Harlem baby…NYC.” I was proud to admit that.
A fine ass sister was walking by and Jeremy reached over and grabbed her hand to catch her attention. “What’s your name cutie?” Jeremy asked the fine ass sister with the sexiest lips I’d ever seen and the most generous booty a woman could have.
“Tiffany
,” she was cheesing so hard I swear all 32’s were exposed.
Long story short, Jeremy talked some fire game to her ass, fucked her in the backseat
of her station wagon and got her to take us back to the dorms. He is actually married to her ass today. Every since then, the three of us have been cooler than a fan. We became frat brothers a few weeks later, went on to graduate eventually, got our masters, then our PHD’s and them niggas talked me into moving to Houston.
We talk shit play ball and talk more shit. At the end of the day I puts it down on the court so I won every match I played in. I have to have my “I could’ve went pro” speech that every nigga has after a few good ball games. Them dudes are talking mad shit but it’s cool because I know how it feels to take a few L’s. I just keep on celebrating because I like to shine, even if I’m on my own. Not for nothing though, I do it because I’m
that
nigga. I’m not cocky, I’m just sure of myself and it’s a New York thing.
Back in the car I fire up a blunt and take a few drags from it then pass it. We are headed to get a fresh cut in the hood when I see what looks like Piper walking with some other cat. I shake my head and figure it is the weed getting to me. I look at my phone and haven’t heard a peep out of her and it i
s nearly three o’ clock. I call her cell to see what is up but she doesn’t answer. ‘That girl must be tired as a muva,’ I am in my feelings. Then I get a text from B ‘DUH I’M A ROCKSTAR. WHAT’S UP WITH YOU? WHY DID I SLEEP ALONE LAST NIGHT?’ I like B’s free spirit because she is a lot like me but I don’t like the desperate behavior she gives off. That’s most definitely a turn off but she can still get the D. I decide not to text her back because I will get at her as a last option kind of thing. There is no such thing as too many back up bitches.
I make it back home around 5 and my door is unlocked. Piper is nowhere to be found and that shit has me red. Just up and leave without letting me know, all the while leaving my door unlocked. I usually have to get rid of females so it is a relief but she could’ve let me know something. The situation is ignorant to me but it’s nothing I can do about it for now. But I will catch up with her sooner or later. ‘I’ll check her young ass eventually.’ I look around my condo to make sure nothing is missing. Once content that everything is everything, I fall into my plush brown sectional and retreat.
I had clearly made a fool of myself and had to
o much to drink the other night. I just wanted to show Piper a good time for her birthday. I am paying for it now because I have had an awful migraine the past two days. I take some aspirin to ease the pain with a full class of orange juice.
Ugh
! I have a class coming up soon so I get up to get ready. A school t-shirt and some jeans will do fine for today. Not exactly jazzy but school spirit works sometimes, right? Only three hours and the rest of the day will be mine to do whatever I choose. The hard part is getting there because I am so not in the mood.
“Where the hell you going to dressed like that?” Piper laughs. She is just walking through the door.
“Class.” I say dryly.
“Class?” She asks skeptically.
“Yes you know, to try and get the thing we’re actually here for… an education.” I respond sarcastically.
“Okay Miss Sarcastic. You know you have to go to class more than one day a week to get that right?” Perfect Piper always has a patronizing comeback.
“I know. I know. I’m going to get my shit together,” I sigh.
I hate how Piper always manages to juggle all of this school shit so gracefully. No matter how hard we party she makes it to class everyday on time. No matter how long we stay up gossiping she still studies and hard at that. Her ass made all A’s last semester, a whopping 4.0 a
nd me? Well I got all C’s. Can anyone be that perfect? I hate to admit it but I’m jealous of her.
I’m just sitting in class twiddling my thumbs bored to death. I can think of a million other things I could be doing besides this history class. Maybe if my history teacher didn’t sound like a vacuum cleaner
, I’d be halfway interested. Sounding monotone must be a requirement to teach this course because my history I teacher from last semester sounded exactly the same.
“Dr. Burton,” I approach my sloppy, potbelly professor after class. His salt and pepper beard is stained with coffee and he smells of cigarette smoke. “Can I talk to you about test 1?”
“What about it?” He has the nerve to actually start coughing. Geesh his breath is kicking.
“I don’t know how I got a 70, I studied all night long,” I lie. I only studied the few minutes I had in class before the exam was administered. “Is there some extra credit I can do or something?”
“No ma’am. I do not give extra credit to any single student because then I have to do it for everyone.” He says as he is turning off the projector.
“But I really don’t want to fail,” I bat my eyelashes in hopes to charm him just a little. Now I regret the outfit I am wearing today.
“I’m sure you’ll be fine because it’s only the first test. Try finding a study group, those usually help quite a bit.” He smirks with his yellow teeth.
“Yeah okay,” with that I walk out of the building.
Well, so much for trying to seduce a fat, funky whale. I wasn’t planning on smashing him but I would have showed him some skin if he’d acted the least bit interested. A study group? Really? Me? As if I have time for that.
My phone vibrates interrupting my thoughts.
“Hello,” I answer.
“Hey babe what you doing?” It’s my boo
DJ.
“Nothing just got out of class. What are you doing?” I ask casually.
“About to get on this madden… hold on Brianna…Aye man 3 games, a hunnid dollars,” DJ is yelling to somebody in the background. “Sorry about that…yeah so come over and chill with ya boy.”
“I’ll be there in a few, love you,” I hang up.
DJ’s frat house is a pigsty as usual. Beer bottles are scattered all over the floor, dirty dishes on every end table, and weed roaches on the couches, just a mess. I would help clean it up if I knew how. But my spoiled ass has never lifted a finger, unless it was to swipe my black card. Now, shopping is something I can do very well but even that gets old sometimes. Okay, I’m lying to myself just a little bit because you can never shop too much.
“What’s up B?” DJ greets me when I enter their game room. He is playing that game like his life depends on it.
“Hey.” I kiss him on his head. “You winning?”
“I’m about to give it to these niggas raw,” he starts talking shit. “Sit right next to me baby
, I need some good luck.”
“What’s up Carter? I heard about what happened with you and my girl Piper. I’m sorry.” I turn around and say to Carter who is sitting on the couch watching the game.
“I’m good on that B. Shit it ain’t like she the only fish in the sea.” Carter shrugs his shoulders.
I turn back around to watch the game because I don’t want to get in the middle of their drama. Plus, I didn’t want him to say anything out of line because I’m not in the mood to get into it with anyone today. I hope DJ
doesn’t think I came over here to watch him play video games. Then again, I really don’t feel like having sex with his minuteman ass today so maybe this isn’t so bad. I am only with him now for the sake of having a boyfriend and his head is decent. I mean it isn’t mind blowing but I cum sporadically. Maybe if he spent half as much energy beating this pussy up than he does on that game, I could stop faking some of my orgasms.
My phone vibrates.
‘Come to the bathroom?’ It is a text from Zeke. The hottie I met at the club the other night.
I am reluctant b
ecause I’m thinking maybe he has sent the text to the wrong person. But anything is better than watching Madden so it is a long shot worth taking. I take a deep breath and pray he is in this bathroom. I open the door and there he stands.
“Zeke, what are you doing here?” I whisper looking behind me before I shut the door. I am shocked and elated to see him. His lovely face is like a breath of fresh air. “I didn’t know you were an AT.”
“Now you know. What’s up with you rock star?” He says with his hands resting on his belt buckle. There is no way a man can be this good-looking. “What you doing over here?”
“Do you know DJ?” I ask.
“Derrick Johnson yeah why?” He asks nonchalantly.
“Well he is my boyfriend and I’m just hanging out with him for a little bit.”
“So if that’s your man why you in here wit me shorty?” He is eyeing me down.
“I really came to see if you were
really in here because I didn’t know you lived here. I’ve never seen you and I come over a lot.” This is partly true but I am leaving out the part where I wanted him to be in here.
“I don’t live here, I’m the fraternity advisor,” he assures me. “However, if that was the case
, why are you
still
in here?”
“Because I want to be,” I say
matter of factly. “Why didn’t I go home with you last night after the club?”
“Because I went home with someone else.” He says looking down at his cell phone.
“Damn your honest. Who did you go home with? I’m sure I could’ve showed you a better time.” I give him a self-assured grin.
“You s
ure about that?” he pulls me closer to him. “I’m here now so you can show me how a rock star parties.”
“I could do that but first tell me who you went home with last night so I can go kick her ass for making me miss out.” I am genuinely curious. I’m sure I don’t know whoever the girl is but if he has a woman
, I have a right to know.
“Ya girl Piper ai
n’t let you know what was up?” He looks somewhat shocked, a little disappointed even.
“Wait a second,” I back up off of him for some clarity. “Piper Smith? The one that was at the club wit
h me?”
“Yeah that’s her.” He rubs his chin.
“So are y’all in a relationship or something?” I don’t even think I want to know the answer.
“Does it matter if we are or not?” He has the nerve to have a frown on his face.
“Hell yeah it matters, she’s my best friend!” I raise my voice. “Are y’all together or not?”
“
Yo kill that noise ma because she don’t got shit to do with this. What’s up wit you and me?” He asks.
“I thought you were trying to talk to me last night so how did that happen?” I am way past perplexed.
“I did but by the end of the night you were trashed so, you know. Shit happens.” He shrugs his shoulders and goes back to looking at his phone.
“So I was drunk and you decide to go home with my friend?” Pissed doesn’t describe the way I feel.
“If that’s how you feel,” The motherfucker actually has the nerve to chuckle.
“I have to go,” I storm out of the bathroom and hastily walk out of that house.
On my way back to the dorm room, I am trying to make sense out of everything. My best friend trying to talk to a guy I cut for is beyond me. I can barely remember what happened at the club because I was so wasted so I feel like I am missing a piece of information. Zeke said they were fucking… as if more than once. I don’t recall Piper ever telling me about sleeping with anyone besides Carter. Finding out from Zeke hurts because my girl and me are better than that. Why would Piper try to play me? Who exactly is Zeke and what the hell is an advisor to a fraternity? So many questions and not enough answers. I just need to talk to Piper because I am sure there is a reasonable explanation. Piper and I are as thick as thieves so one thing I know, can’t no nigga break our bond. BOND as in Bitches Over Niggas and Dicks.